Darkness Within Your Light
by AuraBlackWolf
Summary: It was all suppose to end after Ryuk wrote in the deathnote, but redemption and an upcoming catastrophe give Raito another chance, will he chose to walk the same path as Kira? Or will he repent for his sins? Will he choose to save or destroy again? Yaoi
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: I do not own Death Note, nor do I make any money from writing this. It is the property of Tsugumi Ohba and Takeshi Obata.

This is a Yaoi FanFiction, for all those clueless readers out there that means it is a homosexual story between two men. If that is not your cup of tea then I ask that you click the back button now. This is rated M for a reason, there will be lemon (sex) later on in the story so I will say it again, if you don't like that then please leave quietly. Though I ask you to please give my story a chance, it's rocky at first but it gets a lot better later.

This is the Betaed version, I am reposting chapters that have been betaed by the wonderful **VirtualDraconium** this person is awesome!

Also **Skyhe **sent me a Super-betaed version of this chapter a while ago and I quite liked a few things in it. (I agree with you Skyhe, calling Raito "The Entity" is awkward so I altered it a bit.)

It was very hard for me to pick between you guys, and I also have an IRL friend that also wanted to beta my story. But I am happy with my choice and I hope that my much cleaner chapters make everyone happy too.

Thank you to the both of you! I hope to have the other Betaed versions of this story up soon!

* * *

Darkness-it was all that he could see. It surrounded him, embraced him, and filled him inside and out. He wasn't able to feel his body, he tried to move his arm where he assumed his arm would be, but he felt nothing. He tired to shout, to make some sort of noise but… nothing. How could one make noise without a body? Trying not to panic was strangely easy, it was like any emotion he had was muted. He tired to remember what had happened, only to realize that he didn't even know who he was. Now, he did feel some sort of panic.

"_Who am I? Where am I?" _he thought to himself, or maybe he was even speaking aloud, it was hard to tell in this place. He tried to remember anything at all about himself. Time passed, or it might not have; it could have been mere minutes or many years that he had been here.

"_Maybe I've always been here? Maybe this is my home? Or this could be some sort of punishment or something; maybe I did something bad and now have to repent and suffer in this place." _He snorted in disgust.

"_Like that would work, if it is some sort of repentance wouldn't it be smarter for me to remember what I did in order to know what I'm suppose to have done in order to repent!?" _After that long and drawn out sentence that made not sense at all, he decided to take a break about trying to recall his forgotten memories and to instead try to see if he could explore his surroundings at all.

After moving for a while, at least what he hoped was moving, he finally noticed that the darkness that had always surrounded him seemed-to have lost essence? Well, it seemed like it was just lessened somehow. It was still completely dark around him, but it didn't seem like it was quite so oppressive or invasive any more. He also noticed that he didn't feel as muted as before. While before he'd hardly felt anything, now it seemed that he felt-cold and scared?

"_Now that's different, and quite annoying. Why would I be scared?" _Just as he thought that he was bombed with emotions.

If he could have screamed he would have been wailing in agony over the emotion that overloaded and seemed to hit him all at once.

**Anger… Fear…Hate… Joy… Revulsion… Terror… Hope… Dread… Disgust… Affection?**

They all seemed to be equal in their intensity and there were more negative emotions than positive ones. All he wanted to do was curl up into a ball and pray that the emotions would go away, or at least lose some of their intensity.

After a while in which it seemed that an eternity had passed, it finally seemed that the emotions were calming down inside of him.

"_Ok then, that was painful and I really have no wish to have it repeated. It seems that the less darkness there is inside of me, the more I'll feel… maybe if I go further I'll get my memories back… that is if I even had any to begin with."_

Even though he didn't want to suffer the pain he'd just been through_, he couldn't_ _not go. To either suffer in this darkness, for maybe the rest of his existence, without knowing anything or to brave a little pain and maybe just make it out of this place._

It didn't take too long for him to make a decision. Even were he to stay he would have been increasingly bored out of his mind.

"_So I guess onward and hopefully outward, I just hope I don't regret what I'm about to do. I must have done something really bad to be here; hopefully I can accept it and really start my repentance." _With that last determined thought he moved onward, unknowingly setting in motion a chain of events that would change not only himself, but every world around him, for either good or evil.

* * *

**Betaed: 7/31/09**

**Rewritten: 8/01/09 **

**Reposted: 8/01/09**

Wow after rewriting this I have to say my style of writing has definitely changed over the last year. Comparing this chapter to some of my latest chapters makes me cringe in abhorrence.

I hope the shortness of this chapter doesn't discourage any readers, later on the chapters get quite big, than even out into reasonable sized chapters.

Please Review! I really love hearing what my readers think about the story. Comments, questions, criticism, it's all good!


	2. Chapter 2

English. French. German. Italian. Portuguese. Spanish. Japanese.

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**Bored. Ennuy****é. Gelangweilt. Alesato. Furado. Aburrido. Unzari Shiteiru.**

There were so many different names for the same damn thing. If he had had a head, and that head had hair on top of it, he would have pulled all of it out by now.

"_Damn, how much longer is this going to take?" _After he had decided to continue onward with his journey, he'd figured it wouldn't take too long before something happened. After his emotions had returned he'd expected that his memoires would only have been a stone's throw away. How wrong he had been.

"_It seems like centuries have passed and the darkness still seems so, well, dark I guess. Damn drifting like this must have affected my superior I.Q. I can't believe-wait how would I know if my I.Q. was superior?" _He stopped thinking for a total of five seconds before his mind kicked back into action,

"_Oh my- this is must be it! I must be getting my memories back. Think, other than knowing my intelligence is really eminent what else do I remember?"_

But as hard as he tired he couldn't remember anything else, which frustrated him to no end.

"_Well that sucks, still, at least it seems I'm getting somewhere, and, now that I think about it the darkness seems so much more subdued than it was before. Hmm, I wonder what that means exactly?" _

While he was musing on this, just to help pass the time with, he failed to notice the odd ringing noise that suddenly surrounded him.

After thinking about his problem for a while, which, with his newly realized advanced mind, he'd had an interesting time dissecting, he felt something that made his newfound interest in problem solving take a back seat.

"_What the hell was that? …I've felt that before, I know I have. What could it be?" _

It happened again and again, until he could no longer think. At least nothing that would have made any sense.

"_Ahhhh! What is this?! I-Ahhhh it hurts! Wait it hurts? Yes! That's it, it hurts. And if something hurts then it's… pain?" _

He only had a moment to gloat with his newfound knowledge before the pain started again. It was only then that he noticed the odd ringing.

"_Argh! What is that? More pain? Please stop, it hurts so much… Ahhhhhhh!"_

After what seemed like an eternity of mind numbing agony and maddening ringing, he finally noticed that the dark looked… well it looked more of a lighter dark, if such a thing was possible. It no longer touched him with its clotting ink—like darkness, it now seemed somehow tamer; it caressed his being, smoothing the hurt that the pain had caused. Slowly the pain started to fade away, leaving a kind of dull ache, but sadly the ringing still persisted.

He hoped that would be the end of the pain, but had a slight suspicion that it was only the calm before the storm.

"_Oh please let it end soon, I'm going to lose what's left of my sanity if this darkness doesn't end soon."_

Right after that particular thought, he noticed something different in his surroundings, something that was not darkness, something… bright?

It seemed to be ahead of him, it was hard to tell with him having no body and everything being the same black darkness. Except, it seemed, for that one small part.

"_Should I go towards it? It could be a trap- wait, why would I assume it would be a trap? Ah I don't care anymore I just want to know who I am and to leave this thrice-damn place behind!"_

With that thought in mind he determinedly moved onward through the murkiness.

Suddenly, a single image flashed. It was a… _"Strawberry Cheesecake?"_

Suddenly, along with the image, came several powerful emotions.

_**Rage, sadness, exasperation, contentment, and…affection?**_

"_What the hell?! Why would a pastry be my first memory and to have so many positive yet negative emotions with it? I wonder why I would feel all those emotions for a piece of concentrated sugar. Maybe it's not the cake itself but something else?"_

He was getting very tired, not to mention a little pissed off. He wished that all of his memories would just come back at once instead of coming one at a time.

"**If that is what you believe you want then so be it." **

A deep voice sounded around him.

The ringing suddenly got much louder.

"_What? Who the hell just said-AAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!"_

Suddenly all of his memories came rushing back, all at once, just crashing into him. The pain of being torn apart and put back together repeatedly. Everything seemed to fly past so quickly that he didn't have the time or the mental capabilities to deal with it all. It was inconceivably excruciating, and it seemed like it would never end.

After what seemed like a ceaseless cycle of being ripped to shreds and then being messily put back into place, it finally ended.

"_I know… I know who I am… I'm… my name is…"_

"**Yes, I believe we have much to discuss… Kira."**

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**Betaed: 7/31/09**

**Rewritten: 8/02/09**

**Reposted: 8/04/09**

Thank you everyone who had reviewed! Wow these beta chapters are a lot shorter then the originals-but it's much nicer to read though.

Don't forget to review and comment! Criticism and praise are both welcome and appreciated.


	3. Chapter 3

This chapter is dedicated to Black-Dranzer-1119.

Thank you VirtualDraconium for being my beta! You're awesome. XD

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The first thing that he-he now knew his name had been Kira- noticed was the sudden clarity that surrounded him. The rush of memories seemed to finally slow down from the intense speed with which they had hit him. After a while, they finally came to a standstill. Even so, the ringing noise, which had intensified as the memories had swiftly overtaken him, didn't stop.

Though it seemed that, even with all of his memories back, he was still detached from them; as if they were someone else's memories and he was only able to look at them albeit painfully. The swirl of emotions, which had accompanied the memory of the sugary cake, didn't come with them. It was like something was holding all of it back. Blocking the emotions from overtaking him completely; he knew if he were to experience all of the emotions at the same time as the memories, he would most likely shut down permanently.

"_What-what am I doing here? Aren't I dead? Yes… I did die, didn't I? … This must be Mu… Yes, that would make sense, nothingness… no sense of self either. That was the rule wasn't it? But wait; what's the last thing I remember? … I remember going to a warehouse… with the rest of the task force, yes Aizawa, stupid man always thinking in the box never outside it. Ide, Mogi, and-Matsuda… ahh, that's right, that brainless dimwit shot me! Ungrateful bastard! Then … Near! That-! I hate that little bitch! Stupid revolting albino L wannabe! Urgh, I got to get it together. I can rant about that little freak later, now what happened after I got shot…? Ryuk… talking to me, saying that it was my time… that I satisfied his boredom, that right-he took his pen and then… he wrote my name down… in that godforsaken DEATHNOTE!! Ah yes that's right! I'm Kira, God of the New Wor- wait that's not right… Is that who I really am now? … No, that's not right at all, at least not anymore… that's to say… I'm no God…"_

"_**Kukukuku good job Kira, it's about time you realized this and so soon too. Thanks to you I've would've won a sizable amount from the old betting pool. No one else but myself, Nu and Justin believed that you would ever come to that conclusion so soon after regaining your sense of self. Well, most of it at least."**_

The voice seemed to surround him from all angles, thunderously beating down onto him.

"_Damn that's so loud, I feel like I'm going to implode. Whoever that is could you please take it down a few notches before anything else? And what the hell do you mean betting pool?"_

"_**Right sorry, it's been so long since I talked to a lesser being, I forgot how fragile humans were. Let's move to a more comfortable spot shall we? Before I decide to tell you just what I'm going to do about you."**_

Suddenly, before Kira had time to respond to the voice's rather rude comments and the avoidance of his question, he felt a firm tug and a jolt of severe pain.

"_Arrrgggggghhhhhhhhhhh-"_

Kira blacked out.

---

Kira awoke with a silent start.

The very first thing that he noticed was that the darkness still surrounded him.

'_Damn I'm still there? I thought we were moving-'_

It only took him about three seconds to realize the darkness was not because he was still in Mu. No, it was dark because his eyes were closed.

'_Eyes… If I have eyes, that must mean I have a body… oh god… I have a body… Wait, now's not the time to get emotional, maybe if I get time to myself then I'll be able to break down but not now… I just need to concentrate on what's going on right now. Ah, I feel like something is watching me.'_

Before opening his eyes, and thus alerting whoever was watching him to the fact that he had woken up, he took stock of his surroundings. He was lying on his back on a hard uneven surface, maybe dirt? Its coarseness seemed to agree with that prospect.

The second thing he noticed was that the ringing had stopped. Paranoia, however, stopped him from relaxing, though the silence was a pleasant change from the loud annoying sound.

'_Ok, before checking out the rest of my surroundings, let's just check myself first, my body… damn, got to get a hold of myself. Ok, let's see… head check, two arms check, two legs check, two eyes check, nose check, mouth check, ears check, two wings check… wait… WINGS?!'_

Kira couldn't stop himself from opening his eyes in shock and gasping out loud in disbelief.

"_**Kukuku, I was wondering how long you were going to lie there faking. So, you noticed your new appendages. Kukuku, I had forgotten how entertaining humans were. You especially, Kira, are most fascinating."**_

Kira finally moved his eyes which were looking at the ground in shock. He looked up, and saw who'd been speaking to him all this time. He couldn't stop another gasp from escaping at the sight in front of him.

He spoke one word, His first word in who knows how many years. It was a question and a statement.

"L…?"

---

Sitting on a broken and brittle throne, seemingly made from some type of black stone and a reddish unidentifiable form of metal, was a familiar figure.

A slim figure in tattered and stained blue jeans, blackened feet with unusually long toes, a long sleeved shirt, once white now a sallow shade of yellow and stained blackish-red with a indefinable substance, ashen, no, completely colorless skin, wild untamed black hair, and _red_ eyes?

'_No wait, that's not L.'_

"_**You're right I'm not L, but I do bare an uncanny resemblance to him don't I? Or maybe he resembles me? Kukuku"**_

"Who are you?"

Kira started to cough harshly; apparently speaking out loud wasn't such a good idea.

"_**Ah yes, I imagine your throat must be dry, I can only guess that after a millennium or so of disuse I bet that anyone's throat would be sore. As to who I am, well take a wild guess. This is not my real appearance either, but I find I like this humanoid figure much more then my incorporeal form, and this way we can talk a lot easier." **_

Kira froze in mid cough.

"A Millennium!!!" The coughing persisted, but much more harshly.

"_**Ah yes, that's a long time to you humans isn't it? Though you're not much of a human now hmm? Though, it could be debated that you'd lost your humanity long before you yourself died."**_

The reminder that he was somewhat physically different now finally stopped the coughing.

Kira tried to look over his shoulder to see exactly what the things on his back _were_, but it seemed that his hair was blocking his view of, well, everything. It covered the majority of his face as well.

He grabbed a handful of shaggy auburn hair only to realize it was a lot longer then he'd first thought. His hair went at least all the way to his waist. Also his hands… they were longer, thinner, and his nails… were claws?!

Kira decided that he really needed to fully see himself. Slowly getting to his knees, he tried to get to his feet. It was hard considering how weak he felt, but he was determined to stand, not only to fully examine himself, but so as not to appear weaker than the L look-alike, who was just watching this all silently and expressionlessly.

Finally, after what seemed like hours had passed by, he was finally on both of his feet, somewhat wobbly but he quickly covered that. It was strange though, he felt weighed down, as if something were dragging on him, so even though he was standing, he had to hunch his shoulders a little. It irritated him; he was all about standing straight and tall and perfect. To have to hunch over, even a little, was just degrading.

He looked at the figure on the throne.

'_God, he even sits like him. That just pisses me off. Who is he? Wait, I was in Mu, where I should, supposedly, have resided for eternity, never to get out, I shouldn't even have had any sort of consciousness there, but I remember being able to think; hell I even decided that I was in that godforsaken place as punishment. Heh, must have been my unconscious guilt at my actions as Kira. But this guy just takes me out of that hellhole like it was nothing… ah shit.'_

"You're the Shinigami King aren't you?"

"_**Ah, I was wondering how long it would take you, though I understand you might be a bit disoriented. Being in Mu is no small thing. It took me forever just to find most of you, and even then I was only able to find the most basic essence of yourself. It took me centuries to find enough of your soul to put you back together enough for you to be able to think somewhat rationally. After that I just had to wait, heh, you did the rest of the work. Even without memories or emotions, which were dulled down to almost nothing, you still found the way out. But I guess I should have expected that from the Great Kira huh? Kukukukukuku" **_

Kira's head was spinning, trying to take in all of the Shinigami King's words at once; he started to sort through them slowly. When the King had finally finished laughing he decided just to ask the question that had been burning inside him since he had woken up.

"Why did you take me out of Mu?"

The Shinigami King tried to look thoughtful and tilted his head back as though he were thinking about the question. The small smirk on his face disputed that though. He lifted his left hand and started to nibble on his thumb. It was then that Kira realized that the King's mouth was filled with razor sharp teeth, evidenced by the blackish red blood that oozed down from his hand onto the already reddened shirt sleeve.

Kira came to a realization.

'_He's just toying with me.' _That enraged Kira like nothing else.

Then the King said something that almost made Kira go off the deep end.

"_**Well, I guess I was just bored."**_

_**---**_

It took a few deep mediated breaths before Kira calmed down enough not to lunge at the King in rage.

"You know, you're the second Shinigami to tell me that just before altering my life."

"_**Kukukuku, ah yes Ryuk. One of my more favored children, although quite the rule bender."**_

'_Ya, and a big pain in my ass, that damn apple loving freak of a shinigami! All he was ever concerned about were his damn apples and satisfying his boredom!'_

"Yes, Ryuk. How is he nowadays? Bored would be my guess."

Kira had now calmed down enough to start to think rationally again.

"_**Ah yes, about that…well I guess you wouldn't know, with being in Mu and all."**_

Kira was starting to get really annoyed with the King's amused vagueness.

"What do you mean?" He asked through clenched teeth.

The Shinigami King smirked before standing up on his throne.

Kira was taken aback; while the King had previously been in L's signature hunched over form, standing up he towered over Kira by several feet. And while standing up the differences between the King and L were now more apparent.

While L was wiry in the sense of a swimmer's or a runner's body, being only slightly unnourished, the King's body was skin stretched over bone, with no sign that blood flowed beneath its surface. It was like colorless skeletal paper on a rigid frame. Both L's and Kira's height had been around the same; a good five feet and eight inches, the King though seemed to be around eight to nine feet tall. The arms were inhumanly long, just like Ryuk's and Rem's had been. The stains on the King's clothing were now more visible and thus identifiable. Blood; old and new. In various stages of congealing.

Kira thought he was going to be sick, but he continued his observation, if only to get it done quicker. He also felt something he hadn't felt in a long time. Not since his own ending. Fear.

The King's face, while it did share some of the same characteristics as L's, it was only the most basic of similarities. While L's face had been soft and creamy looking, the King's face was hard and sharp. And the eyes, instead of being a vacant yet oddly warm blackish grey, they were red, the color of freshly spilled blood. And while L's eyes had been underlined with dark shadows giving him an almost panda like look; on the King, the black outlining around the scarlet eyes gave the impression of the pits of hell.

"_**Have you finished with your ogling now?"**_

The King chuckled when Kira flushed with embarrassment and anger.

"_**Kukukuku, so much fun, now I understand what Ryuk meant; you are most entertaining Kira. There are also other reasons I have brought you back **_**other**_** than being bored you know. "**_

Kira gave let out a small growl.

"_**Alright, alright, calm down, its not like we don't have time to just chat, you and me being the only two beings left in existence."**_

Kira froze and stared at the King in disbelief.

"What?!"

"_**Yes, it seems that humans didn't really have that much of a survival instinct, they much more preferred to kill everyone and everything around them in petty squabbles over stupid ideals."**_

"Wha-what happened?" Kira was in a daze. It all felt so unreal, for only himself and apparently the King of Death to be the only beings still alive… Ok, well he himself wasn't really _alive_, at least, he didn't think so, not after having died and left to drift in permanent limbo, which he guessed wasn't so permanent, if the King could take him out of it, even if, according to the King, it had taken a long time. And he didn't think the King himself could count as being alive either. Kira decided to leave off the technicalities of the situation and wait for the King to answer his question.

"_**Ok, let's see…it was around 9,000 to 10,000 years ago, can't quite remember exactly, everything was going as it normally was, you know war, crime, birth, death, etc, etc. It was about two or three decades after your death I believe. And yes crime and murder were still common, you didn't change much except give birth to more religious fanatics. Actually you did change a lot, just not how you wanted to. You see those Kira fanatics that you had help create, believed that you had stopped judging and killing criminals because you thought the world was so corrupt that it wasn't worth saving. So they finally did what they believed you would be pleased and proud of. They destroyed the world, thus cleaning it of its corruption."**_

Kira just stood there, head down, hair covering his face, hiding what he was thinking and feeling, his body was as still as a statue, not moving save for breathing in quick, short pants.Finally, after a while, he moved, feeling as though his body was going to break if he moved too quickly he looked up into the face of the King. His face so still it could have been made out of marble. Finally, he spoke.

"How?"

"_**With a surprising amount of ease actually. The Kira worshipers numbers were in the thousands, they lived in every country; when they decided to put their plans for world destruction into action nobody could stop them. They stormed government buildings, towns, villages and cities, destroying everything and everyone everywhere. All forms of communications and security vanished. No one was able to contact help from other countries because everyone else was in the same situation. For a few short years humanity tried to adapt. They tried to live off the earth like they did so many years ago. Sadly, the fanatics decided that things weren't going quickly enough so they raided all of the abandoned government facilities and labs; they then launched every single nuclear and bio-weapon in every country instantaneously. Everything died. Humans, mammals, fish, birds, plants, hell even the cockroaches died. The Earth resembled the Shinigami world almost completely. The only difference between them was that there were still living beings, the shinigami, in my world. But that didn't last long. My children needed the lifespan of humans to live, and with no humans they could not survive long. I had to watch as one by one my children died, turned back into the dust that they were created from. I might be a cruel and impassive father, but I did care for them. They did not deserve that fate, as the earth did not deserve its ultimate fate either. And to think, all this happened because one bored child with a god-complex picked up something not of his world and meddled with things he should not have meddled with."**_

Kira was quiet throughout the speech; though he couldn't help but flinch at the end. His face was once again hidden behind his hair. He felt something on his face and reached up to brush it away. His hand encountered wetness. Shocked, he looked at his hand, clear liquid covered it; tears. He was crying.

Once he realized that he was crying, it was like a dam broke. Wrenching sobs racked his body, making him bend in half. He didn't know exactly why he was crying, or who he was crying for. The world; for all those innocence lives that were lost because of his need to play god, for himself; for his own lost innocence. For so much pain and suffering that he was directly responsible for. So much to cry about yet he still was confused about the reasons for his own tears.

He knew that when he'd been living as Kira he wouldn't have acted this way. He'd forgotten how to cry a long time ago. The last time he'd truly shed a few tears had been after L's funeral, when he was left alone there, and then only because he had felt he had lost someone who could have matched him in intelligence. It had only lasted a few seconds, and only one or two tears had been shed before he had started to laugh manically at his victory. He was strangely glad he could truly cry now.

"_**Yes… cry, Kira… for their sakes and for your own… Yes, maybe its not too late after all."**_

Kira had forgotten about the Shinigami King. Surprisingly enough he was not embarrassed by his display of emotion. He felt cleaner for it somehow.

"_**It's the first step. Heh, you never fail to surprise, do you Kira? Or should I call you Raito? I always found that ironic. That one of the most corrupt human beings in existence was named Light. Heh. Though I guess you'd respond to both names, being both beings at once; yet **_**here**_** you are not one or the other completely. Heh, how entertaining."**_

Kira finally got his tears under control. He ignored the King's comments, they didn't need nor deserve a response. He straightened up, at least, as much as he could. That was starting to annoy him. He tried to look at his back again.

"_**Ah yes, you are probably wondering about your appearance, how about a mirror? I know you will have questions and I will answer them after you see for yourself what you have become. It will make things easier if you see it yourself first than for me to explain it. "**_

With that said, the King of Death waved his hand and suddenly Kira was completely surrounded by eight foot tall mirrors. He couldn't see the King any more, but once he caught sight of his reflection the King was the last thing on his mind.

Shinigami. That was the first thought that came to his mind once he saw the being in the mirror. It only took a few seconds to realize that it was his own reflection he was staring at.

To start with, his hair was even more haggard then he'd first thought. It hung slightly past his ass and was all about the same length except for the hair around his face, which only went as far as the base of his neck like a small curtain framing his face. The ends were choppy and uneven; it was also no longer silky like it used to be but coarse and dry. His skin was a pasty milky color, the veins almost invisible underneath. His ears were a little bit more pointed than they had been in life. His hands were long and bony, ending with pointed claws; he had no doubt that he could tear through flesh if he wanted to. He opened his vivid ruby lips to look at his teeth; sharp carnivorous teeth filled his mouth, only a few teeth right at the back seemed to be unpointed. His tongue was a little narrower than it had been before, but not too much.

His eyes… oh god. They were no longer the warm chocolate brown that he'd had in life. No, now they were the same as the King's. Blood. Crimson red covered his eyes. His pupils were so small they might as well not be there at all.

He closed his accursed eyes for a minute before continuing his assessment. His clothing was also different. He could almost see the irony of the assembly. An undone white ragged and torn straightjacket covered his top half, the buckles which would have strapped his arms to his chest laid by his sides. The sleeves covered his hands when he stood up, which he hadn't noticed earlier;

He shook his head; he just hadn't been paying attention, though the lapse could be excused with coming back from the dead and then finding out that everyone else is deceased. Yep, what he'd been wearing was not one of his top priorities when he'd woken up.

The pants he was wearing were also white; they were flowing and also in tatters, mostly at the bottom hems. His feet were in once white slippers that had blackened from the dirt he was standing on. After he'd finished the once over, he took a closer examination. There were two obviously misplaced wings on his back. They looked white at first glance, but a closer examination proved them to be many different shades of grey. They reminded him of Ryuk's wings, but bigger. They had tears and holes in them like all shinigami wings seemed to have. Even though he had all these shinigami characteristics he still looked mostly human. Albeit, a weird one.

Kira had had enough.

"Ok, what the fuck am I?!"

The mirrors vanished. Kira couldn't stop a small gasp of shock from escaping when he found the Shinigami King right in front of him, close enough to touch.

"_**You are one of my children now. Well you're more like hybrid really. You are about 59 percent human and 41 percent shinigami. I kept you relatively more human because things will be easier that way, not to mention more interesting."**_

"What do you mean easier? For what? And what do you mean more interesting?! Jeez, you really are related to Ryuk!"

The Shinigami King cackled. Such a fascinating child this Kira was.

"_**Well I thought it would make it a lot easier for you, and for your task."**_

"What task? What are you talking about? Just tell me instead of being vague."

The Shinigami King grinned a grin that even unnerved Kira.

"_**Well, your deliverance of course. Isn't that why you wanted your memories back? To ask for forgiveness? Well, I will give you that opportunity; I will give you your second chance to make things right. Atone Kira, and Repent. And then I will give you your Redemption."**_

_**---**_

**Betaed: 8/5/09**

**Rewritten: 8/16/09**

**Reposted: 8/16/09**

**Please Remember To Review!**


	4. Chapter 4

"R-Redemption?"

Kira couldn't have been more shocked if he'd been told that L was his and Misa's future love child. Ok, maybe not _that_ shocked, but still.

"_**Yes Kira, I brought you out of Mu to give you a second chance. And you're not the only one getting a second chance; everyone else who died before their time will hopefully get one as well."**_

It took Kira a few minutes to get over the shock of hearing this. Then the full implications of this chance hit him. He could go back… back home. True happiness filled him and he basked in that feeling for a few seconds. But a nagging thought pressed through the feeling, cutting it short.

"What, exactly, do you mean by a second chance? How is that even possible?"

The King just shook his head and raised his hand in a follow me gesture. Kira, while annoyed that he was being ignored and beckoned like some kind of dog, decided to do as he was told. The King seemed willing to give him this second chance. He would do almost anything for that possibility.

'_Why would I want a second chance though? Wanting a second chance would mean that I did something wrong the first time… That can't be right, can it? I just wanted to make the world safer for everyone; it was dirty and it needed to be cleaned up… I mean, people were getting away with almost anything! Murder, theft, adultery, kidnapping, child mutilation, rape, the list goes on and on. It was pure evil, and I only wanted to help… No, I may have _meant_ to help in the beginning… but I lost sight of that, didn't I? I wanted to be a god so badly… Why? Why did I want to become that? It's like in the English bible… Lucifer, the Angel of Light, God's favored angel, saw the corruption in humanity and decided to destroy the evil he could see. He defied the god he loved to do what he thought was right, and became a god himself, or, more accurately, the devil… _

_Oh god, that's what I've done isn't it? I became the devil when I wanted to become the god of the new world; the power I had possessed… it just seemed to take control… I… my god! All those people! I killed all of them. I think I'm going to be sick… Oh god… L… Ryuuzaki… I killed you, my best friend, because even though we were enemies you really were my only equal… You may not have died by my hands but I was responsible for your death… I'm so sorry; if I could I would beg for your forgiveness. Wait that's right! I can ask for forgiveness! My second chance! I _will_ set things right!'_

Even while Kira was thinking this, he couldn't help the small bit of doubt that clouded his mind.

'_But still, was I really wrong? The world is-was- a rotten place. Now that I know what's going to happen… maybe I can change it and still be Kira… Wait, is that what I really want? I don't know anymore. Damn, it feels like there are two of me inside, continuously battling for control. On one hand I still believe that the world is rotten and needs to be cleaned up, but do I have to resort to mass murder? Maybe this time I can help the world without selling my soul… Maybe… but the thing is; will I do it? Am I strong enough to resist the power of the Death Note?'_

Kira was so confused. He didn't have a clue to what he wanted anymore. There were only two things he was certain about. One, he no longer wanted to be god, he realized that it was a stupid dream and quite unrealistic. Two, he did not want L dead, even though it might mean Kira's capture, well it depends on when the King decides to take him back. Would it be before or after he touched the Death Note? Would he have his memories? He had so many questions he wanted to ask, but was wary of asking in case the King changed his mind about taking him back and just stuck him in Mu again.

Kira shivered, he _never_ wanted to go back to that place. That darkness… it had been worse than any type of hell imaginable.

"_**If you're done with angsting and analyzing your disgraceful past; we have arrived."**_

They had had been walking for some time, in a direct path through the abandoned desert that made up the shinigami world. The King was walking a few feet in front of him, interestingly enough not in an L like fashion; instead of scuffling forward with his back hunched over, the King was walking with his back straight up and taking big long strides. It just drove home that no matter the small similarities, the King and L were two totally different people.

Kira just shot the King an irate look and looked around at where they were. He decided that he would figure out what he was going to do when the time came. He was startled to see that while he'd been deep in thought, they'd arrived in an entirely different landscape.

Instead of the endless desert that seemed to make up the shinigami world, they were in a cavernous room, standing near the edge of a black hole in the ground. On closer inspection it seemed to be filled with a sluggish murky liquid. The area around them was made up of an ancient stone. Written all over the walls and floor was some form of archaic language; all sorts of hieroglyphs and other symbolic writing covered every available surface.

The King, seemingly contented to ignore Kira at the moment, walked to one of the walls and appeared to be reading it.

Kira, while yet again annoyed at being ignored, was glad to be able to explore the odd room by himself. Choosing to leave the pool alone he moved to one of the walls.

After a few minutes of blankly staring at the carvings he gave a startled gasp. The previously incomprehensible language had started to transform into Japanese, allowing him to read it.

'_Wh-what the hell?!'_

"_**Ah, so it changed for you did it? How very interesting. She usually doesn't take a liking to strangers. You really **_**are**_** special, aren't you Kira? Kukukuku."**_

Kira got over the shock of seeing engraved writing changing into a whole other language. He looked over at the King in confusion. The King was still at the other end of the room smirking in a knowing fashion.

"What do you mean '_she'_? I thought you said we were the only beings left alive? And how did the hieroglyphs change like that?" To say that Kira was in a state of bewilderment was an understatement.

"_**Heh, you'll see soon enough. Why don't you try reading some, all around you is the history of the universe, from the birth and death of every known and unknown organism, to all the secrets of the gods and mystics are written here. Mind you, you can only read what She wants you to."**_

With that said, the King turned back round and continued reading the wall he was standing in front of.

Still mystified by what the King had said, Kira let it go again, and also turned back to the wall in front of him. But instead of reading the secrets of the universe, he took another look at his inner psyche.

'_Hmm, it seems I _am_ going soft. Before I would have demanded answers, Shinigami King or no Shinigami King. Also, the Kira I was before would be looking for the secrets of world domination on these walls. I wonder what's wrong with me? It's like there's only half of me here… Or maybe its two halves of different wholes? Isn't that what the King said earlier? That he could only find most of me? Instead of being entirely Kira or Raito, maybe I'm a mixture of both? Wait, where are all these thoughts coming from?'_

Kira looked up from where his eyes had been vacantly staring at the floor. He took a closer look at the wall in front of him. His eyes narrowed as he started to read, only to widen in alarm and disbelief. He stumbled a half a step backwards, uncertain as to how he should take this.

Had his thoughts had influenced the writing? …or maybe it was the writing that had influenced his thoughts… Either way his earlier musings and his most recent thoughts were written on the wall in front of him.

He was suddenly aware of an immense presence right behind him.

Kira closed his eyes slowly and opened them. Moving somewhat wearily, he slowly turned around.

"What-"

He was neither ready nor prepared for the intensity of his feelings at that moment.

**Panic, foreboding, anxiety, terror, fright,** **grief, regret…** then… **wonder, awe, bliss, delight, happiness, pleasure, joy, contentment.**

She was magnificent and majestic. She was happiness and sorrow, pleasure and pain, beauty and hideousness, war and peace, death and rebirth. She was so many of these things and much more.

To Kira's eyes she took the form of a young girl. With hair as pure white as untouched snow flowing down her back to the floor, unbound and free. Somewhat small in stature, she only reached as high as his waist. An undecorated sleeveless white dress covered her body down to her knees, and she wore no shoes. Her skin glowed and her face gave the impression of eternal youth; her face, at the moment, set in weary amusement. Probably at the expression that Kira didn't doubt was on his face. Her eyes were completely white. No pupils or anything. It might have given the impression that she was blind, except for a certain watchfulness that seemed to radiate from them.

Kira knew precisely who this child was. But still he had to make sure.

"G-God?"

---

'God' just smiled sadly and gave a small shake of her tiny head.

Now Kira was confused, he _knew_ that the being in front of him was a god in the guise of a little girl, but she'd shaken her head in a way that suggested that he was only half-right.

"_**Hehe, you really are special aren't you. Not only did she let you into herself she has even shown you her more corporeal form."**_

Kira jumped. It seemed that while he'd been staring at the little girl in front of him, the King had silently made his way over from where he'd been, on the other side of the room, to stand right beside him.

Kira turned to the King, who'd been watching him with an amused expression and started demanding answers.

"What do you mean 'into herself'? She _is_ a god though, isn't She? I can feel it… this warmth, belonging… isn't this what a god is suppose to be like?" Kira wanted answers and he wanted them now.

While Kira tried to get some answers from the King, the little god continued to smile sadly at Kira. Unnerving him completely; a thought occurred to him… something the King had said when they'd first met.

"I thought you said that you and me were the last two beings alive? Now there seems to be three of us." He faced the King with an expression that said that if the King didn't give an explanation right now, he would not be held accountable for his actions.

"_**Hehe, no need to get mad. I **_**was**_** telling you the truth, well kind of anyway. You see, you and me are the only beings left **_**alive**_**. She is no longer living. At least not in the sense that you and I believe in. She was once a god. A Mother to all living creatures. She, Giver of Life and Death. She is, I believe, what you humans called Mother Nature. Hehe, fitting really. But once the Earth was dead she could no longer sustain her own life force and slowly died herself. Well kind of, its really hard to kill a god, especially one as powerful as her. Even when her purpose for existence had gone, she still couldn't cease to exist. That's where I came in. While we may not have entirely gotten along, what with me using her children's lifespans to feed my own children, I helped her achieve her end in a way."**_

The King stopped in mid-explanation when the little girl-god came over to where he and Kira were standing.

She stared at both of them with such a deeply mournful look, that before Kira knew what he was doing he had gotten down on his knees and embraced her.

He dimly heard the sharp intake of breath from the King but dismissed it from his mind. What was important right now was the god like child that was currently wrapped in his arms.

Kira had never been fond of close contact; while he'd been alive he had merely tolerated it for sake of normalcy. It had always seemed just too intimate of an action.

But seeing the small god looking at him as if she were on the brink of crying was too much, even for him.

"I'm so sorry… I don't know if you can, will, ever forgive me. I just wanted to help…I'm so very sorry…"

Kira didn't really know what to say to a god he had unwittingly caused the death of. He just… just wanted to wipe away the sadness that seemed to consume her.

He was startled when he felt two small arms wrap around him and hold on just as tightly as he was.

Choking back the tears that were threatening to come back, he looked at the King.

He was startled again when he saw the King. He had such a look of barely contained merriment on his face that was more than slightly disturbing.

Instead of continuing to look at the expression the King was sporting, he looked instead at the little child god in his arms. Her head was buried against his chest, so he was unable to see her face.

After a few more moments of basking in the hug, an act that was odd in itself for him to be doing though he ignored that fact, the small god pulled back, just enough to look him in the face.

Her expression was blank, even though her eyes seemed to be piercing right through him; it was as if she were judging him, seeing if he deserved any type of repentance.

After what seemed to be an eternity, throughout which Kira thought he was going to go insane, she finally seemed to come to a decision.

It was incredibly beautiful, the smile of a god.

---

"_**Well, I guess I should finish my story, huh?"**_

Kira looked up at the Shinigami King who seemed a tad unsure of himself. Not that he could blame him, a lot of things were unsettling right now.

He was still on the ground with the little god in his arms, but had moved around so that he was sitting with his back against the wall for more comfort; the tiny god was snuggling into Kira's lap seemingly very comfortable there.

"I believe that would be wise."

"_**Ok ok, no need to get snippy with me. Hmm, now where did I leave off? Oh ya, I helped the little lady achieve death, or as close as I could at the time. She had to become something else entirely."**_

Kira was almost afraid to ask but pushed any lingering doubts away. He looked at the girl in his arms, who was currently playing with the straps and buckles of his straight-jacket. She seemed to genuinely enjoy them and Kira didn't have the heart to stop her.

"What did you do to her? What did she have to become?"

The Shinigami King just gave a creepy but sad smile, crouched down in a manner eerily similar to L, and looked at the god for a second before turning to Kira.

"_**She became a memory."**_

"Wh-What!"

Kira sat up straight from the slouch he'd adopted to keep the little god more comfortable. The tiny god seemed to sense his distress and stopped playing with his shirt; she then turned slightly and started to cuddle him.

'_Cuddle?! Kira does not cuddle! What the hell has happened to me? God, much more of this… this niceness and I might as well say I was secretly in love with Ryuzaki and was pining for his respect and love and- WHAT THE HELL AM I THINKING!!' _

Kira gave a half-choke on his train of thought.

He decided to abandon this thought process and never touch it again. He tried to get back to the matter at hand.

"How is she a memory?"

"_**Ah that was no small feat. You see this entire room is her memory, the last piece of her essence; I bound her life force into this enclosed area. All of these carvings are her thoughts or the thoughts and actions of every single creature to ever exist. To do this I also had to bind myself to her. While I can leave this room for a small amount of time she can not leave at all. We have been connected in such a way that if one of us were to cease to exist then the other would immediately also cease to exist. We have been like this for so many years now I've lost count. We finally decided on a plan though, a way to end this pointless endless existence and hopefully get a second opportunity. That's where you come in."**_

"What do you mean?"

"_**Well, you kind of set all this in motion. And also, I've got to say, you didn't really deserve your fate. My Death Notes are not meant for human hands, they will corrupt any and all who touch it, except my shinigami. I'm not saying that it changed you completely into another being, but it did take away any human sentiments that you may have had. It seemed to have brought out the inner darkness that seems to inhabit all of you lesser beings. Me and the little Mother decided we would do all we could to change the hand fate had dealt. And that's where you come in Kira."**_

The King stopped talking, as if he were uncertain how to continue. Finally, after a minute or two, he seemed to come to a decision and continued.

"_**You Kira, who has experienced both the good and evil of humanity. You were one of the mother's most gifted children and you strived to use that brilliant mind of yours for justice. You were a good person Kira, and I'm sorry my Death Note almost destroyed that. When you lost your memory of the Death Note for the first time during your imprisonment, you regained the humanity that the Death Note stole from you. You genuinely wanted to catch Kira; you wanted to destroy the power that was killing millions of people, people who did not deserve to die, at least not at that time. Everything has a set order, and when you became Kira you destroyed that order. It caused great chaos and distress for all of the gods and higher beings."**_

"G-Gods?"

"_**Oh yes, there were many gods; Creators and Destroyers of life. I myself am more of a Destroyer than a Creator, just like the little Mother is more of a Creator than a Destroyer of life. I may have given life to my shinigami children but their purpose was to destroy. Whereas you humans were made to give life. You, who were able to embrace each other and create new life; my own children were barren, I could not give them the gift that the little Mother was able to bestow onto you and all Earth's races. It was sad that it seemed that gift was taken for granted a lot. There were a lot more Destroyer gods than there were Creators. When the Earth was destroyed it rewrote many of our destinies. All of the Destroyers, except for myself, were wiped out almost immediately, and the Creators soon followed. I and the little Mother were powerful enough that we could not cease to exist along with our brothers and sisters; you are the one who will change this Kira. You can change our fate and your own. I only hope you are up to the challenge."**_

Kira never knew that he could feel so awful. He almost wished for his emotions to go back into the void of Mu, but the larger part of him embraced the feeling that flowed through him; while it felt terrible, at least it was an emotion. He could remember that while he'd been Kira on Earth, his emotions had been next to nonexistent. To realize that he had not only destroyed the Earth, but was also responsible for the death of gods… gods just like the child-god here… it hurt, a lot.

Kira was starting to realize what the King was getting at. Though he suspected that the Shinigami King was stalling for time telling him all this. It was like-

"How am I going to go back into time? What is the price?" Kira suspected, but he hoped that he was wrong. Kira knew there had to be a price. There always was.

The King just sighed and got up from the crouch he'd adopted while he'd been talking. He went over to Kira and picked up the little god from his lap, then walked towards the black pool that occupied the middle of the room. He stopped at the edge of the pool and looked back at Kira, giving his head a shake to indicate that he wanted Kira to come over too.

While Kira was walking over, the King had set the little god down onto her feet. She had adopted a look of such sincerity and calmness that he thought that maybe he was wrong about the way back.

That thought changed again when he looked at the Shinigami King's expression. Fear, insecurity, determination, so many different emotions flew by on the King's face. Almost too fast to notice, but Kira had always been good at these kinds of observations; right now he wished he could remain ignorant.

"_**To change the past, and to defy fate are no small feat. A lot of energy will be needed to send you back. There are a few snags though. We will not be able to determine when you arrive. We'd hoped we could send you to before the Death Note fell to Earth, but it could also be moments before your death. We are also not sure if you will remember anything. Even though we will send you back in time, you must remember that there is a whole other you at that time. We do not know if you will become a part of that person or arrive as a wholly separate being. You are also not entirely human any more, remember? I don't know how that will affect you. One certainty is that the Death Note can no longer kill you. Just as with my other children you are under that protection. The Death Note will also not effect you like it did when you were human. It can no longer taint your human nature. Which reminds me, I have a gift for you."**_

The King pulled something out of his back pocket. After a moment it was clear what it was. A white Death Note.

"_**Now, now, don't be afraid, and yes, I can tell you are frightened by the look on your face. This is no ordinary Death Note. In truth it's not really a Death Note at all. It is the only one of its kind. The little Mother and I made it especially for you. Even if you deny it, you **_**are**_** part shinigami, and as such you have a long life force. Actually you could say you are immortal. You cannot die of old age because you will never get old. Hehe, guess you got what you wanted huh Kira? To become a god? Well, now you're a half-breed god of death. The difference with this Death Note as opposed to any other note, is that **_**this**_** Death Note does not take lives."**_

Now Kira was confused and interested. "What do you mean 'it doesn't take life'? You mean it won't kill anyone? What kind of Death Note is that?"

"_**Heheh, calm down child and I will explain. You see this is what I would like to call a Life Note. Yes, yes, I know, not very original, but hey, I call them like I see them. You see this note **_**extends**_** life. Ah, I see **_**that**_** got your attention. Well, this note doesn't have as many rules as its brother the Death Note. I decided to keep it simple and also I'm just plain lazy. But even though there are fewer rules, the ones it does have are very important. Even I don't even know what would happen should one of them be broken. I'll explain the basics and the important rules. One is that when a name is written in this note you will have to know that person's face. You will also need to specify how many years you want to add to that person's life. When a person's name is written in the Life Note they will be under its protection. They can no longer be killed by any other Death Note. The extended life will come from your own lifespan. You needn't worry though; you are, like I said, immortal now. Even if you extend the life of everyone you meet by a hundred years you wouldn't even dent your own lifespan. Also there is a rule that you must obey without question. You must never ever use a Death Note again. The shinigami of a Life Note must not write in a Death Note; to do so would utterly destroy that shinigami, and, I believe that as that shinigami, you do not want to die. Should that happen, you wouldn't even go to Mu, your soul would just be ripped to pieces and cease to exist entirely, even we gods wouldn't be able to bring you back. So I would avoid Death Notes from now on. You may touch them and even possess one, but do **_**not**_** write in one with killing intent. You can still kill someone with your bare hands if you want though, I'm not trying to turn you into a pacifist or anything like that, you just can't use a Death Note. "**_

"_**You will also be able to see other shinigami even without touching their Death Notes. They themselves will not be able to tell that you are a half shinigami unless you tell them. They will, however, be able to see that your lifespan numbers are missing. So they will either think you are a god or the walking dead. Heh, both are kind of true huh? There are a few other rules but you can read them later. There is one other important thing that the little Mother has seen fit to bestow to you; its not even really a rule, more like a gift. I'll just leave you two alone now. Use this chance wisely Kira, because it is more than we all deserve."**_

Kira had been trying to process what the King was saying, and therefore hadn't really been paying attention to the little god. When he heard that the little god had given him something, he turned his attention on her.

She had turned her face to look up at him; her position looked mildly uncomfortable so he knelt down in front of her.

She seemed to be looking into him. Again, judging to see if he was worthy enough for this, for her gift, and for this chance. Finally she gave another small smile that just seemed to warm him up from the inside, and then she did something that he was not expecting. She opened her mouth and spoke. Her voice was both very old and very young; it was beautiful and painful to hear. He listened with rapture.

"Dear one, I'm so sorry that I was unable to prevent all of this from happening to you. You were a great pleasure to create. My child, the road that you will have to walk will be at times harsh and unkind. Immortality is no gift; it is more of a curse. While we gods had each other to keep each other company, you will be bound to Earth. You will outlive all those you hold dear, to walk the Earth for all time. Loneliness is one of the cruelest punishments that a being can suffer. I will not let you feel that pain dear one. I offer you a deal. It is not easy to achieve and I am sorry for that."

She then took the Life Note from the King and held her right hand over the center of the cover. A light shone from her palm on to the note. When she removed her hand Kira immediately noticed a difference.

A symbol had appeared on the once blank cover. A circle, with a crescent moon on either side facing outwards. When she seemed satisfied with what she'd done, she held out the Life Note for him to take.

After he'd taken it he looked for a place to put it. Unfortunately the pants that he was wearing had no pockets. Just as he was about to ask where he was supposed to store it, a belt chain, similar to Ryuk's, appeared around his waist. But instead of a gothic chain decorated with skulls, it was made of a pale golden metal and had the symbol of a rising phoenix on the front. The holster for the book had another symbol on it. Unlike Ryuk's, which had had a skull on the front and a cross with a smaller skull on the book-holster, Kira's holding place resembled an Egyptian Ankh.

After putting it away, he looked at her in confusion.

"The symbols show who you are. You are a rebirth. A phoenix rising from the ashes of your past sins. The Ankh also shows that you are rebirthing, starting a second chance, and your immortality. The symbol on the book is one of mine. A symbol of a pagan goddess. It is my blessing for you and the one you choose. You see, my gift is the gift of immortality to another. One who will spend the rest of eternity with you. One who you love and who returns that love; though achieving this will be dangerous. You must first find this special person, and then you must realize your feelings for this person and accept them for who they are; and then, they must fall in love with you."

She gazed down at her feet for a moment, then looked up into Kira's eyes with an almost pitying expression.

"That's the easy part, the next part, the more difficult part, is that they have to know _everything_ about you _and_ forgive you for being Kira. Yes, I do mean they must know everything; they must know about your previous life, all of your past deeds, about the past-future destruction of earth, and even that you are a hybrid shinigami. Everything. You may even tell them about us. They must become like your other half, no secrets, no lies, just unconditional love. They must accept all of you and love you with all of their heart and soul. That is no small task. Luckily there is no time limit; when that person has accepted you and has agreed to spend eternity with you, have that person touch the symbol; it will then transfer to their hand and ensure that they will live as long as you do. But be warned, they can still be killed just as you can. Should you or your loved one get stabbed through the heart you _will_ die. Any other injury will heal but that. But be careful; the one you love might already be near death. If that is so, just write their name down in your Life Note and extend their lives by five years or so, I believe that even you can achieve love in that time."

Kira really didn't know what to say. He had been given the chance not to spend all of eternity alone. To have someone to spend all those years with him, to love just him... it was more than he deserved.

"Thank you… thank you so much. I don't even know if I deserve this… No, I know I don't, but I will make you proud… I will bring justice and peace to the world… but not the way I did before… No I will find another way, one that doesn't involve mass killing."

The little Mother just gave him a heart warming smiled and continued.

"Unlike the King I _do_ know where and when you will go. I was going to keep it a surprise but I guess I can tell you a little, but only because you have pleased me so. You will go to a time after you have picked up the Death Note, it was inevitable that that would happen, but it will be before you become the false L. Also, you will remember everything, because how can you repent for your sins if you cannot remember them? You will merge with the current Kira; he will not disappear entirely, but you will have control over the body. You will also be able to project out of that body and into your true form, but only when that body is in slumber. The only ones who will be able to see you in your true form are those who have touched your Life Note. It may be touched by others but only you can give it to someone else for safe keeping. Not quite ownership, but close. They can also write in it, but only you and, should you choose someone, the holder you have trusted it to, can use it to extend life. Remember, it is your own life that is taken, but as the King said, you are immortal now, so it doesn't really matter. With anyone else who tries to write in, the page will remain blank. No matter what kind of ink they use, they will not even be able to make a spot on the note without your permission. The Life Note will stay with your true form but you may call for it in your human form and it will appear, so that even when you may be vulnerable you will still be able to hide your note. Now, I believe that is all I had to tell you."

The god started to turn around then stopped and turned back.

"One more thing; I will answer one question from you, and whatever that question is, I will answer it truthfully, but you must hurry; the King is done with the preparations."

And indeed the King had been quite busy while the little god had been talking. He had cut archaic symbols into his skin and had removed his shirt and pants, leaving himself naked. As if by some type of signal, he looked at them and offered Kira a sad farewell expression; then he turned towards the black pool and began chanting in a strange language that sent shivers up and down Kira's spine.

While he'd been looking at the King he'd failed to see the child-like god also moving towards the pool. When he finally looked at her he saw that she was also naked and had the strange markings on her, though she had not yet start to chant, instead apparently waiting for him.

As if in a trance he too walked towards them and stood between them facing the pool. He knew what they were doing. They were going to use up all of their remaining life force to grant him passage back. They would truly die after this.

He looked at the King and bowed his head in gratitude; the King just smiled faintly and continued chanting. He then looked at the little god and offered her a smile of such happiness he was surprised his face didn't spilt. She smiled back.

He didn't know what kind of question to ask; he could ask who his soul mate was, or when the world would end, or any number of other things.

But when he opened his mouth to ask one of these, he was taken by surprise when his mouth formed a question he didn't even remember considering.

"What is L's real name?"

The goddess smiled and replied.

"L… L Lawliet. Use that name wisely my precious one. Remember, by changing your path, the fates have changed; even if you decide to no longer be the killer Kira, someone else may take up the mantel you have left behind and you may have to fight to keep those you love safe. Just remember the future is no longer the same as the one you lived in. Be careful dear one, and take care of those you hold close. Live wisely and happily. Goodbye my cherished little one. "

"Goodbye…"

The little Mother also started to chant and with her voice added to the King's, the air around them seemed to become heavier, and Kira began to feel light-headed. His vision also became fuzzy and the room seemed to be moving under his feet.

Before he knew it, he felt his body fall forwards into the inky blackness of the pool.

---

It was very painful; he had thought regaining his memories had been excruciating, but this was on a completely different scale. He felt himself screaming, but couldn't really hear anything. It felt like he was being pulled deeper and farther away.

After he'd been falling for what felt like forever, he came to a sudden halt. It felt like he was floating in midair. He tried to open his eyes. After a few attempts he finally succeeded in keeping them open. He appeared to be hovering over something, looking around he noticed he was in a stone enclosed area. It looked very familiar but he couldn't place it. Looking down he felt a jolt of shock. It was him… well, a younger him. The younger version of himself was bound and sitting in front of an uncomfortable looking cot. A twisted up Ryuk was standing in a corner and didn't seem to be able to see him.

Kira shook his head in remembrance; this was when L had confined him in a cell after he'd said he might be Kira. He'd said that because Rem had threatened to kill him if he didn't save Misa… Oh god, how he'd hated her, but at the time he hadn't wanted to die so he'd thought up a plan to save both Misa and himself from getting caught… and a way to kill L in the process.

Kira gave his head another shake, this time in disgust. He would not be killing L this time. No, he finally acknowledged that L was a good person and was maybe even represented true justice, or at least, truer then his own had been. He would have to find a way to keep himself from being arrested as Kira while keeping L alive. Because not only was L was a good person… he was also Kira's only true friend. Even when they'd been trying to kill each other they had been friends; the fighting, the arguments, the aggravating habit of L eating in bed… it was something he cherished, because even with all of that they could also talk to each other as equals, understand each other like no one else could, hell, they were practically made for each other.

Kira stopped at that thought.

'_Made for each other?! Where the hell did that come from? I just meant that it would be really boring if L wasn't around to mess with… but aren't I immortal now? L will have to die at some point; he is human after all… and then what? Ahhh. I'll think about that later, right now I have to figure out how to get into my body.'_

Kira apparently didn't need to bother figuring it out. Just as he'd been wondering which day of his confinement it was, the answer came as the younger version of himself started talking to L over the intercom.

It happened when his younger self said the words "-this pride of mine, I just have to give it up."

After those words had been spoken it felt like he was being sucked down into a whirlpool. He saw himself connecting to his younger self; becoming one being instead of two. He had to be grateful though, he was connecting to Raito instead of the current Kira. It was just as he fully embraced himself into his younger human body that he felt it.

PAIN.

He was vaguely aware of someone screaming. It took him a minute to realize it was himself. But he didn't really care because it _hurt_. It was almost as bad as when he'd traveled through time.

He dimly heard other people talking, screaming to make themselves heard over his own screams. He tried to understand what they were saying but he felt unconsciousness taking hold of him.

He managed to make out a few words.

"-is he having a heart attack?!"

"-urry get him out of there!"

"He's going into shock!!"

"Raito-kun!"

The last voice seemed to penetrate the darkness a little. He knew that voice… Who did it belong to again? He opened his mouth a little and croaked out a name before the darkness claimed him and he passed out.

"Lawliet…?"

---

**Reposted and Beted: 9/13/09**

Remember to leave a review on your way to the next chapter!! XD


	5. Chapter 5

Summary: It was all suppose to end after Ryuk wrote in the deathnote, but redemption gave Raito another chance, will he chose to walk the same path as Kira? Or will he repent for his sins?

Warning: A lot of BAD Language, Gore, blood, mental scarring nightmare (heh I'm mad at Raito right now, I just reread when he killed L…I'm pissed :) ooh some very, very small sexual action, really I don't think it needs a warning but just in case, it's not even graphic, it just a touch really…

I would first off like to say thank you for all of you who have reviewed, I apologize for not thanking any of you in my last chapter.

Also L has a gift to give to one of my favorite reviewers…KISSES! For BlackDranzer-1119 who has reviewed every chapter so far and given me wonderful reviews! This chapter is for you!

I'm sorry that it has been so long since I updated, my muse had given me a false trail to follow her when she had escaped her cell, she lead me to Thailand but she was at the Bahamas. Sunbathing. Bitch. Also SCHOOL SUCKS! Bah nothing but homework, homework, homework. AHHHHHHHH!! Ok ah now that that's out of my system I feel a bit better. Let's get typing…

I will now start addressing Kira as Raito because he is no longer Kira anymore, also I will be calling Lawliet with both of his names Ryuzaki and L at least for now you will get what I mean later in the chapter. I'm sorry if that will confuse any of you later. Enjoy.

--

It was dark. That was one of the first things that came to his attention. The second thing that caught his attention was the sinister presence that surrounded him.

He felt scared…no not scared down right terrified was more like it. He didn't know why he was here or where here was but he did know he wanted to leave. NOW.

It felt like he was being watched. Stared at with an unblinking force.

He could suddenly feel the malevolence presence right behind him. It felt like it was pushing, pressuring him to turn around. Like it wanted him to look at the face, the face of the monster that hunted him. He didn't want to look, if only in hope that if he wasn't able to see it, the monster would leave him alone. It was a prey's hope, a weakling's hope. An all too human's hope.

That fearful thought shocked him enough for him to feel something other then the mind numbing fear that seemed to freeze his limbs, a smoldering hate started to burned through him, melting the ice that had seemed to have covered him from the inside and out. He reveled in that fiery emotion if only for a minute before a spike of malevolent energy reminded him of the…fiend that was currently behind him. The flames of his anger went out suddenly, he tried franticly to call it back, for it to continue to fill him with the false bravo it had created in him, but the flames of his anger had dissipated so utterly that he could not reach it.

The fear…the fear that had seemed to swallow him whole, that numbing ice returned like it never left.

He felt his body turning around without his permission. It was just like being a puppet. A puppet that was being controlled by a very wicked puppeteer. Unwilling he started to slowly turned around. It was both torturous and agonizing; when he finally finished turning around he felt his head move forcibly up to look straight ahead, the sight that greeted his eyes made him feel more pain both emotional and psychical then he could ever have imagined that he would feel in his entire life. If he could have screamed he would have but it was like his lips had been sewed shut. His eyes had widened in horror and disbelief, pleading, begging for it not to be true. Haunting scarlet…no not scarlet…ebony eyes stared at him. But they did not belong to the fiend who he had half-expected to see.

He was just like he remembered him to be all those years ago. Wild free-flowing black hair stuck outward in all directions yet also framed a delicate pallid face. The worn shads of black that framed large vacant eyes seemed bigger then he remembered, the eyes captivated him, seemingly to almost swallow him into a deep dark well of darkness. The fear that he felt before was slowly fading away after nothing happening for a while, Ryuzaki just stared at him. Not moving towards or away from him. Raito was even able to almost ignore the malice that covered his once time friend and enemy seemingly to create a black almost vapor like cloud around him. It also seemed that he had been able to regained control of own body. Hopefully it stayed that way.

Ryuzaki just stared at him; not moving, showing no expression at all, his face was so still, just like a fragile, delicate glass doll. Raito took the chance to look at the rest of him. He was wearing his usually attire, white long sleeved shirt and baggy blue jeans, no shoes. The Ryuzaki that stood before him was almost accurate to the real one.

But there was one thing that stood out; there was one thing that should not have been there. It took Raito a few minutes to process it; it was like they had been invisible to his eyes before. But they seemed to suddenly stand out right now so much that he was shocked he had not noticed them before.

Wings. Broken bleeding beautiful black wings. Silvery chains seemed to wrap around them, keeping them from spreading out.

Without realizing it he began to stretch his own wings in empathy. In shock he looked at himself to see that he was in his hybrid human-shinigami form. He looked at his hands apathetically; he started to take stock of the rest of himself before his mind could react to the sight that had greeted him when he looked at his hands.

He raised his head up and closed his eyes and tried to blank his mind of any stray thoughts in the wish to try to stop himself from hyperventilating. Feeling himself calm down somewhat he let his thoughts come back from the no space that he had just occupied for a few seconds.

He breathed sharply inward before looking back down at his hands again. The sight made him gag with revulsion and horror and made him start to hyperventilate again.

Blood. Blood and what seemed to be broken black feathers seemed to cover his hands and streaked all the way towards his forearms, covering his arms almost entirely.

The realization of what the mess on him meant hit him suddenly. Horror and anguish filled him.

Within that moment of that realization the sense of malice and hate grew to vast proportions.

The fear was back, but instead of it being a numbing ice like fear like before, now it had become a blazing panic. He knew if he looked up right now it would be his death and dismemberment that he would be facing.

But to his dread, the controlling feeling came back. He tried to resist, fighting the force that compelled him to look, to look at the face of one who he had hurt.

No…the one he had destroyed.

Just like a puppet with its strings being pulled he felt his head come up to look at Ryuzaki.

"NO!"

Pure horror and abhorrence coursed through him at the sight that greeted him. Total denial tried to invade his mind; sadly he did not have that luxury.

Ryuzaki was in the same position that he was in before, if Raito could block out everything else he could even say that nothing had happened.

But even if Ryuzaki hadn't moved and his expression was still the same, everything was different. Totally devastatingly different.

Standing just behind Ryuzaki was a shadow of a man or what he thought was a man. The shadow had his arms around the broken Ryuzaki; the man's arms were in the shape of large shadowy claws. They were digging into the white rapidly turning red shirt, seeming to be slowly gutting Ryuzaki.

Ryuzaki didn't even flinch when the claws slowly retracted from his stomach. A flowing stream of blood spilled from the jagged hole that the claws had created.

A wordless cry of dismay spilled from Raito's lips at the sight.

He felt rage. Rage he hadn't felt in a long time. He tried to see the man behind Ryuzaki, but the shadows seemed to almost be alive and completely engulfed the monster.

He tried to run over towards Ryuzaki in the hopes that somehow he would be able to help him. But it was like his body was paralyzed unable to move towards his friend. Because that was exactly what Ryuzaki was, a friend, the only true one Raito had ever had despite the lies and the deceitful game that they had to play when Raito had been Kira and Ryuzaki was L.

He struggle or tried to anyway in the hopes that the paralyzation that seemed to engulfed him would lift. No such luck.

He continued to watch in rising horror as the shadow continued to slowly torture Ryuzaki, inflicting horrible but non-fatal gashes and cuts.

Bright red blood freely flowed down Ryuzaki's front down towards his bare toes creating a small puddle around them. It didn't stay small though; the previously small red puddle was growing.

Giving forth a small moan of distress Raito came to the realization that even if his body was paralyzed his vocals were not.

Determination coursed through him as a plan started to form inside his head. It was what he was good at, planning under stress, reveled when Misa had been taken under suspicion of being the second Kira and Rem had been threatening to kill him if he didn't save her. He had come up with a brilliant plan to save both Misa and himself while also guaranteeing the death of L.

Now instead of planning the destruction of L he was trying to save him. If Raito had the leisure and time and had been his previous self he would have appreciate the irony of the situation. But alas he did not and was not his previous self so he didn't even waste a second of his brainstorming to think such things. All that mattered was saving Ryuzaki.

--

It wasn't a terrible complicated plan. He had nether the time nor could he indulge in his no space that he liked to dive into to help him think. His emotions were also harping on his thinking process and they did nothing but distract him.

'Ok, while the plan may not be as fool proof as I would like it to be it should work, I have my voice so I'll just try to direct its attention towards myself I don't really care what it will do to me as long as it leaves Ryuzaki alone. I just hope it will work…it really depends on that…thing. Ahh god damn it all! Why the fuck is this happening?! Ok just calm down Raito deep breaths in then out, just breathe. Ok this had better work I'm in no condition to think of a better idea and…what the fuck is that thing doing now!?'

While Raito had been formulating his plan the shadow had continued its devastating destruction of Ryuzaki's body. But it seemed while Raito had been busy a change had occurred, one he did not like at all.

Both of the shadow's monster like claws seemed to shrink some and seemed to lose most of its animal shape bringing them to an almost human shape hand except with unnatural long fingers and deadly pointed nails, one of the hands moved from it's place around Ryuzaki's neck, it began to trail downwards seemly carefully not to mar the skin or rip the fabric which instantly put Raito on high alert. The dodgy arm seemed to slither right down Ryuzaki's chest and stopped right at Ryuzaki's lower stomach.

Raito felt a forlorn chill creep up his spine. A sudden thought came to him of what the arm was going to do. He prayed to every god he could think of that he was wrong.

Sadly it seemed that his luck just wasn't with him today as his fears became justified.

Before his eyes he watched as that disgusting appendage creep into the top of Ryuzaki's pants.

Ryuzaki for the first time made a small noise. It was like listening to a dying animal calling for help.

'Oh my god…is that monster actually molesting him!? Who the fuck does he think he is?! How dare he touch Ryuzaki, I will kill this monster!'

All fear and nervousness that had been with him previously fled in the light of his fury. It also seemed to have the affect of clearing his mind a bit. He was also startled to realize that the evil energy he felt earlier that he thought had been coming from Ryuzaki was actually coming from the monster behind him. It seemed it had been hiding behind Ryuzaki and had been bidding its time of attack.

'Bastard! I've already lost Ryuzaki once I won't lose him again!'

The damned arm seemed to be moving around inside of Ryuzaki's pants and its twin had also moved. The other arm was under Ryuzaki's shirt, Raito did not want to know what exactly the damned appendages were doing to poor Ryuzaki.

Ryuzaki was still making those wounded animal noises. They pulled on Raito's heart when he heard them. Making Raito want to just rip him away from the monster that was tormenting him and then try to comfort him to the best of his ability.

Raito became determine that that was what he was going to do. He took a deep breath to calm any nerves that may be a little frazzled and gripped his fury and sent it outward.

"Hey Asshole! Let Ryuzaki go you pig-swallow son of a whore bastard! Why don't you pick on someone else? Come on you fucktard I dare you to try that shit with me I'll kick your ass so hard you'll be begging Ryuzaki for forgiveness! You donkey piss-ant dung piece of shit! I bet you are only doing this because you have no dick to actually wank off to! Come on you sheep-humping-ass-licking-shit eater! I mean really is this all you can do to me? Let me watch? I'm a sitting duck here and you're not doing anything about it? What don't have the balls to attack me? You shriveled up dick-less bitch of a whore. I bet it takes a whole shitload of Viagra to get that non existent dick of yours to even twitch-"

It finally seemed that the shadow had had enough. Which was both good and bad, good because the fiend finally took it's hand out of Ryuzaki's pants and because Raito had been running out of insults. Bad because now the shadow seemed intent on him and the evil energy seemed to have spike onto a whole another level, also Raito rather enjoyed finally being able to rant out his frustrations.

It seemed that the shadow had come to some type of conclusion because it moved both of its arms from Ryuzaki.

Who then fell to the ground in what seemed a dead faint.

"Ryuzaki!"

"I wouldn't worry too much about him, it's you that should be worried Raito."

Raito froze as the voice seemed to penetrate the very space around him.

He knew that voice. As much as he knew his own.

Because the voice that came with the shadow was his very own voice.

"You should have just let me play with him. It would have spared yourself any agony-"

"Shut up! Watching you hurt him was more agonizing then anything you could do to me! Stop using my voice and show yourself coward!"

"Hn you are pathetic. You are powerless here as you where back then. I should have found a way to utterly destroy you when I had the chance but I didn't believe you where a threat. Heh I still don't, you are the still the justice loving fair playing piece of shit school boy that you were before I came along. Pathetic really, how you actually believe that you could redeem yourself. Ourselves."

With that last word the shadows seemed to sink into the man like he was a sponge.

Raito watched in despair and rising horror as what he unknowingly feared became a horrifying reality.

Standing across from him was the worse nightmare he could ever have conjured. Smirking in a most terrifying and maddening manner the shade like man raised his arm in a mocking parody of a wave.

Kira was back in all his foreboding glory.

--

The first thing that Raito thought was that he looked terrifying and ugly with that sneer on his face. When Raito's brain caught up with that thought he felt like slapping himself. That was not him. It had been the evil energy that the Deathnote had poured into him that created this monster that now stood across from him. The question that he should be concentrating on is why is it still here? He had thought that the Shinigami King and the Little Mother would have destroyed any evil elements that would have still reside in him before sending him back to the past.

Raito wasn't stupid he knew all of this was a dream, but when he had saw that Ryuzaki was being hurt he totally forgotten that crucial fact and tried to help him. In resprospect he would still have tried to help him even if he had remembered that this was a dream. He couldn't bear to see Ryuzaki suffer anymore then he had already. Maybe that was why he had what seemed to be Ryuzaki's blood and feathers on him. He felt guilty. Guilty that he had killed such an angel. Yes that was what Ryuzaki represented in life. A guardian angel. One that he had killed. No not just him…he was more to blame then him…Kira.

Kira looked just like what Raito believed he must have looked like when he had died. Right down to the blood stained suit that he had worn when he had gone to the ware house and been killed by Near. There were a few differences that showed how inhuman Kira was. Kira's whole body seemed to be dripped in blood and what seemed to be some kind of black ink.

'How disgusting, god it looks like he bathed in blood and sludge. Urg, no wonder L wanted to catch me so bad. I could almost taste the foulness and evilness radiating from him. Wait thinking about L…'

He turned his attention from the madly grinning manic in front of him to the figure laying still on the ground. Was he still alive? Some of those cuts had been pretty bad. And the chains that seemed to wrap around his wings looked like they had tighten, there was a more broken feathers around the still body. He wanted to go over and check on him. It worried him that the red puddle of Ryuzaki's blood seemed to be getting bigger, even though it shouldn't worry him because this was all happening in his mind.

Just when he thought of moving a miracle seemed to happen, he could have wept tears of joy but he steeled himself from doing that if only because he didn't want to show any weakness in front of the evil that had corrupted him so long ago.

He was able to move. He had regained control over his own body again.

--

Raito made sure that nothing of his newly found discovery showed on his face. His plan had worked wonderfully before, the shadow monster now known as the evil essence of Kira had turned it's attention from Ryuzaki to Raito instead. Raito was kind of surprised that it was so easy to distract Kira.

It was almost disappointing.

'What am I thinking? I should be happy that it was that easy. Still…was I always that easy to distract and anger? Hmmm…yes, yes I was…after I got ownership of the Deathnote I became more impulsive and easier to anger. Just take the Lind L. Tailor incident, normally I would never have done something so impulsive without having more facts and having more upper ground…but I killed him only because I had thought he had question me…god what kind of monster did I become?'

Raito looked into the red crazed eyes of his former self and knew what kind of monster he had been. He was staring at it face to face. Pure Evil.

Kira seemed too finally tire of the stare off he was having with him and started to taunt him with insults and threats.

Raito blocked them as best he could and started to come up with another plan to get to Ryuzaki and hopefully get away from Kira.

Again it was a fairly simple plan but it seemed he didn't really a totally complicated plan when it came to his darker half.

The plan was much like his former plan had been. If it worked once there was an almost one hundred percent guarantee it would work again, since it didn't seem that Kira had his intelligent anymore. It was mostly its own entity now. At least this is what Raito figured. Only because he himself didn't feel any of its taint on himself. It had feed off his negative emotions before, growing till he himself had no real control over the later years of his life. Maybe that was why he got caught by Near, Kira had completely taken over his conscious and body, its not that surprising that he was caught. Kira was all impulsive emotions and half baked plans. It was a wonder that he had survived the 5 years after he had taken over after the death of L.

Raito winched at that thought. He could now admit to himself that he had felt something inside him die when L had been killed. Maybe even more so because it was Raito himself that had staged Ryuzaki's death.

Raito was still kind of zoning out what Kira was ranting about till one particular phase caught his attention.

"-you know that you wanted it. Ha, it took a lot of will power for me not to be sick. The man that was chasing us and would have killed us without hesitation. You lusted after him! Disgusting! Weak! You even felt for him! I could have almost forgiven the lusting, hell even I think he might have had potential as my slave in our new world. But you! You cared about him! How?! How could you-"

After that Raito started to zone out again to think about what Kira had just unearthed. He knew he had cared about Ryuzaki as a friend…but did he care about him as more then that? That was the big question and one Raito could not answer no matter how hard he thought about it. Maybe…maybe he could in the future. But for now he had the present to deal with.

Raito took another deep breath and prepared himself for what he was going to do.

Cutting off Kira mid rant he began his own taunting.

"So are you done ranting and raving yet? Because frankly you are boring me to death. Hell Mu was more entertaining then you and I technically didn't even exist there. How the hell did you survive anyway? By talking your enemies to death? Heh most likely, its not like you have two brain cells to rub together, it was never you who came up with the ideas and plans, all you did was sit in the back of my mind, stinking up the place. I don't really know how L could have lost to you, even if you had my intelligence to back you up, he's ten times the man you could ever inspire to be. If there had to be a new god of the world it wouldn't have been either you or me but Ryuzaki-"

Kira finally seemed to snap at the last sentence. While Raito had been talking the smug expression on Kira's face had been slowly fading, now all that was present was pure rage. Rage that seemed to be directed at Raito right now.

Kira let out a tremendous roar of rage before running towards Raito. It was clear he was going to hurt the unmoving Raito. Who was seemingly defenseless.

At the last moment Raito made his move. Kira let out a startled sound as his previously thought defenseless prey threw his body back in an almost matrix move and left hooked him in the face.

Kira let out a howl of pain as his face made a cracking sound, Raito had defiantly broken something.

Faster then Raito had predicted Kira recovered enough and tried to tackle him to the ground to gain the upper hand. Raito managed to move at the last second to get out of the way.

They then began a true life and death battle. Raito became aware that this was not like his old fights with Ryuzaki, hell compared to the battle that he was engaged in now those fights with Ryuzaki might as well been child slaps.

Raito had no direct fighting style so just fought with all he had, punching, kicking, clawing, biting, hair pulling, you name it. Raito knew he would have to fight dirty if he wanted to survive this fight.

He hurt. That was the only thing he could think of at that moment. His cloths were ripped and bloody and his left wing seemed to be at least fractured, it had bent in an odd angle and it hurt like hell.

"What are you going to do huh Raito? Heh your weak, you focus only on your intelligence that you disregard brutal strength. I will just depose of you now and retake over your body. Hahah second chances don't make me laugh. You really thought you could redeem your self. The blood on your hands is proof enough of the pain that you have caused. The truth is you're just making excuses to yourself and others, you and I are one and the same, we both believe we are superior to others. We…no I deserve to be GOD! Only I can clean up this disgusting world! Only Me! And when I finally destroy you I'll retake your body, then I will get L to trust me…heh maybe I will make him fall in love with me, become totally devoted to my will…then I will kill him in the worse way possible, but before he dies I will make sure that he knows that the person that he trusted, the one he loved most…betrayed and murdered him. HAHAHAAHAHA."

Fury had been building with each word that came out of Kira's mouth. At the end of it all Raito could see was red. His sight was tunneled and at the end of that tunnel was the problem, the threat, and it needed to be eliminated. Raito in a quick sense of clarity knew now why he was having this god damned nightmare. Before he could redeem himself he need to destroy that last part of himself that still wanted to destroy everything, the part of him that only wanted to rule over others, the sense of self that didn't care about anyone but himself. The dark side of himself that manifested as the monster named Kira.

Even after that thought came to him it quickly left again leaving only the rage. Kira had said that he had only relayed on his intelligence, well he'll give him something else to work against.

A wave of pure wrath seemed to well out of Raito suddenly covering his body in a haze cloud of red, it seemed to startle Kira enough that he let his guard down enough to gap in awe and slight fear.

It was all the opening that Raito needed.

"I will not let you touch him!"

With that battle cry Raito fell on Kira's startled form and just started to savagely rip apart his enemy. Kira tried to fight back but it seemed like Raito had been strengthen ten times what he had been before when the threat of Ryuzaki had been uttered. Kira was only now realizing his mistake, but by then it was too late.

Raito let his long nails rip large gashes on both Kira's face and chest. It was hard to tell that Kira was bleeding at all considering he had already been covered in blood to begin with. The blood that had covered his hands previously from what he believed to have been Ryuzaki's mixed in with Kira's, seemingly almost like he was washing his hands clean with the blood of his enemy, washing away the blood of his only friend.

But the loud cries of pain and anger that came out of Kira's mouth told Raito that he was doing some damage at least.

Raito finally getting tired of the fight, wrapped his hands around Kira's throat and tighten his grip.

Strangely enough Raito felt no pleasure at killing his dark self. The rage had completely left him and all he felt was a sense of pity and sadness. It was not Kira's fault that he existed. It was Raito that picked up the Deathnote, it was Raito that had decided to try it out, it was Raito that decided that he would kill criminals in the belief that he was bettering the world. Kira only started to exist when Raito had decided that he would become a god and created a new world in what he believed the world should be like. That he would become Judge, Jury, and Executioner of the new world that he would create.

When the life finally left the red eyes of the self proclaimed god Raito slowly took his hands away from the newly deceased Kira. He slowly lifted his hand and gently closed the glazed eyes.

Raito closed his own eyes for a moment and just sat there, giving the now deceased part of him a moment of silence. After a few minutes of that he slowly got to his feet, the pain that racked his body reminded him that he was injured.

Groaning almost silently he shuffled slowly towards the still nonmoving form of his friend.

When he got there he was horrified to find that while he had been fighting Kira the puddle of blood that had been pouring out of Ryuzaki had almost doubled in size.

"Ryuzaki? Come on you can get up he's gone now, gone for good so there's no more reason to play dead…get up…please just get up…"

Raito slowly kneeled down in the growing puddle and reached out his hands, absentmindedly noting that they were faintly trembling, from fear or exhaustion he didn't know nor cared. All that mattered at that moment was weather Ryuzaki was alive or…

Raito shook that trail of thought quickly before it could set root. Ryuzaki had fallen face first so Raito couldn't see his face, with grim determination Raito steeled himself and gripped Ryuzaki's shoulders being mindful of the broken wings on his back, he quickly jerked him around so he would be on his back instead.

Raito couldn't stop the gasp of shock from leaving his dropped jaw for the life of him. Because what he saw wasn't in any scenario that he could have ever imagined.

There was Ryuzaki, neither dead nor dying nor pass out or anything to that magnitude.

What Raito saw that had shocked him so utterly was the expression on Ryuzaki's face.

Ryuzaki was conscious and what was more was he was smiling.

--

"Hello Raito-kun"

Raito was speechless. That was the only thing that could explain why his jaw keep moving up and down but no sound came out. Finally he managed to crook out a question.

"Ryuzaki?"

But Ryuzaki shook his head and started to try to sit up. Raito saw that he was having a little trouble and quickly without thinking reached out to help him.

Ryuzaki looked startled at the held out hand. He stared at it for a second and then looked at Raito with an unreadable expression on his face. After a moment a small smile broke out on his face. Raito found himself speechless for the second time in only a few minutes.

Ryuzaki was quick to take his hand after that and after a little stumbling they both were standing up, well as much as they could with being injured and all.

They just stood there for an unknown amount of time just looking at each other. Finally Ryuzaki broke the small staring contest to look at the body of his previous tormentor.

"It must have been hard. He may have been evil but he had been a part of you, and to kill any part of yourself would cause anyone pain."

Raito also looked at the body of his darker half and gave a half sigh.

"It was hard, but it was both necessary and enviable. We could no longer occupy the same body, it was either him or me and my survival instinct was better I guess."

Ryuzaki shot him another unreadable expression before a smirk formed on his face.

"Yes survival instinct…I'm sure that was what kept you alive and what enviably won you that fight…strange it only came out when he started to threaten me…you turn an interesting shade of red Raito-kun."

Raito could practically taste the smugness that oozed out of Ryuzaki right now.

He quickly decided to change the subject; it was just something he wasn't yet ready to face.

"You are not really Ryuzaki." Raito stated matter-of-factly.

Ryuzaki nodded his head in agreement.

"Yes we are in your mind now, more specifically your inner psyche. After you merged with your past self after arriving back in the year 2004 you went into a light coma. It was necessary in order for the transaction to fully take place. What the Mother and King had not expected was even without the memories the shade of Kira still resided inside your younger self. It didn't matter that the memories were gone Kira still lived on inside of you. To completely gain control of your new life you had to destroy that shade of Kira completely. Now that you have you can really regain your chance for your redemption."

"One question, who are you and how do you know all of this? I know you're not created by my mind."

Raito was curious but he was also cautious. He knew unlike the dead Kira that this Ryuzaki had not originated from him.

"You are correct I'm not something you made up. Let me tell you a little information that the King failed to tell you. All Notes that the King creates has some sentinel conscious, Kira was actually the conscious that resided in the Deathnote, though the essence only has vague feelings and not much intelligence to begin with, but you poured your dreams and ambitions in the deathnote its really no surprise that it was able to manifested into something with more higher thought."

While Raito was processing all that Ryuzaki was saying; he came to a sudden conclusion.

"You are the essence in my Lifenote aren't you?"

"Good job Raito-kun, yes I am the core of the Lifenote, I took the form of the one closes to you in the hope that you would talk with me easier, but before I could even do that, the essence from the deathnote Kira, got a hold of me and put me in some type of bind. It was stronger then me at the time because it was more bonded to you then you were to me, and we are in your mind so that just made it that much stronger then me. It-"

Ryuzaki or the being that had Ryuzaki's face cut off mind explanation. He tilted his head to one side much like when the real Ryuzaki did when he was thinking about something or listening to something important.

"I'm sorry to say that it seems our time will have to be cut short. The human that I had taken the appearance of seems intent on waking you. You did say something quite stupid of you before you passed out."

Raito was trying to figure out what he meant by that but he couldn't really remember if he had said something or not. The pain had been bad, really, really bad.

Raito still had some questions left so hurried to ask them.

"Will we meet again?"

Ryuzaki looked at him in surprise. Probably at his choice of question.

"Not like this. Well, not unless it is a life or death situation. We will be able to somewhat communicate empathically."

"What do you mean?"

"Emotions Raito-kun emotions, I will be able to communicate what I feel on a certain situation just as you can do with me. Maybe in the future we could communicate telepathically but our bond is too weak at the moment right now. We do occupy the same mindset in a sense. I hope you don't mind that because with you being immortal now and me being your note we are going to be together for a long time. For what's going to happen now is that the energy that I'm using right now in taking this form and talking to you is taking a lot out of me. I will most likely go into a light coma myself after this. So don't worry if you won't be able to feel me for a while. It will take a while to build up energy again. You may still use the LifeNote but I will just be sleeping if you will. Now that we have that taken care of we have to deal with Kira."

Now Raito was really puzzled. He was surprised to realize that he didn't mind sharing his emotions or his mind space with the spirit of the LifeNote. It strangely comforted him instead.

"What should I call you? And what do you mean deal with Kira? Isn't he already dead?"

Ryuzaki had moved over to the still body of Kira and was looking at it and murmuring to himself. At Raito's question he looked up from where they had been looking at the corpse.

"Oh, well I don't really have a name so you can just keep calling me Ryuzaki if you want or maybe Zaki instead it would probably be easier to call me that instead of Ryuzaki, you wouldn't want to mix me up with the real one. As to what I meant about Kira…do you want to have his corpse laying in your mind for eternity?"

Raito couldn't help the small flush that spread threw his cheeks at that statement.

"No of course not but how do you propose we get rid of it?" Raito couldn't help but scowl, his pride was still smarting by his uncharacteristic response to Zaki's question.

"For you absorb him of course." Zaki said in a voice that shouted 'Duh'.

"Huh? What do you mean absorb him? How would I do that? Why would I do that?"

Zaki gave a small sigh that just spelled that his patience was at its limit. He turned to Raito and gestured him to come over to where he was standing. Raito was still kind of wary but he did as he was told. After walking the short distance he stood next to Zaki and waited for him to explain.

He didn't have to wait long.

"Ok we don't have much time, the real Ryuzaki is getting really impatient with his inability to wake you…I think he's about to use the shock paddles, you know what they use to electric you with, most likely to get your heart racing and hopefully wake you up. Your father and the others are restraining him now but I don't know how long they will be able to do that for. Heh you really did a stupid thing when you called out his name."

Now Raito was alarmed. L wouldn't do that…would he?

"Wait what do you mean I called out his name? Which one?...oh no, tell me I didn't…"

"Yes you called out his true name. Not very loudly I might say but enough for at least two people to hear you, one being L himself."

"And the other?"

"Heh, Matsuda."

"Ah great just fucking great. Can my life get any more freaking complicated?!"

"Yes but we won't go into that right now." whisper _'It really depends on the writer's muse's mood swings'_

"Huh did you say something?"

"No it was nothing, now as to why you may want to absorb your darker half that's just it, weather you like it or not he is your other half and you will always be complete without him. He is dead in all the ways that matter so he will not influence you anymore. With him dead he no longer holds the deathnote's taint; he is just your darker emotions now. And you can not have love and joy without hate and sadness. So you must absorb him Raito-kun, if you want to be human again. Or as much as a human as anyone in your position could be."

Raito took a deep breath as he took in all that the spirit of his Lifenote said. He saw the logic in it and decided that what the spirit said was true.

"Ok then how do I absorb my darker emotions?"

"It's quite simple; there are two ways to do that. You could devour him."

"Wh-what you mean eat him?! No!"

"I thought you might not like that option so lets go with option number two."

There was a small pause as Zaki seemed to puzzle out how he was going to explain the second option.

Finally Raito got tired of waiting and asked.

"And that is…?"

"Well it's not to much different from the first option…let's just get in position and I will explain it from there. Face him face to face."

Raito lifted an eyebrow at that odd request but did as he was told. He crouched down till he was slightly hovering over his dead self. He looked at the face of the darkness that had taken over and ruined his life. It was slacken in death, almost peaceful seeming really.

"Ok now what?"

"Now…kiss him."

Silence.

"WHAT!"

"You heard me, just do what I said."

"Bu-but..."

"No Raito-kun you must absorb him and the only way to do that is to become connected to him intimately. We could always go with the first option eating him; the third option involves necrophilia so I'm not even going to think about that."

Raito still looked at him like he lost his mind. Zaki sighed and tiredly started to explain again. That sigh reminded Raito that the spirit was still injured and was still using a lot of energy. Energy that was running out fast, Raito quickly made a decision.

"It's ok; you don't have to explain again, I'll do it."

Zaki looked fairly shocked before he realized why Raito agreed so readily. He just gave out a tired smile before fading somewhat.

"Thank you, the kiss doesn't have to be a big one, just a press of lips will do it, after that you should absorb him and wake up. I for one will be taking a well deserved nap. Just being newly created and then having been tortured and molested by my owners darker half can take a lot out of a note like me. It will be a while till we can communicate again either emotionally or otherwise, so you be careful, hmm I should probably heal us first before leaving."

With that a soft glow seemed to cover both Zaki and Raito. When it left a moment latter, the wounds on both of them were gone. Zaki's wings where still wrapped in chains but it was more like the chains where gently covering the wings, now seemingly to protect them instead of constricting them. Raito's broken wing had also healed and the blood that had covered him from the fight with Kira was all gone. It was like he had been cleansed. Given a brand new beginning.

"Goodnight Raito-kun."

Raito had blushed red when Zaki had reminded him that his darker half had…touched him. He quickly got that under enough control to also wish his note a goodnight and thank you for healing him, promising that he would be careful.

With that the spirit of the LifeNote faded from view. Now it was just Raito and the corpse of his dark emotions that dwelled in the vast dark of Raito inner psyche.

'Ok then let's get this over with.'

With that thought Raito unhesitantly bent down and touched his lips to his lifeless darker half.

--

Raito slowly became aware little by little; at first he had the feeling like he was floating, that nothing could touch him. A soft darkness seemed to surround him unlike the darkness that had surrounded him so long ago; this darkness was gently allowing him to relax. Sadly it did not last long.

All too soon a nagging feeling started to disturb his peaceful rest. Raito tried to stay asleep but soon the feeling persisted to an almost maddening irritation.

The first thing that Raito was became aware of was the noise. A little ways towards his right side a hush conversation was taking place. They were speaking to low and fast for him to be able to tell what they where saying but by the way he could feel eyes staring at him it was no bet that he was the subject of that conversation.

Raito inwardly gave a small sigh of irritation. The darkness had been so relaxing, but it seemed that his return from la la land wasn't going to be pleasant.

Raito was just wondering where he was and what happened when he was bombarded with memories.

'That's right…I was in Mu…then the Shinigami King took me out…made me into a hybrid shinigami…took me to meet the little mother…then they gave me a note, a lifenote…then pain oh god time traveling hurts, remind me never to do that again…let's see after that I merged with my younger self, ah that was painful too, what is it with redemption and pain anyway? Is this like a test of my pain threshold or something? Geez…after that…Oh god that nightmare…shit that's going to haunt me for a while yet…Zaki…hn figures that the notes would have a live core…I mean with all that other weird shit that's been happening to me lately the idea of my lifenote having a sentinel being in it isn't really that surprising…but why did he half to take on the form of Ryuzaki? I know that Ryuzaki is the only one I really got along with, at least in some twisted way because at the time we were trying to kill each other…but not this time…this time I will not become Kira! I will strive to get L to trust me and then we…what? Become real friends? Ahh I don't know! I'll just have to deal with it when I get there.'

While Raito had been remembering what had happen he failed to notice the commotion that was taking place next to him.

He only really became aware of his surroundings when he heard a voice say.

"-ok hand me the crash panels…"

With that quick phrase Raito deemed it would be beneficial to his health if he alerted the others of his waken state. So Raito still with his eyes closed and not moving an inch said in a calm controlled manner.

"Ryuzaki if you value your family jewels then I wouldn't even think about trying to shock me awake, especially since I'm already awake."

Silence.

"Raito-kun is very unpleasant when he wakes up; it seems that we will not need the crash cart after all. You may take it away Watari."

Raito struggled to regain his senses as he slowly rose from the couch that was sitting in the middle of the control room. It seemed that someone had decided that he deserved some comfort when he had been in his light coma like state.

'More then likely my dad and the others decided that. Ryuzaki would have been just as happy with leaving me in that hard cold unforgiving cell. Asshole.'

Raito started to look around. He was startled to see that only Ryuzaki and Watari were with him in the room.

"Where are my dad and the others?"

"Ah I sent them to wait outside. Your father was getting a bit hysterical and the others weren't helping so I made Watari take them to the room next door. I guess I should tell them your awake…your father's most likely has already broken the door that I locked them in with."

Raito just stared at Ryuzaki for a moment.

"You locked my father in a room while I was passed out?! Are you trying to give him a heart attack or something!?"

Ryuzaki gave him a withering look.

"No Yagami-kun I was not trying to kill Yagami-san, I just didn't want him to get in the way of me trying to wake you."

Raito flushed somewhat, which mortified him like nothing else. He had never given himself away by facial expressions before. And it showed because Ryuzaki suddenly looked in wonder at Raito's uncharacteristic display of emotion.

Raito noted that Ryuzaki had called him Yagami-kun instead of Raito-kun.

'Probably mad at me for questioning his royal ass, he should know by now that I'm no simple minded lackey of his. So…I wonder how I'm going to explain the attack?'

Before they got the chance to start bickering again the door that connected the control room to the hallway burst open.

"Don't worry Raito! I will help you, I won't let that pervert use electric shock on you…"

Yagami broke off mid sentence when he saw his son sitting up and looking at him with a startled look on his face.

There was a more then slightly uncomfortable silence for a minute before Raito decided to end it by giving his father a way out. Though Raito had to admit the expression that Ryuzaki wore at being called a pervert by his father was priceless. At any other time Raito would have had to discard his polite mask and laughed himself silly.

"Hello father, yes I'm awake, yes I feel fine, no Ryuzaki didn't use the crash panels on me. I must have had a small panic attack; it's not that unlikely considering the pressure that we are in. But I'm alright now and I don't feel any side effects, so everything's ok now."

Yagami still looked worried but had calmed down some when Raito started talking. After Raito was done speaking Yagami looked like he would melt into the floor with relief. His worried worn face relaxed into a much more pleasant expression.

"Are you sure Raito? Because Kira investigation or no Kira investigation I will not let your health be effected, you are my son and will always come first."

At any other time the way his father was acting would have annoyed him, but now all it did was warm him from the inside out. Raito started to really look at the people around him. After his father had stormed inside the room the other people in the investigation had been quick to follow. While his father and the others started to ague with L about locking them in a room, Raito took the time to examine everyone and to come up with a plan of action.

His father looked just like he remembered him. But Raito noticed that he looked at lot more worn and tired then the first time…or was it that Raito was only just now paying attention? Raito felt a flash of guilt and shame. When he had been bent on world conquest he had not given his family a second thought. He resolved to change that this time.

He turned his attention to the others. Aizawa looked the same as ever, still had that ridicules afro hairdo. Raito was only slightly comfortable remembering that Aizawa gets it all cut off in the near future. Mogi was still a silent giant as ever, watching everything and everyone. Matsuda was…well nothing had changed at all about Matsuda, funnily enough Raito felt no resentment over the fact that Matsuda had shot him. Matsuda was Matsuda and that was enough for Raito.

Watari had come back into the room. Probably had to take the time to hide the evidence that L had wanted to shock Raito awake.

Thinking about that Raito couldn't help but be puzzled. Why would Ryuzaki want to electrocute him? He knew that L didn't have that much patience but still, to use such drastic measures to wake him up? Why would he-

Then Raito remembered what his Lifenote Zaki had said. Before passing out in pain he had called out L's true name.

'Shit, shit, double freaking shit. Not only did L hear me say his name, which I shouldn't know but Matsuda also heard me. God damn it will the freaking universe give me a freaking break?!'

What happened next seemed to answer his question and not in a positive way for Raito.

"Hey Raito-kun, I wanted to ask you, who's name did you callout earlier? What was it…Lawliet or something like that?"

Everyone became silent as they all looked at Matsuda in confusion except for three people. Raito who was trying to keep the panic he was feeling from showing tried to put on a mask of confusion too, in the hopes that it would seemed that he had no idea what Matsuda was saying. The other two people who did not have any confusion on their faces were L and Watari. They both weren't even looking at Matsuda; they were both staring at Raito.

Raito didn't really know what to do; he hadn't really had the time to format a plan at all. Everything just seemed to happen so fast. So Raito did the only thing he could think of.

He played dumb.

"What are you talking about Matsuda? I don't remember saying anything, unless you mean me screaming in pain?"

Matsuda flushed in embarrassment, but did not give up like Raito had been hoping he would.

"No I heard you, you said someone's name…I know you did…didn't anyone else hear anything?"

Matsuda looked around the room hopefully, but was discouraged to see everyone else shake their heads negative. He then looked at L and Watari hopefully.

"How about you Ryuzaki-san? You were right beside me, surly you heard Raito-kun?"

Raito held his breath as everyone looked at L with curious expressions on their faces. L's face was blank, the look he got when he was thinking about something really hard. His arm came up and he started to naw on his thumb.

Raito had the strangest urge right then. He wanted to get up from the couch and go over to Ryuzaki and take that poor neglected thumb from Ryuzaki's sharp teeth and…put it into his own mouth?!

'What the hell?! I did not just…ok maybe it's like a maternity feeling…yes Ryuzaki is just like a child and if he continues to naw on that thumb much longer it will start to bleed…it's normal to want to smooth it with my tongue…NO IT ISN'T!!'

While Raito was feeling like his head was going to explode, not to mention he was beating down a truly extraordinary blush, L decided to finally answer.

"No I don't really remember Raito-kun saying anything, he wouldn't really have been able to anyway Matsuda, he was to busy screaming. Maybe the stress is getting to you, it defiantly seems to be getting to Raito-kun here…"

Matsuda blushed horribly and sat down on one of the chairs, chastised.

Raito only felt a brief flash of pity for him, because he had truly heard Raito say something. It was just something that no one should have heard.

Watari had moved over towards Raito while the others started to chastise Matsuda on wasting time on things he imagined he heard.

"Are you sure you are ok Yagami-kun? If you need to we could move you down to the 7th floor infirmity. We could also get you a discrete doctor if you are feeling any after effects from your attack."

Raito was shocked at Watari's caring altitude directed towards him. Though he really shouldn't be, Watari was a considerate nice man; Raito felt another wave of guilt at the idea that he had also caused this kind old man's death.

"No thank you Watari-san; that will not be necessary I feel find if a little tired and hungry."

"Well then I will fetch you some supper, it's not surprising that you are hungry, you have been out of it for almost 17 hours."

Raito felt shocked at that detail.

"17 hours?!"

Ryuzaki finally seemed to break away from his co-workers that seemed to be not so discreetly screaming for his blood and walked over to were Raito and Watari were talking, he came next to Watari just as Raito had exclaimed his shock.

"Yes Yagami-kun you have been out for almost a day, so you can understand our concern. Now let me go get dinner for everyone, I don't think anyone else has the energy to go out to get take-out."

With that said Watari took his leave out the door, just before he left though he gave L unreadable look. L seemed to get the message and heaved a heavily put out sigh.

"Well now that it seems that Raito-kun is awake and appears to be undamaged let's just go back to work, Aizawa-san if you would please handcuff and blindfold Raito-kun we should-"

L never had the chance to continue because the room became an uproar of protesting voices. Yagami being the loudest.

"No you will not be putting my son back into that cell! It was what probably made him have that attack, not to mention you accusing him again and again of being Kira! I will not let my son go back under those conditions. Next time we might not be this lucky! So you better come up with another idea L-san because confiding my son isn't going to work."

Everyone else seemed to also agree with what Yagami was saying. Surprisingly it was Mogi that mention that if Raito was suffering from confinement and isolation than Misa might also have an attack soon. The others in the group quickly decided that Misa should also be released.

Raito could tell that Ryuzaki was really getting annoyed. To anyone else it would seem that Ryuzaki was just standing there with a blank facial expression, just listening to his co-workers ague about his methods. To Raito's eyes he could see that Ryuzaki's shoulders were hunched over a bit more then they usually were, and his head was titled to the side just a bit in what was a clear signal of frustration, also his lips were just a bit plushed around his thumb. Signaling that he was most likely tearing into his skin a lot harder then normal.

Raito decided to head off the enviable explosion before it could build up any more.

"Father, everyone please, I want to thank you for all of your concern but have you forgotten why I and Misa were confined for? Ryuzaki can not release us till he is 100 percent certain that neither of us are Kira. I know and you know that I am not Kira, but we all know how stubborn Ryuzaki is. And if it proves us innocent then health be damned."

Everyone seemed to be in a bit in shock after Raito's little speech; even Ryuzaki was looking a little startled. After a moment Ryuzaki gave Raito a small smile of gratitude and heaved another smaller sigh this time before turning towards the others of the group and addressed them.

"I took your protests under consideration earlier, yes Matsuda I knew you would protest, now as I was saying I knew that you would no longer support my decision of having Raito-kun and Misa Misa under confinement and I have taken it under consideration. We all know that the killings stopped for a while after Raito-kun's and Misa Misa's confinement but they have started to resume again as you well know. While that does not get you off the hook Raito-kun at all, I can not have you locked up if it will affect your health…so I had Watari make these especially for an occasion like this."

With that said Ryuzaki started to dig around in his rather large pants pockets and finally pulled something out.

A long set of handcuffs.

After that the shouting started again.

--

**Edited-10/30/08**

Ok I finally found a place to stop. My god, look at the size of this chapter! Man, this is what happens when you get wondrous reviews from readers and you drink at least 4 servings of AMP caffeinated energy drinks and two boxes of pocky…it's like Frankenstein's monster…it's alive it's alive! Hehe sorry still kind of jittery.

Ok I don't know where Zaki came from…hell I don't really know where the whole nightmare scene came from, it was only suppose to be 5 pages long 6 tops! Instead it turned out 20 pages long; this whole chapter is at least 25 pages long. It just got away from me I guess…anyway thank you all who have reviewed. This extra long chapter is for all of my very patient readers who have been waiting a lot longer then I promised it would be. Oww my head hurts…(hint pity the poor writer and review to make her feel better.)

I hope you all like it…I know it might seem like I'm rushing through things but I'm not really, a lot of stuff needs to happen before I can get to a plot…yes you heard me I said PLOT! I have a half formed idea in my head of where this story will be going…and I have to say it will defiantly be original…most likely because I don't know if anyone else would do something so utterly insane (actually I kind of like it but shrugs can't let my muse hear that or she'll get a swelled head)

Please review!! I will not start writing the next chapter till I get **25 more reviews! **Yes you heard me **25**! And I will cry tears of joy if it exceeds that. HINT HINT

Tell me what you think please…do you like the way this story is going? Do you like how Raito and the other's have acted so far? How about L, do you like him? Do you like my OC Zaki? He's like my Little Mother character I didn't know about him till he introduced himself. Talk to me people!!

PUSH THE PURPLE BUTTON! (Uses the hypnotic powers that the caffeine has given her)


	6. Chapter 6

Warnings: not much, some bad language, tiny bit of humor, ummm Misa?

I got a shorter number of reivews then I had hoped but...I would just like to say to all my readers that I will never stop or stall my story just because only a fewer people reviewed then I had hoped, I'm not that kind of writer, for one my readers just might kill me for that, (the ones that did I just want to say that I love you and I will continue my story no matter what just for you all-) I have to admit that I'm disappointed but oh well…maybe you could review this chapter…a lot. HINT. The more reviews the bigger the chapters (I'm not kidding, reviews really do help me write)

Also I just can't help it…I love how Raito and Ryuzaki were handcuffed in the manga…so it might not be as original as my story seems to be becoming but…they just have to be handcuffed together, the sooner the better. (Perverted mind, you know your no different) heh

Ok I did not like how this chapter turned out…it seems like I am rushing through things a bit quickly…not to mention that the characters are acting a bit more OCC then I would like…well I am suffering from a terrible cold…let's just chalk it up to that. Please review and tell me if my characters are getting to out of character. Remember this story is for all of you…so talk to me…please?

--

After much more shouting, and in Raito's case just plan staring, it was agreed on that Raito would be handcuffed to Ryuzaki 24/7 and Misa would be under 24 hour surveillance but in a more comfortable setting.

Yagami still wasn't pleased with the idea but believed that this would be the best choice to take; it was either that or have his son back in that inferno cell.

It began to get really late, it had been yesterday afternoon when Raito had collapsed screaming in his cell, now it was almost 3 o'clock in the morning, and a whole new day was starting.

But sadly for Raito who was now chained to a frustrated, insomniac detective who seemed to be really mad at him the day was far from over.

It had been finally been decided after Watari had come back with food for everyone and had walked into a room that was nothing but chaos and mayhem, he had quickly sat the food down then proceed to walked towards one of the file cabinets that lined one of the four walls. He had then proceeded to pulled out what seemed to be…a horn buzzer.

After everyone's ears had stopped ringing no one dared to speak again till Watari deemed it necessary.

After hearing both arguments on both sides, well more like how everyone was against whatever Ryuzaki had planned, Watari calmly took control of the situation.

He got the others at the investigation to see the situation as it was. Raito Yagami was a suspect. A suspect of being one of the worse serial killers known to man. It was that simple. And it was actually quite generous of L to even think of letting him out of the cell, health or no health. The same went with Misa, probably even more so because L had some physical evidence against her. With much grumbling and protest the others at in the investigation agreed that it would be the best case scenario to let Raito be handcuffed to Ryuzaki.

Yagami had only grimly agreed to the idea but said he would only agree to the idea fully if his son also agrees with Ryuzaki's idea.

At that declaration all eyes turned to the startled Raito.

While everyone had been yelling and arguing about what to do with himself and Misa, Raito had been examining Ryuzaki and thinking.

'Hn I can't believe that I'm already going to be handcuffed to Ryuzaki…what about my fifty day incarnation? If my calculations are correct then it's only been about a week since Ryuzaki had me locked up. Even when I really had lost my memories of the Deathnote and became my more innocent self he still left me in that damned cell for almost two months. And what about that goddamned test? Oh god how I wanted to hurt him for that…I mean what kind of twisted person came up with an idea to have a father pretend to kill his own son? Someone with some twisted sense of morals that's what, I still get feverous around guns…but I can't really talk can I? I mean I killed thousands of people under the pretense of bettering the world…when I just wanted to rule over it…huh kind of makes wonder which one of us is the more devious…heh it would be kind of fun to find out…he just gets so cute when he's all competitive…wait what!? Shit I'm doing it again, Ryuzaki is not cute! Get that threw your brain you overly hormonal piece of junk! He's your enemy at worse and your best friend at best! That-is-all!'

Raito tried to convince himself that that was all Ryuzaki could ever be. It didn't really work though.

'I mean…he couldn't be more then that…can he? Well let's see, negative traits of L is well he's messy, he has bad posture, he's an insomniac, he eats nothing but sugar…and he's childish, bossy, native, and....but aren't those also things that I dare I say it find endearing? Arggg! Damn it you obvious insomniac socially challenged panda! Look at what you did to me! I'm gibbering like a blushing school girl over her first crush! Oh my god…that's exactly what I'm acting like…oh thank god I perfected my facial expressions years ago or I would have to explain to everyone here why I have the expression of someone who found out that they had a sex change and no one told them about it…ok that was weird, maybe Mu did do something to me, I'm thinking like a crazy person. Ok back to the discussion on hand. I might, just might have a small crush on Ryuzaki…a really really small almost microscopic crush. So sure he's kind of cute in an almost panda bear sort of way and the way his eyes widen in confusion sometimes is absolutely adorable, and he does have a very nice body once you get him to discard those horrid cloths and…that's it! I'm going to revolt on my brain! Geez ok ok I admit that's he's hot! Ok I admit it so leave me alone about it! I need to focus on more important matters, like now that I have perpetually denounced the deathnote and Kira what will happen now?'

Raito was glad that his mind had settled on a more comfortable topic. If you count thinking about who will try to become the new god of the world and might just kill thousands of people like him comforting. Raito found that so, at least a lot more comforting then confronting his newfound hormonal like feelings for a certain wide eye detective.

Raito had been startled out of his thoughts, right when his mind finally got out of its L gutter too, when his father had announced that he would only agree with Ryuzaki's idea if Raito also agreed.

When everyone's eyes had turned to him Raito had frantically tried to remember what they had even been discussing. He had been so deep in thought that he had blocked everything that had been going on around him.

Only after taking a quick look around the room and spotting the handcuffs that were still dangling from Ryuzaki's limp hand did he suddenly remember.

"I have to say that what Ryuzaki is offering is really generous father, not only do I get out of that cell I will be able to help with the investigation…with the capture of the real Kira."

When he was talking to the team he could have sworn that Ryuzaki had snorted in disbelief at that last bit.

Raito felt determination fill him at the sound.

'Well let him think what he will. I will prove that I'm not Kira…because I'm really not anymore. I will get you to trust me Ryuzaki, you can bet your name on it.'

--

After that had been all decided, things had finally started too settled down.

At least until Watari had come back with Misa.

"RAITO!!"

'Oh shit.'

That was all that Raito had time to think of before he was tackled to the floor.

Ryuzaki, who had already linked them together with the handcuffs, also had the unfortunate luck to be yanked down.

So for Raito it was with a highly embarrassing scene that they made.

He was on the floor with a hyper Misa talking a mile a minute about how that now that their free from the evil love separating Ryuzaki that they need to start making wedding plans and what name should their first child be?

Raito who had been out of breath after being tackled by Misa, not to mention Ryuzaki who had also fallen on top of them both. It struck Raito as odd that Misa had yet to notice that she was sandwiched between them, but chalked it up to Misa just being her usually stupid obvious self.

After listening to what Misa was saying though Raito didn't care how embarrassed he was. He wanted the crazy bitch off him. NOW.

After giving the still gibbering Misa a quick shove, which had ironically pushed her into Ryuzaki who had been trying to get up the entire time, but had been unsuccessful thanks to the handcuffs he himself had put on.

Raito managed to avoid also getting thrown back into the dog pile only by planting his feet in the carpet. He figured his slightly bleeding wrist was worth it.

Raito had managed to get up unsteadily to his feet while the other two where still in a tangle on the ground.

Raito had to snicker when a loud slap resounded in the room. It seemed Misa had finally noticed Ryuzaki.

Turning towards his father candidly ignoring the accuses of how Ryuzaki was a pervert and how dare he touch Misa, and how her Raito would be really jealous.

Snorting himself at that last bit, he started to talk to his father and Watari about how Misa should be locked in an apartment on one of the floors for a few days. At least till they all had time to think of a better idea.

Again bluntly ignoring Misa's whining and nauseating flirting he asked Aizawa to go with Watari and find a room with cameras that they could put Misa in, at least until they created a apartment especially for her. Not matter that Raito knew that Misa at the moment was innocent of any wrongdoings, well if you don't call stalking and almost blackmailing Raito to be her boyfriend wrong.

Ryuzaki finally managed to untangle himself from the flaring Misa and stood up also leaving Misa to whine on the ground about how her Raito should help her up. Raito noticed that Ryuzaki didn't really seem too pleased at him for taking charge of his investigation. Raito could tell because he felt the daggers that Ryuzaki seemed to be planting in his back with his eyes.

Turning to him and shrugging in apology and walked the small distance back towards L and gave his a sheepish look and mimic zipping his mouth shut.

L seemed to take the apology because he nodded to him. Turning around and also ignoring the yelling Misa who was being pulled out of the room by an exhausted looking Aizawa.

"While I don't like how you tried to take control of my team in the first few minutes of your new found freedom Raito-kun, you do make a point. We should discuss where to put Misa at a later date. For now we will put her in one of the many guest bedrooms since they all have cameras and locks in them. I will have Watari make a room for her at a later date. For now it is late and I'm sure that many of you will want to get home to sleep and see your families…actually why don't you take the day off tomorrow, spend time with your families, and just make sure your on time for work the next day. Criminals are still being killed we must not forget that. Now if you will excuse us."

With that Ryuzaki started to leave the room, pulling the unresisting Raito with him. He just had enough time to call out a hopefully reinsurance to his father who seemed to want to protest again.

"I'll see you when you get back father, please try to relax for the day and take mom and Sayu out for some quality time. I'm sure they miss you. Goodnight."

Raito barely had enough time to say goodnight before Ryuzaki yanked him out the door.

"Ryuzaki please, there's no need to be violent. By the way where are we going?"

Ryuzaki didn't even pause as he walked into the elevator that was at the end of the hall.

When they were both in the elevator Ryuzaki finally spoke. What he said reminded Raito that he was still in deep shit.

"We have a private matter that we must discuss Kira-san. On what you really know and don't know. Like what you said before you passed out."

Raito froze.

'Shit, shit, goddamn it! How could I forget about that?! Damn Raito great job! What kind of genius are you anyway? Not a very smart one that's for sure. What the hell am I going to say? The truth? No not yet, maybe not ever. For now I need to gain his trust and friendship, after that, maybe I could tell him about…everything. The little mother gave me the gift, the choice of making one person immortal like me…my soul mate. Heh I can't believe it took me this long to figure out that I want L to be that person, no not L…Lawliet. I want Lawliet by my side for all eternity. I mean I know that we ague and fight all the time...but that's what makes our messed up friendship fun. Now what do I do right now though? Hmm well I guess I can still play the dumb card for now. At least until I got a better feel on what kind of mood Ryuzaki's in right now. Though I got to say it must be a truly pissed off one if he's calling me Kira. Well let's get this fight rolling…I wonder if we're going to get in a fist fight…god I hope so, I need to vent.'

While Raito had been contemplating on what to say Ryuzaki had been patiently staring unblinking at him. When Raito had finally come to a decision, it had only taken 10 seconds tops but even that was to long, he was unnerved with how the way Ryuzaki had been looking at him.

'Is it just me or is it suddenly to warm in here?' Raito couldn't help but think before speaking.

"I don't know what your talking about Ryuzaki but I do know that I'm not Kira so don't call me that!"

Ryuzaki just gave him an unimpressed look.

"You know exactly what I'm talking about…Kira-kun."

Before Raito could respond back with a biting insult the doors of the elevator opened up to admit them onto a floor that Raito was unfamiliar with.

Before Raito could once again ask where they were he was pulled forcefully by Ryuzaki from the elevator and pulled harshly to the only door that the floor seemed to have.

It was a plain unremarkable door, but just looking at it gave Raito the shivers. He felt that once they got threw that door Ryuzaki's and his relationship will never be the same…and he didn't know if it would be for the better or worse.

Ryuzaki pulled a key out of his pocket and without looking at Raito he unlocked the door and walked threw it.

Raito had no choice but to follow.

--

**Edited - 11/13/08**

Well I think I will end it there. I know I promised some of my reviewers that the big fight scene would be in this chapter but I really don't feel up to it. I promise though it is in the next chapter and I will have that chapter up soon. THAT I DO PROMISE YOU. Truthfully I just wanted to post this chapter up so much that I couldn't help but end it there. And you have admit it that it is a good cliffhanger. Heh. Maybe it will help all those people who read my story but don't review to leave a comment. (Insert evil writers laugh)MUHAHAHAHAHAH.

I am sorry that it is not as long as the previously two chapters but like I said I'm feeling vindictive and righteously pissed off. Also I am sick, and I don't know if I could do that part justice if I'm all woozy and stuff. The fight scene is really, really important to the story.

Also I'm no longer putting up deadlines. I mean I say I'll post the chapter in a week and in two days I'm like dying to put up a new chapter. Also I might also say I would have a chapter in a week and then post the next chapter a month later. So no more deadlines, I'll post when I want to. But like I keep saying…**MORE REVIEWS EQUALS LONGER BETTER CHAPTERS!! **

Please tell me what you think and if you want to guess what happens next it would be fun to see who is the closes to guessing to what actually happens...(Giggles manically.)It's the cold meds, they mess with my head.

So anyway please review, I'm going to take a short nap right now and I hope by the time I wake up that I will feel a bit better to work properly on the next chapter.


	7. Chapter 7

Warnings: really pissed off L, some Angst, and Bad language again (you can expect this warning in every chapter), **violence**, some humor, also some fluff, yep you heard my I said **FLUFF**. (Not in this order)

Ok this **extra** **huge** chapter is dedicated to Pouf, who is such a wonderful person that reviewed almost instantly to my last chapter, and it made me feel so much better, enough so that I could start write down this chapter. So you all better thank her for this really long ass chapter. Also thank you to all who have also reviewed my last chapter (and any other chapter too) you know who you are :-)

Also if you have already reviewed a chapter and have any additional questions at all or just feel like chatting with me please feel free to PM me at anytime, I will try to respond quickly. (Very lonely writer here)

So without further ado let's continue where we all left L and Raito…heheh

--

Ryuzaki didn't say anything after entering the room, so Raito believed it would be safe enough to take a quick to look around before trying to address the problem at hand.

At first glance it looked like he was staring at nothing, nothing at all but glaring endless white space. After his eyes had adjusted to the glaring whiteness he was able to identify what he had missed at first glance.

The room itself was in a perfectly square shape, evident white walls lined the four corners that made up the enclosed area, the room also had no windows or any other type of entry point expect for the one door which they had come threw, and it was also quite small, there was barely enough room to pace 10 or so steps back and forth, also there was no furniture or any type of chair or table in the entire room. It was a completely empty sterile room.

Raito felt cold chills go up and down his spin as soon as he entered the room. Quickly coming up with a terrifying theory he frantically looked around for any signs of hidden cameras or things of that nature. His heart sank.

There was nothing. Nothing at all.

Raito quickly tried to back out the door before it closed. But Ryuzaki who seemed to follow his trail of thought quickly yanked the chain forward, knocking Raito into him and had the desired effect of bringing Raito into the room completely. Ryuzaki quickly put his arms around Raito to help steady both of them to keep them from falling to the ground.

Raito quickly pushed himself from where he had fallen into Ryuzaki and looked at the door frantically. His eyes grew wide.

Where once there was a door was now nothing but a seamless white wall.

One thought crossed Raito's mind while the rest of his brain seemed to be frozen in a blank form of terror.

'Oh shit.'

--

Raito just stared at where the door had been just moments ago, as if just willing the door to come back will make it appear.

"Ahem"

Raito slowly turned around to look at the emotionless faced Ryuzaki. No, the person who was standing in front of him was no longer the Ryuzaki that he knew, at this moment…the person that Raito was now facing was the world's greatest detective…L.

'Oh, double shit.'

Raito decided that he would try to deny everything as long as he could. Which in reality didn't seem like it would be long, at least not with the look that L was now sporting.

"If you are done staring stupidly at the wall Raito-kun, I believe we have much to discuss, but first…"

Before Raito could once again replay to L's harsh insults he was interrupted, this time by L who was again digging into his pants. This time he pulled out a different key, this one was really small and was a silvery color.

L then proceeded to unlock his side of the cuffs from his wrist. He then looked at Raito expectantly.

When Raito just stared at him with a look of uncertainly and confusion, L gave a huff of aggravation and moved towards the unmoving form of his suspect, then proceeded to take Raito's unresisting hand and uncuffed him as well.

He then put both the handcuffs and the key that unlocked them back into his seemingly bottomless pocket.

Raito was continuelessly trying to come up with a plan of attack or at least a good enough justification for his defense. But it was hard, because for some reason he was scared. His brain scoffed at the idea of being scared of L, that there was no reason to be afraid of him, it knew that L no matter what would not harm him, but for some reason his body wouldn't respond to that reinsurance.

'I've got to calm down, L might be a manipulative bastard but he wouldn't do anything too damaging to me, and this time I can fight back if he does anything to…to what? Hell I don't know what goes threw that sugar addle mind of his, I'm not sure I want to know. Why would he take me to a room without any type of camera or any kind of escape route, what is he planning? God I hope we can skip the mental attacks that are bound to happen between us and just have a good old fashion throw down. My fight with Kira wasn't nearly as satisfying as mine and L's usual past fights. God, what kind of sick individual am I to think that? Well what happens now is all up to fate I guess…hah yea right. When have I ever let fate dictate my life for me? I take my own fate in my own hands, this will be no different. I will get L to see me for me. The person that I am right now. Not the Raito…Kira that he knew before.'

"So L…what exactly are we doing in here?"

While Raito had been preoccupied with his thoughts L had moved to the far side of the room, he was currently leaning on the opposite wall of where Raito was. The room that they now seemed to be stuck in suddenly had the stifling air of a showdown. Raito had a sudden urge to whistle a tune he had once heard in an American western movie that he had saw as a child. The one where two gunmen had been facing off against each other and tumble weeds seemed to almost silently breeze by. He quickly shook that urge away, but couldn't help but be mildly amused at himself for finding humor in this tense situation.

Raito was suddenly shaken from his internal amusement as a sudden noise filled the air.

Raito couldn't help but gap at the smirk that now L was now sporting, the previous unemotional mask that L had been wearing was gone completely.

L…who was now whistling the same American western theme song that Raito had just been thinking himself of whistling, the same one that fitted their standoff so well.

After finally getting over his shock of the fact that L was actually whistling, even more he was whistling in a tense situation.

Or what had once been a tense situation.

Raito couldn't help but let out a small laugh. Even the idea of the stoic L actually having the nerve to do that was unbelievable. But to have him actually do it was something else. It was really funny.

L's smirk turned into a small smile as he got the desired effect that he had been aiming for.

Raito was amazed. Why would L go to the trouble to make Raito feel more relaxed? Especially if he had not even 5 minutes ago been really angry at Raito?

'I keep on forgetting that L is full of surprises, he's as unpredictable as me sometimes. I can't believe that he had the same tune stuck in his head as me…no…that shouldn't shock me, we are alike after all. Even though it may not look like it, we think on almost the same thought pattern. Heh how interesting, let's see where he's going to go with this now that he got me to _relax_. I don't think we need to be on friendly terms quite yet…maybe a bit of mental sparing _is_ just what we need before anything else.'

The fear that Raito had been feeling earlier has completely dissolved like it had never been there in the first place. He had no clue on why he had felt it in the first place but he was glad that it was gone now. He wouldn't be able to enjoy any type of spar with L if he had been holding back because of some nameless fear.

"I can't believe that you also had that tune going threw your head Ryuzaki."

"Yes well, it seemed appropriate somehow, Raito-kun."

Raito raised his eyebrow while inside he was smirking in triumph. It was time for him to unexpectedly turn the tables on L.

"What? No more Kira-kun? Have a change of heart...L." Raito pasted a fake innocent smile. He quickly put on his polite mask that he wore for the rest of the world. The one that everyone else but L seemed to believe was really him.

L's eyes narrowed, and after a moment he titled his head in a slight nod.

It seemed he understood Raito's challenge and accepted.

Now there was only the game, the game to see which one of them broke their mask before the other.

--

"So Raito-kun…how about you tell me now on how you acquired that name?"

Raito expected the question, and wasn't surprised at all that it was the first question that L had asked, since it was kind of fun being able to playing dumb, at least on this subject and it had the added benefit of pissing L off he decided to continue doing just that for a while. At least until L found either a more creative way of asking, or until Raito got tired of faking it.

"I really don't have a clue as to what you are talking about. Wait are you talking about what Matsuda said? Really L, you don't actually believe that he really heard anything do you? How would I even be able to call out a name when I was to busy crying out in pain? Not to mention I have no memory of doing anything of the sort. Now why don't you answer a real question…like where in the seven hells are we?"

L seemed to expect his answer. They were playing the game after all. It would be no fun on either side if someone broke too easily or too early.

"First off my question is a legitimate question, but to answer yours this is a secure room I had made sure to have built for such a case, when I had the building created. It is virtually an inescapable room. There is no other way out then that one door that we had just came in threw, but it can only be opened from the outside. This entire floor is actually not on any of the buildings blue prints and only myself and Watari know about it. First off you need to know the right entry code when you enter the elevator and it changes randomly every 10 hours, only Watari's and my cell phone is sent the new code numbers. After that you need to have the key and right now I have the only one. Watari has a spare but I believe that its location right now is somewhere in Europe. Also you may not have noticed this but there was a retnal scanner that scanned my eye before the door had opened. I wouldn't be surprised if you hadn't noticed. The scanner is virtually naked to the human eye. You have to stand at my crouched height and stare at a certain point on the door. Only mine and Watari's eyes can also open the door. After the door closes it is impossible to open it from this side. We are sealed in here until I give the correct access number into my phone to Watari. Who will then express mail the spare key which should only take a few hours to get here by a jet stream plane that would deliver it to a secure location for Watari to pick up, and I will only send the code when my questions have been answered satisfactory."

Raito just uncomprehendingly stared.

"Wait-your saying that we're locked in here without food or water or anything like that for who knows how long especially with your pig-headedness, not to mention if what you say is true and this room is as sealed as you say…what the hell are we going to do about our air supply?!"

"Oh yes I forgot to mention, while this room is very, very secure there are microscopic airways that filter clean air in and out of this room, but there are also 20 foot thick stain steel walls behind the outer walls. So there is no possible way to dig yourself out Raito-kun, even with proper tools. Now I answered your question honestly Raito-kun…why don't you do the same."

Raito was speechless. To think that L would go this far…he had not predicted it at all.

Raito couldn't stop the shiver of....something from coursed threw him.

It felt like…excitement?

'Yes…that sounds about right. I haven't been challenged like this for so long, I missed it. I missed you L, and this time I'm not going to let you go.'

--

Raito had figured that L would keep at his question, well he had hoped that L would at least tire of it, but that didn't seem like the case. No matter how much he dodged the question L would always bring it back up almost eminently.

Frankly it was starting to piss Raito off.

"Gods, will you stop it already? I've already given you my answer to your blasted question over 139 times! Could we just please move on?!"

Raito hated to break first on this matter but frankly he was almost too frustrated to care at this point.

L just smirked in satisfaction at the break in Raito's polite mask, the frustrated that he was clearly feeling had leaked out a bit into his voice.

Gods Raito just wanted to punch him in the face, to wipe that smug look right off.

But no, it had only been 7 hours since they had been stuck in the room. Raito couldn't help but be happy that his body had gone to the restroom and had eaten just right before he had the attack. He may have been asleep for over 17 hours but it seemed that some of his shinigami powers were the ability to go long periods of time without the need for such human basic functions.

'Heh L himself is probably trying to find out the answer to why I'm doing so well at the moment. Any other human would have broken at this point. It's been almost 24 hours since I had any kind of water or food. He's probably confused as hell right now. Well serves him right for doing such a stupid thing as this. Heh I wonder how _he's_ doing? I bet this is the longest he has gone without some type of sugary substance. Hahahaha he is most likely suffering right now. To bad he's so good at his own type of mask. I would love to see the suffering look right now. I may care for him and all but I'm still wicked enough that when he brings suffering to himself I'll just sit back a laugh at his own foolishness. But still…how many times will he ask the same fucking question?!'

"Until Raito-kun answers my question I will continue to ask it."

Raito gave an internal sigh of disgust and as much as he hated to admit it admiration.

Raito decided to give, at least a little. He couldn't help but be impressed with how L was handling all of this. Even though it was had been his own idea and he was most likely suffering L didn't show it at all. But still, Raito wasn't going to just cave in. Not until L himself at least caved some a little first.

But why not make this stalemate more interesting?

'The question is though, how much should I give him? Hmmm I'm having way more fun then I should be, at least under these circumstances. I mean just one slip up could land me in a cell for the rest of my life…but there are no cameras here…so it would just be L's word against mine, and if anyone found out the circumstances that had led to any type of confession…most likely it would be discarded as a desperate lie to get out of this room…L must know this…so why? Why go threw all this? I could understand it if we were in an interrogation room or even a modern type of torture chamber, heck even a medieval torture chamber wouldn't have surprised me more then the situation we are in now. I mean…he hasn't even really done anything to me expect ask me a question…nothing else. Well all I can do is ask…might as well it will at least get us off the topic about me knowing his real name.'

Raito finally sat up from his laying position on the ground. After 4 hours of standing and trying to outlast L at being who could withstand standing for hours on end, he managed to win by 30 minutes before he had to collapse onto his side of the room.

That was something that also hadn't changed in the 7 hours of bickering back and forth. They each stayed on the opposite sides of the room from each other, keeping as much distance as possible. Most likely because they would have not been able to stop themselves from starting a fist fight if they had been to close to one another. Either that or they were making the slight space that they had from each other last. Neither of them forgot that the moment they left this room they would have to put the handcuffs back on indefinitely.

"Why are you doing this L? I mean no matter what I say or don't say you can't convict me as Kira…you'd have no evidence or anything like that…so why? Why would you put us both threw this torment? At least if you'd have anything to gain I would kind of understand this situation, but you couldn't possible be getting anything other then sugar withdraws right now."

L looked at Raito, as if weighing the pros and cons of answering the question.

Because if he answered Raito knew that L would be telling the truth. It was part of the game after all. Raito would lie and avoid any and all questions that he deemed incriminating and L would try to catch him in the act, but L would always answer truthfully or at least to the questions that he deemed worthy to answer anyway…why, Raito didn't know but it was kind of refreshing that at least one of them wasn't outright lying.

Finally L sighed and then proceeded to slowly get to his feet from his crouched position that he had adopted earlier when they had entered.

Raito who was startled to see L on the move, since in almost the entire time they have been in here he had not moved all that much. Raito hesitated for only a second before also getting up onto his feet.

It wouldn't do for L to have height advantage over him right now.

L was still staring at him silently as if evaluating if he was worthy to know the reason for all this madness.

After another few minutes of tense silence pasted before L finally spoke. His voice was hesitant and unsure, something that greatly startled and strangely upset Raito. It didn't sound like L at all.

"Would you like to know the truth Raito-kun? Yes, I imagine you do…even though you won't give me the same courtesy I will tell you....the reason why we are in this room has nothing to do with the Kira case."

Shocked silence filled the room.

Raito didn't know what his expression that was currently on his face might look like but if he had to guess it would probably greatly resemble a landed fish.

"Wh-what?!"

L being the bastard that he was had the nerve to actually chuckle at Raito's expression and stutter.

"You heard me Raito-kun; we are not in this room because of the Kira case or anything of that nature. I'm not accusing you at this moment of being Kira or being associated with Kira. The moment we walked threw the door the case became second to what I wanted."

"Wh-what do you want then? What-I mean how can having us locked into a bare room for hours and having you ask me that damn question again and again have nothing to do with Kira?! You are obsessed with me being Kira! This is-I just don't get it!"

Raito was baffled, no scrape that he was down right mystified. How could over 7 hours of questioning have nothing to do with accusing him of being Kira? It couldn't be true, L must be lying…but why would he lie about something like this? It didn't make any sense and if there was one thing that Raito hated more then criminals and Misa it was being confused.

"In case you have forgotten Raito-kun I have only ever asked you one question, and that was I simply wanted to know where you heard that name you called out earlier…in case you have forgotten it already let me refresh your memory…the name you called out was…Lawliet. So Raito-kun I will ask you again where have you heard that name? All I want is the truth…just something that isn't a constant lie. I want to know that I could trust you with this, I did not lie when I said that you were my friend Raito-kun so please…please don't lie to me right now."

Raito froze.

He seemed to be doing that a lot lately, he wouldn't have to if L would stop throwing him for a loop.

'I-I don't get him! Why…why would he-what makes him think he could trust me enough to speak the truth?! I'll I ever done is lie to him…I don't even know if I could tell the truth…I'm so out of practice I guess...ah Lawliet-kun you really are throwing yourself out here aren't you? Maybe…maybe I can give you something…not the whole truth of course…I'm still not ready for that…but maybe I can show you that I have changed…that I can give as much as you. I promised myself that I would make you trust me…this will be the first step.'

Raito closed his eyes and forcefully relaxed himself. He would need to be calm when…when he said something that wasn't an outright lie. The last time he could remember not telling an outright lie to anyone was…well truthfully he couldn't remember, and that's what scared him enough to try right now, even more so then L actually saying please to him.

Raito said one word, just word right now to confirm for L that he was going to try. Try to speak the truth for once in who knows how long.

Raito opened his eyes and with a determined light shining threw the darkness that had always slightly clouded them; he opened his mouth and spoke.

"Lawliet-kun"

--

The name seemed to echo faintly off the white enclosed walls that surrounded them.

L just stared at Raito. As if he really couldn't believe his eyes or ears.

Raito felt the tension in the room intensified and had the sudden thought that maybe he had made a mistake.

But not a second later as this thought crossed his mind he saw something that convinced him that what he did was the right thing.

L was smiling. And not his usual small, barely there smiles. No this was different.

L's smile covered his face. It was a wide truly happy smile.

He also couldn't help but notice that when L smiled widely his eyes closed and made an absolutely adorable half moon like shape. It just really added to his whole cute panda like image.

Raito had never felt better then did at the moment, not even when he had been Kira and had killed L and believed that he no longer had anyone to stand in his way to becoming a god…ok maybe not the best example but still. He had put that smile on L's face, and he had the special privilege of seeing it. He was sure that this was a smile that very, _very_ few people actually saw.

L started to actually straighten his back out. Raito could hear the pops that his spin made in protest. When he was totally straighten out and was standing tall Raito was actually shocked to see how tall L really was when he wasn't hunching over, he looked to be the same height as Raito himself, maybe even a bit taller.

L then started to walk towards Raito with an emotion in his usually emotionless eyes. One that Raito could not identify.

Raito uncertainty of what L was going to try, tried to shuffle back, but he had forgotten that he already had his back to the wall and only managed to collide into it. Making a noise that was slightly louder then he would have liked.

L stopped in the middle of the room, going no further towards Raito, who couldn't help but feel relief.

Raito was still kind of wary of how L was going to react to Raito actually saying something that wasn't a lie. It had only been one word, not much from anyone else's point of view. But to both Raito and L it had said a whole lot more. In that one word he had acknowledged that he had indeed spoken out loud before he passed out from pain earlier, but the most important message behind the name was when he added the kun to the name. He had acknowledged that he knew that the name he had spoken out had not been some random name; by adding the kun to the end of the name he clearly was telling L that he knew that _Lawliet was L's true name. _

L was still standing in the middle of the room with that strange emotion on his face. Raito still didn't know what it was but it sent cold and hot flashes running threw his body. L was no longer smiling but the image of it was still burned into Raito's memory.

Before he could examine that strange expression that L wore it quickly faded away before being replaced with a self-satisfied arrogant smug look.

'Oh…it seems that L wants a to start a fight, the time for the main event is now…I guess that L was getting uncomfortable with all the…understandings that seem to be floating between us right now. Let's get to a more comfortable ground of bickering and fighting each other shall we L?'

Raito watched with barely hidden distrust as L finally spoke.

"Well wow Yagami-kun I have to say that I'm impressed. Who would have thought that you'd be such a sucker for a quick batter of lashes and the word please? This must be the method that Amane-san uses to keep a leash on you. It is already clear for anyone with half a brain that you are not attracted to her in any way…I always wondered about that you know, why a smart attractive young man such as yourself could not be interested in such a beautiful young women who practically throws herself at your feet. You are a teenager and it is a scientific fact that young men your age are more hormonal driven then most. Hmmm. Do you want to know what I figure Yagami-kun? Well I'll tell you want I think…and when you think of it it's not that much of a stretch…you are not attracted to women in general Yagami-kun. Either that or Yagami-kun has a certain problem downstairs about it getting upstairs if you get my meaning."

Raito was speechless.

'How-how dare he?! That skinny little-god he doesn't want a fight, he wants a massacre. Well damn it he has it. He has no right to say I'm gay! I mean I know I may not have liked women in a sexual way, I actually find the idea fairly disgusting…but I have also never looked at a guy either! The only one I have ever thought of in that kind of way is standing right in front of me insulting my…well my dick! That's just going way to far L. You may call me Kira and accuse me of mass murder, heck you can even insult my intelligence and appearance, but if there's one think you should never insult it's a man's ability to get it up! This is war L!!'

"Also Yagami-kun you never really did answer my question. I wanted to know _where _you heard the name…so will we have to stay in here another 7 or so hours till your stubborn pride finally burns out again? We can always pass the time by you telling me your evil murderous deeds as Kira."

That did it.

With a wordless cry of rage Raito threw himself frenziedly at L.

Right before they both threw the first punch which promised to be the first of many more to come, Raito could have sworn he saw L smile in an almost satisfied contented manner.

--

Raito lost track of time as he and L fought like there was no tomorrow. Hours seem to pass while the two of them were engaged in trying to kick the others ass.

They finally broke up at the same time and moved a few feet from each other. It seemed like they both agreed silently to take a short breather to get their second wind and take care of any wounds they could.

Raito tried not to lean too much on the wall that was currently supporting him. They had not been holding back this time. Raito was glad that in the future he had learned a bit of martial arts, if not for that L would have wiped the floor with him hours ago. He had to admit though that L was very graceful and sexy when he fought with his martial art of capoiera. Even though his kicks hurt like a bitch.

Raito started to take stock of himself after he caught his breath. His shirt had been ripped almost to shreds and was just barley hanging onto his frame. Without much thought to it he just tore the rest of it off him, leaving his chest area bare.

Raito missed entirely the sudden heated look that L shot him.

Burses and small cuts marked his body. His whole body ached, he moved his tongue around his mouth, wincing at the cut on the side of his mouth that his teeth had sliced open after a certain fierce kick that L had dealt him, even though the hygienic part of him craned at it he spat out a mouthful of blood onto the white floor, which he noticed wasn't so white anymore with all the stains of blood and sweat that covered it.

Raito felt the back of his head where a truly impressive lump was growing after a nasty fall just moments before. He was kind of pissed off that he had been the first to fall.

Raito looked over at L who was back to kneeling in his usual crouch. L's previous white shirt was now stained with red and there was a trail of blood running down the side of his face where Raito's punch had broken the skin. Burses and other lacerations covered his body and face, also it seemed that L's pants had finally taken to much stress just like Raito's shirt had done. The bagginess of his pants had been their downfall. When Raito had started to fall only a moment ago he had tried to grasp a hold of something to help stop his decent. His hand had caught onto the top of L's pants, incidentally ripping them down one leg while he had gone down. Right now L was in the middle of trying to tie his pants back together by holding the two ripped sides together with both hands and using one of his ripped sleeves in a rope like manner. It worked enough that it kept his pants from falling completely off his skinny ass. But it had the down side of looking completely and utterly stupid.

Raito couldn't help but snort at the ridicules picture that L made at the moment.

A second later he wished that he hadn't.

'Ow, Ow, Oww, jeez that really hurts…we really did a number to each other this time. Its going to take more then just a few days to heal up these wounds…god what is dad going to say when he see us? Shit I didn't even think about that…ah well I'll just let L do the talking this time, since he's the one who started all this in the first place.'

Raito took a quick look at his watch which had somehow had miraculously not gotten a scratch on it. He did a double take when he saw how much time had actually passed while they had been fighting.

"What the…how the hell did three hours actually pass!? Wh-no wonder we look like shit."

L had looked over when he heard the shocked acclaimed, he got a thoughtful look on his face and lifted his thumb to gaw on it, only to flinch when it touched his spilt lip, he then looked at his thumb with a utter look of disgust. He then turned that look onto Raito, who got the feeling that they had moved from a physical fight back into the mental spar they had been engaged in before.

He wasn't wrong.

"Speak for yourself Kira-kun, I happen to not have such negative thoughts on my appearance, but it seems that you might want to see a therapist if you hold yourself in such low self-esteem."

Raito gapped at him, he then narrowed his eyes. He wouldn't let L win this fight. No way in all of Mu.

"I'm so glad that you hold yourself so **high** in self-esteem...how's the weather way up there anyway? Where the clouds a kind of greenish gray color? It isn't always good for people in your…situation not to let reality get to you. Just make sure you don't kill too many of your brain cells when you're getting yourself so **high** in self-esteem. Also…what happened to nothing in this room is about you accusing me of being Kira? I thought we were going to leave him out of this."

L's eyes narrowed dangerously, before he spoke in a soft growl that did a lot of things to Raito, things that he did _not_ want to happen when L was right in front of him. But it also had the negative effect of bring back that fear that had first taken a hold of Raito when he had first came into the room hours ago. Raito knew that if he continued with baiting L right now he just might just become severely injured before leaving this room, but just like a true addict, he couldn't help himself. He wanted to see L lose it…even at the cost of his own health.

"Are you calling me a drug addict Raito?"

'Oh shit, he said my name without the kun… I need to get control of my body like now! Damn that's hot though…but he is severely pissed off right now. God this is going to be so much fun…not, God I'm a frickening pain whore that's what I am.'

Raito adopted a thoughtful thinking expression, as to show that he was actually thinking of what he said. L looked to be getting more pissed off by the second.

"Why L…I believe I did. I mean just by looking at you anyone would get the impression of you being a heavy user. Heh, I wouldn't really be surprised myself…maybe that's what you're really putting into your tea and coffee, I doubt it is actually sugar. Don't worry though, I'm sure the investigation team and myself will get along ok on the case without you while you're at rehab. Hey maybe they even let you have cake every once in a while…that is if they never figure out that cake is probably where you're stash is hidden. Don't worry though I promise to visit and send flowers. You don't have to worry though; you can relax knowing that the Kira case is in good hands-"

Before Raito could continue to degrade L he was cut short by the speeding form of the person he had just been insulting.

Raito was too shocked to do much as L punched his viscously across his face. Sending him rearing a few feet to his left, he managed to barely stop himself from falling again. It seemed that L did not like being called a druggy at all or having the threat of having his case taken from him.

L didn't stop there though. While Raito was still reeling from having his brains scrambled from L's powerful punch L quickly struck out with a high kick catching Raito in the chin causing him to bit down hard onto his tongue. As blood flowed down Raito's mouth and chin, L then gave another devastating kick, this time into Raito's stomach, causing Raito to double over in pain, one hand holding his stomach and the other covering his mouth, not because of the blood running out of it but because he was trying not to hurl from the powerful kick that made him want to throw up, not that he had anything in his stomach to throw up with but still dry heaving and acid where not on his list of things that he wanted to do or taste.

Sadly Raito wasn't given any chance to recover, or attack back, or even given the time to defend himself.

It seemed that L really, really didn't like to be called a druggy or to be associated with drugs of any kind.

L continued to just beat on Raito, this was no longer any type of even fair fight, and after a few failed attempts of defense Raito decided to give up and just tried to cover any of his vital places like his head and chest from taking the brunt of L's anger.

After an unknown amount of time pass it seemed that L's anger was finally burning out. His punches and kicks started to lose strength as time pasted until they just stopped altogether.

Raito's arms were covered over his head and face and he was on the ground curled into a defensive position. It was degrading for him to be seen like this but it was better then leaving himself venerable to more serious injures.

Silence filled the air, the only exception being for Raito's harsh painful panting.

After a few minutes of nothing happening Raito finally took the courage to peak out between this fingers, not moving out of his fetal position though.

He was so startled by what he saw that he had to move his hands from his face completely just to make sure that he wasn't seeing things.

L…Ryuzaki…was crying.

Not a lot mind you, but a few tracts of what were clearly tears seemed to spill down his face; they made up clear clean trails threw the blood that covered most of his face from his earlier head wound.

But that was not what startled Raito so much, what had startled him was the expression that Ryuzaki wore, and the distant inner gaze of his eyes which showed that he wasn't really seeing anything in front of him.

Total devastation, disbelief and self-loathing; those were the emotions warring on Ryuzaki's face at the moment.

It seemed that Ryuzaki had just figured out that he had been beating on a defenseless Raito.

'He probably thinks he killed me or something like that. While I defiantly hurt and I most likely have a lot of new and colorful bruises nothing seems to be seriously damaged, also nothing seems to be broken, except maybe my pride but that seems to have so many holes in it nowadays that it hardly effects me anymore…well not that much at least. Wow L must have had a lot of built up stress and frustration to just go all out on me like that…but I'm not as badly off as I thought I would be, at least with the way I pissed him off. But with the way he's looking right now…I think it's him that I should be worried about. He looks like he's one step short from committing suicide. Heh I didn't know you cared that much about me L, later when I have the chance and time maybe I can use that to help me figure out a way for him to trust me. But right now I better make some sort of noise or something to show I'm alive…no matter how much it hurts to even think about moving anymore then I have already.'

Raito let out a choked cough that quickly seemed to evolve into full body wracks.

L seemed to finally snap out of whatever kind of self-angst flunk he had fallen into after coming to his senses.

"Raito-kun!"

L quickly moved over towards Raito and reached out to try to help him. What he expected to be able to do to help Raito didn't know.

Raito tried to stop himself, he knew that it would hurt L more then anything else, but he couldn't seem to help himself. When he saw L reaching out, even though he logically that L must be trying to help, he couldn't help but flinch back away from the out reached hand, which froze instantly, not moving forward anymore but not withdrawing either.

Raito looked at L in the face and felt guilt. L had such a sad distressed look on his face that Raito wished frantically that he could take back his body's natural reflex to seeing L's hand move towards him.

Raito tried to say something, anything at all in the hope to get that look off of L's face but every time he opened his mouth all that came out was hot air. No sound at all, it seemed that his earlier coughing had exhausted his vocal cords.

L seemed to realize what Raito was trying to do though because the distressed look slowly faded away and a hesitant apologetic look over took it. Raito quickly gave a semi-smile as if to say apology accepted.

L seemed to understand because he came forward again to help Raito. L's arms then came forward to wrap around Raito's shoulders to help him sit up.

This time Raito didn't flinch.

--

After making sure that Raito wasn't seriously injured, he just had a lot of more bruises all over, mostly on his chest area and a few strained muscles in his arms, which he had gotten when he had strained them trying to cover as much of himself as possible from L's kicks and punches, his tongue was also swollen from when he had bitten his tongue earlier, when L had kicked him in the jaw.

They both just sat down against the wall side by side not moving much or even talking. They both need this peace at the moment. Especially after all that happened, though after about another hour or so of just sitting there Raito finally got fairly tired of the silence.

'Well one things for sure, events have defiantly changed a lot from the original time-line…and I haven't really done anything yet. All I did was scream in pain and pass out…oh yea, and call out L's real name. Which I still can't believe that I would do something so stupid…well I guess it kind of brought me closer to L, if you call beating each other to a bloody pulp is getting closer to each other. Still I can't just let him get away with kicking my ass…even though I forgave him for losing his temper, something that I never saw him do now that I think about it. Before we had been chained together for almost 5 months…but I don't remember him getting anything other then mildly annoyed or depressed, he's showing more of himself to me right now in only a few short hours then he did when we were chained 24/7 for months, I guess I should be really happy and I guess I kind of am…maybe I feel more happy later when I'm not in such pain. Now then…how to get back at him? I don't think I'm going to talk about him looking like a druggy anymore, he freaking scared me enough…not to mention that when he talks in that deep dark voice…Darn it! I need to focus, so…what should I do? I don't want to do anything to bad…L need to let out some aggression; I just wish he hadn't had to take it out on me.'

But Raito needn't have bothered trying to figure something out. The answer presented itself, with L knowingly or unknowingly giving Raito the solution to getting some revenge. But not one that he would take, at least not without feeling like a real right bastard.

L was the first to break the silence, something which Raito was deeply grateful for; he couldn't help but still feel as though they were still in some sort of competition.

"I would like to apologize Raito-kun, I know that you already have forgiven me which is more then I truly deserve, but I have to say it out loud. I am truly sorry Raito-kun…never in all my life have I ever lost control like that…I'm deeply ashamed of my actions, and I don't really know how I could make it up to you but I will try."

Raito looked sideways at Ryuzaki who really did look apologetic and ashamed of what he had done. Raito decided to let him off the hook for now. Later though…that was another matter entirely.

"Why don't you just tell me what set you off? I mean…what was it that I said to you that caused you to lose it like that?"

Ryuzaki started to look more then slightly uncomfortable but a determined light started to shine in those usually dull eyes. After a moment he nodded his head in consent.

"Very well I will tell you Raito-kun, what you are about to hear is…well it's one of my more unpleasant past memories."

With that said he got out of his crouched position and moved into a more comfortable sitting arrangement. He sat on his behind and let his legs stretch out in front of him while resting his entire back and head on the wall behind him.

Seeing the disbelief that crossed Raito's face at seeing L in any other sitting arrangement then his usual crouched position. His lips quirking a bit he explained.

"What I'm about to tell you doesn't require high brain power, I can afford to lose that 40 percent of extra brain power…what I'm about to tell you involves more of my memories and feelings I guess…I might as well be comfortable as I tell you something about myself…though keep in mind that you will not be able to get to my identity from what I tell you…though I guess I really shouldn't bother anymore with you knowing…that name."

Raito kind of sheepishly ducked his head and also decided to get into a more comfortable spot on the ground. He really wish that L had put _some_ type of furniture in this room, but he guessed that L had figured they would fight so he probably didn't want there to be anything in here that they could have used on each other.

After they both got in more comfortable positions which included resting their shoulders together, this had Raito blushing very lightly as their shoulders just barely brushed each other.

L then started to talk, speaking only in a slightly less monotone voice then he usually talked in.

"Well I guess I should start at the beginning, at least enough so that you will get what I'm talking about, so here it goes I guess...when I was younger I often suffered from night terrors. It got so bad that I was lucky if I got an hour of sleep a night. After a while I saw the upside of this though…I got more time to work on cases and without the added stress of lost time. I started to train my body to accept its new role. It wasn't difficult because I was used to almost no sleep by then because of my nightmares. But it did have an effect on my appearance. As the years went by where if I was lucky enough I got an hour of sleep a night, my skin became more of a sickly pallor and the shadows under my eyes became darker and more pronounce, I guess it didn't help that I never went out much either. I admit that I did not look like a typical normal healthy human being at all. I rarely went outside when I was younger so I didn't really think of how my appearance would look like to anyone else. Watari knew the reasons for it of course and he had gotten use to it…but other people…when I was around 13 years old I was working on a very tedious case, it wasn't really difficult and I solved it within a few days but the paperwork and red tape I had to go threw was very boring. I had decided to take a break after about 3 hours of non-stop paperwork, I wanted to eat some strawberry cake so I went to the small fridge that we had in the hotel room that we were living in at that moment, I found out that I had already finished the cake the day before and I found nothing in there that I wanted so I started to call out to Watari in the hopes that he would go out to buy me another one."

"It was only after I did that did I remember I had sent him on an errand only a half hour ago. I knew I should have just waited for him to come back…but that would have probably taken another hour and I really wanted cake…so I did something I had never did before…I left by myself…I know that might not seem like much to you Raito-kun but I had never really done anything without Watari there, and I never really wanted to go out before so I had never done so. Watari had always gone and gotten anything I had ever need or wanted so I kind of took that for granted I guess…I didn't really think about what I was doing at the time. I knew that there was a cake shop about 3 blocks away from the hotel so I thought I would just take some of the cash that Watari always left behind and just walk over and buy some…I didn't really think of how I looked or presented myself, I had been working on a case for over 3 days straight so my eyes had gone blood-shot and my skin had turned a shallow ashen color, my cloths had a particular smell to them and I wore no shoes. Looking back on what happen now, I can't really blame them for what they did…well almost can't blame them…anyway I had left the room that Watari had left me in and started to walk outside. It was winter at the time and snowing. I had forgotten to grab any type of jacket when I had left so you could imagine how cold I was, also remember I had no shoes and my feet where only use to walking on soft comfortable carpet. I had wanted to turn right back and run to my room but my stubborn pride would not let me, also I really wanted that cake."

L had finally paused to take a breather; while he was slowly getting his breath back Raito was looking at him in astonishment, L had never _never _talked about himself before when they had been chained together…to think that now L was actually sharing something about himself to Raito…well it was a wonderful and mildly frightening experience.

'If this is how L reacts after he beats someone up I just might have to let him kick my ass more often…though it would be nice if we could skip that part from now on and just get to the sharing, is it sharing when only one person is talking though? Well it really doesn't matter in this situation, I'm sure that L has all my personal information somewhere on file. Heh that would just be like him…though it would be creepy if he had _everything _on file, not that it would surprise me. Wow, L was certainly a sheltered child that's for sure…I'm not sure I'm liking where this is headed though, I hope that I'm wrong but I rarely am…poor L.'

After L got his next wind he started to talk again, Raito listening in morbid silence.

"I began to quickly walk threw the crowds towards the direction that I knew the cake shop was in, I remember noticing the disproving and disgusted looks that were casted my way. At the time I barely gave them any thought because I was so cold and hungry by that point. I finally found the shop after about another eighteen minutes of wandering around. By that time my skin had taken an ugly blueish tint that mixed horribly with my already ashen appearance and my toes had turned faintly purple with the beginning of frost bite. I went into the shop and had just stood there for a minute or two absorbing the heat that the shop was emitting. I had ignored the looks that were sent my way the moment I had entered the shop and finally started to move to the counter. I admit I was slightly oblivious of what everyone was thinking about when they looked at me. When I got to the counter I had ignored yet again the way everyone got out of my way to avoid me. I was truly stupid for not leaving eminently but I was young and bull-headed, I had stood in front of the counter and had tried to order, I didn't know why then that the man behind the counter was completely ignoring me."

"After failing to get his attention for a minute or two I decided that I would sit on the counter till I made the employee notice me. I was not use to being ignored and I had not liked it at all. I admit that I may have been a little arrogant and snobbish but I was hailed as the greatest detective in the world and I was not use to being over looked. Never mind that no one knew who I was and what I looked like, I might have let the notoriety of my job swell my head a little but you have to remember I may have had a very high I.Q. but I was still a child at the time. After that I defiantly got some attention and not the kind I wanted either. After I had hopped onto the counter the guy who was manning the counter finally told me in barely hidden disgust for me to leave because they did not serve _my kind_ here. I was confused by what he said and more then a little angry that he refused to let me order the cake I had so wanted. I had asked him rather rudely what he meant by my kind, and he told me that he wasn't stupid nor blind and that if I didn't want to be arrested by the police that I had better leave. I was honestly outraged at this and still more then a bit confused so I just continued to sit there in the hope that the guy would change his mind. I hadn't really believed that he would call the police on me especially since I hadn't done anything but try to be a customer."

Raito just stared at him as L paused yet again from his long winded speech.

"He didn't did he....and by what he meant by your kind…oh god Ryuzaki I'm so sorry."

L waved away his apology.

"You didn't know any better Raito-kun so there really isn't any reason to apologize for, as to what he did and meant…well let's just say that after that I never took threats lightly anymore. Not ten minutes later two uniform police men came threw the door and rather roughly yanked me from the counter and precede to drag me out of the shop, I as you could imagine was very mad and confused and I admit more then a bit frightened. I tried to tell the officers that I was just in there to buy some cake and that was all. They had snorted to themselves and said that there was no way that I would be able to afford anything and that I would have to stay in the local jail until someone picked me up or I rot in there. Frightened beyond belief by now I demanded to know why I was being taken into custody. They had laughed and told me that I had disturbed the peace and that I was on drugs so they had to make sure to take trash like me off the streets for the safety of law abiding citizens. You could well imagine my shock when I heard that they though I was on drugs. I tried to tell them the truth, that I wasn't on any type of drug, and that I wasn't living on the street either. I even gave them the name of the hotel I was staying at but it was a very upscale place and they just laughed at my attempts to tell them the truth. After they threw me into their car after a short scuffle with me trying to escape we started to drive off. I yet again tried to reason with them but they completely ignored me. After a few minutes of that I just sat back and tried to come up with a plan, I reasoned with myself that I would be able to make a phone call the moment I got to the station and I would call Watari and then everything would be ok…if only that were so."

"When we got to the station they eminently dragged me off to the interrogation room, I was completely ignored as I tried to ask to use the phone. They left me in the room for hours before someone finally remembered me. By that time I was desperate, I was tired and hungry and I really need to use the can, it seemed that they had left me in there for that reason. They came in and started to accuse me of all sorts of things, after trying to tell them yet again that I just wanted the strawberry cake they eminently interpreted this as a confession that strawberry cake was some code word for drugs and my contact must be at the cake shop, after yet again trying to say that I wasn't on any type of drug I even showed them the money that I had, which I admit I did have a bit too much on me at the time, I think it was around 400 dollars…anyway they eminently assumed that I had stolen it and said that they were going to add larceny to my list of crimes. They told me that I would be going to the state prison and then proceed to tell me what they do to small boys there…I admit that I was downright terrified by this point and to my eternal shame I had broken down crying at this point. Disgusted by my display they hauled me yet again to another room…this time to a small prison cell that they put inmates in till they could be shipped out. I tried yet again to ask if I could use the phone, to just call one person…all they did was laugh and say that I had no one to call and no one would miss a piece of gutter trash like me…I was still so young and was frighten beyond rational thought, so I even started to believe them a bit by this time…after leaving me in the cell which I thank the gods even now, that I was the only one down there…I don't want to think of what would have happened if I was put in a cell with a real criminal…I was stuck there for 3 days before Watari finally found me…by then I had retreated into my mind almost completely, leaving my body to slowly waste away…it took almost 2 years of Watari counseling me before I could be left by myself in any type of dark room. I'm a lot better now and it is only a really bad memory to me but still, I get really mad if anyone ever accuses me of being a druggy nowadays."

When L had finally stopped speaking only silence answered. He turned to look to the ground and didn't lift his head.

Raito was in shock, which quickly enough turned into righteous fury.

'My god…those bastards…shit there goes my new pacification look on life, I'm going to find the names of those…monsters…and…ok I can't use the deathnote anymore but that wouldn't be satisfactory anyway…no I'll kill those assholes with my bare hands.'

Raito really didn't know what to say. He could now understand a bit about L and could sympathize with him…at least up to a point. Still what do you say in a situation like this? He knew that if he had still been Kira he would probably used this information to destroy L, but he wasn't and he didn't want to destroy L any longer…he already did that once and it hadn't been all that great.

"L…I know that nothing I could say would make what happen to you any easier to deal with…but…let's just consider apology accepted and never speak about this again."

L looked up and sent Raito a look of gratitude, he then nodded his head. L's face then started to grow thoughtful, as if a sudden thought crossed his mind.

Raito started to feel wary, because whenever L got that look on his face it usually was because he was figuring out a new way of either accusing him of being Kira or he was looking at a case…and since they didn't have any type of case file in front of them he was pretty sure it was the former then the latter.

'Ah darn it; isn't he tired of fighting yet?'

It didn't seem so at least to Raito as he saw L's face grow into a full blown smirk.

"So Raito-kun…what will you do with such information now I wonder…hmm…will you use it against me? I know that Raito-kun would never do such a thing, he's such a model student with such high and might set of morals and whatnot…but I can't say I'm exactly talking to Raito-kun can I? Isn't that right…Kira?"

Raito's face had adopted a look of complete fury. His face started turning many shades of red and finally just settled on an off-white color of pure rage. His eyes narrowed dangerously. He knew that L was purposely giving him an out for his revenge, because even though Raito may have forgiven him, they both knew that revenge was needed. It was only fair after all, to make things truly even between them L need to get his ass kicked just like Raito's had been. But that thought was very small and was quickly washed away with the rage that was currently flowing threw him at the moment.

With everything that happened to him…Being killed…sent to Mu…regaining his memories…dealing with the Shinigami King and learning that he was-_is_ responsible for the end of the world…learning that he was no longer completely human anymore…been given a chance of redemption…being sent back into time, which had _hurt_…then having to kill his alter ego Kira and learning about Zaki…then having to wake up with the threat of L using a crash cart on him to wake him up…dealing with seeing his father alive…dealing with L and his obsession of handcuffs…then **Misa**…then getting locked in that god-damned room…getting the shit kicked out of him…and dare he say it? _Bonding_ with his ex-enemy…and now after being really hurt, hungry and tired and just plain having a really shitty day L starts to accurse him again?! It was almost enough to make a weaker person snap. To bad for L…Raito wasn't feeling that strong at the moment.

Raito could literally feel a chain in his mind grow taunt…and then a quick snap sounded threw his mind. He literally saw red.

He saw it happen in slow motion, it was like everything had slowed down till it was like moving in water. He saw and felt his arm rise from its resting spot next to him, then it made a tight fist and then it lifted and it was like time started back up.

His fist came flying out and struck L right in the temple.

The impact made an almost cracking sound but not quite, but when L started to fall on his side and his head struck the ground it really **did** make a loud cracking sound.

Raito froze when he heard the sound; he then suddenly came back to his senses.

'Shit, shit, shit…god L how stupid are you?! How could you even think of working me up after all this? Shit if your dead I'm going to find some way to bring you back from the land of the dead and kick you ass…heck I did it after all. Damn that sounded really bad though…god you better be ok, you stupid panda…'

Raito quickly knelt down next to the still body of L and started to look for a pulse. He gave a sigh of relief when he found one after taking L's hand and feeling his wrist. He then quickly looked at L's face to see if he was unconscious or something like that…it wouldn't be good if he had a concussion and was knocked out.

Raito paused as he heard a weird sound he had never heard before. It seemed to be coming from L so he took a closer look. An expression of disbelief and astonishment overcame his face.

Looking at L's slacken and strangely peaceful expression he found the sound coming from L's mouth…he was softly snoring.

'He's asleep…the bastard actually feel asleep after having me punch him…I don't know wither to be insulted or amused, gods L only you.'

Raito noticed that L had fallen in a kind of awkward position. With his body half twisted up. It looked highly uncomfortable. Looking at him gave Raito an idea. A frightful wonderful very stupid idea, ignoring L's peaceful face Raito started to think.

'He does look uncomfortable…yes I'm almost positive that L wouldn't mind…and I doubt he will be waking up anytime soon…one of the things I remember from my past life was that when L did ever managed to fall asleep he slept like the dead…so just maybe…'

With that half-convincing thought Raito quickly decided that the consequences were worth it.

Raito reached out and carefully maneuvered L until he was laying with his head in Raito's lap.

Raito could feel an involuntary blush work its way up his face, but he didn't try to stop it with no one else to witness it but a sleeping L.

Raito looked down into Ryuzaki's peaceful slack face and thought the soft snores coming from him were actually really cute. He made a face as this thought crossed his mind but didn't deny it. Raito wondered why he had never heard them before. He had seen L sleep once or twice before unless…L hadn't really been asleep at all at those times. That was slightly worrying because that would mean that L probably hadn't slept at all when they had been chained together.

'L you stupid man…if I hadn't killed you then your stupid habits would have sooner rather then later. What am I going to do with you?'

Raito let out an inaudible sigh of annoyance and fondness. L was just too much sometimes.

--

An hour or so pasted and L continued to sleep, Raito had taken to running his hand threw L's hair, it seemed to smooth any impending nightmares that L might have because he seemed to only squirm and whimper if he stopped. Raito was fascinated, he had never seen so much emotion in L, it was an interesting and unusual experience. Still he hadn't stopped petting L's hair since that one time that told him that if he didn't want a distressed L on his hands he better keep at it. He didn't really mind though, L's hair was surprisingly soft for all its wildness; it also smelled faintly of strawberries.

'Heh that really shouldn't surprise me, I wouldn't be surprised if I found out he bathed in strawberries…wait I think I remember something about a certain brand of shampoo that he had used, at least he did use only when I finally forced him to use the shower after going days without one, yuck that was just wrong L…but I think that that shampoo had been strawberry scented…only you L.'

Raito looked down when he felt a slight shifting, L's head had turned slightly so his face was facing upwards and his nose was all scrunched up. It took two seconds to figure out what was about to happen.

Raito barely managed to move his own head out of the way before L sneezed.

And it wasn't a normal loud gross sneeze either; it was one of those cute sniffles sneezes.

'Oh my god…I wish I had a camcorder or something like that, that was just too cute…god the blackmail that that sneeze could have given me. I need to remind myself to get a hold of something like that soon and then find a feather or something and use it…hehe.'

Raito looked back down at L whose face had started to relax again; he then had the urge to do something that was most likely the weirdest stupidest downright suicidal urge of all time.

'I shouldn't…I mean I really don't know exactly what it is that I feel for him yet, not to mention Ryuzaki would kill me if he found out…that is if he found out…it's really not that much of a big deal, it would be quick and everything…I'm just curious that's all. It should be ok if I'm quick and he never finds out. Which I doubt since he's asleep and all, and most likely to stay that way for a while yet…yea why not.'

After again trying to justify his next course of action, he quickly made his move.

He didn't notice that his hand had stopped moving threw L's hair earlier, if he had noticed he would have seen L start to scrunch up his face in such an obvious way as when people are about to wake up. But Raito didn't see this.

Raito was to busy freaking out over what he was about to do. Finally giving up thinking about it Raito just decided to do it and get it over with.

With new determination he quickly closed his eyes then bent in half over L's laying form and…softly kissed him.

It really couldn't be categorized as a kiss; he had angled it at the last second to barley brush the side of L's mouth, his lips barley touching L at all.

Raito opened his eyes, his lips still hovering warmly on the side of L's mouth. It took a few seconds to actually comprehend what he saw. When it finally processed in his brain what he was seeing his eyes widen in surprise.

L was staring right back at him with his own black eyes widen almost comically in shock.

'Oh…well shit.'

Before Raito could even move away much less think of an excuse for his actions L acted first.

Raito could tell it was more reflex then corporate thought which drove L to do what he did.

He lifted his hand and slapped Raito hard across the face.

Raito felt his head bounce off of the wall behind him. Right before he blacked out he saw L still looking at him in shock…but was that regret he saw too?

Raito didn't have time to comprehend what he saw before he blacked out from the concussion that L had just dealt him.

--

**Edited- 11/13/08**

OK I'M GOING TO END IT HERE FOR NOW! One, because this is just getting to freaking long. Two I think it makes a good cliff-hanger. Three…well there really is no three. Sorry.

Ok…a lot has happen in this chapter don't you think? Poor child-Lawliet…people can really cruel in life…I really did mix some stuff up huh. I mean the fluff came first then the violence then the pissed off L then more fluff then some more violence…geez.

Oh for all of you out there who want to see more of Raito's shinigami form you'll be really happy in the next chapter (heh I just did a spoiler ;)

Soooo…what do you think? They are bonding! Kind of. Awww poor Raito he just got rejected :-0…maybe L will apologize again and they can make up…or make out . I **might **just have them in denial of there attraction for each other for a few more chapters…it's more fun that way.

Also you want to know what the very first thing that came to my mind when I was writing the description for the empty white room was?...a room with a huge bed…- heheh I even wrote a small scene with it, but I had deleted it so I could write the real chapter…my god Raito's expression was priceless! Ox0 (OMG look)

This really is an extra long chapter, over 27 pages long…wow…I just had so much to write down and I can never find a good enough place to stop ;-9 oh well more for you all I guess.

Tell me what you think!! I thank all of you who have reviewed this story but I need more (I'm a selfish writer but hey who isn't?) _**please review. **_


	8. Chapter 8

Warnings: Shinigami Raito, worried L, language, humor, ummm…what else? Shocked Watari?

This is more of a filler type chapter (but does contain important plot twists!) the next chapter should be longer.

This is dedicated to all who reviewed my last chapter, **thank you**:

Pink Feline, - Yea! I'm glad you're an addict for my story! Hehe fanfiction can be such a terrible addiction though…I should be doing something else right now…homework…housework…seeing the sun in over 4 days…a whole bunch of stuff but I'd rather just update my story for you all, especially if waiting for me to update is murdering you! ;P

Black-Dranzer-1119, - Chapter 7 is also my most favorite chapter yet too. I had such fun writing it too. Hmmm L won't be in denial too much longer…maybe a few more chapters…I _know_ poor Raito! It just isn't his day huh? Heheh I'm also wondering how he will have to explain how he knows L's real name…0.o L hasn't forgotten but I think a passed out Raito is taking priority over finding out. Heheh L is letting his emotions overcome his judgment…oooohhh :-)

Chibi Tsuki Hikari, - I did cry at the length of my last chapter! At least my fingers are getting a good workout XP I know poor child L! We must glomp him with our fan-girl love! (GLOMPS L!!)kyaaa…ok…moving on 0.o also poor Raito too T-T I just like hurting the poor pretty boys!...heheh though Raito might not protest too much now that he has a frantic worried L hovering over him…(insert fan-girl laugh) MUHAHAHAHA…(does anyone else notice that the evil writer laugh and the fan-girl laugh are one and the same?) o.0

Vanity, - I'm really glad that you loved my last chapter and that it was worth the wait :) Hope you also enjoy this coming up chapter too. L's reaction to Raito passing out will be good! Hehe hope you also will think so. ;-9

Pouf, - I really like it that your kind of reviewing about yourself :-) I'm glad I made you a happy person, it's the whole reason I started this story to make readers like you happy, huh Canada school system is weird…no offense or anything! I'm from the great big state of CA, sadly I'm stuck in the middle of nowhere here…nothing but pine trees and mountain lions…0.o yea anyway I was also laughing my ass off while I wrote the room scene…and to my eternal shame I really, _really_ enjoyed writing about L getting put in jail and being traumatized…it was just too much fun! Hope your piano teacher doesn't kill you…you are one of my favorite reviewers T-T I'll cry then sic Misa on him for you! Hehehe

Dark Oracle, - I know 27 pages is amazing and what's more is I expect my chapters might get even longer…oh good god- yea there was a reason for L beating the shit out of Raito while having a 'panic attack' you see…no one else really talked again how L still kind of looks… 'well, looks like he's still on drugs' and remember that when Raito was insulting him he was saying that basically they would send L away to rehab(which in L's panicked mind meant prison .) Watari had helped L get over it mostly but still…he was traumatized and he just blindly lased out at the person who was threatening him. So there…I think that might answer your question (I hope XP)

BishounenYaoiLover, - Yea I know…3 hours is a _very_ long time, especially since they were _really_ trying to kick each others ass! I really do feel sorry for L…I just really need a explanation for why he went all bezerker on Raito, Yes L is confused, when he slapped Raito at the end, Raito saw that it was more a reflex then any type of disgust. _L was not expecting to wake up with his only suspect for a mass murder case kissing him!_ hehe hope that answers your question :P

Yoshiluvr, - No you rock! :D heheh, anyway I'm really happy your hooked on my story and hope that you will continue to be so for a long time to come…this story will be LONG! (hopefully :-)

Kuroiryuu, - wow…just wow…You have made me so happy right now I can't put it into words…I'm so glad you gave my story a chance, and I feel so honored that I made your bookmark list. I really do ;) I have to admit that I hated my first few chapters…they were so small and I didn't really have an idea of where I was going with it. Now after many chapters and wondrous and inspirational reviews I can proudly say that my story is getting much better! (or I like to think so.) I have to admit that even I would call my writing style a bit 'choppy' kind of. You see this is really the first time I ever really tried to write anything, at least decently anyway, so I'm really a first timer, at least as a writer. As a reader I like to think of myself as an expert :-) I loved your long review and whoever that author is that said your reviews are a 'frigen essay' doesn't know what a real review is! It is NOT just a hello-good-bye-updated-soon thing, or at least a really good one isn't._(For all of my reviewers who do leave that kind of review I'm still very very grateful for them. I'm sorry if I offend anyone I don't mean to. T.T)_ It involves thoughts and feelings of the story the reader needs to express to the writer. It involves **good** criticism and such stuff like that. So I just want to say thank you very much Kuroiryuu for reviewing and reading my story. I will try to keep my story as entertaining and good as possible. Also I will be keeping it as unpredictable as possible too. XP

Shinigami's Voice, - Much sexual tension XD, I had actually had that on my warnings list but I had taken it down…maybe I shouldn't have? I loved making them fight though I got to say making them bond was fun to. I really enjoyed writing about L's childhood incident. Hehe it was fun to see little L suffer (aww poor L :) I might do a few more flash backs in this story; they will either be L's or Raito's. If I do, do more they will be randomly in this story, I haven't got anymore planned…but the ideas will come to me when they are needed :-)

Fantasies4eva, - yea, you really got to feel kind of sorry for both L and Raito in this chapter, and poor Raito…unlike the punch he had given L to knock him out, Raito gets _slapped_! Hehe I also noticed that everyone seems to be passing out a lot too.

Do you know it just came to my attention in my last long ass chapter? I never once had Raito try to explain how he knows L's really name…it just kind of got away from me…oh well with what all happen in that chapter they more preoccupied with kicking each others ass I guess. Most likely somewhere in the following chapters will L finally get his explanation…Most likely…yea…anyway onward!

--

It had gotten dark once again. Raito felt like his was floating, everything seemed kind of muffled…sound…touch…everything.

After an unknown amount of time in which Raito just kind of drifted in a pleasant haze he soon became aware of a nagging noise. At first it was still kind of stifled but as time went by it became more and more clear.

"ito-kun! Raito-kun! Wake up please! Raito-kun-"

It was frankly starting to bother him, but what seemed to bother him even more then being pulled away from the pleasant drifting that he had been engaged in was that he couldn't understand what the person was talking about. Sure he heard everything but who was this Raito-kun…Oh.

It all came back to him suddenly.

'Shit that's me! I must have passed out again and why the hell does that seem to be the only thing that I've been doing lately? And…ah that's sees to be Ryuzaki who's calling out to me, he seems kind of frantic though…I wonder why? The last thing I remember was being stuck in that room and punching L out…OH SHIT!! I didn't…fuck I did! I fucking kissed him!! Shit-mother fucker-god damnit-for all that is holy-argh! Is this what Ryuk meant when he said that the Deathnote only brought misfortune? Because seriously my life can not get more messed up right now then it already is…wait…I shouldn't say that just incase, you never know what the hells going to happen next in this freaking messed up life of mine…darn L's still screaming out…he really must be worried. I guess I better get up and console him before Watari comes in and thinks I'm killing him or something…'

At that moment Raito would have blushed if he had been able too. If Watari was listening on the other side of the door all he would be hearing was L calling out Raito's name…oh shit, forget that he wasn't just blushing, he now felt like he would spontaneously combust with mortification.

'Damn…did I always have such a dirty mind or is this only a recent development? Well whatever I need to wake up and shut L up before Watari comes in here with a shot gun aimed for my head.'

With that mental sigh Raito started to try to wake up…it proved to be a lot harder then he had thought it would be.

After struggling for what felt for hours Raito finally felt his body move some…the thing was that L hadn't stopped calling out…it was like he hadn't noticed at all.

'God L get over your hysterical fit and see that I'm awake! Or at least aware enough where I can hear you're freaking out! Hehe at least I have something to nag him with. I think…yea I can move now it seems. Let's see if I can speak…I'll keep my eyes closed for now…they seem to be really stinging for some reason…'

"H-hey L…you can stop acting like a hysterical Misa now, I'm awake."

Raito waited for L to get all prissy over the idea that he was acting like Misa but…it never came. L was still acting like he hadn't heard a word that Raito just said, even though Raito could hear himself loud and clear.

'Weird, L might be a lot of things but he isn't unobservant…what's going on?'

Raito decided to try to open his eyes and see what was happening. He was still oblivious that the floating feeling that he had felt earlier when he had been asleep was still there.

Raito slowly pried open his eye lids, which felt like a giant weight was holding them down. But Raito was determined and if you asked anyone who knew Raito they would tell you when Raito wanted something badly enough he got it in the end.

What he saw when he finally opened his eyes just left him in totally and complete shock. His jaw dropped and his eyes widen till they seemed to almost take over his face. The heaviness had vanished the instant he saw the scene before him.

He himself seemed to be floating a few feet in the air…and directly below him was a frantic L shaking and holding onto his passed out body.

'Well…that's not good.'

--

It took a few minutes to get over the shock of seeing that he no longer occupied his body. He quickly looked at himself and…yep he was in his shinigami form. His eyesight also seemed to be in a permanent haze of red.

'Yea…I remember now didn't the King say something about this? That I could leave my body once it became unconscious or something like that? Hmmm…I wonder…hey what's L doing now?'

L had finally stopped shaking and screaming out Raito's name in the hope to wake him up. He was instead pulling something out of his pocket…ah his cell phone.

L frantically started to punch in what seemed to be a long sequence of random numbers. After about a minute or two of him doing that he finally pushed the send button and started to visibly calm down.

Raito was once again fascinated by L's display of human emotions, and because L didn't realize that anyone could even see him at the moment he showed even more then ever.

L gave a sigh of exhaustion and then proceeded to help Raito's body into a more comfortable position. He looked like he was just going to lay him on the floor, but paused before another thoughtful expression over took his pervious panicked expression.

He then did something that shocked and pleased Raito like nothing else. He had moved Raito's body in the same position that Raito had put L in when he had been knocked out. Only this time it was Raito's head in L's lap.

'Oh darn it…I wish I was awake for that…aww look he's running his hand through my hair too. I wish I could feel that. Wow with all the fluffy feelings that I'm feeling right now I wouldn't be surprised if my mind turned to mush…good-bye intelligence, hello stupidly…and don't I feel really dumb right now, I wond-hey what the hell is that?!'

Raito finally got around to noticing the strange markings above L's head…no _L Lawliet's head. _

'Oh shit…that's his life span isn't it? Why can't I read it?! Aren't I supposed to be able to understand shinigami language now that I'm part shinigami!?'

But before Raito could get anymore worked up about it the strange numbers started to shift and change into a sequence that he could understand now.

'Ok…that was strange, good though. Now let's see when L's death day is…WHAT!! Only about 2 years from now!?'

Raito was understandably shocked and appalled.

'What the hell L! That's barely a year after I killed you…shit did you chock on a candy or something?! Geez…what the hell am I going to do with you? Wait the lifenote…'

Raito started to quickly scan his strange new form; his wings especially would take some time to get use to. After remembering that his note was on the chain by his belt he quickly pulled it out.

It just looked so harmless…just like it's brother the deathnote…but this note _saved _lives…it didn't ruthlessly steal them like the deathnote did.

Raito was wondering just how many more years he should add to L when he finally noticed that something _very_ important was missing.

'Shit! I don't have a pen!'

Raito was just thinking of using one of his sharp claws to pierce his skin and write in his blood. He was also wondering if this notebook had any of its rules written down inside of it like the deathnote had.

He opened the life note was surprised to see a long slime white pen laying in between the pages that he had just randomly opened. It had strange symbols carved into it, kind of like the symbols that had marked the cave that the little Mother had resided in. It was strange though, it didn't seem like a normal pen…as if anything could possibly be normal in his life anymore. But still there was only a sharp fine point at the end; it was more a sharp piece of metal then any type of pen…oh.

'Well darn…I guess I _will_ have to use my blood as ink…I guess that makes sense, I am giving the people who I write down the names in this note some of my life-force. And blood is a major part of any type of life-force. Life blood equals longer life…heh I guess you could say that my blood is the Water of Life now. Ok then…you'd better appreciate this L…I won't put down too many years, after all if I get my way _and I know I will _you will be immortal like me soon enough.'

Raito lifted the sharp stick out of the lifenote and without further thought drove the sharp point of it into his wrist. He thought maybe if he could get to a vein that it would work better.

He watched in fascination as his blood welled up from the slightly jagged hole that he had just made. Surprisingly even though he was sure that he had just hit a vein not much blood spilled out. Only a few drops at most. He was glad though to see that the pen's point seemed to be covered enough in his blood to write with.

He watched as the small hole close up and heal like nothing had happened. Deciding to speculate about it later he turned to look at L.

…Who had seemed to have fallen asleep again without Raito noticing, L's head was leaning downward towards the empty shell of his body, his arms where also wrapped around Raito's body as if they were protecting it from some outside force, soft snores had once again started to fill the room again.

Raito then took the pen and opened the note back up and placed the point of the pen to the first page of the lined paper…he then proceeded to write L's name down and the extra life span that Raito would be giving him. After he was done he looked at the red lettering that marred the white piece of paper. He was amazed that something so simple could hold such significance for both him and the one he had written down. His orderly neat handwriting glared back at him.

_L Lawliet- 25 years_

It was as simply as that.

--

After that was done and said with, Raito just decided to float around and think. He resolute not to go back into his body just yet, there was so much that he could do and see in his shinigami form and he didn't really know how to come back into this form without having to have himself being knocked out.

Raito remembered that Ryuk had been able to control his body enough to walk around like a normal human so that's the first thing Raito tried to do. Floating was fun and all that but he would feel much more normal if his feet were firmly on the ground.

After a few failed attempts in which he hung upside-down more often then not, which he _thanked god_ that no one could see him right now, he finally was able to get his feet on the ground. He had absentmindly noticed that his shoes were no longer black with dirt from the shinigami realm, he was happy about that because if he had to have one character flaw it was that he was obsessed with cleanness…well if you don't call killing thousands of people and trying to take over the world a character flaw that is.

Raito had remembered to put away his lifenote but he had no idea what to do with the pen, it was only on a whim that he had placed it back in between the pages of the note and closed it that he noticed the notebook became flat like there was nothing in it.

'That's useful.'

After that Raito tried to see if he could become incorporeal enough so he could move through the wall. That actually proved much easier to do then his earlier attempts at grounding himself had. He just had to will his body to become intangible and then will it back when he wanted to touch something solidly.

He decided the moment that L and his body were safely out of this room that he would go exploring…I mean he was invisible to everyone and everything around him…why not have some fun?

'And also I need time to think of a plan of action…hmmm I bet the moment I wake up L will start asking about his name again and how I know it…maybe I can tell him a half-truth? Yes, that way L can't accuse me of lying to him. I just won't tell him all the facts. Also maybe he won't ask about…well, The Kiss. Shit, I'm thinking in underlined capitals now. Anyway he just might be too embarrassed by it and how he acted. I know for a fact that he is not disgusted by me touching him which is always a big plus. I could have sworn that I saw regret on his face when he punched me…ok it was more of a really hard slap, but in my defense my head hit the wall harder, enough so that I believe I might just have a slight concussion. Hmm to bad I can't play the guilt card, L just immune I guess.'

Raito entertained himself for the next hour by practicing his flying, which was really hard to do in such a small room but he did master how to hover at least. He was just getting use to his more…interesting appearance now that he had time to really look over himself. He chuckled to himself when he remembered that he had once told Ryuk when he was younger how he would have done a deal to get a shinigami's wings instead of doing the deal for the eyes. Well now he had the wings and he didn't even have to give half of his life for it…he had only to die first.

He was even starting to kind of like his appearance, well kind of anyway. He could have done without the straightjacket and long nails that resembled claws more then anything else, also long hair was really hard to tame, and his hair just kept getting tangled into his wings. He would have to either cut it off, or find a hair tie. As soon as he had thought that he felt something on his wrist. Looking down he saw a small white hair tie wrapped around it.

"Wow isn't that convenient."

After pulling his hair into a more manageable tail that flowed down his back and trailed right between his wings, leaving his poor wings in peace, he decided to take a look at the lifenote.

He opened the notebook again to start looking for any rules or guidelines and such stuff like that. He did find a few on the backside of the cover page. At first they were in that same kind of language that Raito had started to exasperatingly call the Shinigami Chicken Scratches, but they quickly started to morph into a more human language. Interesting enough they didn't become Japanese but English wording instead. He just gave a mental shrug and decided that must have been something that the Shinigami King and Ryuk had in common. They were just to lazy to think of a more individual language to fit the person the note went to, and just went with the most common language known to man.

After reading the first few rules which were the ones that the Shinigami King had already warned him about, like how he need the face and name of the person he wanted to write in the lifenote, how he need to write down the number of years that need to be added. How that the person who's name is written in the note can not be killed by a deathnote, and how he as the owner of the Lifenote was to under no circumstances ever write in a Deathnote with the intention of killing a human being. There were only two other rules in the LifeNote that the King had not talked about. Raito decided he would read them now.

His eyes widen a little in surprise when he read them. One was that he was only aloud to tell his intended about how he was an immortal shinigami; it was ok if a person figured out by themselves but he couldn't purposely leave any type of clue or hints about his true nature.

'Interesting…but I doubt anyone will come to the conclusion that I'm not human anymore…even more so that I'm an Immortal God of Death, or at least half anyway…hmm well maybe Near would be able to figure out something to that nature if he felt like it.'

Before he could read the other rule in the notebook a noise had him looking up. L had finally fallen forward in his sleep…the thing was when he did that he fell right on top of Raito's body. L had somehow managed to stay asleep as the top of his body curled right on top of Raito's chest. Raito saw that the top of L's head was just slightly touching his body's chin.

'Aww damn it! I really wish I could go back into my body right now! But still…who knows when the next time I'll be able to be in my shinigami form? Still…I really wish L had at least one camera in here…this is just too priceless a scene. I wonder what he's going to do Watari wakes him up. Hehe yea, just try to talk yourself out of that one L.'

Raito gave a slightly malicious laugh at the image that popped into his head at that thought, he then became intangible again and stuck his head out the door to see if Watari was there yet, just as he did that he saw that the elevator that had taken him and L to this floor opened up.

'Ah and here he comes now, maybe I should leave now…naw I just have to see what happens.'

He watched still with his head sticking out the door while the rest of him was back in the room as Watari came closer. He watched in fascination as Watari hunched over until he was right at the height of where L was usually at. Then he stared at a spot at the door. It was only then that Raito remembered about L saying that there was a retnal scanner you needed to pass to enter the room. After a moment he watched as Watari straighten back up and produced a key from one of his pockets.

Raito quickly stuck his head back into the room just as the door opened. He watched as Watari quickly walked in the room and wasn't really surprised as he saw him pull out a revolver out of his jacket just before he stepped into the room.

Raito started to smirk as he saw Watari freeze when he caught sight of his employer and his employer's suspect all cuddly and close.

Raito's snickering turned into full blown laughter as he saw Watari's mouth drop comically and a kind of stutter come out of his mouth. The revolver which had been poised to shot had almost fallen out of his hand in shock.

Sadly Watari got himself composed at lot sooner then Raito had hoped, what was even sadder was that L had still been asleep through all of it. Watari quickly put on his own mask of the polite kind keep-your- mouth-shut employee, but Raito knew that later L would get a stern talking too by Watari. Raito only hoped that he would still be in this form to witness it.

Watari had put away the dangling gun now that he saw that it was not needed. He must have noted though that both of them needed medical attention though because he quickly pulled out a roll of bandages out of one of his other pockets.

Watari walked quickly over to the still sleeping forms of both L and Raito and silently shook L awake.

Who then swiftly woke up, at first he just stared uncomprehending at Watari, as if he couldn't quite figure out what he was doing there.

Not two seconds later Raito could see as all the memories come back to him, he also just started to notice the position that he was in. Namely he was curled around the half naked form of Raito's body and was holding onto him like someone would suddenly take Raito away from him.

L didn't show any outer appearance of embarrassment in front of Watari but Raito knew that he must be totally humiliated inside.

Watari quickly helped L move Raito's body around so that L could stand up. Without a word between them Watari quickly handed L the bandages and then proceeded to pick up Raito's limp body. Raito just floated along beside them as they finally left that…damned room behind.

It was only as they had gotten in the elevator did Watari speak to L.

"Do you need to go to the infirmity? I could get a doctor to check on young Yagami-san."

L tried to look like he was thinking but it was obvious to anyone who was looking at him that he was exhausted. Raito guessed going hours without any water or food and never really getting enough sleep could even tire out the famous L, not to mention that they had spent hours fighting, and he just might still feel emotional drained from confessing a childhood trauma to his number one suspect. Yep, L had a right to be exhausted.

"No Watari I don't think that it will be necessary, I believe that Raito-kun is only suffering from a small concussion and our wounds aren't too serious. We just need to quickly get bandaged up, and I really do need to get some kind of sleep I guess. I'm not up to thinking to my fullest capacity right now and that would not be good for the case. So we will be adjuring to our room now. I will put on the handcuffs tomorrow and deal with everything then. If it's not too much trouble would it be alright if you check on Raito-kun every few hours tonight? I don't want him to slip in a deeper coma or anything like that. I'd do it myself of course but…"

Watari's expression had started to morph into a more empathic and understanding look. He really did care for his young employer and always did try to show L that he was only human and need to rest and relax once in a while just like the rest of them.

"I understand L, I will do as you say…though you needn't have asked, I would have done so anyway. Will you need any assistance with young Yagami-san?"

L's face had showed its silent thanks and gratitude at Watari's thoughtfulness. He quickly shook his head though at Watari's question.

"No that will not be necessary, I'm just going to put a few bandages around the worse of the wounds and then dump him on the bed. Anything else could wait till tomorrow."

Watari nodded his head to show that he understood. When the elevator had finally stopped on the floor that Raito assumed would be the one that he and L were going to share. Watari handed Raito's limp body to L who then proceeds to shoulder him in a fireman carry.

Watari didn't leave the elevator with L and just called out a goodnight as L moved out of the elevator and started to walk down the long hallway.

Raito who had been silent to himself as he watched all of this unfold in front of him looked around.

'Ah yes now I remember…yep this is the same floor as last time when L and I were handcuffed together…hmm I wonder if we will have separate beds this time? Last time a complained so much that L had finally relented and bought two double size beds to replace the king sized one that had been in their shared room previously…but this time I have no need to complain…actually the one bed will work to my advantage…hmmm well I just hope that L doesn't decide to change it any time soon.'

Raito who had been floating behind the walking form of L was so deep in thought that he almost floated by the still form of L who was unlocking a door.

Quickly doing an about-face while lightly blushing he started to walk into the room too when L closed the door in his face.

Luckily for Raito he could become incorporeal, so he didn't feel it as the door passed through half of his face. Still…he was kind of pissed at L for doing such a thing, even though he knew L couldn't see him at the moment he couldn't help but send L a dirty look.

Walking fully into the apartment that made up this entire floor Raito looked around and ignored L who had sat Raito's body down onto the bed in the bedroom and started to quickly treat some of Raito's more pressing wounds. Raito walked around and started to remember.

'Ah that's the sofa that L had stained after he tried to balance chocolate cake and jelly frosting…god was Watari pissed at that, heheh. And…ah yes the kitchen, if I remember rightly this was L's most favorite place…and if I'm not mistaken I bet the fridge is already stocked with a bunch of sugary treats. L if you didn't die of diabetes you'd die of a clogged artery. I need to start incorporating some fruits and vitamins rich foods into your diet again…sigh, that took forever last time…but at least now I know that you will at least try it if I put some type of sugar in it…which really defeats the whole purpose now that I think about it. Oh well, you'll be immortal soon enough I guess so all we have to worry about then is if you'd get fat…but I doubt you will, not with the fights we get into.'

After walking around a bit more and reminiscing about the past that was now his current present he quickly moved back into the bedroom.

It seemed that while he had been wandering around L had finished with bandaging both himself and Raito's body. At the moment L was maneuvering Raito around so that he could be in a semi-comfortable sleeping arrangement. That might not seem like much but for Raito who had just heard L tell Watari that he was just going to dump him on the bed and then forget about him for the rest of the night, well…he couldn't but feel a bit touched.

After L had pulled the covers up onto Raito's unconscious form, Raito noted that L had left his pants on, he then proceeded himself to turn off the overhead light and curl up on his side of the huge bed.

Raito watched for a bit as the gentle snores soon filled the room. As he was just about to leave to explore the outside world, he even had turned all the way around to face the window; he heard a soft shifting which pointed that one of the occupants on the bed where moving, and since he wasn't even inside his body for it to move it had to be L.

Raito had taken just a quick look back to see what L was doing. He had already been in the act of spreading his wings out to start to fly when he turned around.

The scene that greeted his eyes when he turned his head around was enough to make him stumble and almost caused him to do a summersault in mid-air.

L had somehow moved over from his side of the bed and was now engaged in cuddling Raito's still form.

'Oh my god…that is just waaayyy to cute. Wow if I didn't have such a great photogenic memory I would be frantically hunting down for a camera right now! Geez is he touched staved or what…well I guess I'll let him…cuddle me for tonight…argh I've really have become soft haven't I? First I let the Little Mother hug me and now it's L. oh well, I guess it could be worse…at least he's not molesting me in my sleep or anything like that…I'm _pretty_ sure he wouldn't do that…maybe I should stay here just in case.'

After arguing with himself for a few minutes Raito decided to give L the benefit of the doubt. He quickly took one last look at the two still forms on the bed before he jumped out of the window that faced the side of the wall.

He had forgotten it was a 50 floor foot drop.

After falling for about 20 or so floors he finally remembered he had wings and started to flap them frantically, when he started to gain altitude he told himself that he had _not_ screamed out like a little girl and to just put that whole humiliation scene behind him and never think about it again.

After looking at the sky he determined that it was around sometime in the early evening of the next day.

'Hmm so I was in that room for over half a day, sooo…what should I do now before I go back? I have only a few hours before L will wake back up and try to wake me up as well.'

Raito then made a decision.

'Its been a while since I saw my family…yes, I think I'll go see how mom and Sayu are doing and hopefully dad is relaxing too, though knowing him maybe not, hopefully mom and Sayu were able to convince him though, also…I need to see their life-spans…no matter what I will add to whatever number they are just so that they would be under my LifeNote's protection. So…I guess it's homeward bound.'

With that thought Raito started to soar through the darkening sky towards his home…the home he hadn't really thought of as home since he had first touched the DeathNote…and to the family that he had discarded the first time.

But not this time…this time he would not take for granted the warm loving family that had given him so much and who he had hardly given anything back too.

As Raito was flying through the air he had no indication of what awaited him at his house.

He had no notion of what was about to transpire. That would once yet again change his life.

For the better or more then likely for the worse.

If he had he just might of have stayed in the building with the sleeping L.

--

**Edited- 11/13/08**

I know that this is much shorter then my last chapter but…I have so much planned out for the next two or three chapters that I wanted to space it all in a lot more chapters. Just so that it wouldn't seem like to much is happening in one chapter. So instead of having all my plots/ideas in two or three chapters I'm going to space it like four or five instead. That might seem like my chapters will be really short but they won't be so don't worry. I promised myself that my chapters will never be lower then 10 or so pages…let's see if I can stick with that promise shall we?

The next chapter will have a surprised guest. Can you guess who it will be? Hmm give it your best guess; it doesn't matter if you're wrong or right but it could be fun to see what you all say. :) it will be a twist on the story yet again…oh yea this story might seem like it's going a little slow plot wise but that's just because this will be a very long story…so I'm pacing myself :-)

Also you might want to hurry on guessing who will be the surprising guest, I'm already writing the next chapter, hehehehe I can hear the readers squeals of joy XP

I made this chapter have a kind of a cliff-hanger because I'm mean like that ;p naw I did it because it seemed like a good place to stop it at. Still…you could review and tell me about what you think (HINT)

Also I have a very important question to pose to all my readers…what do you think of the idea of an mpreg? Not in this story but maybe in a sequel? If I get enough positive feedback on it, I will have a kind of epilogue at the end of this story beginning the introduction of a sequel…truth be told I already have a really good idea for that story and would love to write it…but let's just see what you all have to say nee? Remember that they will be immortals…so it will be very different then the traditional mpreg. Also it will be my type of mpreg…which means not much detail on the pregnancy itself, but the story behind it and all that…it would actually be really action pack and angsty and plot driven… but filled with yaoi goodness with our two favorite boys. Maybe I'm posting this to earlier in the story…I'll ask again when I get to the half-way mark in my story and have a more detailed description of what I mean.

**Review please!**


	9. Chapter 9

Warnings: More Shinigami Raito, language, humor, lots of angst, Raito's family, and…the special guest!

Thank you all again for reviewing my story! Here are my responses to my wonderful reviewers!

Dark Oracle, - Yea for a filler chapter it was kind of cute wasn't it? Your welcome, I love answering my reader's questions! (or at least I do now that I'm really into reading and writing again :) and you all have such real questions it would be cruel not to answer them (that happens to me a lot T-T) Thank you for the positive feedback on my mpreg sequel idea! Yes I have to admit…I don't know much on pregnancy myself…0.o, so it would be more plot-driven story-line kind of story with while the pregnancy will be important to the story plot it will not entirely focus on it. At least with the swell feet and morning sickness and such…0.o …anyway that story won't be for a very long time…hehe I've got to finish this one first…and this will be LONG! Awww I hug you back!

Vanity, - I know that my last cliff-hanger could have been a bit mean of me…heehee(evil writer snicker of doom)…0.o ok moving on from that…really, angst? Hmmm I really didn't see it that much…o…k… never mind I just reread what I wrote…wow Raito's just not having a very good day at all it seems…I might just have to give him some ice cream to stave off any spontaneous fits of crying XP. It's cruel when the author doesn't respond to the reviewer just because their not signed in _(I should know I use to be one of those cruel authors…sorry all my past reviewers to my other stories!! TT)_ I will always try from now on to respond to all my wondrous reviews. So expect to have me respond to any review you leave from now on :-) I also want to know where I found the image of L spilling chocolate cake and jelly frosting from, right after I wrote it down and actually read what I had written I laughed myself silly, and I love how Raito was just acting nonchalant about it ;-) I believe that sitting down for about 4 hours straight in a dim room with only my L plushy for company messed with my brain hehe lucky for all of you the more messed up my mind is the better the story plot gets. :P I will try not to rush my story plot…which will make this one heck of a very long story…but I guess that's a good thing… Raito will add around 20 to 30 years to everyone else mostly to make sure they live a full life (I made a lot of people close to death in my story ) also it really looks better then just writing 5 or 10 years down, it makes him seem like he cares for them more if he wrote more years down then fewer. I only did 25 for L because…well he's 25 right now and I couldn't get it out of my head of what L would look like if he were 50! O.0 I know, hit the poor author…it won't mean he's going to need those 25 extra years (because Raito will ensure that he gets his way :) it's just that I couldn't get it out of my head… **One more thing,** YES Raito can use his LifeNote in his human form THIS WILL BE VERY IMPORTANT LATER ON. IT IS A BIG PLOT POINT!! Hehe hope that answers any of your questions XP

Detective1412, - I know that I already responded to your reviewer earlier but I still have to say it here. Thank you so much for reviewing my story and I'm glad you like it! :) I would absolutely love a fan trailer for 'Darkness within your Light' Feel free to make one, I would love to see it when you're done! :-)

G-Wing Gurl, - My god…you almost got it!! I didn't really think anyone would guess so closely…0.o wow…that's really good :) I'm very happy your liking my story and it is quite original if I do say so for myself (I'm so proud of my little fic, sniffs, it's growing so big and strong! heh) Yea positive feedback on my mpreg sequel idea!! I know about the little Lira (hehe cute name) I just wanted to make a chibi L soooo badly! Thank you for the review :-)

Black-Dranzer-1119, - I'm so happy you find my story awesome! Sorry but you will have to wait till the end of this chapter for Raito to go back into his body. T-T but you have to admit that Shinigami Raito is cool :) hehee I love keeping my readers in the unknown it's just waaayyyy to much fun otherwise.

Kyorose, - wow someone else has figured it out…though now that I think about it, it is kind of easy to figure out…0.o hmmm I need more unpredictable plot twists…hmm (talks to plushy L and get's his take on it) don't worry about why a shinigami would want to see Raito…it will all make sense (or at least as much as I want it to :) heheh I love evil cliff-hangers (hey, at least I don't leave my chapters months apart between evil cliffys ;p)

Pouf, - Hiya! I replayed to you earlier buttttt…Thank you sooo much for reviewing me and I really _really_ do enjoy your reviews (really look forward to them :) Like I said in my replay earlier to you**,** my idea of mpreg will be more plot then the preg itself, it will be more of a action, angst, PLOT-worthy story, hehe put like I said I will not really think about it earlier because I'll working on this story first. I do hope u like my answer for the Seme/Uke pairing between our two cute boys! And because only you have asked the question I have told only you! So I will not type the answer here for anyone to read. **(that means that anyone who wants to know who the Seme and Uke in this story is you have to ask me!!) **Thank you sooo much for your review, it really made my day.

Toraus, - I also love Shinigami Raito! The whole reason I started this story was to create a shinigami Raito…my story kind of grew from there…o.O I love Raito's and L's and Watari's funny acts! Its just so much fun to write, thank you for reviewing and hope you continue to enjoy it ;D

Anna, - I'm really glad your enjoying my story! :) heheh I hope I do the Yagami family justice. Thank you for reviewing hope u enjoy it as I continue.

BishounenYaoiLover, - Yea, Raito is just too cute for words in that chapter…hehe I can see him trying to fly failing miserable for his first few attempts. I also noticed that mpreg with Raito was rare, well Death note mpreg period is Rare. Thanks for the positive feedback on that- Nooo it's not Mikami or the whammy boys…though I did think about Mikami for a while before I realized it would not _make any sense in the story whatsoever XD _oh well really good guess though.

Zackami, - Thank you!! I'm really glad your enjoying my fic - it makes an author feel all cozy inside. Awww the boys are cute aren't they. YEA!! Another positive feedback on my sequel mpreg idea! You don't have to worry about losing plot, that will never happen in this series (at least I really hope not x.x) but seriously I will always have a plot-line, _even_ when it's really hard to see.

Fantasies4eva, - you don't really have to worry about the mpreg in **this** story, it's not going to happen…Maybe in the sequel (when I get done with this and my mind hasn't exploded I will think about writing it but that won't be for a long time in the future)…Yes evil cliffs galore! Hehehe, don't worry no one will be dying…yet.

Yoshiluvr, - Not you rock more!! (something tells me that we might be at this for a while.) I'm happy that you'll be reading this for a long time to come(became this monster will be long!!) hehe, ah I know what you mean about the mircosoft word thing I had my computer for months before we got around to having to go buy the word process stuff(150!!) my own money too…TT-TT. I remember having some great ideas I really wanted to write down and I can't take a pencil and paper and write them down, I just _can't_ (don't ask why I don't know) now I can't remember any of them since it's been so long. Anyway thank you for reviewing and I can't wait to see more!

Chibi Tsuki Hikari, - You go girl! Dance till you drop in happiness! XDDD yea, I'm glad that this last chapter was your favorite; it was a pleasure to write :) I also love frantic L!! He's just sooo cute when he's freaking out! hehee I'm glad someone else also noticed that the two laughs are the same XP thank you for the wondrous fantastic comments!

Well I hope you all enjoy this long awaited chapter (it's been less then a week O.x) sooooo….read on my faithful readers!! XDDDD

And always remember to review and tell dear aunty aura what you think. .

--

Raito was flying through the still air, enjoying the quietness of the moment.

It was only when Raito was halfway in the direction to his house did he even remember that he hadn't even taken the time to looked at Watari's name or life-span. Raito felt like he could kick himself.

'Oh well, before I go back into my body I'll just have to look at his name and life-span…I guess I was kind of preoccupied at the time, but still…'

After mentally hitting himself over the head for a few minutes for his glaring error, he decided not to think about it till he had to.

He almost failed to realize that he had already arrived at his destination.

'It seems so…normal. Like nothing has changed…and in some ways nothing did, but in so many ways everything changed. '

With that oddly sad thought he decided to go in. He flew down to street level and stood outside the gate.

Even though he knew he could just fly in and walk through the walls without anyone seeing him he for some reason didn't want that, he wanted to enter the house like he would have done as a human. Like he had done before…before everything…before…when he had just been Yagami Raito…son of Yagami Soichiro and Yagami Sachiko, big brother to Yagami Sayu…just a normal human being.

'Hn there was a time when I hated that. A time when I wanted more, I hated the normalcy, the boring life that I lead. The normal loving family I had…I hated them didn't I? I may not have fully realized it but…I resented them. They were so happy…content with their boring dull lives…and I hated that. I was never happy, never satisfied, even as a small child I always felt misplaced, like I didn't belong with them…at a young age I had perfected my polite contented mask…so much that I even kind of tricked myself…I tricked myself into believing that I was happy…well more like contend with my life that I had…even if it was boring, I didn't really believe that it needed changing. So I acted the loving dutiful son, the kind trusting brother…I tricked myself into believing that I had cared…that I loved my family…and this was even before I had touched the Deathnote…what kind of monster was I really? I wish I could answer that myself but…all I can do now is change…no…not change…I just need to really open myself to others…to not close myself anymore in the fear that no one would except me for who I really am…I just got to start to trust that my family will love me unconditional…and why wouldn't they? When have they ever not showed me that they loved me? God…I really never knew myself at all…even less I hardly know the people around me…well that's going to change…I can start with my father and L right now, because they are the only ones that I will be seeing for a while…but after…after I get my name cleared forever from the taint of Kira…I will spend time with Sayu and mom…I do care for them. They are the ones I wanted to save…the ones I wanted to make a better world for…yes that's what I'll do the moment I get out of under L's thumb, I will get closer to my family. Heh though I won't be entirely out of L's watch…because by that time he will always be beside me. First though, let's see how my family is doing.'

With that last thought, Raito began to move. He walked ghostly through the front gate and walked up the walkway towards the door that housed his family…his home.

He stood right in front of the doorway that would take him inside. He already knew his family was home. The car was parked only a few feet away from him. That would mean that they had decided to do a family night together at home.

He remembered those, mom and Sayu had to bribe him with cookies when he was younger to get to play along with them for family night. It was a rare thing to have because his father had rarely been home. He had always been on some kind of big case, and while that had made the younger him proud it also really annoyed him. His mother and Sayu always made such a big fuss when his father came home for the night and had time to actually spend with his family. He had hated it. He didn't like the idea of sitting around the living room with all of his family there. Sayu always tried to get them to play board games together. His mom wanted to watch a nice movie and maybe have a nice family chat.

His father had always talked to him about either his grades and or cases he had been working on and wanted his son's intake on them. His mother always scolded his father about how that wasn't talk they should be having when they were supposed to be talking about pleasant things. But Raito knew that she also like hearing about how well he was doing and how smart he was.

Never once had any of them ever asked about how he felt or his personal thoughts. He guessed that might have something to do with why he felt such resentment for his family then…but he could now see that it had also been his fault. He was so emotionally closed that they hadn't even known him at all. At least they didn't know the Raito behind the carefully made masks that he presented to the world.

He now knew that it hadn't been either of their faults, not his family and not himself. It had just been the way things were at the time.

But no longer. Taking a deep breath Raito mentally prepared himself and then walked through the closed door.

He was home.

--

Raito just stood in the entry way of his home. A strange feeling of contentment washed over him. He couldn't stop the slightly goofy smile that crossed his face, but he didn't mind…it wasn't like anyone could see him anyway.

With that thought he remembered that he was in his shinigami form and didn't really have a whole lot of time to spend here before he had to get back into his human body…he wanted to make sure he woke up before L.

When dark and slightly dirty thoughts started to invade his mind he quickly shook his head and started forward, he didn't hear anyone in the house…which was strange…he would have thought he would hear them if they were home, the car was still here so they had to not of left so…the question was why was it so quite?

Without realizing it he had started to quicken his pace as he walked around the house, he heart was beating so fast and his breath was coming in and out in short panicked shots. He ignored all that and just started looking.

First was the kitchen, his mom hardly ever left it when she was home…but no one was there…he could vaguely smell a slight scent of something his mom made…most likely the breakfast she and Sayu had eaten this morning. But everything was cleaned up and spotless, just like his mother liked it. Nothing seemed out of place so he left.

Next was the living room, that would have to be his best bet on where everyone had to be…it was were they all went to when his father was home, family night was usual spent there. Most likely because it was were they could all relax and enjoy themselves without it being too crowed.

He practically ran towards the entrance to the living room. There was a hope in his heart that said maybe they were all in there and the reason they were all quite was because they were all occupied with something. Like his father might be reading a book in his favorite lounge chair, his mother would be sitting on the couch with her knitting and little Sayu would be sprawled on the floor trying to do her math homework she always had trouble doing, but she always went to her big brother for help with it when it got to difficult, it wasn't even that she really had trouble with it, Raito knew it was her only excuse to spend time with him without sounding like a nagging sister. Raito felt slight guilt in that, Sayu shouldn't have to make up excuses to see and talk to her older brother; she should be able to talk to him whenever she wanted. But because of the distance he maintained with his family he wasn't really surprised that she would have found it difficult to approach him otherwise.

But just as he got to the doorway that opened up to the sitting room, he had a slight fear that it would be empty…

He walked into it right after that….

And found out that indeed, there was no one present in the room.

--

"Were the hell could they be?!"

Raito couldn't help but yell out in frustration and more then a little fear.

He quickly scanned the rest of the bottom of the house, but still…his family was no where to be seen.

'Ok I've got to calm down, maybe...maybe they just went for a walk or something…or they might already be asleep in their rooms…yea that plausible…I mean it is getting rather late and they all probably had a really long day…yes I'll just check their rooms.'

With this thought racing through his head Raito quickly left the sitting room and practically raced up the stairs.

First he checked Sayu's room mostly because it was the first bedroom closes to the stairs. He melted through the closed door and looked around inside. The lights were off but it was clearly empty. What startled him even more then there being no Sayu in the room was its clearly messed up state. Sayu while not being obsessed with order and cleanness like her brother did always make sure her room was at least picked up and clean.

But the state of the room now could only be described as a chaotic scene. Cloths were stewed around the room, the bed was unmade and there seemed to be papers and books all over the floor and on top of the bed and the small desk that sat her prized small stuffed animal collection…or had once held her precious collection.

He walked over to the desk, where once sat cute fluffy stuffed plushiest now held books.

And not typical teenage books either, these were books on law and criminology and stuff like that. He could even see a few of his own books were here as well.

Raito was speechless.

Why would his little sister be reading this stuff? She had shown no real interest before of thinking about going into law enforcement. In actuality she had only ever shown a slight distain at her father's and older brother's obsession with it. She knew it was important and all and she did respect it, she just didn't like that it always seemed to tare the family apart.

'But if she dislikes it so…why is she reading about it? Why-I don't get it at all. Sayu-she's just a kid! She shouldn't even…I don't…I need to see her, NOW.'

Raito did an abrupt about-face and hurried out of the room.

He tried his parent's room next, maybe they were all in there?

But he didn't even try to hope this time, so he wasn't disillusioned when he found yet another empty room when he fazed into his parent's room.

'Where are they?!'

There was only one other place in the whole house that he had not checked.

His room.

'But-why would they be in there!?'

Raito didn't really believe that his family would all be in his room…so that meant that they just weren't in the house at all.

'Where would they go though? It's getting really late now…maybe they are at one of their friends houses and they got picked up instead of driving themselves?'

Still…he decided he would check his room first before flying out and looking for them elsewhere.

He stood outside his own closed room. If he kept his eyes closed and blanked his mind he could even forget that he was a hybrid god of death at the moment. He could pretend that he was Raito, just Yagami Raito who was standing outside his door in his home, and that his parents and sister were here to greet him…

Raito shook his head at his own foolishness, it was useless to pretend, and reality was harsh that way. You could only pretend for so long that everything was ok when it really wasn't.

He shook his head one more time and then looked determinedly at the closed door of the room that was-_use to be_ his inner sanctuary.

He then fazed right through the door, for some reason unknown to himself he had closed his eyes right before his head had passed through the barrier that was his door. He waited till he was sure that his entire body was through all the way inside before he opened his eyes.

The sight that greeted him made his eyes widen in shock and disbelief. A low sound of disbelief left his lips which had opened in his shocked state, giving him a look that greatly resembled a gapping goldfish.

His family was in his room and what was more…they were all sleeping on his bed.

--

'Wh-what the-'

Raito for the first time that he could remember was at a complete loss for words. Never had he been so utterly speechless before, and that was saying something, given all that he had been through in his short life.

His father was stretched out laying with his back resting on the bed frame, so that he was almost in a sitting position, his mother was cuddling on his left side, her head resting just beneath his fathers chin, she was holding onto something in her arms…Raito took a closer look and was shocked again when he saw that it was a picture of him. It was an older picture of him when he had been a kid, somewhere in middle school maybe. His mom seemed to have a kind of death grip on it; like she was afraid someone would try to take it away from her at some point.

Raito quickly looked on his father's other side and…yep there was Sayu. She seemed to also be cuddling up to their father but not as much as their mother was it seemed. She had her head resting on their father's stomach and also seemed to be holding something…

Raito floated closer, he didn't even realize that he had unconsciously started to hover with his wings out.

He took a closer look at Sayu's hands…and he gave up being upset with being constantly shocked, it seemed he was doomed to be in a permanent state of shock for a while.

Because what Sayu was holding on were in actual two things, one was an old stuffed panda bear that he had given Sayu on the day that she was born. He could remember that day clearly even though he had been only around three at the time. His father had brought his mother home from the hospital after about five days of being there. Raito himself had to stay with a family friend at the time because he couldn't stay at the hospital like his dad could. He remembered his mother coming inside the house all exhausted looking…but she had also looked completely and utterly happy. Raito could remember looking at the small bundle of pinkness that his mother had been holding. His father had taken the bundle from his mother and helped her to the living room. He had followed from his place on the stairs; they hadn't seen him so he wasn't mad that they hadn't greeted him. Even at the age of 3 he had been smart, his mask had been placed on by then, it hadn't been perfected yet…but it had still been good enough to fool people with. Even his own parents.

He was holding onto a stuffed panda his father and mother had given him when he had first been brought home after he'd been born, he had taken quite a shine to the white and black bear and took it with him where ever he went.

He had taken the stuffed bear with him when he went to see his mother and father who he hadn't seen for what seemed to him at the time like forever. He remembered seeing his mother and father cuddling on the couch, cooing to the pink bundle that his mother had taken back from his father.

His father had looked up the moment Raito had walked through the door, Raito remembered that he had smiled a smile that he didn't see all that often anymore. It held such contented happiness that it had faintly shocked him at the time. His father and mother who were still on the couch had beckoned him over to also look at the pink bundle; he had been skeptical but had indulged them. He remembered walking towards them and having his father pick him up to join in the cuddling too. He had peered down into the blanket, trying to see what all the excitement that had been going on for months was all about.

His first impression had been that it was as pink as the blanket it was wrapped in. After that he had asked his father what it was. Even nowadays he was still sometimes teased in good-humor by his mother about his question. Raito remembered how they had laughed at the time and told him that the baby was his new sister, Sayu.

He had been kind of shocked, oh it wasn't like he hadn't heard that his mom was having another baby but…it really hadn't processed through. He had been so busy with his own life that he kind of filtered out everything else.

He had taken another look at the pink bundle that was his new little sister, his father seeing his new interest had asked if he wanted to hold her. He had been speechless at the time. _Hold_ her?! He didn't even know if he liked her yet!

His father had taken his silence as agreement and had taken Sayu from his mother's arms and placed the baby very carefully in Raito's arms. Raito had stood shocked still, afraid that he might somehow break her and upset his parents. His father had rearranged the blanket so he could better see the baby. He had to admit…it was kind of cute.

He remembered looking at the softly sleeping baby and he had just sat there with her cradled in his arms for a long time. He couldn't believe how…innocent seeming the little girl was...Raito felt something at that moment that he had never felt before…he felt fondness and protectiveness flow through him. He vowed then and there to always protect and look after Sayu…after all she was _his_ baby sister.

After a while she had begun to fuss and his mother had quickly taken her back. He could remember how he had felt some kind of emotion at his mom for taking away the baby from him. He knew now that it had been resentment and jealously he had felt, but he didn't know that then so he just sat there confused and upset.

His mother couldn't seem to calm down little Sayu and his father couldn't either. He could remember how tired they had been and so…he took charge.

After telling his mother that she should go to bed he had then proceed to try to take the baby back. His parents had though that he was just being cute and had laughed at him. His mother though had decided to humor him somewhat and had very carefully handed back the baby, making sure that Raito was fully supporting it.

Raito remembered feeling very helpless at that moment. What could he do to make his little sister stop crying? What would make her happy? Raito decided to take a different though process to this. What made _him_ happy?

And then Raito knew the answer. His panda made him happy. It had always been there to listen and comfort him when he had nightmares or just needed to talk with someone, it was his best friend, his only friend. He didn't get along with the other children his age because he felt that they were beneath him and unworthy to get to know him. But…his panda had always brought a smile to his face, even if he never really showed people that smile…maybe it will make Sayu smile too.

With that thought in mind Raito quickly grabbed his panda which had been laying on the couch next to him. Being very careful he showed his panda to his little sister.

Sayu who had been crying non-stop for what seemed to be hours suddenly went silent. She was gazing curiously at the sudden appearing bear which was taking up a lot of her sight. She then started to giggle and reached out with small cubby hands to reach out to touch the panda.

Raito gave a small sigh of sadness mixed in with satisfaction and then did something he had never done before **and** which he never did again.

He gave up his panda, his comfort, the only thing that he had cared about. He gave it up for someone else. For his little sister he had selfish-less given up something which he had deemed important.

He gave up his one true friend…Ryu.

--

Raito shook his head as the memories seemed to overcome his thoughts, he had thought that his mom had thrown away that old stuffed animal. It was really worn and one of its button eyes were missing, also its right arm was in danger of falling off completely, it had already lost most of it stuffing years ago from Sayu's rough hugging. But there it was, right in front of him, Ryu…his old stuffed toy which had once been his best friend…

Raito quickly looked at the other object that his sister was holding, wanting to get off the subject of his old bear…for some reason just looking at it made him feel really sad and happy all at once.

He looked at the book that Sayu was cradling to her chest just as softly as she was doing with the bear and his mom was doing with the old photo of him.

On closer inspection he was shocked to see it was his old beginners guide to criminal law. It had been the first book that his father had given him when Raito had expressed the desire to follow in his father's footsteps.

Raito couldn't have been more confused…why? Why is Sayu studying law…especially criminal law?

He just shook his head for what felt like the hundredth time in the last hour. He took in the whole picture of what his family looked like and he felt a warmth course through him that he had never quite felt before.

They were all sleeping peacefully on his bed…like they were trying to be close to him in sleep when they couldn't while they were awake. Raito then noticed the tear tracks on all their faces and couldn't help but feel guilt.

They really did love him…truthfully more then he felt he deserved. He didn't know how he could pay them back for all that they had done for him…but he knew one thing…he would try his hardest to make sure his family knew that he loved them back just as much as they loved him…and he would make sure to insure their happiness.

Raito gave a small smile as that thought crossed him mind, it disappeared as he remembered why he was there is the first place.

'Right their life-spans…well let's see now…'

With that thought coursing through his brain Raito looked up above his family's heads to look at their name and remaining time.

His mind went blank as he stared at the glowing red numbers.

He couldn't comprehend what he was seeing…no it wasn't like he couldn't comprehend it…it was that he _didn't_ want to comprehend it.

All of his family…his mother, his father, and little Sayu…all of their life-spans matched completely…they all had the same death-day…and that day was….

_Today…._

--

Or to be more specific they were scheduled to die in about 4 hours…

'How-why…they can't die! I don't remember them being this close to death in my other life…I know the King had said that things will be different in this time-line then the other one…but…this is too much!!'

Raito was only now trying to figure out _how_ they were suppose to die…

'Gas leak? No…how about armed robbery? Hmmm possible…I doubt they take their own lives…what the hell happens in 4 hours? And even if I give them extra years on their life-span…whatever happens will still happen…what can I do?!'

Raito was getting very frustrated over the situation, he couldn't seem to come up with a good enough plan…how was he suppose to stop something when he didn't know what he had to stop!?

Even though Raito didn't know what was going to happen he still pulled out his Lifenote and opened it up to the page that he had wrote L's name. After just staring at that for a moment or two he quickly picked up the sharp tool that he used as a pen and jammed it again into his wrist. Only this time he didn't calculate the force that he had put into the slashing like last time, the result of this was he had the metal sticking out of the other side of his hand.

'ok…owie.'

After carefully pulling the blood drenched pen out of his arm he dismissed his bleeding wound and started to write his family's name in the lifenote, first his father's then his mother's then finally Sayu's.

_Yagami Soichiro- 30 years-peaceful_

_Yagami Sachiko- 30 years-peaceful_

_Yagami Sayu- 50 years-peaceful_

Raito just stared at the blood drenched page; his blood had run a bit but not enough for the words to smudge unreadable. He had made it so that his mother and father would die around the same time. He knew how much they loved each other and no matter what they would have wanted to die peacefully together.

As for Sayu…she was still so young…he wanted her to live life to the fullest so he had given her half a century to enjoy to do just that. He had wanted his family to life rich lives and goddamnit he would make sure that happen. Also if they had to die in the future he wanted to make it a painless one as possible.

Still…he didn't like the fact that his family had been going to die in a few hours…Raito decided then and there that he would stay here till that damned time came and he saw for himself what was going to happen.

--

The hours flew by quickly enough…Raito entertained himself by floating around the house and thinking of all the wicked stuff he could do to L when he got back…or have wicked stuff done to him _by_ said detective.

Flushing a deep royal red at the thoughts that quickly flew through his head at _that_ thought he moved over to the nearest wall and quite loudly started to bang his head on it, in the hope that it would knock out all those kinky thoughts.

'My god! What the hell is wrong with me? Is this just recently that I've developed such a dirty mind or has it always been like this and I just never noticed? Geez…I can now safety say that I can never call L a true pervert anymore…I'm the one with the more perverted mindset.'

After knocking his head a few more times in the wall and only succeeding in giving himself a really bad headache and not doing a thing about the naughty thoughts that were running rampaged around his mind, he moved over to the clock that sat on his desktop in his room. His family was still slumbering on his bed and had yet to wake up.

The clock showed that he had only about 10 minutes left until the event that would have ended his family's life if he hadn't come home and given them the extended years on their life-force.

Raito's face became hard, stone coldness filled his expression. It was what he usually looked like as Kira, and while he didn't really like that it was so similar to his Kira expressions, he knew that even though he himself was no longer Kira…the darkness will still always be apart of him for the rest of his life, it was a part of him as the lifenote now was, like his wings were, like any other part of him. It was what helped shape Raito into Raito.

He quietly and quickly moved over to hover over his sleeping family that was still on his bed. He spread out his wings so that they spanned over them, seemly to offer their protection to his family.

Raito looked around, his cold façade still plastered on, right when his clock ticked to the destined time Raito felt a cold shiver go down his spine.

But still…looking around he saw that nothing was out of place…everything was still peaceful and his family looked ok…so….what the hell happened?

After a few more minutes in which nothing happened Raito even started to let his guard down a little. Surely if something was suppose to happen it would have happened by now?

Just as Raito was almost completely relaxed a sudden noise caused him to tense once again, though not in preparation this time but in…fear.

"Hukukukuku I did not expect this at all."

Raito felt his head move up to one of the corners of his bedroom where a sudden shadow had appeared.

Raito felt frozen both inside and out. He had certainly not expected to see _him_ here.

"Aww aren't you going to say anything to your long lost…friend? Hukukuk…so Raito why don't you tell me what I've missed while I was gone…like…why are you now a shinigami?"

Raito stared into the cold-dead-fishlike eyes of the monster that had truly started it all. He was in a way more to blame for the birth of Kira then anyone else.

Raito pushed down any fear that he may have been feeling and made sure his mask was on…well he guess the game was back on…

"Hello to you to…Ryuk."

--

(should I end it here?...)

-

-

-

(Nawww u all will kill me) x.x

--

Raito's mind was racing a mile a minute, trying to come up with some explanation on why Ryuk was here…now…in his house…just when his family was suppose to die…GODDAMNIT!!

Raito turned a hard unpleasant glare at the floating shinigami beside him. After Raito had greeted Ryuk he had asked him, well more like demanded that they talk outside.

So here they were, floating about 6 or so feet above his childhood home.

"Ryuk…just why are you here? I thought I told you to stay in the Shinigami Realm till I got back your notebook, not to mention its only been a few hours since I gave up ownership of it…so yet again I ask you, why where you at my family's home?!"

Ryuk just gave out another one of his dry sounding chuckles. Raito really _really_ wanted to kill him right now, especially if his theory of why Ryuk was here was true.

Finally after a few minutes of only listening to Ryuk's ugly chuckle Raito got tired of it and flew back into his house, he quickly went to the kitchen and picked up a red juicy apple and flew back out before Ryuk could even think of questioning him on where he went, not that he really would especially not when he just saw what Raito had brought back with him.

"Apple!!"

"Yes Ryuk it's an apple…now…will you please tell me why you are here?"

Raito thank god that he could manipulate Ryuk with such an easy object…now if Ryuk had been obsessed with caviar...well that would have been harder to obtain.

"huh…oh that well I was really starting to get bored and all again and I really didn't like how you assumed that you could boss me around so I decided to kill your family. In fact I wrote there names in my Deathnote a few minutes ago…but they didn't die, why's that anyway?"

Raito was speechless as he listened to Ryuk causally tell him that he tried to kill his family like it was nothing. He felt a black rage take over him at Ryuk's dismissal of the importance of his family.

"They are _alive_ **Ryuk** because I wrote their names in _my_ LifeNote, and **No** I'm not going to tell you what that is nor will I tell you why I'm a shinigami right now. In fact…"

Raito turned around so he was fully facing the still drooling moron of a shinigami who was so fixed on looking at the apple in his hand when he should have been looking at the black rage that was gathering in Raito's expression. If he had he would have guessed what Raito was about to do. But alas he did not so Ryuk was totally unprepared for what Raito was going to do within the next few seconds.

"In fact Ryuk…I don't think you really deserve this apple…yes and if you don't deserve it…well I might as well get rid of it."

With that said Raito held the shiny red apple that Ryuk was staring at right under Ryuk's nose and…crushed it into pulp.

"AHHH NOOOO MY APPLE!!"

Raito's ears were slightly ringing from Ryuk's scream of anguish at seeing the lovely apple destroyed right in front of him.

Raito started to laugh in a malicious way but was cut off as Ryuk screamed in anger this time.

"You fucking apple hating freak!! I may not be able to kill you that much I can tell, and for some fucked up reason I can no longer kill your pathetic family…but I can make it so that they suffer painfully."

Raito was confused about what Ryuk meant, he watched as the Ryuk pulled out his deathnote and start to look down at the street, apparently looking for something. Apparently he found what he was searching for since he started to write in his notebook, an even darker malevolent chuckle came out of his mouth then Raito's own.

Raito was more then confused and quite frankly freaked out and not a little scared. What is Ryuk doing? Raito knew that Ryuk could be very ingenious and cruel when it suited him and quite frankly it worried Raito. Maybe he shouldn't have crushed the apple?

Ryuk seemed down with whatever he was doing, he gave another chuckle over what ever he had written down and then faced the worried Raito.

"Well Raito...hukukuk, I think you would have even been impressed with me if this didn't involve you…hukukuku why don't you take a look for yourself, I would love to see how you try to stop this from happening…HUKUKUKUKUKUKUKUUKUKUKKUUK!!"

…Ok now Raito wasn't just worried he was downright terrified.

He flew over the small distance that separated the two of them and took the held out deathnote from Ryuk; he couldn't stop his shiver of disgust at holding the evil thing.

He looked at the page that Ryuk had written down in not a minute ago. What he saw caused him to freeze with so much horror he almost threw up. Because what was written on the page was something that he had to stop at all costs.

_At 9 pm Temino Gin will leave his house making sure that no one saw him, going down the street till he reached the Yagami household, he decides that he hated the family and so he broke in the house as silently as possible not alerting anyone inside, the then proceeds to go into the kitchen and takes a huge kitchen knife, he also takes some duck tape from the material drawer and a then proceeds to go up the stairs being very quite and goes to the third door on the right. He will see three members of the Yagami household sleeping, he then takes the youngest Yagami and tapes her mouth shut, making sure to threaten her with the knife if she screams, he also tapes her hands and feet up to make sure she doesn't move. He then wakes up the rest of the family and also tapes them up, threatening to kill their daughter if they don't cooperate. After that is done he starts to torture them with the knife, using non-lethal but painful methods. He rapes both women and scares them heavily, cutting out their eyes and tongues, he then starts to torture the male Yagami by cutting off both his hands and feet, he then proceeds to tell him how he will also enjoy playing with his son as soon as he was done with them. After about 5 more hours of torture he leaves them broken and bleeding but alive in the room. He then walks out of the house and walks to the nearest intersection and flings himself in front of a car. Dies instantly at 2 am. _

'No…no…NO!!'

Raito heard Ryuk's dry laughs as he read what was in front of him…Ryuk knew that he couldn't kill the Yagami family…but he could make them suffer a fate worse then death could ever be.

"I won't let this happen!!" Raito roared out in pure black rage.

"Well then you better hurry…it's now 8 o'clock, you got one hour to save them before what I wrote in the deathnote comes true. Hukukuku how will you do this Raito when you're nothing but a ghost right now? HUKUKUKUKUKUKU…"

Raito felt like ice water had been thrown on his back. He had forgotten that no one could see him right now…but…

"You'll see Ryuk! I won't let this happen! You'd better watch out from now on…you will PAY for this!"

With that Raito started to fly as fast as he could back to the Kira investigation headquarters. Ryuk's dry infuriating chuckles followed him but soon died out as he got farther and farther away.

'I may not be able to do much…but…L can!'

Raito didn't even think about what he was going to tell L, all he knew was that his family was in danger and he had to save them. But if he couldn't…he knew that L could.

'Please…please believe me Lawliet."

--

Raito could have cried in relief as he saw the headquarters right ahead of him, too much time had passed as far as he was concerned, it may have been only about 15 minutes but still…that was 15 minutes wasted in getting back to make sure his family was safe.

Raito flew through the window which opened up to his and L's bedroom. Not much had changed since he had left. Ryuzaki was still cuddled in Raito's arms, if he had the time he would have been surprised that his body seemed to have moved even without him in it, it was like his body knew that it should be cuddling and comforting Ryuzaki. But since Raito didn't have the time it was only dimly noted in the back of his mind.

Raito quickly moved over to the bed and hovered over his body, he wasn't quite sure what he had to do but decided that he just had to will himself back into his human shell.

After taking a second to do just that Raito felt a tingling sensation spread through his body before he blacked out.

Not a minute later he woke back up. Only this time he was staring at the ceiling, and in his arms was a softly snoring L.

He was back. And he didn't have much time left.

Quickly sitting up he started to shake the sleeping detective.

"Wake up Ryuzaki! Please wake up! My family's in danger! L get up!...LAWLIET GET YOUR SUGARY ASS UP RIGHT NOW!!"

That woke L up.

"Wh-what is it Raito-kun?? Why are you shaking me…and why…"

Before L could ask anymore questions Raito was already out of bed and heading for the door.

"Where are you going?! Raito-kun-"

Raito quickly turned around and exclaimed.

"We have to go now L! My family's about to be tortured in about half an hour! We need to get to my house imminently!"

L had yet to get out of bed; he just kind of stared at Raito with a quizzed look on his face.

"I'm sure that you just had a nightmare Raito-kun, it's not that unthinkable given your situation, now why don't we go back to be-"

"No it was not a nightmare! I know my parents and sister are about to be tortured! Just like…just like how I know your real name…L Lawliet."

L had frozen after that, an unreadable expression had over taken his face. After a minute or two of tense silence which had Raito fidgeting, they were taking why to much time, L gave a tense nod.

Raito gave a sigh of relief and started again for the door, but L's voice had him pause.

"Ok Raito-kun…we will go to your home, and we will even bring protection just incase we are in danger…but the moment we get back…we are going to sit down and you are going to tell me what you know and **how** you know it, is that clear Yagami-kun."

It wasn't a question but then neither of them expected it to be, Raito knew he would of have to sooner or later give L an explanation of his knowledge…he just wished that he didn't have to tell L in this kind of circumstance.

"Of course…L."

With that being said they both left the room, one in nervous anticipation over the safety of his family and his upcoming talk with the man who he cared for but somewhat feared, the other is confused but also determination to get his answers to his questions...no matter the cost.

--

OK…now how was that for predictability? Hahaha I bet none of you saw this coming now did you? Well…nether did I 0.o

Aw Ryuk was so mean! I just felt like torturing someone at the moment…poor Yagami family…will Raito and L make it in time?? Your guess is as good as mine…

Heh sorry that this took so long…real life intruded, also…I had no ideas to what was going to happen, TT.TT my idle hands had left me…But they have possessed me yet again, if this chapter is anything to go by :P

The big explanation will be in the next chapter, maybe…at the end or something…it depends on how long it will take to rescue the Yagami family from the poor guy who is being kind of forced to torture a nice family then commit suicide…wow I must being feeling very angsty right now O.O

Awww who likes the panda bear named Ryu? Heheh I thought it would be a very cute coincidence, tehehe aww toddler Raito was soo cute!!

Anyway my updates might just be spaced out a little more, school is taking up a lot more of my time now so…

PLEASE REVIEW!! TELL ME WHAT YOU THINK! PLEASE I WANT TO GET MY REVIEW COUNT UP TO 80 BEFORE I POST MY NEXT CHAPTER!!

So for anyone who wants to know what happens next…you all better click on the purple button right now!!

Also if I get over the 80 mark…my next chapter will be out even sooner and it will be longer! Also it would make me extremely happy! XDDDDDDDDD

And maybe…just maybe…some more sexual tension between our favorite boys ;-) and also…maybe some…mild lime? Heheh you all better review!


	10. Chapter 10

Warnings: Violence, angst, humor, hurt-Raito…

Mid-terms are this week and next so I've been trying to study (trying is the key word) anyway I finally stopped torturing myself and you guys and started to type out my chapter. I didn't get all the stuff I wanted in here but…well hopefully all the things that I wanted to happen in this chapter will happen in the next.

Thank you all so much for reviewing! Here are my responses now:

Vanity, - heheh I loved the panda named Ryu too! The name was intentionally a shorted version of Ryuzaki. I was going to call it Law…but…I liked Ryu better :) hehehe no Kira is not back, it's just some poor innocent soul that I made up that Ryuk is forcing to torture Raito's family…poor little insignificant oc T.T I really like how that chapter turned out, the way that Raito just really just thought of his family and what he was doing wrong and how he would change it…it gave my character depth!! YEA!!does a happy dance hehe your welcome for me not stopping half way, truthfully it would have been a great cliff-hanger but…I already had promised myself that Raito would be back in his human body by the end of that chapter…besides…I bet you all of you really would have killed me! X.x

Chibi Tsuki Hikari, - hahahaahahahahaah I should have had Raito do that! (whacking Ryuk with a rolled up newspaper) heheeheheh oh that's really good! Yes the little panda bear named Ryu was so cute…hehe it **was** a sign! YES L is Raito's Seme and it will always be so!! But…they may just switch it up every once in awhile for funs sake XDD heheh yes though Ryuzaki has owned Raito since he was a child…Ryu really was Raito's one true friend(guess which Ryu I'm talking about);P

G-Wing Gurl, - Yes the last chapter was quite dramatic huh, hehe Raito might not notice the similarities now…but maybe he will later…or someone else will see it first…hehee D

MiaoShou, - I know I already sent you a replay to your review but…squeals I just had to give a shout out on how happy I am that you read my story! Mine! The Great MiaoShou read my story!!squeals again You are my idol! Yea!! cries tears of happiness now I can die in peace…but not before I finish this story XP I'm so happy you keep reviewing and reading my story! (hyperventilates in a paper bag) I'm just so pleased you find my story interesting! (tears of happiness) Thank you so much for the reviews and I hope you continue them XD and yes Raito does have quite the potty mouth on him! Ryuzaki should fill it with soap…or something else to shut Raito up! /o/ (dirty thought)

Detective1412,- heeh I love cliffies…well only when I write them XP I can't wait to see what your working on!! YEA make as much as you want, just make sure to send me the info on them when you're done, so I can see them! I will continue to strive to make my readers happy XD

Pouf, - Yea I'm glad you think it EXCELLENT! Heheh, yes I need to have Raito try to explain to L how he knows his name, I've kind of been avoiding it lately. ;.; sorry. But it was because I didn't know exactly what I wanted to happen. I NOW know though so expect to be surprised!!(Hopefully) yea I know my story does seem to be flowing a lot better now huh? I think that's because of all of you guys! You give me the motivation to strive to make my story worthy enough for readers like you. **HUGS ALL OF THE WONDERFUL PEOPLE WHO READ HER STORY AND REVIEWS **hehehe bye-bye! :D

Pink Feline, - naw where would the fun be in that? I won't make Raito tell everything to L so soon in the story…just a teaser really. 0.o wow that just sounded dirty. (oh no! I've been infected with Raito's mind dirtiness!) heheeheheeh don't worry Raito will give a plausible explanation on how he know what he knows without giving up to much information…or as plausible as I want it to be. XP

Yoshiluvr, - hey I already got my hit reviews to 91 in only a few days! As soon as I saw that I wanted to start this chapter right away but...ok I drifted for a few days more but…Mid-terms! Wow two computers? Lucky ;;

Kristina, - I'm glad you find my story interesting and hope you continue to enjoy it as much as I enjoy writing it.

Kyorose, - I also liked the cute flashback scene, hehe I always thought he was really protective of his little sister and so I kind of felt in a good mood to write a cute scene about when Sayu came home from the hospital and Raito's first experience of her. Hehe then I got mean and got Ryuk to do something naughty XD

Dotti55, - hehe glad you loved it! Yes the panda named Ryu was cute!! I'm trying to update as quickly as I can without losing plot and length…hold on to the pocky! (I'm already out ;p)

Jess, - heh don't fall off now! XP I'm glad you like the flashback scene it was a pleasure to write. Hope u continue to enjoy it and here's the next chapter :)

Dark Oracle, - I know! Cute little Raito with his little panda named Ryu…hehe it's an Aww moment in the making. Yes! Apples are for Ryuk as crack is for humans ;p Ah the lime, I tried to add that in this chapter but it seems that it wanted to wait till the next one to have any type of action between our boys ;; sorry. I'll defiantly be putting lime right in the beginning of the next chapter! XD

Black-Dranzer-1119, - I'm glad my story is cool XD I loved the aww moment when little Raito had given his panda to his little sister, he now has a big panda to play with now though XDD

Dolphin-Fly, - hehe I'll take the sugar and cake but…I promised my counselor that I wouldn't take any more souls from strangers ;; heheh Feel free to draw who ever you like. I love my Little Mother character and enjoyed creating her immensely. If you ever do draw her feel free to share :-) yes Ryuk is an ass, but he gets what's coming to him this chapter XD

Keelia, - I'm so happy your enjoying my fanfic ;) I trying not to rush the relationship between the two but…does 10 chapters seem like enough time? Even though they only really started to talk around chapter 6 or so? O.0 oh well, heheh

Anna, - Yes I was also wondering how I would introduced that to, p but I came up with that idea and I like it even though it was kind of sadistic XP oh well, you enjoyed it and I enjoyed it so two positives make a big fat POSITIVE! XDDD

(Person without a name), - Yes Raito is a bored, bored child. He should also realize that he isn't the only one who could be bored in life hehe, I also like it when Raito's hair got longish in the time when he was in the cell in the manga/anime. I like it so much I had to gave his shinigami form long hair (it makes him so prettyful XD)

Thexamimi, - Hi mimi! I'm glad you're reading my story! Aww why did you skip over the lengthy paragraphs? That was mostly L's little story about his childhood traumatic experience! Anyway I know that there are many _many_ mistakes in my story. I plan on going over this entire story after I'm done and editing it. But not until I'm done with it completely, you need to remember or you may not know that this is almost a first for me (I'm not really counting my other fics because I didn't really try with those ones) so it's bound not to be perfect. Anyway thank you for looking it over and saying that my story has great potential. :D

Lady Vampyre Nefertiri, - hehe ok, ok I updated happy? XDDD I expect to see more of those reviews you said you'd do if it would help…well help? Heheheh enjoy ;D

Blood-fire-dragon, - told you didn't I? XD this story is good!! (I'm bragging I know but after 90 or so reviews of people praising this story I have a right to it ;p) here's the next chapter from your horrid-story-making-fiend XD

Hope everyone enjoys this chapter! Stay tuned for the next chapter soon…hopefully 8-0

--

'I hope we're not too late.'

That was the only thought which raced through Raito's mind as both L and him ran through the headquarters towards the exist door, but before they left L quickly detoured to an unmarked door and ran inside closing the door when Raito made to follow him. Before Raito could open the door up and follow L inside and demand what L thought he was doing, L had already ran back out and was heading for the exist. Raito paused in confusion for maybe 3 seconds before he started running again.

L had run into the parking lot that housed all of the cars. He then quickly jumped into the driver's seat of a black BMW, car keys out and already in the process of turning on the car. Raito didn't waste a second and also got in the front seat next to L.

Almost before he closed the side door L had already started to tear out of the building. He started to drive wildly in the direction of the Yagami household.

Raito now that he wasn't moving or had anything to do at the moment suddenly realized that his head felt like it was going to explode. He only just then remembered that L had given him a slight concussion when he knocked him out earlier. It felt like all that had happened to them in that white room happened a life time ago.

Raito hunched forward slightly and put his head in his hands. A low moan of pain escaped him before he could stop it.

"Are you ok Raito-kun?"

Raito winched as he turned his head a little to look at L who was driving and giving him periodic looks of worry.

"I'm ok Ryuzaki…I just started to feel the after effects to the…_punch_ you dealt me."

Raito made sure to empathized punch so that Ryuzaki will know that he did **not** want to hear that a _slap_ had knocked him out.

"Oh, right…ummm there should be some Advil or something like that in the glove compartment if you need some…"

'Is L? Yes he is…he's blushing. How adorable, heh he seems to feel embarrassed by what he did to me, or is it that he's blushing because what _caused_ him to sla-punch me?'

Raito decided he would think about it later on when he wasn't in such a panic about his family. He quickly shook out about 3 Advil out of its bottle and dried swallowed them.

With L driving as he was they should make it to the Yagami household in about 5 minutes max. While this greatly please Raito…he kind of felt fear for his life with the way that L cut corners and popped wheelies on two wheels more often then not, even though he was virtually immortal.

Absentmindly he wondered where L had learned to drive a car.

L started to take a really sharp corner and almost ran over an older couple who where crossing the road. L had had to swerve quickly to the right to avoid them.

He hadn't once touched the brake.

That made him also wonder and he quickly clenched a rising ball of panic in his gut, if L ever _had_ learned to driven before.

Thankfully L started to talk; it helped settle Raito down enough to not concentrate on his sudden fear of dying in a fiery death of shrapnel and car parts. Not that he would die, but he imagined it would still hurt like hell.

"Raito-kun…what should I expect to see and prepare for?"

Raito thought about it for a second, what should he tell L?

'Well, it can't hurt to tell him the truth…at least about this; I just have to be very careful on how I word it.'

"Well, around 9 o'clock tonight a man will break into my home and then proceed to torment my family till near death…look L, I promise you I will explain to you on how I know this and your name but, right now isn't the time. Just be careful this guy, let's just say that he's mentally unstable and leave it at that."

L just gave a slightly disbelieving look but thankfully dropped it…at least for now.

After another minute or so they pulled right up to the gate of the Yagami household.

Without looking at the small clock on the car dashboard to see if he had made it on time or not Raito ripped the car door opened and tore through the small distance to the door to his house. He almost tried to walk through it like he did when he was a shinigami but caught himself in time before he made a fool of himself in front of L.

It wouldn't speak well of his mental health to L if he just started to slam into doors and walls like he believed he could walk through them.

Trying the door he found it to be locked, he gave a sigh of frustration and happiness. Frustration because a locked door was keeping him away from his family right now, happiness because if it was locked…that meant that they made it in time.

L who was getting very impatient but had decided to remain quite was standing a few feet behind him…and got quite a view when Raito bent down to get the spare key from under the plotted plant next to the door.

Raito ignored the small keening he heard from L, figuring that it was just L being his usual weird self and was hungry for cake…he wouldn't have thought that if he turned around and saw just where L's eyes were trailed on.

But he didn't turn around so L was at the moment safe from Raito's wrath if he had caught L staring at his ass.

Unlocking the door Raito swung it open and without pause raced up the stairs to his room. L having no idea what to do at this point just followed.

Raito came to a stop right outside his door and listened, after not hearing anything he slowly opened the door being very careful, it would just be his luck if he had been late and...well he didn't want to think about it.

Raito couldn't stop the sigh of relief from escaping his lips as he saw that his family was still in the position he had left them less then an hour ago.

Still sleeping peacefully on his bed.

L had hurriedly walked into the room right after Raito and was also staring at the peaceful family that was cuddling on his suspect's former bed.

"If Raito-kun had just wanted to guilt trip me from separating him from his family…well it worked superbly."

Raito just shot L an annoyed look and shook his head, he then whispered back.

"No Ryuzaki I did not take you here only to try to guilt trip you, geez, no what I said will happen really will happen…it just hasn't happen yet, not that I will let it happen."

Raito didn't know what his expression showed when he said that last part but whatever it looked like caused L to look faintly alarmed.

"Rai-"

Before L could even finish what he was about to say a sudden noise caused them both to tense up.

They both turned around to look at what made the noise and were surprised and shocked to see the equally surprised and shocked face of Yagami Sayu staring at them from her position on Raito's bed. Her eyes had widened and her mouth was opened in a silent gasp of shock. Finally she closed it, but her eyes only seemed to get bigger as she stared at the still form of L, who at the moment seemed to be feeling very uncomfortable with the gawking preteen staring at him like he was some kind of alien life-form.

What happened next was something no one could have predicted.

"Oh my god! It's Ryu-chan come to Life!!"

The stares that occupied this statement where totally and completely blank.

--

Sayu's squeal of excitement had apparently woken up both of Raito's parents. After an awkward silence insured for about a few seconds Yagami-san deemed it necessary to ask the obvious.

"Raito…why are you here and with Ryuzaki-san? Did something happen-"

Before he could continue the question that was not doubt burning in both elder Yagami's minds Sayu gave another squeal.

"Oh my…your name is Ryuzaki?! Wow you really did come to life!! My wish really did come true!! Now you can protect big brother!!"

Everyone turned bewildered eyes to the squealing girl who had just thrown herself on Ryuzaki, hugging him in a death grip.

Raito was the first one to recover over the shock everyone had fallen into after that. He quickly moved over to where his sister was crushing Ryuzaki in a hug. Ryuzaki himself looked highly uncomfortable and was looking at Raito for help.

Raito as gently as he could pried his little sister off the stunned detective. After this was accomplished he asked the question that was now on everyone's mind.

"Sayu what are you going on about? And why did you just attack Ryuzaki?"

Sayu just gave a huff at her brother and tossed her head in what was an obvious sign of the word 'Duh'.

"I did not attack Ryu-chan Raito, I just hugged him."

While Raito was struck speechless with this statement, it also seemed to stun both Ryuzaki and his father; his mother seemed the only one who was not in a semi-catatonic sense of state. She wasn't as shocked as the rest of her family was because she had no idea who Ryuzaki really was. So the idea that her daughter was calling _L_, the world's greatest detective _Ryu-chan_, didn't faze her that much. She just asked the question that was puzzling her.

"Sayu dear, why are you calling this man Ryu-chan? Do you know him or something?"

Sayu had turned away from the amusing sight of seeing her brother and father speechless for once in their lives, add to the point that she had caused it…well it was a great moment for her. She looked at her mother and answered in a calm rational voice.

"Mom can't you see the resemblance? Earlier when we were praying for big brother to come home…I was kind of praying something different. That doesn't mean I don't want big brother to come home but…I knew that whatever he was doing was important to him and he wouldn't be home till whatever he was doing was done and done in such as way that was only satisfactory to him. Instead of praying for him to come home soon, I was praying that Ryu-chan would protect Raito. Raito once told me that the only person he could trust with his life would be his best friend Ryu. I know Ryu is only a stuffed animal and all but…I knew that if anyone could truly be trusted with my big brother it would be the one that big brother trusted first. So…I prayed that Ryu would come to life and protect Raito…and it came true! Look at him mom, he looks just like Ryu-chan, one he has the panda eyes, two he's scruffy just like Ryu-chan and three…well he came with Raito and Raito seems quite comfortable in his presence. That proves that he's Ryu-chan!"

Sayu held out the old worn panda teddy bear as if to show her proof. Not fazed at all that she was holding said Ryu-chan while also saying that Ryuzaki was Ryu-chan. Sayu's logic only made sense to Sayu it seemed.

Even Raito's mother was speechless at the end of this.

Finally Raito decided to set his sister straight on this Ryu-chan coming to life and protecting him business. He could tell by the way Ryuzaki was staring at him that he would also have to explain this later, and by Ryuzaki's expression it seemed this was just as important as his explanation on how he knew L's true name.

'Oh joy, my life can't get any shitter."

Raito really needed to learn not to think stuff like that because just as he did his bedside alarm clock gave off a slightly louder tick then it's usual ones. Looking at it he froze.

9 o'clock.

'Fuck!'

--

Raito quickly turned his head away from the clock; it seemed that his sudden change in demeanor hadn't gone unnoticed because both his father and Ryuzaki were now wearing tense expressions while looking at him, his mother and sister just looked confused at this sudden change in atmosphere.

Not wanting to alarm them but needing to get them somewhere safe for now while he dealt with the attacker, Raito thought of a simple way of doing this.

Order them without giving them time to argue.

"Dad you have to get mom and Sayu and yourself into that small hideaway in your closet right now, don't come out of it no matter what you hear till either I or Ryuzaki come and get you. Also get your pistol from your bedside table and take it with you, make sure it's loaded. Make sure to be really quite and to not attract any attention to yourselves whatsoever, Move now!"

His mother and sister where already acting on his commanding tone, his father only paused for a second to look at his son's face in uncertainty, but also choose to obey.

When Raito spoke that way to his family they knew not to question it, especially if it involved them. Raito only used that voice with his family when he was afraid.

_Afraid for them._

Raito only ever used that tone once before with them. It had been when Sayu had almost drowned in the tub when she had been six, Raito had had to give her CPR and used the _tone_ with his mother to calm her down enough for her to call the ambulance and to get blankets and stuff. He had taken control of the situation to save his sisters life and his family knew that.

Raito gave a small sigh of relief when his family left the room and quietly went to his parent's room. After hearing the door close to that room he almost sagged in relief, but not yet.

No, by now the person who was being controlled by Ryuk's Deathnote would have gotten in the house.

Looking around him for something to defend himself with he jumped when a hand shot out of nowhere and handed him a wooden bat. He looked up at Ryuzaki who wore a grim expression. It seemed that Ryuzaki just really realized that Raito had been serious.

Truthfully Raito had almost forgotten L was even there. He chilled himself for losing sight of his surroundings and gave a nod of thanks to L while taking the bat from him. L just nodded back.

Raito looked down at the bat and remembered it was an old birthday present from his father on his eleventh birthday. He had of course shown gratitude but truthfully he had never used it. He had no use for sports except tennis and that hadn't even lasted long. No his studies had been a much more focus point at that time. Still he was glad he hadn't thrown it away, it would come in handy right now that was for sure. He hadn't forgotten that the would-be-torturer would have a large kitchen knife with him when he came up the stairs expecting a slumbering family.

Raito felt a slightly malicious smirk cross his face at the thought that the criminal wouldn't be expecting _them_ that was for sure.

"Raito-kun needs to stop smiling like that if he doesn't want me to believe that he's thinking about committing murder instead of self-defense."

Raito's smirk froze on his face for a second before vanishing completely. Yet again he had forgotten that L was also here, either that or he was just getting to comfortable with him for his own good.

'Not good, not good at all. Damn I need to concentrate right now. Everything else will have to wait. Malicious thoughts included.'

Raito turned to face L with an innocent expression plastered to his face.

"I don't know what you mean Ryuzaki, but I do know that we don't have time for this, the man who was going to hurt my family will be entering this room any minute now, he will also be armed with a knife so we need to prepare. I'll hide behind the door and you can crouch down on the other side of the bed out of sight. After we get his subdued we will have to call the cops and get Watari here to get you out of here before anyone else could see your face."

Ryuzaki just nodded his head in agreement but his expression showed that Raito's earlier attempt at looking innocent had not been believed at all. When L had not moved for a few more seconds Raito got annoyed.

"Ok I promise I won't kill him, now can we get moving?" Raito's face showed his displeasure at this promise but nothing else.

L nodded his head again but more firmly this time, he also moved to the other side of the bed like Raito had asked him to. It was only then that Raito noticed that L had no weapon to defend himself with.

'Well that's stupid but we don't have time to find him something, I'll just have to make sure that Temino doesn't get near him enough to hurt him. I hope that Ryuzaki's martial art will be enough to keep that psycho away from him till I get the chance to bash him in the head, only enough to knock him unconscious unfortunately. I was hoping to avoid having this guy die from a heart attack, which he will have when he can't fulfill what the deathnote set him out to do. Oh well, I'll just have to deal and improvise my story when this is all over.'

Raito hurried himself quickly to the small space that would have to hide him from the attacker when he opened the door, Raito position the bat in his hands, making sure he had a good grip on it so that it wouldn't slip out of his hands nor injure himself when he was taking a swing, he let it face downward to that it would also fit in the small space.

A few seconds passed without anything happening, Raito looked over to where he guessed L was hiding but he couldn't see him. Which was good Raito guessed, if he couldn't see him that would mean that the attacker wouldn't either.

Sweat was dripping down Raito's forehead and even though he really wanted to wipe away the disgusting stuff he couldn't afford to move a muscle. His breathing was becoming erratic and his vision was slightly tunneling.

Raito realized something at this point, something that he had been avoiding in thinking about before when he had just been concentrating on getting to his family in time. He felt fear; it had no real rationality to it, no baseline for it either, it was unexplainable to him why he would fear this man.

And then it came to him, it wasn't the man he feared, no it was the situation. Even if-when he stopped this from happening what was to say that Ryuk wouldn't pull something like this again right after? And that time Raito might not get an early warning like he did this time. That's what he feared, he may have stopped Ryuk from killing his family with the Deathnote, but that didn't stop anything else that Ryuk could do to them.

'Looks like I'm back to buying more apples again for that freak. Fuck!'

Raito could just hear that damned shinigami laughing right now as if he could read his thoughts. It took Raito a second or two to realize that he could _really_ hear him and that he wasn't imagining it.

Raito looked to the other side of his room and bit back a yell of frustration, there was Ryuk, just floating around and watching the scene with an amused expression on his face. It light up when he noticed that Raito had noticed him, Ryuk actually had the _nerve_ to wave to him in a mocking salute.

'Oh that's it, no matter what I'm going to find a way to kill that son-of-a-bitch.'

Raito didn't even acknowledge him back expect for the narrowing of his eyes.

Ryuk just laughed again and then proceed to get into a more comfortable floating spot. Like he was just going to sit back and watch the interesting scene in front of him like a housewife does with her soaps.

'_I'm truly going to kill him.'_

Raito didn't waste anymore thought about the apple-freak-of-a-shinigami when he heard the stairs start to faintly creak under pressure.

Feeling himself tense up Raito tried to calm down, it wouldn't do anyone any good if he pulled a muscle or something like that. He once again looked in the direction of where L should have been hiding but he still couldn't see him.

Raito closed his eyes for a second to try to find some inner strength to help calm him down some, it helped that he knew that L was in the room to and would help him, it also helped that he himself knew some martial arts and he had a sturdy wooden bat to smash with.

Still his head hurt like he had gone one on one with an elephant and the elephant won by smashing his head under its feet. His whole body was stiff because of all the fighting that he and Ryuzaki had done earlier to each other. Not to mention that he hadn't had anything whatsoever to eat or drink for almost a full day. Topped with the emotional rollercoaster that he had been riding since waking up from Mu and you have one serious tired and worn out ex-World Ender slash ex-Multi-Mass Murder.

He snapped his eyes back opened when he heard his door slowly creak back open.

This was it.

--

Raito tried to flatten himself even further into the wall behind him, because it seemed that Temino was going to open the door all the way. The room was dark because Raito had the sense to turn off the light before hiding. If Temino saw that the bed was empty before they were ready…well that wouldn't be good for them at all that was for sure.

After hearing Temino step into the room a ways Raito decided it was now or never.

_Never_ hadn't really been a word that Raito liked to associate with himself if he could help it.

With a wordless cry of rage Raito sprung out of his hiding place and swing, it was dark so he couldn't really see well; he only hoped he could end this quickly with a whack to the head.

Unfortunately for Raito's hope the bat missed Temino's head and only clipped him in the shoulder.

Temino turned around with a roar of unspeakable rage. It was then that Raito saw his eyes. What he saw brought all the fear that he had been feeling before to almost overwhelm him.

Dead eyes, they were the eye's of someone who was already dead inside and was just waiting for its body to follow. When Raito had been little he remembered an old American horror film had been playing on TV. His mom said he was too young to see it and had turned it off. Later when he knew his mom was busy somewhere else in the house he had snuck back in to the living room and turned the TV back on to the movie his mom said he wasn't old enough to watch. Raito believed he was old enough for anything at this point.

He had been wrong.

It was called 'Night of the Living Dead' and Raito hated to admit that that movie had scarred him a bit for life. He had nightmares for months after watching it. He logically knew that it wasn't real or anything like that but he couldn't shake off what he saw that scared him so bad.

The zombie's eyes, they had been so dead and dull and full of darkness that it beyond scared 6 year old Raito into sleeping with his little sister and Ryu for 2 months before he could move back into his room. He didn't care that the zombies ate people, by that time he had already read about cannibals and how they ate human flesh, no that didn't scare him at all. It had just been those eyes. Even now he still felt a twinge of something he couldn't identify whenever he saw an Ad for a Zombie movie.

Temino Gin's eyes were the eyes of the zombie. And they scared the hell out of him.

Unlucky enough for Raito while he had frozen at the sight of Temino's eyes, Temino had recovered from the hit to his shoulder and lunged at Raito with the knife.

Raito saw it finally at the last minute and tried to dodge, the knife had also been swung in a wide arch, with Raito dodging it he managed to avoid getting hit in any vital places. Still he got a slight slash across his belly. Biting back a cry of pain Raito brought the bat up again to take another swing, he managed to hit Temino in the knee cap hard enough for Temino to fall down onto the ground, where he stayed howling out in pain.

Raito guessed he had broken the knee.

"Ryuzaki call the poli-"

Before Raito could call out anything else Temino had rolled over and plunged the knife into Raito's leg.

Raito couldn't stop the cry of pain from coming out this time.

Raito couldn't stop his decent to the ground; it was like his leg just couldn't support him anymore. Before he had a chance to get away from the crazed man and get up he was pined down. The bat was yanked from his grip and thrown towards the other side of the room where it proceeded to smash his computer screen into nothing but wires and broken glass.

Temino was now on top of him and holding out the knife towards Raito's face. Raito quickly brought his arms up and griped hold of the descending arm that was clearly hell-bent on carving his face in.

"Ryuzaki where the hell are you?! Some help would be nice!!" Raito managed to call out before only concentrating on keeping that knife away from him. He knew that his Shinigami form healed quickly and without scaring but…how well did his human form heal? Was it just like any other humans? Or did it have the recovery speed of his other form? Raito didn't know these things yet and he didn't really feel up to experimenting right now.

Raito could feel himself weakening from the strain of the other man's strength, while the crazie had been fully healthy and whole, Raito was not in the best shape right now and it was clearly showing.

Just as the knife started to descend he heard a loud banging noise before the weight that was currently on him seemed to double, but the knife had stopped its terrifying descent and just hung limp.

Raito was in shock. What just happened?

He had to close his eyes as the light was suddenly turned on. His eyes had gotten use to the darkness so the sudden brightness of his over head light hurt his eyes somewhat.

He turned his head slightly to look in the direction of where his light switch was and felt his eyes widen.

There was L holding onto a 9 mm pistol which was still giving off a faint smoke trail from where it was fired.

Even though it shocked Raito to see L with a gun on hand, it was Ryuzaki-no _Lawliet's _expression that shocked Raito the most.

**Pure Black Wrath.**

Raito was _very_ happy to see that it was not directed at him but at the limp body that he was currently under.

Raito tried to get out from under the dead body of the late Temino Gin but it seemed that he had really lost all of his strength in fighting off the knife. He couldn't even get the guy to twitch. Ryuzaki was still in the same position, just standing there and trying to set fire to the corpse with his eyes alone.

Raito really didn't want to bother him right now, especially in the mood that L seemed to be in right now, but his stomach and leg were really starting to hurt. Not to mention his vision was seriously blacking in and out. He was determined not to pass out though.

"Umm Ryuzaki? A little help please?"

Ryuzaki seemed to snap out of whatever black rage he had fallen into when Raito's voice pierced the air. He quickly clipped the safety back on the gun and stuck it into a gun-hoist that was under the back of his shirt. After that he quickly moved over to the still grounded Raito and helped heave the corpse off of him. It wasn't quite as easy as either of them hoped. Temino Gin was a heavy set man who seemed to have worked out some in life.

After a few minutes of pulling and pushing, which had Raito trying to bit back grunts of pain whenever either of his wounds where pulled or touched, they finally got him off of Raito and laying on the ground on Raito's floor face-up. Raito looked at the deceased form of Temino and at the gunshot wound. It seemed that L had gotten a heart shot.

'Heh, I wonder if that can count as a _heart attack_?'

Raito shook his head as he realized he was starting to get a bit delusional.

Raito looked up into the worried eyes of Ryuzaki.

"Raito-kun I will call the police in a moment and fetch your family, I believe they should all go downstairs and I will also inform your father as to what happened. I'm sure they are all frantic by now. I do not wish to but you will also be going to the hospital to get checked on. Those wounds don't look to serious but I won't take any chances. Do you need anything before I proceed?"

It took Raito a moment to sort out all that Ryuzaki just said; when he finally did he looked up at Ryuzaki from his place on the floor and shook his head.

"No Ryuzaki I don't believe I need anything, like you said the wounds aren't too serious they just hurt like hell. I don't think it would be wise for me to go to the hospital-no don't argue just hear me out, like I said the wounds aren't serious we could just have Watari patch me up. I just-I want to go back home please."

Ryuzaki looked awestruck for a moment. He then wiped his entire expression into its usual expressionless mask, but Raito could still see the worry in his eyes.

Finally after another minute of silence as Ryuzaki thought it over he finally hesitantly nodded his head in consent.

"Ok Raito-kun…if that is what you think is wise. I also do agree that it would probably be the best course of action right now under this type of circumstance. I will now go fetch your family and bring them downstairs; I will also close this door some so your mother and sister won't see this mess…do you also wish to be brought downstairs?"

Again Raito shook his head no. This time giving no explanation, he just tiredly sat up and started to check on his injures.

Raito could feel Ryuzaki stare hard at him for a few more seconds before he left the room.

Raito gave a sigh of relief before the crackling manic laughter brought him back to the reason _why_ he had opt to stay in the room with a dead body.

"Hukukukukuukukukukuk that was great!! I've hadn't had this much fun since I first gave you the Deathnote, oh man was that priceless! Well worth the loss of one apple…"

Raito paused as he heard that.

"Ryuk you mean to tell me that…that you deliberately provoked me earlier? So that I would smash the apple therefore giving you a reason for all of this madness?"

If that was so…then Raito might just need to evaluate his assumption of Ryuk being an idiot.

"Huh? Oh not really…why would I need a reason to do this? I'm just saying…I'm no longer pissed at you about the apple. This was too much fun! You still owe me another one though."

Never mind. Raito's first assumption of Ryuk held. He was a total idiot.

"Yea well…fine, ok you want apples? You stay the hell away from my family and anyone else I say and I'll make sure you get your god-damned apples."

"Yes! Sure thing Raito, I'll stay clear from your family, though I'm not sure why you suddenly care for them now. Wasn't it you that told me that you might even had to kill your own family if it came down to it? What changed? Also how do you have a shinigami form when you are also a human? No body can have two forms like you do expect the higher gods...Oh fudge-on-a-dog! You're a god now aren't you?! How the hell did that happen??"

Raito felt like laughing at Ryuk's suddenly frighten expression. It seemed even Ryuk knew not to mess with gods, and while Raito knew that he himself wasn't quite a god…why shouldn't he use this sudden fear of Ryuk's to his advantage?

"Yes Ryuk, I am a god now I will not bother trying to explain the reason why I am what I am now to someone who is as simple minded as you…just know this, don't you dare piss me off like you just did right now. I'm feeling generous enough to still consider feeding you apples, if you dare to even think about doing something like this again…well let's just say that it wouldn't be pretty. Do you know that there are certain viruses and chemistry theories that could destroy a single type of fruit or vegetable forever? It wouldn't be that hard for me to create one and wipe out every single apple on the face of this earth, and I will make sure that they will never be re-grown ever again if you anger me again. Do we have an understanding now Ryuk?"

The expression that Ryuk now wore can only be described as pure unadulterated terror.

"Y-yes Raito I-I'll just be g-going back to t-the shinigami realm. C-call me if y-you need m-me."

With that Ryuk flew out of there like a bat out of hell.

Raito was kind of surprised that that threat had worked so well. He knew that Ryuk thinking of him as some type of god had installed some fear in the apple-freak shinigami but it seemed the threat to the apples had truly installed horror in him enough so that he would obey Raito from now on.

'Huh, I guess that went well.'

With that thought Raito again started to feel faint. He looked at his wound on his leg which was still bleeding sluggishly, the wound on his belly was no longer bleeding but it hurt like hell to even move.

Raito started to hear faint sirens off in the distance. It seemed the police were now coming, that meant that L had called them. Which also meant what?

'Right, Watari should be here soon to pick both L and myself up. I wonder what L told dad to tell the cops. Most likely that dad heard someone break and had rushed his family to hide while he dealt with the attacker, hmmm I guess it could work if L gave my father his gun and pulled some strings later to get rid of any evidence that we were ever here this night.'

Before Raito had a chance to ponder anymore Ryuzaki had back and told him that Watari was waiting downstairs for them to leave, they also had to hurry somewhat the cops would be there in approximately 18.5 minutes.

Raito rolled his eyes as he heard L rant off numbers; he could swear L just pulled out of thin air or most likely his ass.

Giving a faint snort of amusement he allowed L to help him to his feet and half-carry him downstairs. Still that seemed almost too much for Raito because both his wounds started to bleed again. He tried not to call attention to them but something in his body language must have alerted L to his distress. Either that or L suddenly got a case of empathic abilities.

"Are you ok Raito-kun? Would you like me to carry you the rest of the way?"

Raito just gave him a look that said 'Are you freaking kidding me?'

Unfortunately for Raito took the silence as a sign of consent or something because the next thing Raito knew he was suddenly lifted up into L's arms.

_Bridal style._

'Oh hell no!'

"Ryuzaki put me down right now!"

Ryuzaki didn't even look at him as he continued down the stairs towards the living room where Raito's entire family was in.

"Raito-kun is injured and it wouldn't be right of me as Raito-kun's friend if I let him suffer now would it?"

Raito could practically feel the self-smugness that was pouring out of Ryuzaki right now. That seriously pissed Raito off. Where did L get the idea that it was ok to do this to him? And not only was it humiliating to be carried this way by L like he was helpless…it was also quite embarrassingly arousing as well.

Raito tried to stop the blush that was threatening to over take his face. That sadly wasn't the only thing he had to stop from rising though.

'Come on Raito get a hold of yourself! How could you get an erection with being humiliated like this? I-I can't be that submissive?! I mean yes it's kind of hot when L takes control like this and I have to admit I got kind of stiff when I saw him standing there earlier with the gun in his hand and the serious expression on his face was sexy…geez I think I need some time to rethink my sexual preferences sometime soon if I'm getting these kind of thoughts.'

Raito had to stop thinking about all of that when Ryuzaki walked towards the doorway into the living room. He had a frantic family to console. Raito whispered to L quickly before they got into the room where everyone was.

"Ryuzaki put me down for now please, I don't really want my family freaking out seeing me injured enough to have to be carried around."

But L just shook his head and whispered back.

"You are bleeding again Raito-kun, not only would you not be able to stand up you are also covered in blood right now. If I were to try to stand you up right now your whole family would see all the blood on you. At least this way I can kind of shield them from the full view of it."

Raito was kind of ashamed he hadn't thought of that himself. So he just flushed again and nodded his consent.

Ryuzaki nodded back and then walked the rest of the way into the living room.

--

After the small yelling and crying session that had insured after Raito's family had first caught sign of him, everyone was now somewhat calm down when Ryuzaki had made sure to inform them that Raito's injures were not fatal and that he was going to go take care of Raito right now. Raito's mom was upset when she heard that her son was not going to be going to a hospital and tried to her best to get them to change their minds. But when Raito's father had started agree with them she finally stopped trying and just held onto Sayu in a loose hug.

Raito gave his family an edited version on what just happened because he knew that L had already given his father the full version. So he edited it for his mother's and sister's sake. They didn't need to know all the gruesome details anyway. It would only have unsettled them more.

When Raito and L and Watari made to finally go because the cops where going to be there any minute now, Sayu ran up to Raito who was still being carried in Ryuzaki's arms. It kind of made Raito wonder if he wasn't getting tired yet.

"Raito? I have something I want to give you."

Raito looked at his little sister, she was so strong. Even though he could tell that what just happened had scared her she didn't let it show expected for a few tear lines that were drying on her face.

"What is it Sayu?"

Sayu looked down for a moment and then looked up with determination.

"I know now that you have Ryu-chan in human form to help you so you probably don't really need this…but I want you to have it not for protection or anything but…as a way to remember me by."

With that said she held out the worn panda bear that Raito had given her so long ago.

Raito was speechless yet again. He just reached out carefully and gently took a hold of it and looked at his old teddy bear.

He couldn't stop the small smile from forming on his face.

He looked back at Sayu as she looked back at him. As if in unspoken agreement both of them broke out in huge smiles and giggles.

"Thank you little sister, I promise the moment I get down with the what I'm doing right now you and me are going to Spaceland or something. Maybe even Disneyland in America if I'm in a good enough in the money department."

"Yeah that would be great! Go patch yourself up big brother and do what you love to do…solve cases. Kira won't stand a chance with you on the job."

At everyone's shocked expressions Sayu just rolled her eyes upward.

"Oh come on guys you really didn't think I wouldn't figure it out? Of course your on the Kira case big brother, you would only be this obsessed with something if it was worth your time, and I know how much Kira pisses you off, so duh of course your trying to catch Kira, and I hope you catch that son-of-a-pig soon because he is also starting to piss me off to. If anyone could get him it would be you Raito."

Raito almost felt that he could start crying. His sister was a lot smarter then people gave her credit for; it was just that everyone compared her to him so they all thought just because he was smarter that made her dumb. Not so, Sayu was only about a dozen or so I.Q. points lower from his, and his being around 200 or so that was saying something. He couldn't help but be really proud of her.

He wanted to ask about the law books he saw in her room but knew that now was not the time, soon though he would have a talk with his little sister to see what she was up to.

Again before they were able to leave Sayu stopped them again. But this time it was Ryuzaki she was addressing instead of her brother.

Sayu stared at Ryuzaki again, clearly making Ryuzaki uncomfortable once more.

Finally Sayu spoke.

"You'd better take really good care of Raito Ryu-chan, he might not seem it with his holier-then-thou attitude but my brother is actually very fragile. Don't play with his heart or you will be very sorry you ever meet me. Also…Raito is injured right now so I better not hear about you molesting my brother till he's all better ok?"

Dead Silence.

"What!? Sayu what the hell are you say-"

Raito was cut off as Ryuzaki said in a dead serious voice.

"I promise to obey my future sister-in-law's words."

Now Raito's voice had entered new levels of shrillness.

"W-what the hell are you saying Ryuzaki! Will you stop messing around with Sayu; we have to get out of here before the cops come! Good god I'm freaking surrounded by idiots-"

Before Raito could say anymore Ryuzaki finally took his leave from Raito's family home. Raito decided to just drop the subject altogether, his face wouldn't survive the blush that was threatening it if the conversation was continued.

Raito saw that only the black BMW that they had come in was outside, it made Raito wonder how Watari had gotten there in the first place.

Ryuzaki as gently as he could sat Raito down inside the car, he then proceed to climb in the back with him. Most likely to make sure Raito didn't slide to the floor or something like that.

Watari got inside the driver's seat and started to pull away from the crime scene that was Raito's house.

Ryuzaki surprised Raito yet again. Raito had been leaning on the car door on the opposite side of Ryuzaki when a soft pair of hands gently pulled him down until his head was once again laying in Ryuzaki's lap, he didn't protest mostly because he was to tired and hurt to really care one way or another. He was facing upward so he could see all of Ryuzaki's face.

At the moment though Ryuzaki wasn't looking at him, instead he was talking to Watari.

"Watari could you please roll-down the special glass? I'll inform you when I'm done."

Without saying anything or looking back Watari just nodded his head slightly and pushed a button that seemed to be almost invisible till you pressed it.

Raito was shocked to see a sound-proof piece of glass fold out from the top of the roof somehow and curve in a way glass was not suppose to, well only if it was super heated but Raito knew that this glass would be cool to the touch. It slid all the way down till it touched the ground.

Watari would not be able to hear a word that they were saying now or see them at all for that matter.

'Well this can't be good.'

"You don't have to worry too much Raito-kun, I figured that we could have that conversation now, Watari will circle the area for a while till I tap a code on the glass to signal that we should get back to headquarters. I know that your wounds need to be taken care of but we can't stale anymore, when we are all done I'll make sure all of your wounds are taken care of and that you get plenty of food and rest for the next day or two. So Raito-kun…how do you know my real name is L Lawliet and how did you know that your family was in danger tonight?"

Now Raito felt very uncomfortable and he was still in a lot of pain, unable to come up with a nice plausible believable excuse. He was also somewhat surprised. Even though L knew that Raito knew that Lawliet was his real name he had never actually acknowledge the fact that his name was Lawliet.

Raito knew that it was now or never, the time to talk. He himself actually had a few questions for Ryuzaki that he wanted answered. So he took a deep breath and tightened his grip on his panda Ryu who he was now unconsciously cuddling.

"Ok…Lawliet, the truth is…I learned your name from a dream."

If L had eyebrows they would have risen in disbelief, luckily his eyes at the moment were readable enough.

"I'm not kidding L I'm serious, after I had that panic induced attack in my cell and passed out I started to have this amazing vivid dream. I was in complete and utter darkness…and I felt fear, mind numbing shaking fear. I felt like something was coming after me, something monstrous and something so utterly evil that I was afraid for my soul. I turned around at last and what I saw…well I saw you Lawliet. I couldn't believe it in my dream, how could such evil dark energy be coming from you? And that's when I saw it, it was behind you. Trying to hide itself in your shadow, trying to merge with your shadow. It was a pure blackness itself, after it saw that I could now see it…i-it started to torture you, doing horrible things, things that I never want to see happen again, not while I still draw breath. I-I tried to run towards you, I didn't know what I could do-do to save you but I knew that I had to at least try."

By this point Raito was faintly sobbing. Not enough to stop him from talking but enough for him to stumble now and again when he couldn't take it anymore. It wasn't a show either, what he had seen in that dream…it had truly scared him, not just for himself but for Ryuzaki…who he now knew as Zaki his Lifenote partner. Still, seeing that happen and not being able to do anything about it…well it had almost been enough for him to want to cry at the time. Now that he was retelling it he just let those tears he had been holding back spill forth.

The Little Mother had told him that he needed to show his true self to his intended and he knew that she didn't just mean his physically shinigami appearance either. No he had to show Lawliet everything about himself. Not holding himself back at all, and if that meant that L got to see him in a fragile state then so be it.

"I couldn't move at all, it was like I was paralyzed in place. Unable to do anything but watch…it was horrible. The worse kind of torture you could imagine. To have to watch as someone you c-care about was being h-hurt right in front of you and you are powerless to s-stop it."

The sobbing was picking up some; Raito had to hurry through before he became unable to talk.

"I was able to distract it though, it may have p-paralyzed my body but it did nothing to my voice. I insulted it crudely enough so it lost interest in you and moved on to me. At the same t-time I became aware that I could now move. You had fallen onto the ground where the monster shadow had thrown you and you weren't moving. I wanted to check on you so b-bad…but I couldn't draw its attention back to you. I managed to insult it enough for it to attack me, I know that it was kind of a stupid move but I didn't care at the time still don't in fact, I managed to s-surprise it with my new mobility and we fought…and if you think our fights are bad Lawliet you should have seen this one. It was a true life and death battle, it was still in an s-shadowy form, but it did have a faint human shape to it, anyway it started to taunt me about what it was going to do to y-you…and I snapped. I managed to kill it somehow, I can't quite remember how I did it but…anyway I ran over to your b-bleeding body and tried to revive you-and no pervert I did not do CPR or anything like t-that. You came to after a moment and we t-talked."

Raito took a deep breath to stave off any more sobbing and continued.

You didn't seem to recognize me at all. You told me your name was L Lawliet and that you were a d-detective and…well stuff. Anyway after all that you told me that I kind of now have this new ability. It was strange…I can't control it or anything but sometimes when I dream…I will be able to tell a bit about what's about to happen, especially if it involves people close to me. I can't tell the future or anything like that but…well like you saw. I dreamed that my family was in d-danger, I knew that it was going to be at 9 o'clock and that's it. It is the first time it's happened…I didn't know if it would be true or anything like that but I couldn't take that kind of chance, especially if it involved my f-family. So that's it, it doesn't really matter if you believe me or not…all that matters is that I told you."

Ryuzaki had been silent through the entire thing. No emotion showed on his face or in his eyes. Finally after Raito finished his story and just started to sob quietly did Ryuzaki speak.

"I get the feeling that you might not be telling me the whole truth but…for the most part I have a feeling that you're telling me the truth. No matter how weird it sounds I know that Raito-kun's pride would not let him spill such a fanciful tale without it being true. So all I have to say is this. Thank you Raito, thank you so much for telling me the truth."

And with that being said L bent down over the surprised Raito and started to lightly lap up with his tongue the tears that had spilled from Raito's eyes, he then moved up a bit to stare at Raito's disbelieving wide eyes. L seemed to be searching for something in them.

He must have found it because the next thing Raito knew was he was being kissed gently but firmly on the lips.

--

**Edited-12/01/08**

Ok I'm going to end it here but in the next chapter it will pick up right back up from here. They still have a lot more talking and…_Kissing(along with other stuff, 'pervert grin') _that needs to be done but I'm very tired and just wrote most of this chapter in one-go ;.; I hurt. _Sorry no real lime here but it will be in the next damned chapter (I PROMISE YOU!)_

Another reason I'm posting this up without finishing the scene is that this is getting to long again(I did not expect it to take 25 pages in the rescue scene, should have expected it though) another is that its been almost 5 or so days since my last update and I know some people are dying for another chapter.

I will try to have the next chapter up by this weekend (no promises) so you can see more of Raito's and L's talk. They have so much more to discussion before heading back to headquarters. For L…well he will want to know about this Ryu-chan business XD and Raito has a few questions of his own that needs to be answered.

PLEASE REVIEW!! I GOT SO MANY FOR MY LAST CHAPTER! I WOULD LOVE IT IF YOU REIVEW LIKE THAT AGAIN XDDD PLEASE PLEASE REVIEW!!


	11. Chapter 11

Warnings: LIME BABY!! Ahem light lime to be realistic, I don't have the guts yet to do a full lime yet, (let alone even think about writing a lemon in the future T.T), some humor, fluffy to the extreme!!

This chapter can almost be catalogued as a filler type chapter; it just has the conversation and stuff in it, next chapter they will be back in headquarters and then that's when the fun really beginnings.

Thank you all once again for reviewing my story! Here are my replays:

AikiaJuniper, - hehe yes it was quite the wicked chapter w hmm I like my cut-offs and cliffy hangers…mostly because I'm a sadistic person ;D

Black-Dranzer-1119, - I also love submissive Raito! YEA UKE-RAITO!! We love you like that! XD

Chibi Tsuki Hikari, - hahah Ryuk wetting his pants would have been great! XD hehe I really do love how Sayu and L reacted to each other, I also almost died laughing when I typed out L's replay to her. Hehehe, awww I loves you to (huggles right back) ;)

Lady Vampyre Nefertiri, - Thanks for the review :D I always try to replay to any review that I get. Soo keep reviewing and I will keep replaying XD enjoy this chapter :)

Keelia, - I've been dying to use the idea of Raito threatening Ryuk about destroying all the apples in the world. I mean really why hasn't anyone else thought of it? It's just so prefect and funny XD hehehe I might even do it if Ryuk consists of being a pain in the butt to Raito ov0 heh I'm glad you enjoyed that chapter as much as I enjoyed writing it :D

Yoshiluvr, - aww that's too bad. I really hope your mother finds those Microsoft works cds for you soon. w (prays for you to the god of all things yaoi and sacred) Thanks for reviewing ;)

Aya-Shoru, - heheh glad you really like it! XD like I've been saying updates will be spondaic in which I might update right after an update or take a week or so off to do real-life stuff x.x anyway hope you enjoy this chapter as much as the last one.

Detective1412, - hehe yea poor Raito, it's just not his day (bad mojo-jojo aka bad karma X3) Thanks for the review! XD

Pouf, - I also hate MLA format-IT'S PURE EVIL INCARNATE!! I'm glad your enjoying my story I hope my chapters and story will continue to just get better and better v I address Raito's seeming weakness at the end of these replays but I will repeat it here. Raito has gone through hell in the pass couple of hours, I wouldn't be surprised if I made him have a psychotic break soon or something, also remember he his changed somewhat, he at times will be a lot more submissive seeming then normal, but don't worry he will bounce right back into snarky-Raito that we all love X3 Also your right, L doesn't really believe in the whole vision story that Raito had told him, but he will accept it for now. Heheh not quite yaoi yet but I'm working at it! XDDD hmm I never have watched Code Geass my self but it sounds interesting enough…maybe I'll watch it :) your essays sound really tough but I know you can do it! :D

Dark Oracle, - I'm so happy you thought my last chapter was awesome! It was kind of dramatic wasn't it? I loved Sayu and I wanted Raito to have his teddy bear back so the idea of her giving it back to her brother came to me, it was sooooo cute!! X3 yes kiss…more kisses to come in this chapter XP Yes a virus to wipe out the apples hahahaha take that Ryuk!!

Blood-fire-dragon, - hehe yep everything and everyone is screwing with poor Raito's mind. Heh mush-mind-Raito see him drool with numbness XP…ok…anyway here's the next chapter hope you like it and I hope you feel better soon :-)

Kyorose, - Yes Sayu rules! And I also love the conversation between her and L…I'm not sure if L even knows himself if he was serious or not. ;S hmmm anyway glad you enjoyed it and hope you continue to for many more chapters to come! ;-) Thanks I believe I did pretty ok on my mid-term. XDDD you are so nice to wish me luck on it (hugs you tightly) XD

Bxbyaoifan, - I'm so happy you love this fic! XD here's the next chapter for you.

G-Wing Gurl, - Yes Sayu is sadly not used much in any fics and if she is she's not smart or anything like that (at least in the ones I have read) I love her to pieces and so I made her cool, she will probably be a minor-major character in this (not sure what that means but she will be in and out of this story) Yes Raito's half-truth story to L was good I think, it tells L something without giving him the whole picture. :p

Toraus, - hehe I also loved that part! It was a pleasure to write and I almost chocked laughing ;3 Thank you for the review!

Karin Dihanich, - I will always (or I will really _really_ try) to updated at least once a week, if not more then that. Hehe don't worry, nothing much could keep Ryuk down for long, even a threat to his precious apples, he'll be back sooner or later, depending on when I want him to stir havoc again. XD

Vanity, - hehe I hoped that the fight scene would turn out well, I'm glad it did .; hehe I don't think anyone saw Sayu's theory on L being a human Ryu-chan coming! Hehe I love being unpredictable it's so much fun! Yes Raito will be a uke and that's all I can say, sorry Raito dear but you are a bottom butt 'w';….I can't believe I just said that. Heheh here's the next chapter for you all! XDDD

I forgot to say this in the last chapter but Raito's fear of the eyes of a zombie…well it's kind of my own phobia .

Also some people have addressed to me that Raito has been kind of weak lately. Well…if you went through all that crap I just put him through in the last couple of chapters and he really hasn't had a brake yet from all of it to sit down and process what's been going on, not to mention he's hurt yet again and on an emotional rollercoaster, I'm surprised he hasn't been given anti-depressants and sent to the therapist by now. O.0 don't worry though he will be back to being snarky–Raito in the next chapter…he's still a submissive though; he'll just fight for the top sometimes…XD…and occasionally win. X.x

So it's basically an L/Raito seme/uke pairing with a little surprise Raito/L every once in a while. XD

Now onward to smuttiness and confessions!!

--

Raito couldn't have been more confused, why was L kissing him?

Raito's mind went merciful blank though when L swiped his tongue against his closed lips, practically begging for entrance into Raito's mouth.

Raito could feel that Ryuzaki was trying to hold back, but the thing was…Raito didn't want him to.

Raito's earlier crying fit had all but vanished, all the self-loathing and misery he had been feeling before was gone, completely replaced with a burning primal lust.

Deciding to discard for now any doubts or confusions that he might have, Raito parted his lips slightly, allowing the insistent tongue entrance.

Raito dimly heard L give out a low moan that mixed with his own when their tongues finally meet. The kiss that had started out so soft and innocent soon became a searing mash of lips and tongue.

Ryuzaki swept his tongue all around Raito's mouth, as if trying to memorize it with the touch of his tongue alone. Ryuzaki's tongue lapped at the roof of Raito's mouth, caressing it firmly and demanding.

Raito let out a mewing sound that was answered with a low growl.

Ryuzaki then moved on and started to sweep his teeth gently, lapping up each one individually, taking great care to memorize every single grove and dip of Raito's mouth.

Raito lifted his arms and finally wrapped them around Ryuzaki's head, holding Ryuzaki's hair in a firm grasp. He swept his hands through the soft hair, the scent of strawberry's once again filled Raito's nose, causing him to purr in contentment.

He hummed in pleasure as Ryuzaki's tongue started to tangle with his own. Raito instinctively tried to take command of the kiss then but Ryuzaki would have none of that.

Feeling Ryuzaki start to pull back Raito let out a whine of distress, he didn't even realize he made it till he heard L give out a low growl of satisfaction right after.

Starting to feel himself come down from the pleasure high he was on, Raito was about to start demanding what exactly Ryuzaki thought he was doing, when he was once again cut-off.

Ryuzaki's head bent down again but he didn't start to kiss Raito again, no instead he started to place butterfly light kisses along Raito's jaw, moving upwards till he reached Raito's ear lobe, which he then started to gently suck. Nipping here and there gently with his teeth in order to incite the whimpers that Raito was let out whenever L hit a more responsive spot.

Raito let out a near silent moan of pleasure as Ryuzaki started to molest his ear heavily with his tongue. He then buried his face in Ryuzaki's hair, taking in the sweet scent that was purely L.

"Lawlieeettt…"

Raito couldn't stop himself from moaning out L's real name when L's tongue started to lap and lick his way down Raito's sensitive neck.

L gave out a truly impressive growl that went straight to Raito's lower regions when he heard Raito say his name.

Raito let out a noise that greatly resembled a squeal when Ryuzaki latched onto the side of his neck and sucked.

It must have been an extra sensitive spot because Raito could not stop himself from moaning loudly in total bliss as Ryuzaki licked and nipped at that same spot. No doubt with the intention of marking him.

Raito didn't know if he had ever been this hard in his life. And that counted both of his lives. Sure he had sex before, well not in his current body, his teenage body right now was a virgin one, but in his pervious life about a year after L's death in fact, he had been forced into having sex with Misa.

It had been one of the most horrifying, scarring experiences in his young life.

Misa had been bemoaning about not being able to show her full love to him now that their enemy was dead and gone, after denying her for the 2450th time she had finally attempted to commit suicide in the hope that it would finally break his resolve to never touch her. Sadly for Raito it had worked, he didn't want to lose the valuable shinigami eyes that Misa had possessed, which he would have if she killed herself. Also…he might have felt a tiny almost microscopic feeling of guilt for the way he used her. The point being was he gave up his virginity to Misa, and regretted it to this day.

Raito's mind went blank again when L gave one more vicious bite and lick to his neck and moved back up to devour Raito's mouth once more.

Raito finally came to his senses a few minutes later, it seemed that L was getting a little to into what he was doing to Raito and had started to let his hands wander around Raito's body. Only when Raito felt L's hand suddenly cup his rather rigid erection and start to rub it feverously did Raito finally wake up from his pleasure haze and realize what was happening.

"Ryuzaki s-stop! Stop this right n-now L!! Hnn…please stop…LAWLIET GET A HOLD OF YOURSELF RIGHT NOW AND STOP!!"

After trying to get L's attention and failing, Ryuzaki had even started to rub harder at Raito's groin when he heard Raito telling him to stop. Only when Raito screamed out his real name did L finally hear through his lustful abandon, what Raito was actually saying.

L suddenly lifted his head as far back away from Raito as possible. He also moved his hands up in an almost surrendering position, as if they to needed to be as far away from the delectable treat in front of him as possible, in the case that they just might continue to molest Raito without L's permission.

A few minutes passed by as Raito tried to slow his breathing, which had picked up after that heavy make-out session. He still hadn't moved his head from L's lap, he didn't really want to bother with moving at all, considering he still hurt like hell and L's lap was very comfortable…well it was before L's evident enjoyment of what they had just been engaged in started to poke him in the head.

Raito gave a sigh of exasperation and amusement before slowly lifting himself till he was sitting beside L instead of on him.

Seeing the confused and guilt ridden face of L peering at him Raito explained.

"You don't have to worry Ryuzaki; I'm not getting up because I'm mad or anything like that. It's just…well your hard-on was poking my head and it was starting to get annoying with my headache and all. Also we need to have a serious talk right now and if I get to close to you again we just might end up screwing each other in the back seat of this car with Watari not 2 feet away from us."

Raito was fascinated by Ryuzaki's face which had turned an impressive shade of red when Raito mentioned L's rather evident problem and by the time that Raito had finally finished talking it seemed that L's entire body had turned inflame, if the redness if his neck was anything to go by.

"I apologize Raito-kun, I don't know what got into me…I guess it must have been an adrenaline rush from all that happened just now. Also when you got hurt by that man I…I was mad, no I was livid that he had dared to touch you…to hurt you like that and I couldn't help but want to make sure you were ok, I guess I got carried away…I'm sorry…"

Raito had sat up some and while it had pulled at his stomach wound some causing it to slightly reopen he had managed not to flinch. When he heard that L tried to pass off his rather passionate kisses as an adrenaline rush he felt both a sense of annoyance and fondness, it seemed that L was not quite ready to admit that he might just be attracted to his number one suspect yet.

'Oh well, I guess it ok. I won't push him or anything like that. He must be feeling really confused right now. Not only does he believe that I get visions now, that somehow come true, but he has also been through almost just as much as me in the last few hours. He must be very tired right now, insomniac or no insomniac he still needs some sleep. I bet he hasn't slept in over a week by now. Truthfully he might not quite believe my modified story entirely but he will accept it for now, at least until we are both ready for the truth. Which reminds me…'

"Hey Ryuzaki now that I've answered your question why don't you answer one of mine. To make it fair we can switch back and forth so that we won't be fighting for answers."

Ryuzaki had pulled his legs up and was currently sitting in his usual crouch with his knees up and his ever present thumb was already being nibble at. He crooked his head to the side in an all too sweet manner as he pondered Raito's idea.

"What if one of us asks a question that the other doesn't want to answer?"

Raito pondered this for a moment before answering.

"Well…I guess we can say pass and then be asked another question. It will stop us from trying to kill each other for answers at least."

Ryuzaki nodded his consent of this, but Raito could see the wary grimace on his face as he most likely wondered just what Raito's question was.

"Ok my first question is where did you get the gun? I'm pretty sure you didn't have it in that damn white room because I'm sure you would have shot me at one point or another, at least non-fatal enough to get us both out of that hell hole."

Ryuzaki looked surprised at this question. It made Raito wonder what he was expecting Raito to ask. Maybe about what happened a few minutes ago? As much as Raito wanted to ask about what had really gotten into L he knew that L was just not ready enough to deal with that issue. Soon though they would have to talk about it, weather L wanted to or not.

"Well Raito-kun, do you remember when we were running through headquarters towards the exist and I detoured into a room and then left quickly again without letting you see inside? Well that was a small armory that held some equipment that was all ready to go. I grabbed a gun off a table and left again just as quickly. It was already loaded."

Raito nodded his head absentmindly as he remembered this.

"I remember now…I got mad at you when you stopped and closed the door to prevent me from following you. I was just about to open it up to yell at you when you came tearing out again. I forgot all about it when we got into the car; my family was the only thing I could think about at the time."

"You really love your family don't you Raito-kun? It funny really…the report I had gathered about you profiled that you were somewhat indifferent to your family, almost apathetic really."

Raito felt his hair stand up on end when Ryuzaki spoke about how he had perceived Raito's feelings in regard to his family. He also felt anger but was quick in not letting it show. Because in a way Ryuzaki was only stating the facts and truths, Raito _had_ been apathetic to his family, hell he had once told Ryuk that he would kill them himself if they interfered with his plans as Kira. The Kira-no Yagami Raito that he had been before had been a true sociopath.

But that had been _before_. Before he went through the pain and torment that was associated with being Kira. Before killing the only person he had ever gave a damn about, even if he didn't know about it at the time. Before he had to become truly two-faced, becoming both Kira and the fake L. Before fighting and scheming against L's successors. Before being caught and killed. Before going to Mu. Before meeting the Shinigami King and the Little Mother and learning that he was the solo cause of the end of the world. Before going back into time. Before everything.

He had changed, and he knew that L was becoming aware of these changes and was confused by them.

Raito just shook his head and told Ryuzaki in a voice he hoped was calm and indifferent.

"Well whatever you thought I was you were wrong. Because I'm not Kira, I'm not a killer, I care for my family and I will give up everything for them in order to make them happy. So I'm sorry but whatever information you had on me was false up until this point. What you see right now L is who I really am."

Ryuzaki just looked at him closely. As if determining if what Raito said was true or not. After a moment or two of silence of which Raito just stared right on back did Ryuzaki slowly nod his head. He still had a puzzled look on his face, as if he wasn't quite convinced yet but he did drop it for now.

"I hope that that answers your question Raito-kun because I have another one for you. What is this whole fiasco about me being called Ryu-chan? Does it have something to do with that bear of yours?"

It had been a question that Raito had been dreading. It wasn't that it was a terrible secret or anything, but the truth was it was kind of embarrassing.

"I guess you wouldn't accept a pass would you?"

Ryuzaki just shook his head no and stared at Raito hard.

Raito gave a sigh and explained. It was only fair really; L had told him something about his childhood, now it was Raito's turn.

"Well you see it's like this, Ryu is this stuffed panda bear right here. My sister calls him Ryu-chan because she thinks its cuter or something like that. Anyway I got this bear when I was born; mother and father had given it to me. You could say that it was truly my first ever friend, if you can call a stuffed bear a friend. When Sayu was brought home from the hospital I…I made a promise to myself that I would protect her and make her happy. When she had first started to cry the only thing that I thought of that would make her happy would be Ryu, he always made me happy so I…I gave him away. Anyway after that my sister and Ryu became almost inseparable, I once asked her when I got older why she always dragged that bear around with her, and do you know what she told me? She said she loved Ryu so much because I had given it to her. Because it had once been so precious to me it was now precious to her."

Raito gave a shaky sigh as he recalled all this. He had lowered his head before he started to speak so he couldn't really see what kind of expression that L had.

"Anyway we both kind of out grew him somewhat. Truthfully I had thought my mother had thrown him out years ago. I should have known that Sayu would never have aloud that. She must have had him in her closet or something. Anyway as to why she called you Ryu-chan…well you have to admit L, you kind of resemble a human panda."

Ryuzaki gave an unimpressed snort at being called a panda. Raito still hadn't looked up but he couldn't stop the slight smile as he heard it.

"You heard my sister though; it seemed she had been wishing that our old bear would come to life and protect me. Which in a way annoys me, do I look like I need protection or something?"

Raito could hear Ryuzaki draw in breath to answer, he quickly cut him off.

"Don't answer that L, it was a rhetorical question. I pretty sure she was just kind of messing around; though I think when she first saw you she really did believe that you were Ryu. She knows that when I was a child that I only really trusted Ryu and I cared for him like nothing else. It's kind of silly I know but…I didn't have much in the way of friends when I was a child. I was too different you can say, I was smarter then all of the children my age and uninterested in their petty small problems or games. I believe that Sayu believed the only one I would trust now would be my old bear, because I had once trusted him wholeheartedly with all of my problems, now it seems that she has appointed you as my guardian now. Which reminds me…did you really have to play along with her earlier? I mean really now, that was not funny what you said about Sayu being your future sister-in-law, you do know my parents were still in the room right? My dad is already fishy about your motives about me, how do you think he's going to react to what you said? I imagine that both Watari and I are going to have to strip you in a bullet proof vest for the rest of the Kira investigation, maybe also a bullet proof helmet too."

Raito could practically hear Ryuzaki whiten as he thought about what Yagami-san would do to him if he thought that L was doing something to his son. Raito couldn't help but smirk in sadistic pleasure as Ryuzaki started to whimper in fear.

"Don't worry Ryuzaki I won't let him hurt you…much."

Raito couldn't help the snicker that came out as he said that last bit.

"Raito-kun hasn't changed at all, he's still is a sadistic bastard that would let his father hurt his Ryu-chan who only want to protect him and follow his future sister-in-law's pleas of keeping her helpless brother from being molested."

Raito's snicker died as Ryuzaki countered attacked.

"Haha L real funny, the only one I have to be worried about that would even think of molesting me would be you. And you are not Ryu so stop playing around. Anyway it's my turn now to ask a question. This has been nagging at me and I need to ask…why didn't you help me earlier? I mean I was being attacked and I was about to be killed. Why did it take you forever to help out?"

Raito looked up finally to look at Ryuzaki. He wanted to see Ryuzaki's face when he explained to him why he didn't help till the last minute.

Ryuzaki's face had hardened in a mask of sadness, guilt and anger.

"If you remember Raito-kun the room was quite dark, the lights had been out and when the intruder had opened the door he hadn't really let any light into the room at all. Because you were closer to him you were able to see him better but I couldn't see anything at all. I heard you all of a sudden, attacking with the baseball bat…I heard the intruder call out and I got out from my hiding spot. I was planning on shooting a non-fatal shot but…_I couldn't see anything. _I tried aiming for the general direction that I knew he was in, but I remembered that you also would be close by to him and I couldn't risk hurting you. When I heard him go down though and you start to shout out to me about calling the police I felt happy that I wouldn't have to shoot anyone…and then you screamed out in pain and I heard you fall. I rushed over towards where I heard everything. I pointed my gun and tried to figure out who was who. You both were so tangled up and I admit I was kind of panicking, also I was enraged. How could I let you get hurt like that? I was helpless and I didn't like it one bit. And that's when it happened, you shouted out for help and I was able to tell just where you where on the ground, so I pointed my gun a few inches higher and shot. I remember reaching out to the wall to steady myself and touching the light switch. Could you believe that it was only a few inches away from me the entire time? Added to the fact that you were hurt and that I was having a bad day to begin with I imagine that my expression might have been a bit on the scary side. I could tell because when you called out for help the second time you couldn't keep the apprehension from your voice. I haven't had to use a gun in a while so I was somewhat out of practice; it was only luck that I got in a heart shot."

'Yea luck right, just keep thinking that Ryuzaki and you'll be able to sleep better at night. Well sleep as much as you do anyway.'

Raito looked at L in the face and saw that he was telling the truth.

"Ok thank you for tell me, I was wondering why it took you so long and this explains it."

Ryuzaki just nodded back and let out a small sigh, when he saw that Raito was looking at him in slight confusion he just gave a weary smile.

"A lot has happened in the last day Raito-kun and I can't shake the feeling that it will only get worse from here on…I confess that I'm perplexed about what is going on between us and as to those sudden visions of yours…well let's just say that I can't really believe in that 100 percent. Even if it's true, why now? How did you acquire them and what kind of significance does it hold for us? There are so many questions Raito-kun but answers on the other hand I've learned are in a much lesser degree. I believe we should hold off this talk for now and get you some medical help. You hide it well but you couldn't fool me, your wound on your stomach has reopened again hasn't it? Let us return now to headquarters and get you patched up, then we will both eat something and then get a few more hours of sleep. We will have to hold on this for a few days…the Kira case is still ongoing if you remember Raito-kun and you are still a suspect."

Raito remembered, how could he forget? He himself gave a small sigh also and tried to shift into a more comfortable position as his wounds were starting to hurt once more now that he wasn't concentrating on something else. He was surprised when a pale hand reached out and maneuvered him gently but firmly so that his head was resting on Ryuzaki's shoulder.

He didn't question it and L didn't say anything else. Raito clenched the bear Ryu to his chest once more, it had fallen into his lap when he had sat up before, and let his eyes close. Ryuzaki was warm and very comfortable. He felt L reach out and tap on the glass in a weird pattern, no doubt signaling a code to Watari that they could go back to headquarters now.

Now that he wasn't talking Raito's mind wandered back to what happened earlier. A slight flush overtook his features but luckily for him L wasn't looking at him at the moment. In fact L's head had tilted some till his cheek was resting on top of Raito's head.

'What happened earlier…I kind of wish I didn't stop it. But no, we needed to talk and I know that Lawliet is not ready yet for our messed up relationship to go that far…no matter that he was the one who started it. Hell I don't even now if I'm ready for that yet. But I have to admit it felt good, no better then good it felt right, like everything had become just prefect, like it was meant to be or something like that. But not yet, nether of us is ready and I still have to prove that I'm not Kira; the killings have started again so a new Kira has already been born…and it will be the last one I will make sure of it. Lawliet might be in lust with me right now, but he will never have any other feelings for me if he still suspects me of being a mass-murderer. Only after I clear myself will I truly be able to win over L. I can start small now, but later…later I can tell L the truth. The whole truth, so that he will accept me for whom I really am and become immortal like me. He has to…I can't bear to think of if he didn't. I-I think I would really die…No, no more thinking like that right now. I need to focus on the Kira case right now, now that Ryuk has been taken care of all I really need to worry about is Rem…shit I forgot about her, fuck. Ah screw this I'll think about it tomorrow, I'll make my strategies and plans then, I'm to tired and hurt to do anything else. Besides L's shoulder really is comfortable and I don't know how much longer we got till we get to headquarters, might as well enjoy it.'

With that last thought Raito stealthy snuggled closer to Ryuzaki. Hearing a slight intake of breath from him Raito guessed he wasn't stealthy enough, oh well it really didn't matter because after a second he felt Ryuzaki snuggle right back.

Raito let out a truly happy smile that unfortunate for Ryuzaki was hidden under his tucked head.

But Raito was sure that L could sense it. L Lawliet always could tell just what Yagami Raito was truly feeling even under all his masks.

--

**Edited- 12/4/08**

Ok I know it was short and wayyy more fluffy then usual but they need this fluff to hold onto, they have to get through the next few chapters of hell I'm going to put them through! kiracoughcasecoughtimecough

AHH how was the lime? It's my first time EVER writing something like that and I need feedback! Good? Bad? Sucks so much I should never try again? TELL ME!! If I get some good feedback on it maybe I'll try for something heavier later in the story…but if not…well I'll see. 0.o

Remember this was kind of a filler chapter, it's not meant to be long, so sorry if you all were expecting another long chapter, maybe next time.

Also I'm sorry that I took so long in this chapter, but real life's a bitch and I'm her sub 'w'; wow…where the hell do I come up with this shit? Anyway hope you enjoyed this and please remember to leave comments.

That means…REVIEW PEOPLE! REVIEW LIKE YOUR YAOI OBSESSED LIVES DEPEND ON IT!!


	12. Chapter 12

Warnings: Fluffy, lots of humor, slight angst, some verbal fighting, slight lime, oh look its Zaki again!!

Oh you want to know what's the coolest thing ever? Detective1412 made a fan-trailer of 'Darkness within your Light'!! It's the coolest, bestest vid I have ever seen!! I will be posting the link to it on my profile page. YOU HAVE TO SEE IT!! It's like a preview to my story! XDDDDDD please, please go see it and rate it and leave nice comments. I'm sure that Dectective1412 spent a lot of time making it and it came out so well! So both Detective1412 and I would appreciate it if you go check it out. As soon as you're done reading this chapter and reviewing it of course!

Thank you all once again for reviewing, it brings great joy to my little writer's heart, hehe here are my responses:

Pouf, - hehe I also think that Raito was trying to convince himself more then L that they should stop kissing because they might get caught by Watari. Yep Raito is getting a lot more confident and accepting of his situation. He is now willing to face what ever challenges I will most likely put him up against. XP hehe poor L I know! He's really is confused but he's taking it so well, oh some more light lime at the end of this chapter, no really big yaoi scenes yet but they be coming! XD

Lady Vampyre Nefertiri, - hehe Raito is actually easier to write as being insecure and uncertain but I tried to make him a bit more snarky in this chapter…not sure how well I did, but I tried! I will be trying harder in later chapters too. Hmmm Rem won't be here for a while yet so I'm not quite sure what her reaction will be to the new Raito, I know that she will no longer hate him…but other then that I haven't gotten that far. ;p

Dark Oracle, - Hehehee I'm so happy that your happy about them finally getting to the smooches! X3 there is a little more fluffiness in this chapter but there is some slight angst as well, don't worry the fluffiness out weights the angst! XD I hope this update makes your day to! :D

Black-Dranzer-1119, - Aww thank you! I also loved the make out session! It was surprisingly fun to write! Thanks so much for the review! XD

Pink Feline, - Thank you! I'm glad that you liked my lime, it was fun to write but it was also difficult to, I also agree, I don't think that there will be much screaming during the smex (maybe at the end of the smex though) XwX; hehe thanks for the review! XDD

Chibi Tsuki Hikari, - Yes long live the FLUFF!! XD hehe I like writing fluff most of the time more then the angst, but I think that every good story needs a healthy dose of both. I just kind of tipped the scale with my last chapter in favor for the Fluffiness XD, it was fun! Oh my god Raito's father's reaction is going to be so much fun to write!! Heeh I kind of give you readers a sneak preview in this chapter, pay close attention to what everyone is saying about how daddy dearest will react! XP

Sayoko's fire, - hehe here's some more lime for you in this chapter, not as much as the last chapter but our boys are really tired :P also I know I already replayed to your question that you asked me and I've finally got a real answer for you…it will happen in the next chapter!! hehe if anyone else is reading this I bet they wonder what I mean…hehe

Jesus-of-suburbia2o2o, - wow people are recommending my story… ;-;( tears of happiness) that makes me so happy! Heeh I like the idea of god as a girl, and not just a girl but she takes the form of a small child XD I love my little mother character to pieces! Oh god chocolate bars growing on trees! XD that sounds wonderful! Wow my L is in-character? YEA!! Yes Raito is a tiny bit OOC but he's suppose to be, I'm trying to keep L in character as much as possible while making him out of character enough to have a sexual relationship with Raito O.o it's hard. Yes it is hard for both of them, to share and kiss and all that while still being there usual closed up selves. XD oh well its fun! Eep! I try to update at least once a week! Hehe you might have to wait for a while for this story to be over, I want this story to be long :D Aww the compliments! Thank you so much! TxT (tears of such great joy that you won't believe it if you didn't see it.) I love LxRaito!! It's the best seme/uke pairing ever! I might add once in a while **slight** RaitoxL for all my fans who want it but this story will be first and foremost LXRAITO!! Thank you so much for the wonderful review and I'm hoping you enjoy this chapter! XDDD

Vanity, - hehehe thank you for the complement on my lime writing skills XD I try so hard. Heheh Ryuk will be back and as for if he will know that Raito is not really a god well…you'll just have to wait and see nya? XD Muhahahah…oh and don't worry about the entire task force seeing Raito's shinigami form I will try to incorporate it somehow into this story so it will not be only L that sees Raito's shinigami form XD

Dectective1412, - I said this once and I will say it again. YOU ARE GOD!! XP XD hehe I truly appreciated the trailer that you made so much! Thank you!!

Mizu1411, - I love Sayu so much and she's just too cute for words! XP hehe Raito's and his father's expressions were priceless. If it had been animated it would have been drop to the floor hilarious! XD I purposely made the questioning seem like 20 questions, I thought it would make it easier for them to talk that way 'w';

Blood-fire-dragon, - the embarrassments was fun to write! XP don't worry I won't have an aneurysm…I just had a heart attack! Hehehe just kidding XD glad you liked it, thanks for the review!

Kyorose, - I know that L's speech pattern is a little unlike him…I can't help it; I like dialogue so he's a bit more chatty then usual. Sorry ;-; I'm glad you like the lime though X3 there will of course be some big problems with Misa and the new Kira, not so much Rem after Raito talks to her…still its going to get interesting (hopefully soon)

Alabirdie, - Thanks I'm glad you think my story is awesome! XD hehe I love stories when Raito is given another chance and goes back in time, it helps me also deal with the way DeathNote ends. XDDD

AikiaJuniper, - haha yes more cliffies! (Hands reviewer a tissue) don't worry I update soon enough so that the cliffies aren't that bad! I hope…XwX…yes the cute!! It's so much fun! Hehe don't worry Raito's ok…he has super shinigami powers (sound effect: whoosh) x.x hehe

Baow, - I'm so glad you love it, love it, love it! XD Here's some more! XDDDD

G-Wing Gurl, - hehee 'fluffy goodness like giant marshmallows yum' Wonderful XD I'm glad you enjoyed the lime and I will be adding a bit now and then around in this story. :D oh yes much awkwardness and scariness (daddy dearest is in protective mode for his son's virginity) pretend that Raito's a teenage girl and then think of how his father would reach to thinking that L was molesting his child…Ox0 L is so dead…XD

--

It had taken about 15 minutes to make it back to the headquarters; it seemed that Watari had decided to take it extra slow, most likely to make the ride smoother for the comfort of his injured charges.

Raito let the silence that had overtaken both L and him to lure him into a light doze. He's head was still laying on L's shoulder and L's head was still laying gently on top of his head, every now and then Raito heard L take a slight whiff of his hair, just like Raito did to Ryuzaki earlier, Raito wondered what he smelled like to L.

'Most likely blood and sweat, god I want a shower so bad right now. Also I need to check my wounds alone, I would have figured that with my powers and all that I would have healed by now, although if I did or do soon it will be hard to explain it to L. Hmmm, this is getting complicated, not that it wasn't complicated to begin with but still. Well, when we get to headquarters I will ask L if I can have a shower before anything else…though food sounds so wonderful right now, I'll even eat one of L's precious cakes right now if it was offered to me…wow I really must be hungry.'

Raito just sat there musing on what was going to happen tomorrow when everyone on the task force came back from there one-day vacation, he pretty much figured that it wouldn't end prettily, especially for Ryuzaki.

Raito finally snapped out of his doze when he felt the car stop. Ryuzaki as well woke up from whatever trance he had been in and sat up some, he didn't make Raito move away from him which Raito was glad for, he was still very tired.

Watari opened the door for them, causing Raito to let out a silent sigh of regret before he straighten up himself and followed Ryuzaki out of the car. He quickly stuffed Ryu into his pocket, well more like he stuffed half of him inside of his pants pocket, the head of the teddy panda bear was still out in the opened. It may have looked completely ridiculous but Raito didn't really care at this point.

He almost missed Watari's wide eye shocked expression when he saw Raito but caught it in time before it could disappear. Ryuzaki had been already turned away so he didn't see it. Raito wondering why Watari would have such an expression decided to ask him.

"Watari-san is everything ok? What's wrong?"

Ryuzaki had turned back around when he heard Raito speak; he looked confused but also turned to look at Watari.

Watari began to look a tad bit uncomfortable; he then put a passive expression on before giving a slight cough and addressed Raito about his question.

"Well you see Yagami-kun it's just that…well I would advise you to wear a turtle-neck tomorrow."

Now Raito was just baffled, why did he have to wear a turtle-neck?

Ryuzaki had been turned towards Watari staring at him as Watari spoke, but he turned his attention back to Raito when Watari mention that Raito would be advised to wear a turtle-neck, his eyes widen in sudden understanding, a slight smirk of satisfaction crossed his face, only further baffling Raito.

"I don't understand sir, why do I have to wear a turtle-neck?"

Watari now looked highly uncomfortable and just gave out another cough and said that Raito would figure it out when they got back inside and got cleaned up.

Raito still baffled tried to ask L what Watari meant but L just repeated what Watari said, that Raito would find out soon enough when they got cleaned up.

Raito let out a huff of annoyance at them for not telling him anything but followed them all just the same. Well he tried to anyway, about five or so steps from the car his legs finally gave out under him. He would have fallen to the granite floor if L didn't have the reflexes of a freaking cat.

Raito was mortified that once more Ryuzaki was carrying him bridal style.

"Wait Ryuzaki put me down! I can walk, really I can, it was just a dizzy spell or something. There's no reason for you to carry me."

"On the contrary Raito-kun there is a big reason for me to carry you, or did you forget that you got a knife plunged into your leg not to long ago? I would think that it would be painful enough that it would be hard to forget. Besides…I enjoy holding Raito-kun."

Ryuzaki had whispered the last part so Watari didn't hear, whatever protest that Raito was about to come up with died in this throat. How could he protest now that Ryuzaki had just admitted that he wanted to touch him?

'Well…I guess it's ok, I mean my leg does hurt and no matter what I say I know I can't walk at the moment, my leg is really hurting not to mention that I think it's bleeding again. At least L doesn't seem to be in total denial of what's going on between us, that's good. And I admit, just to myself at least, that I enjoy being held by L just as much as he seems to enjoy holding on to me.'

Raito just let out a sigh of irritation and exhaustion but didn't protest again. L gave him a slight smile and then concentrated on getting them to their suite. After entering the building they all went straight to the elevator where Watari pushed the button that would direct them to the floor that both L and Raito now lived on.

Before they got off the elevator Watari asked him if he needed him to go get anything. Ryuzaki politely asked him to bring both him and Raito something light to eat and to also bring more bandages. Watari gave a nod of understanding and remained on the elevator as Ryuzaki disembarked from the elevator with Raito still in his arms.

"Yes sir, I will be up momentarily, as soon as I get some food and more medical supplies for the both of you."

With that said, Watari pushed an elevator button and the doors closed.

So that just left only himself and Ryuzaki on this floor, Ryuzaki remanded oblivious to Raito's sudden discomfort as he walked down the hallway and quite skillfully opened their door with Raito still in his grasp. L moved quickly but very carefully to their shared bedroom.

Raito gave an almost inaudible sigh of relief as L sat him down on their bed, which was still unmade from their quick dash out the door not quite an hour ago.

As Ryuzaki moved away slightly after placing him down, Raito felt a slight chill as the warmth that Ryuzaki had proved left him. He looked down at his chest, and came to a slight alarming and for some reason funny conclusion.

Raito looked up as Ryuzaki moved over to the small table that was stationed in the corner of their bedroom, he then watched as Ryuzaki reached into his pocket and removed the set of handcuffs that would soon be on both of their wrists and the key that went to it, lastly he removed the gun that he had just used to shoot at the man who had invaded Raito's family's home.

Raito took another look at his chest before looking back at the turned around L and said in a causal, non-caring voice.

"Hey Ryuzaki, do you want to know what I just came to realize? Well we were in such a rush to save my family that we had forgotten to take a few seconds to get clean up some, or at least change clothing, or at least for me to don a shirt and wipe all the blood that I had all over me from our fight. We were just at my parents home, with my entire family and my father and mother and sister just saw me half naked with cuts and bruises all over my body, and you know that my father knows I didn't have them before he left so…what do you think he's thinking about right now? Hmmm I bet it isn't anything good."

Ryuzaki had frozen as Raito continued to speak; his hands which had been in the middle of disabling his gun had stopped moving completely.

Before L could say anything or for Raito to continue torturing him Watari choose that moment to walk inside the room, pushing a cart filled up with food and on a lower level of the cart Raito say a few first-aid kits and medical supplies.

It seemed that Watari had heard the end of what Raito was saying because he let out a sigh of agreement to Raito's statement that Yagami-san would not be happy tomorrow, not one bit.

Raito decided to address Watari about this issue, both because he was slightly worried for L's continued health, but mostly to scare the shit out of him. For some reason unknown to Raito it seemed that L was slightly frightened by his father, Raito couldn't help but feel a sadistic glee in Ryuzaki's fear of his father.

"Hey Watari-san can we find Ryuzaki a bullet proof jacket or something he could wear under his shirt for a few days? Just until my father has a chance to calm down or something."

Watari nodded his head.

"I've already have considered that idea Yagami-kun and had the foresight to bring up a light weight one with me."

Ryuzaki had finally turned around and just looked on in disbelief as both Watari and Raito talked and argued about how to keep him from getting murdered tomorrow.

"What about a stab plate? Is there one in the vest? I wouldn't put it past my father to carry a knife incase of him missing off a shot and getting his gun taken away from him."

"Hmmm no I haven't thought about that Yagami-kun, I will make sure to add one tonight so that it can be ready for the morning, what kind of knife do you suppose that Yagami-san will bring?"

"Well maybe just an ordinary butcher knife, it's too late in the evening for him to go out a buy a proper blade. Besides I have the feeling my little sister will do a search on him in the morning just to make sure that dad doesn't have anything _to_ fatal on him."

Watari nodded his head.

"Yes, yes that young sister of yours is quite the responsible and brilliant child."

Raito let a small smile cross his face.

"Yes she really is smart huh? Though I can't say the same for Ryuzaki now, saying such a thing with my father in the room, it was darn right suicidal."

Raito finally finish his conversation with Watari as he began to feel a strange warmth start to burn around the area of his belly and his leg. He moved his arm so that it was pressing onto his stomach, right where he had just been slashed at. It wasn't bleeding but…

Suddenly Raito felt something even weirder happen, it was a sensation of caution and warning that coursed through him…the thing was, they weren't his emotions.

Raito decided to heed them for now, he got the feeling that whatever was happening to him right now he needed to be alone; also even though those emotions weren't his…he felt no cause for alarm.

Raito looked up from where his head had slightly bent so he was looking downward. Watari had moved over back to the cart and was rolling out a long set of bandages and gauze. Ryuzaki had also moved over to the cart and was snacking on the strawberry cream pie that Watari had brought up for him along with some more healthier food that Raito didn't doubt was for him.

Neither of them noticed anything out of the ordinary but still…Raito needed to get somewhere alone right now.

"Hey Ryuzaki? Is it alright if I take a shower right now? I mean…I just feel so dirty and I just want to get clean. I'll eat when I get out and I shouldn't bandage any of my wounds till I clean them anyway…so can I? Please?"

Raito wondered if adding the please was smart. While it would most likely get Watari on his side, it just might make Ryuzaki a bit suspicious of why he wanted to go to the bathroom so bad right now.

Luckily for Raito Ryuzaki was so tried and drain by all that that happened he didn't really think about what Raito just said. Ryuzaki hadn't been kidding when he had told Watari earlier that he just wasn't up to thinking to the fullest of his capability right now. For Raito it was a very good thing. It even seemed that L had forgotten that Raito wasn't supposed to leave his sight. Raito being the main suspect for a mass murderer case seemed to completely leave him.

"Hmm sure why not, Watari will show you to the bathroom and there are already some fresh towels in there for your use, when your done come back out, Watari has some clothing for you to sleep in, we will also get you fixed up and get you something to eat before we go to sleep. I imagine that tomorrow will…well I don't really want to imagine what tomorrow will be like so I won't."

Raito let out a slightly strain snort, he then carefully got up to his feet and shuffled after Watari as he showed him to the bathroom, but before leaving he took out Ryu-chan and set him on top of table next to the handcuffs and disabled gun, it looked out of place but…well it also just seemed to fit for some odd reason. After that he continued his shuffle walk after Watari, the bathroom was only about two doors down and Raito of course knew where it was but he couldn't say anything like that so he passively let Watari led him.

Raito made sure that he was bent down enough that his arm as covering the wound. He may not know what was going on but he did know that the heat was getting hotter and it was spreading.

He knew enough at least not to let Watari see his wounds at the moment.

After assuring Watari that he would be perfectly ok bathing by himself and that he would be sure to call out for help if he needed assistance, finally reassuring Watari that he would be fine he shut the door and was finally alone. Raito didn't even bother looking for a lock to the door; he knew that just like last time there wouldn't be one.

Raito turned to the mirror, he was curious about how he looked at the moment, not only about his new found wounds and bruises but he hadn't really seen his appearance since…well a long time. He saw his shinigami form recently thanks to the Shinigami King when he had supplied the mirrors when they had first meet, but he hadn't yet been able to look at his human appearance, his _young_ _teenage_ appearance.

But the first thing that caught his attention wasn't his wounds or his messy, dirty hair or anything like that, no it was the large red mark that graced his neck.

"…?!"

"God damn it Ryuzaki!! You gave me a hicky!! I'm going to fucking kick your ass when I'm done!! My father's going to massacre you when he sees this and leave your carcass to the flesh eating buzzards!"

Raito made sure to yell this out loud enough so that Ryuzaki would be sure to hear him. He now knew why Watari had said to wear a turtle-neck. The mark was bright and huge; it wasn't something that even a near-blind person could miss.

'Damn it! I knew that he marked me earlier but…I didn't expect it to be this big or this red! Geez possessive bastard much? I don't even really know why I'm angry, but well…ah screw it! I'll just have to make sure to give him one to even out the odds!'

Now that he had decided on how to retaliate about the hicky incident, Raito took the time to look at the rest of himself. What he saw appalled him.

He looked like he went one-on-one with a sumo wrestler and lost big time. His chest area and back were covered in black and purple bruises that he didn't doubt would look even more horrible when they started to heal and turned into a yellow and green mess.

There were a few cuts on his body but they weren't bleeding and even seemed to be…disappearing?

'What the fuck-?'

Raito hurried to the shower and turned on the water till it was scolding hot, he knew even if he was alone in here L would still have a camera in here, Raito was thankful that he remembered that the camera angle hit the entire bathroom but the shower, before Ryuzaki had no need to put a camera in the shower because he was always in the room with Raito when he wanted to bath. But just this once Ryuzaki wasn't with Raito. So Raito would have the privacy that he needed. The steam from the boiling water would also help hide him.

Raito quickly but very carefully striped his pants from his body, he took great care as he peeled off the pant leg of his wounded leg. He winched because some of the blood had dried and was clanging a bit to his skin. He endured it though and was finally free from the constriction that the pants had been putting him in. He peeled his boxers off a lot faster and stepped into the shower, it was one of those glass door showers, if he had wanted to take a bath or something there was a giant tub a few feet away, before Raito had never taken one in it because that would mean that L would have to take one with him. But he obviously didn't mind that now and would try to encourage it this time.

After getting in the shower and closing the glass door which had already began to fog up from the steam that the hot water was giving off, the strange warm feeling that had overtaken his wounded areas was slowly fading away. Only when he was sure that he was secure enough where he wouldn't be seen easily did he look at his two pressing wounds.

Well they _had_ been pressing, now the wound on his stomach for instance was almost nothing but a thin scab. It looked like it had been weeks ago that it had happened. He quickly bent some to see the wound on his leg which had been a much worse wound then his belly one. He was even more shocked to see that that wound seemed to be healing even faster then his other one. It was already closed and seemed to be over the scabbing process already, it hadn't even scared.

'Shit…I don't know weather this is a good thing or a bad thing. It seems the more serious the injury is the faster it heals…'

The bruises for some reason were remaining but he could vaguely see that they were already turning a faint yellow around the edges. They were still healing at an overwhelming rate just not as fast as his leg wound or his stomach wound.

'Well…at least I know I most likely can't be killed in my human form as well as my shinigami form. That's good to know at least-'

Before Raito could think anymore about his situation or about his fast healing abilities he once again felt that odd presence in the back of his mind.

'What could that be…oh wait is that Zaki? Shit I can't believe I almost forgot about him. I guess I thought that his nap would have been longer. It's kind of sad that we can't yet communicate our thoughts to each other…but I guess we can communicate our emotions…'

Raito tried to convert a feeling of understanding to Zaki, in the hope that he would realize that Raito knew that it was him. It was easier then he would have thought, right after he thought about Zaki, Raito felt a sense of peace and worry. It seemed that Zaki was happy that Raito had accepted the bond between them and was worried about him?

'Wow I got all that with just two emotions? Well that would make things easier if we can convert what we mean to say with the emotions. Still it would have been easier to talk.'

Raito gave a mental shrug.

'Oh well maybe someday, for now I've got to get use to remembering that Zaki would be sharing my mind space. I guess he was sleeping before so I wasn't really able to feel him, but now…it's kind of nice somehow, this feeling of completeness, the lifenote is as much a part of me as my own heart. That would mean that Zaki is in extension a part of me as well. Just like Kira and I use to be two sides of a coin now it's Zaki and I, only neither of us is evil, or at least I hope not.'

Raito felt like he just had an epiphany. Everything was clear about what Zaki was and what that meant for Raito.

'We just complete ourselves somehow by being together. We are I guess…the same person in a way…'

Raito felt a rush sense of happiness and approval as soon as he finished his theory. It seemed that Zaki was paying attention to Raito's thought and emotional process and agreed to what Raito had come to a conclusion of.

'Well ok that is very interesting I guess, hmmm well I better finish up in here soon before Ryuzaki actually takes the time to think about what he did when he let me bath by myself. I going to have to punish him somehow for the hicky though…maybe I'll wear a T-shirt tomorrow and let dad see it…but then Ryuzaki would be nothing but a corpse…'

He sense Zaki once more, he seemed a lot weaker right know then he had been before, it would seem that Zaki still felt tired and was going back to sleep, he had just been worried about Raito and had woken himself up to see if he was ok. Raito felt a sense of gratitude for have someone worry for him like that. He knew that there were of course others that cared. L being one, but it was slightly different, _Zaki was a part of him, yet not._ Raito couldn't explain it but he sent his thanks to Zaki all the same along with a feeling of -goodnight sleep tight-.

After a moment or two Raito no longer felt Zaki's presence anymore, it showed that he had indeed gone back to sleep.

'Well I guess I better hurry up and get clean up, who knows how much longer I have in here.'

He reached for the shampoo that was on the rack next to him, there were two choices to choose from, one of the bottles was scented vanilla and brown sugar, he liked that one so he picked it up immediately, he took a look at the other bottle that he was sure was Ryuzaki's, he wasn't surprised to see the scent was strawberries and cream.

Raito chuckled in amusement as he was washed his hair. He had wondered if the scent of strawberries that Ryuzaki gave off was just from eating sweets so much or if he had some shampoo that gave off the scent. He now knew that Ryuzaki had a strawberry scent shampoo, but he still believed the reason why Ryuzaki smelled so strongly like strawberries and sweets was mostly because of the sugar the guy ate.

After he was done washing his hair and body, he just stood under the hot water, letting it caress his skin, flowing down and relaxing all his tense muscles. It also seemed that the water helped out the healing process because when he finally got ready to get out he quickly checked his wounds again and was amazed to see them fully healed.

'Well that's good…and not so good. Shit maybe Ryuzaki will forget about bandaging me up? Ha unlikely, I have a better shot of seeing Ryuk in a pink tutu and man that image just scarred me for life, yuck!'

Raito turned off the water and slowly opened the glass door. The bathroom was all foggy and was so stuffy that Raito was tempted to open the door a little to let some of the steam out. But no, he needed the cover, if the camera showed that he was almost 100 percent better, minus the bruises, there will be a whole lot of questions directed at him, and sadly the answers weren't that easy to give back.

Raito quickly grabbed a large fluffy white towel off the rack and wrapped it around himself, all the way up to his stomach area. It was big enough that it covered him all the way to a bit past his knees when it was wrapped so high. Raito also grabbed a small towel and put it around his neck, he would need it to dry his hair later, right now he wanted cloths.

Before leaving Raito walked back to the mirror and wiped a small spot so he could see himself. He studied his bruised, gaunt face, to many days spent in that cell had thinned out his face, his eyes were blood-shot and puffy both from the crying fits he had in the last 24 hours and also from lack of sleep. There were subtle black circles ringing his eyes, not as dark or large as Ryuzaki's panda eyes but still they were visible enough that Raito felt distressed. To him at this moment he couldn't remember seeing himself this ugly before.

'God can I be anymore of a drama queen? So I'm sleep deprived and beat-up, it doesn't make me ugly, I just need some sleep and food and a few days to heal up these bruises then I'll be right back to my usual princely appearance and wow…should I say narcissist princess much? Geez, L was right I am narcissistic.'

Raito just shook his head and then turned around to reach for the door knob, before leaving though he looked into the corner that he knew the camera was in and gave it a vicious smile, showing that he knew that L was watching him.

Raito opened the door and strolled out, it seemed that the shower had helped him not only with his wounds but it helped restore his more aggressive nature. Raito didn't forget though to pretend that his leg and stomach still bothered him. It wouldn't do for Ryuzaki to get to suspicious of why his wounds suddenly stopped hurting.

Raito returned to the bedroom and was surprised to see that Watari had already left; he didn't think he took _that_ long in the shower.

Ryuzaki was sitting on the bed; he was already cleaned up some and had some bandages wrapped around his head, most likely for his earlier head injury that Raito had dealt him in the white room, he also had a few gauze band-aids on his face and Raito knew that L most likely had a few more in other places, he was eating a slice of what seemed to be another strawberry cream pie and was in a whole new outfit, one that Raito had never seen before and that stuck him speechless and motionless at the same time, the outfit was… chibified strawberry pajamas.

"…"

Raito just stood there in the doorway staring; he couldn't take his eyes off the…most endearing, adorable, sight he had ever seen.

Ryuzaki didn't seem aware yet of his presences because he hadn't looked up when Raito had walked through the doorway, he was just happily devouring his treat.

Raito had to take a firm grasp on his will and hormones. He wanted nothing more then to go over there and kiss Ryuzaki senseless right now. But no damn it, they needed sleep to get through tomorrow, Raito had a feeling that a lot was going to happen, and not just about his dad going psycho chainsaw massacre on Ryuzaki's hide either, but something else was going to happen. Something that would most likely change everything all over again, and Raito couldn't tell if it would be a good change for the better or a really terrible change that could destroy any chance he had to win over L Lawliet's heart.

--

(Should I end it here…)

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-

-

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(…no not yet.)

--

After about five more minutes of just plain ogling Ryuzaki in his all too glorious cuteness, Raito finally decided to make his presence known.

"Wow I must say Ryuzaki…I couldn't think of anything more fitting for you to wear for sleepwear."

L who had just forked a mouthful of cake developed a deer in the headlights expression; it was either that or a child found with his hand in the cookie jar. It was quite endearing and funny at the same time. Especially with his cheeks puffed out some from the large cake piece that he had just stuffed into his mouth.

Raito let out a low laugh and walked over to the big sitting chair that held some black silk pajamas that he knew that Watari had left for him. His back was turned so he didn't see Ryuzaki set down his cake on the bedside counter and get up and start to move towards him with some gauze and bandages in hand.

"Raito-kun shouldn't we take care of your injuries first before you get dressed?"

Raito was able to not give any outward appearance of his now panicked state.

'Shit-darn-goddamnit, how can I forget something like that so soon? Damn Ryuzaki and his cute chibi strawberries pajamas of doom. Oh well I guess I might have to be a bit harsh to him right now, but there isn't anything else that I could think of to do. Sorry L, hope that this won't hurt you to much.'

Raito made sure his face expressed both irritation and resentment before turning around, it broke his heart to do this, but L wasn't ready for the truth yet, and Raito couldn't let him see that there were no wounds to treat anymore. To be truthful it was mostly Raito that wasn't quite ready yet, to admit that he was now something other then human.

L had frozen a few feet from Raito after seeing Raito's face. Uncertainty crossed his face before it went back to his blank detective stare.

It hurt Raito a lot more then he was willing to admit at seeing any progress that he had made with L pushed back because of him. But what was necessary was necessary.

"Damn it L I can take care of myself, I don't need you hovering over me like I'm fucking 3 years old! If I need to bandage myself I'll do it myself! So stop acting like a mother hen already and leave me alone!"

Every word was like a knife to his heart and he didn't doubt that it was the same for Ryuzaki, Raito tried to keep what he was saying from being to cruel but he doubted that it worked. Not matter what he said he was still yelling at Ryuzaki who had only wanted to help.

Ryuzaki's expression became duller with each word. Finally after Raito was done expressing his false anger at the detective L spoke.

"I apologize Yagami-san if I gave off the impression of being a mother hen, I just wouldn't want to have my main suspect to die or anything before I convict him. It would have taken some of my creditability away if you get what I mean."

'Oh major ouch.'

Raito couldn't help the flinch he gave off when L spoke. Raito decided to try to salvage what he could; he didn't want things to get _that_ bad between them.

"I'm sorry Ryuzaki; I'm just tired and also very stressed over what could have happened to my family tonight, I was taking my frustration out on you when you don't deserve it. I'm truly sorry."

Raito became scared that it wasn't enough to apologize, because L's expression didn't change from the dull expression it had taken. L just nodded his head at Raito, who didn't know if that meant that L had accepted his apology and forgave him or just acknowledged that Raito had apologized.

L lightly tossed the roll of bandages at Raito who caught them unsteady before he moved back to the bed and sat in his usual curled up position, only it seemed to be even more defensive then usual. What worried Raito most of all was L was now ignoring the strawberry cake right next to him like it wasn't even there. Now Raito really felt like a bastard.

L had turned his head to the side so Raito quickly turned around again and rolled some gauze around were his leg wound had once been, it was best to keep up appearances at least, after that he took off his large towel and put on the bottom part of his pajamas on, marveling at how nice the silk felt on his skin. He then quickly wrapped some more gauze around his stomach area, not as much as he had put on his leg but still enough to cover the now healed skin. He quickly toweled off his hair so it was no longer dripping wet, and set the smaller towel right on top of the bigger one. His hair was still damp but he didn't feel like blow drying it right now. Fuzzy morning hair be damned.

Raito looked at the pajama top and made a decision. He turned back around without putting it on and walked over to the bed. He threw the top back on the chair. Before getting into bed though he made a quick detour to the food cart and grabbed a banana from the fruit bowel and quickly devoured it, after he was done with that, he decided that he would just have a large breakfast in the morning to satisfy his hungry, he was too tired to eat anything else. He then got into bed half-naked.

Ryuzaki still had his head turned around the opposite way so he didn't see what Raito was doing at all.

Raito gave a sigh as he watched L sulk for a while longer, Watari must have earlier turned off the overhead light and switched the lamp on right beside L's side of the bed. It gave the room a slight low light feeling, it was also kind of comfortable, Raito could remember when they had been handcuffed before that he had to learn to sleep with that light on because Ryuzaki had almost always stayed up on his laptop into the earlier hours of the morning. After a while Raito had even come to enjoy the slight light that lured him to sleep along with the sound of tapping keys.

Raito got under the covers but left his chest bare, he was sitting up with his back to the headrest and just sat there staring at the sulking L.

'What can I do to fix this? I don't know, he's even ignoring cake! Strawberry cake to! I must have really upset him, he must be so confused right now, with all that is happening and then the thing between us…we are both hot and cold all over, we fight and yell and then we end up having a passionate make-out session…hmmm you know that might just work. But damn I feel like I'm going to pass out soon…oh well I might as well try it.'

Raito stealthy moved over towards the sulking L and when he was only a few inches away did he speak in a low sultry voice.

"I really am sorry Lawliet, I didn't mean to say those cruel things to you and I know that you really just wanted to help me. If there is anything I could do to make you forgive me…please tell me, I would be all to willing to do it, anything at all Lawliet."

Raito briefly wondered if L's head got wiped lashed after he swiftly turned his head to look at Raito with a look of shock and disbelief. Raito was shocked to see that L's eyes were faintly wet, like he could cry but didn't, Raito didn't give him a chance to turn back around and sulk again, or even to get mad at Raito for some reason or another.

The second that Raito saw Ryuzaki's eyes he knew what to do. Before L could protest or do anything Raito pounce on top of him and kissed him as hard as he could.

Raito was trying to convert how sorry he was for what he had said and done, he let his tongue and teeth nip and lick at the closed lips begging for entrance. After a few seconds in which Ryuzaki did nothing at all, Raito let out a low whine of distress. It seemed that he was to late…

Right when Raito started to pull away he was stopped by a sudden hand that grabbed the back of his head and pushed him back down, Raito gave a muffled cry of surprise, but also of delight, it seemed that Ryuzaki had forgiven him, either that or he just wanted to kiss Raito. Raito at that moment didn't really care which one it was either.

Ryuzaki quickly took over the kiss and plundered Raito's mouth with his tongue, moving it in and out in a parody of something much more intimate, using his tongue and teeth to pull Raito's tongue into his own mouth, sucking on it with ferocity…there was nothing gently or kind about this kiss. It was rough and hard and exactly what both Ryuzaki and Raito needed.

After a few minutes of scorching wet open-mouth kisses which had both of them squirming around in arousal and begging for oxygen, Raito was finally released from the unyielding hand that had been holding him down. Raito sat up and took a deep breath of air, he had not been expecting that at all, he had thought that maybe a small sweet kiss would have been enough to make Ryuzaki forgive him, he had defiantly not been expecting to be pulled into another one of Ryuzaki's searing kisses, especially with Ryuzaki being mad at him and all.

Raito finally took stock of his surroundings, he was now sprawled right on top of Ryuzaki, who had moved from his usual crouched and was spread out on the bed, Ryuzaki seemed comfortable with having Raito on top of him so Raito wasn't going to complain, not one bit.

"So I guess…that means that I'm forgiven?"

Raito was more then slightly out of breath, so he had to pant out his question.

Ryuzaki just have him a heated look before suddenly smirking.

"I had already forgiven Raito-kun the first time he apologize, I was just curious on how you would react to me sulking and pretending to be mad at you. I've got to say if that is the apology that I will be expecting from now on for every time I get mad at you, I'll just have to get pissed at you more often."

Raito was speechless.

'Tha-that manipulative little-argh I really had thought that he had been angry at me, and he was just playing? That little shit, I'm just going to have to spank him or something for that little display! Even though those kisses were hot…ok they were more then hot, I feel like I need to take a cold shower or something to cool down. Geez, only you Lawliet can get away with something like this and not have me throttle you in your sleep.'

Raito just let out a sigh of fondness and weariness.

"Only you L would come up with something that devious and still make it seem like your nothing but an innocent victim."

"I don't know what you mean Raito-kun, and as much as I would love to continue we really do need to get some sleep, tomorrow promises to be quite the big day."

Raito gave a snort and rolled over off of Ryuzaki, he imminently missed the warmth.

"More like Doom's Day Ryuzaki."

Ryuzaki just waved his hand in a dismissing manner; he then reached up to turn off the lamp light, plunging the room into darkness.

"You are such a positive thinker Raito-kun, now I know how tired you are so go to sleep."

"Real funny Ryuzaki and sweet dreams to you to."

Raito settled down into the bed, he could feel the bed shifting as L also moved around to get into a comfortable position to sleep.

After a few minutes of tossing and turning Raito was about to give up on sleeping altogether, for some reason he just couldn't get comfortable enough to fall asleep, also he was cold. He suddenly wished that he had put on his pajama top on instead of leaving it on the chair.

Raito was startled out of his thoughts when he suddenly felt a warm pair of arms wrap around him. He was suddenly spooned against Ryuzaki; his whole bare back was pressing into Ryuzaki's chest.

He was cocooned into Ryuzaki's warm embrace.

"Shhh Raito-kun, please relax and try to get some sleep, I'm right here and will be here in the morning."

Raito knew that that sentence held a lot more meaning in it then just that Ryuzaki would still be in bed in the morning, that sentence said that no matter what happened tomorrow that he would stand by Raito.

Raito didn't care if that meant that Ryuzaki was admitting that he cared about Raito or if he had meant that he would be hiding behind Raito when Raito's father came charging for his blood. All Raito knew was that Ryuzaki was holding him and he had never felt safer then he did at this moment.

Without even realizing it Raito fell into the first dreamless peaceful sleep that he had in a long time.

What would come tomorrow would come and Raito would face it head-on and he could only pray that Ryuzaki would be willing to stand beside him.

--

**Edited- 12/11/08**

Soo…I know I said that the Kira case would start again on this chapter but…darn it! D; oh well it will start on the next chapter (if I have anything to say about it!) I'm not to sure what to think about this chapter…hmmm I know I will love the next one at least. A lot of plot twists will be in that chapter HOPEFULLY! So please review and tell me what you think about this chapter…was it ok? Was it to OOC? What do you think about Raito's and L's attitudes and actions in this chapter and how about Zaki's quick hello and goodbye? He will be back into the story again soon enough, not sure when though, I just wanted to him to do a quick peek in and out so that none of you forget about him! XD

Please review and if you have any questions please ask me! I will try to answer them as best as I can!

**Review Please I beg of you!!**


	13. Chapter 13

Warnings for the next three chapters: Fluffiness to the extreme, LOTS of humor, major angst (Ya, you all wonder how I'll make that work XP), MAJOR PLOT TWISTS!

Thank you everyone for your wonderful reviews! They brighten up my days of gloominess when I'm feeling down. I only have to click a button to know that there are people out there that enjoy my work, TvT thank you…here are my replays:

Chibi Tsuki Hikari, - hehe I know I have already replayed to you about the mpreg(sequel darling in the sequel) CX but I still want to say something…I luvs you /v/ XD heheh but really thank you so much for reviewing and loving my story! XD

Jesus-of-suburbia2o2o, - hehe I try to write each update in one go (lots of hours sitting in one position Hurts!) so thank you for the props, I like to make sure I update at least once a week (it's been a week and a few days since my last update, sorry ;.;) so that people won't think I died or something if I haven't updated regularly. I also love Zaki! XD he will be more frequently revealed in this story soon, as soon as I figure out what I'm going to do with him! XP heheh, about the pj's I know that it may be a bit overused but that's only because it's so darn cute! XD I thought of having the pj's have Hello Panda on them instead (you know, the Japanese candy, chocolate cookie, they are cute and tasty!) but I believed that I was already over using the pandas in this story…maybe I should have? O.o but don't worry I'm not upset and I won't eat you or anything :D you were truthful about your thoughts on that subject, so thank you for that. As long as no one outrights says my story sucks or something like that I don't mind contractive criticism XD eep! I'm sorry but we won't get to the pissed off Yagami-san till the next chapter, sumimasen (sorry)** 'bows in apology'**

Dectecive1412, - hehe of course I loved the amv (what does that mean anyway? o.0) I bragged about it to all my friends and family XD hehe yes I did see the video with Ryuk in the pink tutu…it scarred me TxT

Dark Oracle, - Well you have to remember that Raito was still in a lot of pain from his other injures at the time, so the hicky throbbing wouldn't have really registered because of his other injures at the time. Of course L's possessive! He doesn't like to share his toys (hehe) with anyone and so he stakes his clam on Raito as a show that Raito belongs to him and no one else…o.0 hehe law of the jungle XD I'm trying to get to the Kira case part but…damn it! So much stuff keeps happening! (Pulls hair in frustration) The Kira case should pick up in a few more chapters, since I have to space this chapter into 3 or so more, because it got to big again… (pouts) sorry…ah Zaki…I luvs him XD he will play a big part in the story later, much, much later, but it will be a very important role, I just wanted him to reappear for a bit so people won't forget about him! XP

Krrye, - Yea! Feedback! lol, thanks! Yep that was my first time writing lime XP it was hard but really fun to write. Yes I like there to as much description as possible. It makes the story have more depth and it's much more fun to read too XD

Krrye25, - umm are you the same krrye as the one before? Oh well doesn't matter XD Yea the strawberry pjs were so adorable! CX don't worry I will keep updating, Misa and Rem and the current Kira will all make important appearances later in the story (this story is just going to be so long XD)

Sueona, - hehe thank you! I'm happy that you think my story is great! Yes I also like how my Raito is, he's uncertain of his repentance and L but he is regretful of his past sins and wants to make up for them, he is scared of L's reaction to finding out the truth…but unfortunately for him, I'm thinking I should move the story towards that direction (spoiler XP) heheh

Sleeplesswriter, - you still scare me. ox0 (hugs L plushy in defense) but thank you for loving my story…

Black-Dranzer-1119, - hehe thank you, L is just really to cute for words!

Yingyangathena, - hehe I like having depth in my story, but I just can't help but put the smut in it to keep it interesting and…smutty, XD its fun to make the DN boys make out! XD…It was weird? ;-;

Vanity, - Yea I'm loved!! XD hehe yep the pj's were just so cute I couldn't help but add them when the idea came to me, eep! It's been a while since I updated I hope you didn't die! DON'T DIE!! LOL, I'm spreading the plot twists into 3 or so chapters instead of having all of it within this chapter, so the next few chapters should be interesting to say the least. I luvs you to. /w/

Dott55, - thanks! I'm glad you enjoyed the lime!

Blood-fire-dragon, - yea, my story is going all over all the categories, angst, fluff, comedy…I could go on but I wont :P, yea poor L but he got his revenge kind of, XD hehe the one-shot is turning out to be more of a romance then a smut fic…0w0 oh well…thanks for the review! LUVS YOU FOREVER!! Hehe sorry I've had 2 AMV energy drinks in the span of 3 hours and it's almost midnight…XDDDDDD

Kyorose, - hehe I'm glad you like my last chapter, I'm sorry you won't know anyone's reaction till the next chapter…sorry ;.; I'm going to try to get that chapter up as soon as possible. I also liked how Raito just kissed L like that…it was cute! XD

Lady Vampyre Nefertiri, - I know Raito was kind of a jerk wasn't he? Well he's back to being a bit unsecure in this chapter! CX not as much as he was before but…eep yet again I must apologize about how you won't be able to see Yagami-san's reaction till the next chapter, I just wanted to post this chapter so bad…sorry.

Baow, - hehe wow, ok I'll hold off on making any other stories till I finish this one, I'm still going to do the special Halloween one-shot though ;p

Pouf, - hehe I'm glad you enjoyed L and his pjs XD ohh your question shall be answered in this chapter XDDD

Jack, - YES I know that L's real name is L Lawliet, I know that L is his first name, I have the book 'How to Read 13' BUT I want to pretend in this that his name is Lawliet, kind of like you may call someone named Mary Jane, Jane instead of saying Mary Jane all the time, or call that person Mary instead, so I will be calling Ryuzaki both L and Lawliet equaling in this story as they are both his real names. Remember this is a fanfic, so what I say goes! XD I hope I don't sound mean or anything, I'm just explaining why I use Lawliet like it's his first name instead of his last name, it's just for my story. I know the truth so don't worry about that. Thank you for reading my story and reviewing.

May or Yesterday, - thanks I'm glad you think my story's cute!

G-Wing Gurl, - yep! Watari and Raito gang up on poor L! It's so funny to picture! XD about Zaki, that's why I had him quickly come back for a moment in the last chapter, so people wouldn't wonder or forget about him, for now he will be popping in and out of the story, later on he will play a bigger more important role. For now, he's taking a nap in the back of Raito's mind XD

I'M SO FREAKING SORRY!! I know that I haven't updated as fast as I have in the past! But real life's been a real bitch to me lately and I haven't had the time lately to even think about my fic-baby!

I know I promised that you would see Raito's daddy's reaction in this chapter but I wanted to post the next chapter so bad(It's been way to long since my last chapter) I PROMISE it will be in the next chapter, PROMISE, PROMISE, PROMISE! Also the plot twists will be coming in the next couple of chapters. I wanted to have them all happen in this chapter but I'm going to space them out within the next couple chapters instead, they should be coming soon.

I'm working on the next chapter right now so you won't have to wait long to see what's going to happen. I think that's only fair since all of it should have been in this chapter but if I did that, then this chapter would have been at LEAST 50 to 60 pages long. That's WAYYYYY to long, but don't worry I will have the next part up soon!

This is like PART 1 of 3 of the plot twists that should have been all in one chapter. 0w0;

There is a French phrase in this chapter; the translation will be at the end of this chapter.

--

Raito blearily opened his eyes; the first thing that he became aware of was total blackness, it took his brain about 3.4 seconds to realize that his face was stuffed into Ryuzaki's hair.

'And I haven't suffocated yet how?'

Raito moved his head a bit so that his face wasn't pressed into Ryuzaki's hair anymore. He absently noted that it still smelled like strawberries even though he was pretty sure that Ryuzaki hadn't bathed in a while.

He was startled to see that he was currently in a pretzel like situation. Currently most of his body was underneath Ryuzaki's. It seemed that sometime in the night Ryuzaki had decided that Raito made a better mattress then the bed itself.

Ryuzaki was laying sideways on top of Raito, he was in his usual curled up position with his legs drawn up. Raito looked downward at the utter cute picture L made right now, he looked like a child at the moment, it helped that his thumb was once again pressed to his lips, only this time in sleep. Raito could hear the faint snores coming from L showing that he really was asleep at the moment and not faking it. Strangely enough Raito didn't feel like he was being smothered at all, in reality the warm body that was currently on top of him felt…comfortable.

Raito tried to turn his head to the side to see the alarm clock on the night stand, unfortunately because his movement was hampered by L laying on top of his limbs he couldn't move enough to see the clock that was on the stand.

But judging by the slight lighting in the room from the window he estimated it to be around 5 am, dawn was just breaking out, late by L's standard, frequently L wanted Raito to be up by at least 4 am to begin the day even if they usually got to bed around 1 or 2 in the morning. The rest of the task force comes in around 6 am, at least his father and Aizawa did, Mogi regularly comes in around 7 am, Matsuda was always late in coming to work, not making it till 8:30 am sometimes even later then that. But since L was asleep and Raito was still tired himself he couldn't bring himself to care.

'He'll probably be mad at me if he knew I was awake and didn't wake him up, but we both need the rest…besides I like this, it makes me feel…comfortable, contented really, and those cute pjs are just too…well their just to cute! I mean really! L you may be the world's three greatest detectives, and the smartest, most beautiful, and also the most manipulative person I have ever meet! And I love you damnit! How did you do it? I want to tell you everything, I thought it would be easy to wait, that I would have the patience to wait for you to begin to love me back before I tell you everything, but I never expected it to be this hard! When I gave you that half-truth spun tale in the car it was all I could do not to sprout out the truth! I think I need to tell you soon…even if neither of us are ready I can't…I can't keep anything from you anymore. Even if you hate me, despise the ground I walk on and are disgusted by me…even if you condemn me to imprisonment for all the rest of my eternity…I'll chance it, because I just can't lie to you L Lawliet. You are my heart, my being for living…'

Raito looked downward at the still sleeping L, he let his face relax and shine with all of the love that he held for the man. He didn't care about the cameras or even if Watari walked in right now and saw Raito's open expression. Raito didn't care about anything like that; he just didn't feel like keeping his mask on any longer…at least he didn't feel like wearing it at this moment. He doubted that he would ever feel completely comfortable having his emotions on display 24/7. His mask was alike a security blanket really. It helped him coup and deal with the world around him.

Raito for some reason remembered when he had taken a French class as one of his languages in high school. He had to choose two languages for his required classes and he had chosen English and French, he didn't believe that Spanish would have gotten him anywhere, but he had brushed up a little on it, he wasn't fluent in French as he was in English but he knew enough. He had studied at least three other languages in his spare time, German, Russian, and Italian, just so that he would have a wide language range. He knew that L though knew at least 20 or more different languages. Raito wondered why he would need that many but since it was L he didn't really think that he would need a reason to know that many, it was most likely because he could that he learned them all.

He decided even though L was asleep he would express a little on how he felt about him, he was still to unsecure to tell L to his face that he was totally and completely in love with him but…maybe he could whisper it in French while he was asleep? It was the coward's way but Raito need time to think up a way to confess his feelings…and the fact that he was a monster.

Raito cringed at that. As much as he didn't want to think about it or acknowledge it but the fact remained that he was almost half shinigami. A true monster in the eyes of humans, hell he was a monster in his own eyes.

Raito decided not to think about it, he just need to express a little bit on how he felt about L out loud…it was like he was going to burst with all of his pent up emotions. It did help some when L and he…made out and all but it wasn't enough to satisfy his body, he needed to say something. Even if L couldn't hear him it would satisfy him for now to say something out loud, and hopefully it will give him time to think on a plan of action for later.

Raito bent down so that he's mouth was only a few centimeters away from L's ear, his hot breath puffed out a little and it must have tickled a bit because L started to squirm a little. Realizing that L could wake up any second now Raito spoke in a hushed whisper.

"_Mon aimé, je t'aime" _

He moved back a ways and waited with baited breath to see if L woke up or not. He was slightly disappointed and relieved at the same time when L just shifted some and continued on snoring. He tilted his head back till he was staring at the ceiling, his free hand absentmindly started to comb through L's hair, petting it here and there. L started to softly purr under his attentions.

'Oh well at least I said it out loud, now I guess I should really wake him up and start on the Kira case…hmmm I wonder if things will be different concerning the case this time? Everything else seems to be changing from the original time-line so maybe the third Kira won't be Higuchi from the Yotsuba, if that's the case…shit! That really means that I'll be flying blind, it doesn't matter that I've lived all this once already, things are different this time and constantly changing. So I guess I'll just have to wing it through like I don't know anything, at least it seems the same people are here…hmmm if the third Kira isn't Higuchi I wonder who it will be? They are already killing criminals apparently according to what L said earlier, so they are either playing being the first Kira to hid their own personal killings like the Yotsuba group did or they really do believe all that perfect world crap that I-Kira had preached about.'

Raito let out a slight sigh of frustration and decided it was time to wake L up, he didn't want to continue this trail of thought, at least not until he had more information to work with.

He looked back down and couldn't stop from jumping slightly in surprise when he saw unfathomable grey eyes staring back at him with an unreadable emotion swirling in them.

"O-oh L good morning I was just going to wake you…how long have you been up?"

L just stared at him unblinkingly for what seemed to be forever, when in reality was only about 30 seconds, but it was 29 seconds longer then it should have been.

Finally L slowly blinked once, twice then seemed to come to life.

"Good morning Raito-kun, I haven't been up long…just enough."

With that cryptic statement that left Raito completely baffled, L finally started to get up. Raito let his hand fall from L's hair to lay beside him.

L leaning up by planting his hands on Raito's chest, Raito was only just becoming aware of the awkwardness of their position.

When L started to move and squirm on top of him Raito became aware of something that was both humiliating and embarrassing.

Morning wood.

What L said next did _not_ help one bit.

"It would seem that my close approximation with Raito-kun has made him, how do I say this? _Stand up to attention._"

L tilted his head to the side with a fake thoughtful expression.

"It would seem that I was wrong with what I said yesterday about Raito-kun's ability to _get it up,_ it would seem that Raito-kun actually likes to _get up_ a lot, how many times now has Raito-kun gotten hard because of me? Two? Three? Are there anymore times that this has happen previously because of me that I'm not aware of Raito-kun? Please tell me, I'm all ears."

Raito gaped at L's smirking face above him in disbelief.

'T-that jerk!'

Raito suddenly pushed L off of him completely. Even though he was kind of pissed off at the moment at L he still made sure not to push L to hard, only so that he fell back onto the bed instead of falling off and hitting the floor, which he would have if Raito had pushed harder.

L who had fallen on his back on the bed stared wide eyed at Raito for a second before he started to laugh at Raito's mortified and red face.

"Shut up L it's not funny!"

Raito didn't let it show but his anger had melted away the moment he heard L start to laugh freely, he didn't even care that it was at his expense right now.

"I a-apologize Raito-kun, your right it's not funny."

L was able to finally stop laughing and let a serious expression over take his face, it lasted maybe 10 seconds before they both looked at each other then simultaneously looked back down at Raito's current _problem. _

They both broke out in hysterical laughter not a second later.

Raito didn't know why he was laughing, but it seemed like the laughter was to infectionous not to break out giggling.

After a few minutes of laughing they both were able to calm down enough to just lay there on the bed panting for breath.

Raito found to his profound relief that while he had been laughing his erection had gone away.

'Not that getting turned on by L is a bad thing but we really don't need that kind of distraction right now. First we need to deal with the matter of my father, then the Kira case. I need to go over the figures and evidence that has piled up in while I was incarcerated, and doesn't that make me sound like a common criminal. Well anyway I need to see what's different with this current Kira's killing pattern if anything has changed at all. Also I really hope Sayu striped father this morning of any sharp objects at least, I remember what happened the last time a guy showed interest in me, we had to use some of my collage fund to pay the guy's hospital bill after he sued dad for trying to light him on fire. And _that_ guy only told me that I was very sexy and would have liked to have my phone number, which I guess wasn't that bad but he did it within my father's hearing distance. And Ryuzaki said that Sayu would be his future sister-in-law…he was basically saying that he was going to marry me…not that I would object, in fact I might just faint with happiness if that happened…either that or laugh myself silly if Ryuzaki got down on his knees and asked me to marry him…oh god that would be hilarious and so utterly cute and sexy...I need to stop this trail of thought now. '

Raito let out a sigh and looked at the still panting Ryuzaki.

"We should get ready and get downstairs. It's already late and I'm sure the rest of the task force will be here shortly."

Ryuzaki slowly sat up and got of the bed, standing beside the bed that Raito was still in, he nodded his head in agreement.

"Raito-kun is right, it is quite a lot later then I would have liked it to be, I wonder why Watari didn't wake us up? He knows that I don't like oversleeping."

"Oversleeping? How about sleeping in general you insomniac panda bear."

Ryuzaki just shot him a dirty look before shuffling over to the small table he had placed his disabled gun and the handcuffs the night before. Raito saw that a smirk crossed Ryuzaki's face as he caught sight of his stuffed bear counter part, which Raito had nestled right in between L's rather sadistic toys.

Raito shook his head in bemusement and got out of bed himself. He gave a slightly lazy stretch but froze with his arms stretch out when Ryuzaki's voice shattered the silence.

"Oh yes Raito-kun how are your injures? You seem to be feeling ok…if I didn't know that you were attacked or see you bleeding yesterday I would say that you were perfectly in good health. What with all those bruises seemingly to vanishing overnight. "

'Shit, shit, shit! I can't believe I forgot about that! Gods how stupid can I really be?! How the hell do I explain my moving around like I'm in prefect health? Which I am, I can feel that my body is all healed up…damn I don't need this right now!'

Raito hid his snarled at his stupidly shown through. He would have to try to deflect Ryuzaki's questions and accusations right now and for as long as he could. At least until Ryuzaki got too pissed off at him and forced the issue…actually he would prefer it that way. To have the choice taken away from him by L, it would make things easier for him, internally at least. It may have seemed like the cowards way out but he couldn't help that.

Raito carefully made sure to place a mask of confusion and surprise on before turning back around to face Ryuzaki. He expected to see accusation and betrayal and suspicion and all sorts of negative emotions on Ryuzaki's face, what he did not expect was to see simple curiosity shine on L's face. That was it, nothing else.

Raito almost lost his mask right then and there. It seemed that whatever Ryuzaki was thinking about, Raito lying and plotting something sinister was _not_ it.

"Umm…"

Raito looked down at himself to see exactly what Ryuzaki meant about his bruises being gone. He couldn't snuff the gasp of shock as he saw that Ryuzaki was indeed right.

Any wound that he had be it cut or bruise, was gone.

He knew in his head that he had been healed, he had _felt_ it. But it was an entirely different experience to see it with his own eyes.

Raito looked back up to see Ryuzaki still looking at him, waiting for something, anything, waiting for Raito to either lie, or tell the truth.

Raito decided to continue with his half-truths for now. In reality it really was the truth, kind of.

"I don't know how my bruises are gone Ryuzaki…"

Ryuzaki had an unreadable expression on his face. He gave a half nod and asked.

"How about Raito-kun's other injuries? Have they also healed as well?"

Raito decided to keep going, it seemed that Ryuzaki wasn't mad at him or anything at the moment, besides Ryuzaki will have to sooner or later know about Raito's recovery abilities, even if he didn't need to know about the rest of it yet.

"Well let's take a look see…"

With that Raito started to untwine the bandages around his stomach, very much aware of L's heavy gaze on him.

When he finally let the last of the gauze fall from his hand to the floor, he really took a look at where he had been slashed at not 12 hours ago, there was no crusted blood anywhere thanks to the shower he had earlier. He lifted his hand, vaguely noting that it was trembling slightly, too where unblemished skin showed on his stomach. Except for a faint white line of new skin, you would have never known that he was injured.

He traced the area, feeling for himself the utter smoothness of his skin. He didn't even really have to look to know that the injury on his leg was completely healed as well, most likely it was even further in the healed process then his stomach wound. He remembered seeing that it had healed faster because it was the more serious wound.

"Fascinating, very fascinating Raito-kun, did you know you would heal like this? Or are you really as surprised as your face suggests? "

Raito froze, in his wonder at seeing his healed body he had forgotten completely that L was also seeing what he was seeing.

Raito looked up from his stomach and looked at L. He bit back a yell of surprise as he came almost nose to nose with L. It seemed that while he had preoccupied Ryuzaki had moved back to Raito, most likely to get a better look at the wounds, or what was left of them anyway, which wasn't much.

Raito took a deep breath and imminently regretted it as the scent of strawberries assaulted his senses.

Raito managed to control himself from jumping L and kissing him senseless right then, it seemed that he had found his bane; the scent of L was enough for him to want to forget everything else. Forget his responsibilities, forget his plans, and forget his convictions. Forget about the Kira and his redemption and everything else. So that it would just be L and him, nothing else would matter but them.

It was dangerous.

'I can't…not yet, I have too much to do and deal with…but god this is so hard. How L? How did you get someone like me to love you so much? I was such a selfish and terrible person, but yet you are the most important person in my life…'

Raito let his thoughts trail off, it was better not to focus too much on the how and whys of L. It would just give him a headache and make him run around in circles like a dog chasing after its own tail. He would never catch it just like Raito will never know everything about his love.

"I _am_ surprised Ryuzaki…last night I thought that my wounds looked a lot better then I thought they would be but…I just summed it up as me over exaggerating my wounds to myself, that's why I didn't say anything to you and why I may have been a little hesitant, ok a lot hesitant of you seeing my wounds last night. That's also partially why I kind of blew up at you. I would like to apologize for that again even though you have forgiven me…still I can't help but feel like a real bastard for what I said to you."

Ryuzaki was looking straight at Raito's face, his eye's large and unblinking. When Raito finished speaking, L finally blinked and let a small smile cross his face.

"I understand why Raito-kun would be hesitant at confiding in me about his phenomenon healing. Especially added with his current visions…you were afraid that I would see it as proof of you being Kira right?"

Raito didn't know it then, but that was how he had been feeling. At least on a subconsciously level, he had been afraid that L would start to accuse him of being Kira. He didn't want to lose the sudden intimacy that they now had between them.

Raito nodded carefulness, showing that he was agreeing with Ryuzaki's theory.

Ryuzaki moved slightly back, sighing in expiration and closing his eyes. He then opened them back up and moved his gaze from Raito's confused and slightly frightened expression to Raito's stomach where his hand was still resting lightly on top of where he had once been wounded.

Raito was shocked when he saw Ryuzaki lifted his own hand and placed it on top of Raito's own hand, so that both of them were covering Raito's stomach, he then twirled both of their hands together, clasping Raito's hand tightly into his own.

Raito lifted his gaze which had fallen onto their clasped hands, he felt shocked, no not shocked he was down right perplexed by the silent message that L Lawliet had just conversed to him right now with that diminutive yet colossal gesture.

Raito looked into Ryuzaki's face which shown with patience and understanding. There were still questions, and a lot of unanswered answers that needed to be addressed, there were a lot of unknowns and dangers on the path that lay before them. But none of that mattered right now, Raito couldn't have felt more grateful right now, Ryuzaki was projecting all of the feelings he was feeling without letting the unnecessary words cloud between them up right now. It wasn't fair to Ryuzaki or Raito but it was enough for now. Ryuzaki was saying that he would wait, wait till Raito felt he was ready to tell L everything. Be it something terrible as Raito being Kira or something wonderful…

L Lawliet would wait for Yagami Raito.

--

Raito didn't know how long they stood like that, with both of them still in their pajamas, Raito with his chest bare and them standing so close with their hands clasped and resting on Raito's stomach. Just standing there staring into each others eyes and enjoying the moment of comfortable silence that had descended between them. But the moment was broken when they both heard a polite cough sound by the door.

They moved away from each other automatically as soon as they heard it, they both turned towards the door where Watari stood trying to keep the amusement from his face and failing.

"Well boys it's about 6:30 and Yagami-san is already downstairs, if you want to get the enviable explosion done with you should probably get downstairs soon. If you let Yagami-san stew too much by himself and give him time to wonder why you are both late I can't even begin to imagine the fireworks."

With that said Watari walked inside and started too ruffled through the drawers pulling out clothing for both of his frozen chargers.

Raito shook himself out of his dazed state. It would seem that Watari was very adaptable; he seemed to no longer be surprised or upset with L's and Raito's new found intimacy. If Raito didn't know any better he would say that Watari approved of it and was having fun embarrassing them.

"It would seem that Yagami-kun would no longer require any sort of medical assistance."

'Shit.'

Raito had forgotten that his chest was still bare and that his wounds were gone, showing everyone who saw him that he was now healed. Unnaturally so.

"Umm…yes I no longer seem to need anything…Watari-san…"

Watari shook his head as Raito tried to explain himself, Raito didn't know what he would say to him, if he couldn't explain himself to Ryuzaki it was even harder to explain to Watari.

But it seemed that Watari didn't require any sort of explanation.

"If Ryuzaki seems to have no cause for alarm then neither do I Yagami-kun."

Raito was once again shocked into silence, it would seem that Watari was a lot more loyal then he had first expected. Ryuzaki who had moved towards the dresser nodded his head at Watari, who silently nodded back. It was like a private conversation was going on between them and Raito kind of felt like he was intruding a bit.

The feeling left when Ryuzaki suddenly started to strip off his bed cloths.

Raito blushed and quickly inverted his eyes. He didn't know why but he felt like it was rude to stare at Ryuzaki was he was undressing, even if they had kissed.

Raito gave a start as Watari suddenly appeared in his vision and handed him some cloths to wear. Raito was glad to see that they were his own cloths too, it would have felt weird to wear some of Ryuzaki's clothing, especially if his father was downstairs gunning down for Ryuzaki's blood, he didn't want to add ammunition for his father to use.

Raito gave a grateful smile to Watari who just nodded back and moved back to help Ryuzaki with whatever he was doing at the moment.

Raito felt kind of weird undressing and dressing in front of both Ryuzaki and Watari but he knew he had to get use to doing it, he knew that before they both left, Ryuzaki and him will have to apply the handcuffs, and this time there will be no taking them off until Ryuzaki was certain that Raito was not Kira. 100 percent certain.

Raito took off the bandages around his leg also, there was no need to have it anymore, the two people that he would have wanted to hid his healed wounds from already knew about them, so he no longer had to conceal them anymore. It didn't last long, but truthfully he didn't really try to hid it, he knew that if he had really been determined to hid his healed wounds he would have found a way and Ryuzaki and Watari wouldn't have found out until he showed them himself. But that was it, he hadn't been determined, he was being careless on purpose, maybe it was that he was tired of hiding everything, maybe it was because he was weary and just wanted to show a bit of the truth of himself. He was changed he knew that, he wasn't Kira, but he wasn't the old Raito either, he was almost like a whole new person, someone who felt emotions and felt remorse, he was no longer a sociopath in any sense. Even with his shinigami powers and form, he was now more human then he had ever been before.

After he had finished putting on his cloths, which consisted of a red dress shirt and black slacks he turned back around to look back at Ryuzaki and Watari.

He gave a sigh of annoyance, as he saw that they both were having a silent stand-off, in Watari's arms was the light weight bullet proof vest, but Ryuzaki had his arms crossed and an expression that screamed 'no fucking way'.

Ryuzaki was dressed in his usual attire, a white long sleeved shirt and baggy jeans and of course no shoes of any kind.

Raito gave let out another sigh and walked over to try to help Watari fight L's eternal stubbornness. Why did they want to help him again?

--

It took almost half and hour for Watari and Raito to convince L to wear the damned vest, they also had to counter promise, L could take his gun, but it had to be empty of any ammunition. He could only use it to scare Yagami-san if he felt that he was threatened enough to justify using it.

Raito gave a near silent sigh of relief, he forgotten how completely stubborn L could be when he wanted to be.

"Ok then Watari if you can go downstairs, I believe the rest of the team should be there by now. Please inform them that we will be down momentarily and that I expect them to be working when I get down there."

Watari gave a nod and turned around and left the room. Watari wouldn't quite tell the team what L said, at least not exactly like that, but he will inform them of the arrival of both Yagami-kun and L, to at least prepare the other members of the investigation at least of the impending explosion.

Raito and Ryuzaki both watched as Watari left the room and then looked at each other in almost a synced moment. Raito couldn't help but look away in slight embarrassment. What now?

"Well Raito-kun if you would give me your hand for a moment we can leave."

Raito looked back at Ryuzaki who was now dangling the handcuff chain in front of him.

Raito walked over to Ryuzaki and stretched his hand out in front of him.

He felt himself shiver as he felt the cold metal close over his wrist. He heard the clip as Ryuzaki also locked his own wrist with the other end of the handcuff.

Raito looked at the metal ring on his own wrist then looked followed the chain towards where it ended to the other end, at L's own wrist.

They were once more connected, for the first time for Ryuzaki but it was the second time for Raito, and even if Raito had already experienced all this once, he couldn't help but feel unsecure with the closeness that the handcuffs now forced upon them.

Raito moved his gaze from Ryuzaki's cuffed hand to his face. What he saw made all the uncertainty vanish, Ryuzaki was trying to give him an encouraging smile, it wasn't the best out there, because he could tell that Ryuzaki was himself uncertain about either comforting Raito or uncertain about the situation itself, but that was what calmed Raito, Ryuzaki was showing that he also was uncertain himself but he still was trying to make Raito feel more comfortable with the situation, and that showed once again how much Ryuzaki cared.

Raito felt a smile spilt his face; he saw an answering smile speed on Ryuzaki's face in return.

"Well Ryuzaki I guess there's nothing left but to go downstairs and face whatever we need to."

Raito wasn't just talking about his father, but he felt that Ryuzaki knew that when he nodded his consent.

"Yes Raito-kun, we are quite late as it is, I believe that today will be quite the eye-opener, in more ways then one."

Raito was a little confused as to what Ryuzaki meant but let it go. Let Ryuzaki be cryptic if he wanted to be. As long as no one got shot today or died he felt that nothing could go wrong.

Raito should have known better then to chance fate by thinking that.

--

_Mon aimé, je t'aime – My beloved, I love you_

Aww how sweet, Raito said he loved L…even though L was unconscious for it…or was he? XD

I will try to have the next chapter up as soon as possible! I PROMISE!! If not you have my permission to sic Misa on me… (Shudders in fear)

I would like to thank anyone who has voted on my poll XD I'm working on a one-shot AU Halloween fic called 'A Cemetery Romance'; it should be up within the next few days along with the next part of this chapter! It's kind of a cute story really…a bit ooc maybe but it's a complete AU so it's aloud to be. XD

So what do you all think? I know it's short and there isn't as much as I promised there would be but oh well. How about Ryuzaki's reaction to seeing Raito's unnatural healing? I was going to make him angry and have the chapter angsty but…I liked this better, he's acting a lot more mature then he would have been but I like mature yet childish L, he's much more fun to write, though he will be getting quite angry at Raito soon…XD

He is suspicious people; he's just hiding it, Cunning L! But he does care for Raito and is willing to wait till Raito's ready…for now…hehe

Please Review! I will try to have the next chapter up soon so you don't have to worry about that…still I would like to see what you all think about what's happening…please?


	14. Chapter 14

Warnings for the next couple of chapters: Fluffiness to the extreme, LOTS of humor, major angst, MAJOR PLOT TWISTS!

Thank you to all who have reviewed…though I got almost 10 less then I usually do…don't you people love me anymore T.T(cries into L plushy) well anyway thank you to all who took the time and expressed their feelings or just plain nagged me to update…XD any who here are my responds:

Black-Dranzer-1119, - I'm so happy you think my last chapter was awesome and that you loved it, I hope you enjoy Raito's daddy's reaction in this chapter, I can guarantee _no one_ expected what I did for Yagami's reaction. It will be I believe quite surprising for many readers. XD which was my whole goal in doing it like that in the first place. :D

Pouf, - Are you freaking psyche or something! :x sessh you almost got my whole plot for this chapter and the next plotted for me. :p…X3 hehe anyway if you thought my last cliffy was evil well…you haven't seen evil yet till you finish this chapter! XD MUHAHAHAH (evil writer's maniacal laughter) I think all of us are hopeless fangirls, but that's ok! :D we stick together that way! YEA FANGIRLS UNITE!...;s I apologize for acting crazed(blushes) The pj's are golden and you can be sure that they will be showing up again! CX WOW! Ivy League really?! (Stares at Pouf with respect) that's so cool! Though McGill sounds good to…I hope you get into the collage you want to! (Prays to the Goddess of Yaoi and the Little Mother Goddess for your success and happiness!) XD… ;) any who…hope you did well on your SAT (I never took them…mostly because I didn't want to commit suicide which I would have when I get the score back…I don't really have much self-confidence) -shrugs- oh well. Anyway I'll let you get on with reading the chapter now. Enjoy… (Insert another evil laugh) MUHAHAHAHAH!!

Vanity, - I'm glad you like my last chapter, and I'm aware that not much happened…but you will thank me for that fluffiness when you get done with this chapter. :p heh you wanted plot twists? Well I believe I delivered a bit (or a lot XD) of that in this chapter! hehe enjoy…

Lady Vampyre Nefertiri, - Yea Raito is so cute! :3 aww, fluffiness is fun to write…but so is angst! XD One things for sure no one is going to predict what I'm going to write next…not even me! XD hehe this chapter is a prime example of that fact! Thank you for your continued reviews! I always look forward to them! :D

Blood-fire-dragon, - hiya puppy! XD, yes my last chapter was quite the fluffy wasn't it? Almost as fluffy as Sessomaru's tail!...;x…I'm so out of it…XD Watari is the BEST! Butlers Rule! They will take over the world subtly and with style…;0…I'm all for that! XD hehe I kind of took out the explosion…sorry…this is a lot more angst then usual. And not quite as funny or nice as some of my previous chapters but…well I'll shut up now and let you read and find out for yourself what I mean! XD also…_husky puppy underbelly!...XDDDDD (_inside joke if anyone else is reading this CX)

Ebil Dustbunny of Doom, - hehe I'm so glad you enjoyed my last chapter; it was very cute and fluffy, nee? CX I'm so happy your enjoying yourself…and if you don't like angst and want the cute back you sadly might have to wait a few more chapters…plot things must develop and stuff…;p eh (shrugs) hope you continue to enjoy!

Isamu-michi, - I'm really sorry? XD well ok not really because I'm to happy that your enjoying my story to make room for sorryish emotions! :D I know I need a lot of editing; I'm going to do a whole bunch of editing…after I'm done with the story. XP, I'm actually really bad at editing and spelling and such…and I have no Beta, eh, oh well. I'm sorry about Raito acting like a teenage girl, he does doesn't he? But well…I don't really know if I can change that. I can try but then it might change a few things and then my head will explode like a 3 year olds birthday piñata…:x…ok…anyway I hope you enjoy this chapter! Try to get lots of sleep! Which I should be doing right now…zzzzz

SonokoTao, - umm I know I already replayed about the typo thing so I won't repeat myself because then it makes me sound weird XD any who thank you for the review and for reading my story, hope you enjoy this chapter!

May or Yesterday, - I like French and wanted Raito or L to speak it sometime in this fic and I wanted Raito to confess his love to an unconscious L…so of course I would combined those two ideas! XD hehe enjoy Raito's daddy reaction, and brace yourself to be shocked! CX

Gemen001928, - hehe don't worry so much…well ok you might worry when you read this chapter but…I want them to have sex! That might ease your mind (or not because now you know that the author is a complete henti) they have not done the deed yet so…that must mean that neither will be dying anytime soon (or at all if I get my own way, and can wrestle this story from my muses hands) XD enjoy!

Kyrre25, - I'm so glad you liked my last chapter, I also liked L's first reaction to Raito's healing but…well he's **L **and once he has some time to really analyze what is happening to Raito…well he won't wait for long to demand answers. He's giving Raito some space right now because L knows that Raito's been through hell in the past few hours. He luvs him! CX, I love remorsing Raito! He's sooo much fun to write! And L is of course cool! He's L! XD lol, thank you for the review. ;D

ILoveGaara, - Thanks! XD I'm happy you think my story is awesome! Hehe I try to keep a steady update schedule but…well life has a way of butting in when its least wanted. X3 anyway enjoy!

Seethingkitsune, - well you didn't have to wait long XD hehe the fluffy was good and fun to write, I'm glad you liked it! XD thank you for the review, happy reading! CX

I have posted up my AU one-shot 'A Cemetery Romance' it has a lemon in it! Please read and review it! If I get good enough reviews on my experimental lemon maybe I'll feel confident to put one in this story as well later! Remember people it was only my first go! XD

Oh and just for everyone's state of mind…I LOVE HAPPYISH ENDINGS!! I may make L and Raito suffer sometimes in this story, and might take them to the brink of total angst and emotional suffering but…they will pull through anything and everything I push at them. So don't worry…this won't have a sad depressing ending…well this chapter might but the story as a whole will have a satisfying ending. K?

Part 2 of 3 of the plot twists that should have all been in one chapter!

This picks up right after the last chapter, enjoy!

---

It didn't take long for them to reach the closed outer door of the Investigation room.

Raito turned to look at Ryuzaki and if he hadn't been feeling nervous himself he would have laughed at the scared expression that Ryuzaki wore.

"It will be ok Ryuzaki, we'll just let my father vent a bit and then we'll start working on the Kira case…umm not to sound negative or anything like that but…you have the vest strapped on correctly right?"

Ryuzaki just shot him an annoyed look that caused Raito to lift his arms in mock surrender.

"Ok, ok sorry I asked, well let's get this over with; I would like to start working on proving my innocence thank you very much."

Ryuzaki just snorted, showing that he was not amused by Raito's ill timed humor.

Raito just sighed in dissatisfaction and reached out to grab the door handle to open it and start what he suspected would make world war 3 look like a tea party. He was stopped though by a pale hand suddenly overlapping his own.

Raito was startled and looked at Ryuzaki in confusion, the confusion changed to astonishment when Ryuzaki suddenly moved closer to him until their noses practically touched.

"I just wanted to make sure that Raito-kun knows that I will not take back what I said…if Yagami-san has a problem with it then that's his problem not ours."

Raito was trying to figure out what Ryuzaki meant when he was startled out of his thoughts by a pair of soft dry lips covering his own.

Raito let out a little moan of confusion but didn't fight the gentle kiss, it was different then the kisses they had shared before. While there definitely was passion in the kiss it was much more subtle, it was more of a chaste kiss, not meant to arouse but to show that Ryuzaki felt something more then lust for Raito.

Raito couldn't have felt more contented then he was right now…and more then a little turned on as well.

The kiss ended a few seconds later when Ryuzaki pulled away, it had been just a soft press of lips, but it made both of them feel more at ease and harden their resolve to get through what ever was going to happen on the other side of the door.

It was only when after they had parted that Raito felt a chill suddenly lifted the back hairs on his neck; it felt like they were being watched…

Raito turned back towards the closed door…or what had once been a closed door.

Raito stared at the wide opened door of the investigation room where every single member of the team plus Watari was standing and staring wide eyed and in Matsuda's case gapping mouth included at the now paralyzed chained pair.

'Oh you have got to be fucking kidding me…'

Raito's father was standing a few feet away from the door where he had stumped back, it didn't take a genius to figure out that it was him that had opened the door, most likely he had gotten sick of waiting for them and had decided find them himself and drag their caresses back into the room…the stare on his face expressed clearly that he had not expecting to see his son in lip-locked with his employer…the expression that was on his face. Well, Raito was sure _that_ face wouldn't have stood out in an active war room…

"Shit."

If Raito wasn't so paralyzed in alarm and fright he would have found it funny that Ryuzaki just swore, but because he didn't have that luxury he just stood there like a stone statue.

'I wonder if I have time to just grab Ryuzaki and book a plane ticket to somewhere remote…the Sari Desert sounds about right…'

But before Raito could really give that idea more attention his father finally got over his own shock, his face became more thunderous then ever and when he spoke it was like listening to your own funeral being announced.

"Well? Are you both going to just stand there all day or are you going to come in? I have a few…concerns that I would like to address to the both of you so if you would…get the hell in here right now."

Raito dimly heard Ryuzaki whimper in fear and Raito wasn't far from doing the same thing himself. It didn't matter that they both were technically adults, when Yagami demanded something in that voice it was best do as he said. Yagami hadn't been called the Grim Dog in his younger years at the police academy for nothing.

Both Raito and Ryuzaki started forward into the room, shuffling their feet like they were chained there as well as their wrists.

Before they crossed the threshold Raito couldn't help but wish that he also had worn a bullet proof vest as well.

---

"Umm Dad, it's not as bad as it seems, Ryuzaki was just-"

"Shut up Raito."

Raito gulped and shut his mouth; it seemed that his father did not want to hear any of his excuses.

After Raito and Ryuzaki had entered the room his father had just silently pointed to two simple, hard plastic chairs that were position in the middle of the room, not saying anything at all.

It would seem that he wanted both Raito and Ryuzaki to feel ultimate humiliation by not letting them sit in the nice, plush computer chairs that surrounded them. No instead of sitting in comfort they had to sit in torture chairs like two grade school boys who are got in trouble.

'He must have put them there himself, shit he even has the rest of the team standing by the wall so they won't interfere, I just hope that Watari managed to strip him of anything dangerous before letting him in here…'

Both Raito and Ryuzaki sat in the chairs quickly, not daring to protest and make things worse then they already were. They both watched anxiously as Yagami paced back and forth in front of them, a look of pure doom on his face.

Finally after a minute or two of tense silence Yagami finally stopped pacing and turned his back to them, Raito could see his back muscles tense up, he looked like a volcano about to erupt.

After another few tense seconds pasted in which Raito was considering fainting and using his shinigami form to get the hell out of there, he figured L was a big boy and could take care of himself.

Just as Raito was thinking of the best way to knock himself out and escape his father finally made a move.

Whatever anyone expected him to do or say, what he _did_ do was something no one would have predicted in a million years.

Yagami turned back around and Raito took in his purple furious face and braced himself; his plans of escape went out the window.

Yagami took a deep breath and then exploded.

"My son's been living in sin!"

"…"

Huh?

"Father? Wha-"

Yagami sent his son a look that immediately stopped any other further sounds from coming out of Raito's mouth.

"Be quite Raito, I'm-Not-Done-Speaking."

The way Yagami empathized his point scared the hell out of everyone in the room. Even Watari had a slightly fearful expression in his eyes.

Yagami started pacing again, looking back and forth at his son's face and L's. He took slight sadistic pleasure at the fearful look on their faces, and let his expression show it.

There was no doubt from which parent Raito had got his slightly twisted sadistic side from.

"I'm not talking about homosexuality, so you can stop panicking about that. I'm not going to cut you out of the family son just because you're gay. To be completely honest your mother and I had a running bet on how long it would take for you to come out of the closet…and we made this bet when you where only 6 years old…you dressing in your mother's clothing and playing with dolls and playing house with your sister kind of tipped us off."

Raito had never felt more horrified and embarrassed in his entire life then he did right now.

"DAD!"

Yagami just sent his son a smirk and continued talking as if his son hadn't interrupted.

Raito just kept staring at his father, he didn't want to know Ryuzaki's reaction to finding out his number one suspect of being Kira had dressed up as a child as a girl and use to play with dolls, and played house with his younger sister.

No, he could do without seeing Ryuzaki fall to the floor laughing at him.

"So you see Raito it's not that your gay that has…irate me, for lack of a better word, no what has me mad was that you failed to inform me and your mother about your relationship."

Raito felt his face heat up and he couldn't keep the growing horror from showing on his face.

'No, no, this can not be happening…dad is not going to give me a relationship lecture with L not sitting two inches from me…no this is all some nightmare. Yes a really, terrible, horrifying, nightmare…'

Unfortunately for Raito, reality was just about to give him a kick to his face to show it was not some horrifying nightmare that he was experiencing.

"And not only did you fail to inform us about your…relationship, you're having sex aren't you?"

"…"

Silence…then…

"WHAT!!!!"

Raito didn't care that he wasn't supposed to get up from the chair; he jumped up and stared in shock and mortification as his father just stood there calmly as if he didn't just kill his son by embarrassing him to death.

"H-how could y-you even ask me t-that!?!"

Raito felt irritated at himself for stuttering like that but…well his father had just asked him if he had sex with L in front of everyone! He had reason to stutter as he did!

His father had a strange expression on his face; it was an odd mixture of serenity and fierceness.

"I'm your father Raito; I have every right to ask you about your sexual habits. Especially if it involves sex before you get married."

_Raito wanted to die. _

'Oh please, please someone shoot me right now, forget redemption, this is not worth it!'

While Raito was staring in blank horror at his father, Yagami finally turned his attention to Ryuzaki. His smirk faded from his face, being replaced by fatherly rage.

Everyone could hear the swallow that emitted from Ryuzaki's throat.

"L…I expected better of you. Not only are you older then my son, you are also a brilliant, smart young man, and I'm honored to be working for you…but you should have known better, I thought you'd be more responsible then this…you being L should of granted you more common sense, but I guess even if you are a genius and the world's greatest detective you are still a young man with the raging hormones of a teenager. I'm deeply disappointed and ashamed of you both."

L had started to sink low into his seat when Yagami first started talking, by the time Yagami had taken a breath from lecturing him, L was on the ground in his usual sitting position, the only difference was that he was hiding behind the chair as he crouched.

'Ok that's it!'

"Dad, we've only kissed! We have not had sex for the love of Mu, I'm still a freaking virgin so would you stop lecturing us and let us all get back to work now?!"

Raito stopped and panted for breath when he finished shouting. It was only then that what he just said processed into his brain. Raito felt his face start to burn as the entire investigation team turned wide eyes on him.

'Oh me and my big mouth…'

Ryuzaki had a wide eye look too but it was filled not only with shock at Raito's outburst but curiosity. Just as Raito wondered what Ryuzaki could be curious about Ryuzaki finally spoke.

"Raito-kun is a virgin? And what is this Mu that you speak of?"

Raito was speechless as he turned his eyes on Ryuzaki, who had gotten out of behind his small chair and was now also standing.

Ryuzaki crooked his head to the side, his curiosity shown on his face, it deepened as Ryuzaki pondered more.

Raito tried to derail Ryuzaki from pondering any further on the subject. It would just be his luck if Ryuzaki started to really think hard about the different aspects that Raito had seemed to gain overnight and about his…virginness.

"L is now the time to be asking me questions? Would you please tell my father the truth? That we have not had…you know."

Ryuzaki's face morphed into a leer when Raito was speaking. Raito started to sweat a bit.

'The only thing worse then my father lecturing me about my…private matters is when L gets the idea to embarrass me.'

And what would you know; both of these things seem to coexist at the same time.

"I did not know that Raito-kun was so _shy _that he can't even say the word sex. I'm sorry if I affect his _innocent virginity_. I'm make sure to be very careful with my inten-"

"Ryuzaki! Don't you dare start that crap with me right now! Now you tell my father the truth right now or I swear that I will make your life a living hell for as long as this chain connects us!!"

Raito empathized his point by yanking on the silver chain that connected them together. Ryuzaki stumbled a bit as he was unused to the handcuffs and the small distance that it granted them. Raito, who had gone through all of this once already, remembered a few tricks that had served him the first time so that he wouldn't be overthrown by any yanking or pulling of the cuffs.

"What could you do to me Raito-kun that can make my life hell? If you mean to ignore me or to fight me then by all means, please help yourself."

Raito let out a sound that was oddly like the sound of a tea kettle whistling, when Ryuzaki pointed that out Raito snapped. He yanked the chain again, harder though, because he wanted Ryuzaki to be closer for him to land a good punch in the face.

Ryuzaki though seemed to expect it and instead of losing his balance which was Raito's intention, stepped forward gracefully and kicked Raito in the stomach. Not really hard, but enough for Raito to lose his breath.

Raito realizing that he couldn't win a physical fight right now decided to start a verbal one instead. He was confident that he could win _that_.

"How about I steal and destroy all of your cakes?! I'll make sure that not a single grain of sugar reaches those pale lips of yours Ryuzaki!"

Ryuzaki gasped and recoiled like he had been hit. His eyes widen almost impossibly wide and seemed to almost gaze over with unshed tears. His bottom lip started to tremble a bit and form a pout and he hunched even more then normal. His face adopted a heartbreaking chibi like look.

"Raito-kun would do that to me? Why? I thought I meant something to Raito-kun, but if Raito-kun can be that heartless as to try to deny me sugar then that proves that Raito-kun has no heart."

'Oh you have got to be shitting me…'

Raito knew it was a trap, it smelled like a trap, looked like a trap, he could practically taste in the air that it was a trap. But those eyes…

Raito sighed and resigned himself. Damn L and his chibiness look of doom.

"Look L…I'm sorry ok? I didn't mean it, I'm sure that Watari has some cake right now that you can have so…please stop looking at me like that."

It was like watching someone flip a switch, the sad, chibi look vanished like magic and an almost smug, self-satisfied look replaced it.

"Why thank you Raito-kun I believe I will have some cake…if only in the celebration that I made you apologize to me for no reason whatsoever."

Raito's jaw dropped as he watched L wave at Watari to bring him some of his favorite strawberry cream cake.

Finally Raito woke up from his stupor and got angry.

"You…you little shit! You tricked me!"

Ryuzaki turned back to Raito and just gave him the 'Duh' look.

Both of them seemed to have forgotten that they had an audience, Yagami had been watching them sharply through the entire argument, and seemed to come to some conclusion because he nodded to himself and stepped forward. Bringing all the attention back to him, he watched amusingly as his son and L blushed a bit at forgetting that they had an audience and that they were suppose to be in trouble.

"Well I can at least see that you care about each other and that somewhat reassures me."

Yagami sent a piercing look at Ryuzaki.

"To be truthful L, I had thought you were just playing around, using my son and toying with his heart. I know that with both of your intellect it is hard for you to speak and deal with people of lower I.Q., myself included. Wait Raito, I have something to say."

Raito who had been about to interrupt, closed his mouth with an audible click.

"Now like I was saying, L I don't know you all that well, for all I knew you could have been stringing my son along just to get laid. But the more I think about it now the less I believe that. I thought maybe you both had just become really good friends…but I guess I delusion myself to the truth. I do admit that I was angry last night when you and Sayu joked around about you joining the family, but you have to understand…I wasn't mad about the idea of you becoming one with the family, nothing would make me happier then to see my son happy, and I know my daughter and wife already have taken a shine to you…no, what got me angry was the idea that you were only joking about it. That you didn't take the idea of marrying into the family seriously, that you didn't take my son seriously. That was what made me mad. In fact this morning my daughter had to hide all my shot gun bullets from me because I wanted to shoot you in the ass. So really…you have to call her and give her thanks, because if she hadn't done that, I would be standing here with a shotgun loaded full of buckshot targeted for your ass."

Everyone was speechless by the end of Yagami's semi-rant.

Raito was especially speechless, he couldn't stop himself from glowing a bit though, his father was showing how much his son's feelings and actions mattered to him.

'Wow…I didn't know that dad really cared about me like that…so that's why he set that guy on fire, the guy hadn't been serious about me so dad got angry. Wow…I guess that means dad won't let us have sex unless we get married…damnit.'

At the moment though Raito couldn't really find it in himself to care much about that, while he didn't like the idea of his father with a shotgun aiming for L he appreciated the thought of it. Somewhat.

Ryuzaki's face had once again become his usual blank stare. Both Raito's father and L had a small stare down. It was like they where having a private discussion that no one else was aloud in on.

It kind of pissed Raito off.

'Heellloooo? Don't I get a say in this? Why don't I get the stare down to? Is it just because L's older? Or is it because he's father's employer? It can't be that dad…recognizes L as seme…no freaking way…oh god the images are coming back, fucking hell.'

Finally after a few minutes L nodded his head at his father, who just nodded back.

The tension that had been building up suddenly dissipated. Raito's father turned to look at his son's confused and lost face and gave him a small proud smile which Raito hesitantly returned.

Like an unspoken signal had been announced the rest of the team left the wall that they had been pressed back into and moved back to their own workstations.

'I'm so freaking confused right now it isn't even funny.'

L started to move over to his own workstation, causing Raito to stumble a bit as he had been lost in thought and hadn't seen L start to move. L half turned and waited a moment for Raito to regain his balance before he started moving again.

'What's with him? He has such a serious expression on his face…why?'

Raito didn't deny to himself that he was nervous and a bit paranoid about what L must be thinking about.

'Why wouldn't I be nervous, dad had basically told L that he could only start a relationship with me if he was serious…oh god, what if he isn't? Could he really be just screwing around with me…arg him screwing me...ahh, goddamnit Raito! Get your mind out of the gutter! This is important…Ryuzaki wouldn't play me like that would he? I mean…we've been through a lot together, well ok, I've been through a lot together with him in the past-future time continuum thingy…wow isn't my I.Q. dropping by the second. But even if I spent almost half a year chained to him in my last life…I know more about him now in only a few days then I knew then. Damn that's kind of sad and for some strange reason pisses me off as well."

Raito absentmindly felt himself sit into the computer chair right next to L. Who had already started analyzing data and picking through folders. It seemed that L was back into the full swing of being a detective. The detective that wanted Kira's head on a plate, served as bloody rare as it could be.

"No, I'm sure that Ryuzaki wouldn't play with me like that…but would L? I keep on forgetting that L thinks I'm Kira…and in a way he's right. Even if I got rid of the negative emotions of Kira, even when I died and been reborn, even if I vow never to get near a fucking Deathnote again…it doesn't change anything. I still have the blood of innocents on my hands. It doesn't matter, none of that matters…because it was me that had done those inexcusable things. I'm no innocent, hell I'm not even fully human anymore. Why would L care about me? Is he just using me, leading me on so that on a chance I might confess everything to him? That I'm Kira…"

Raito felt his eyes start to sting and tingle a bit, he realized almost too late that he was about to cry.

'Shit no, come on, I've got to pull myself together… I should have known though, I mean I told him I get visions of the future and he saw that I had abnormal healed myself and he didn't freak out? Any sane person would have suspected something…I bet those things just added to my percentage of being Kira…god why didn't I see it? Because I was in love? Because I'm still in fucking love? Shit, shit, shit, shit!'

Raito made sure to turn around to stare at his own computer, so Ryuzaki wouldn't become suspicious of the silent tears that flowed down Raito's face.

"Yagami-kun?"

Raito turned his head a bit to the side, Watari was standing on the opposite side of where L was sitting. So Raito didn't feel the need to hide his tears from Watari. For some reason he always felt safe around Watari. It might have been because Watari had such a grandfather air to him and even though Raito knew that Watari was an exceptional sniper and hit-man, it didn't diminish the comfort Raito felt.

'And I caused this kind man his life too…'

Raito didn't wipe his tears away, because he was sure that Ryuzaki would have felt the hand movement, so he looked at Watari with clear tear tracks lining his face.

"Yes, Watari-san? Is there something that you need of me?"

Watari had a concerned and worried look on his face, but it changed back into his polite normal mask. Raito nodded to himself, it seemed that Watari realized that he didn't want Ryuzaki to notice anything amiss.

"Nothing really Yagami-kun, I was just wondering if you were hungry, I noticed that you hadn't eaten much of the food I left you last night, if you want I can bring you some breakfast."

Raito sent Watari a semi-hidden look of gratefulness, and nodded his head.

"Yes I am quite hungry; I would appreciate it if you could bring me something to eat."

"What would you like? Something light I suspect."

"Yes please, if you can bring me some toast and some coffee that would be wonderful."

Watari nodded back, showing that he understood Raito's silent plead to not let anyone knew that he had caught Raito crying. Though before he turned around he sent Raito a piercingly look, singling that he would talk to him later about Raito's unusual show of emotions.

Raito just stopped himself from cringing and just gave Watari a quick nod to show he understood.

Satisfied Watari turned around and left the room quickly so he could bring the poor boy something to eat.

Raito sighed as he saw Watari leave the room; he pretended to yawn and subtly wiped the now drying tear tracks from his cheeks. He was mad at himself for showing so much emotion in a room filled with people. It didn't matter that no one other then Watari had saw, it was still a big whole in his mask and he was quite upset about it. He knew that he was no longer a sociopath and that he would start to feel more emotions, but he thought he would have had the strength to hide them.

It seemed to Raito that he was a lot weaker then he had thought.

---

Only about 10 minutes had passed before Raito noticed that Ryuzaki was squirming around. After Watari had left Raito decided to lock all of his emotions and thoughts about Ryuzaki deep in his mind and concentrate on the Kira case. It was important and he had to find the current Kira as soon as he could and tell Rem the plan was off…as well as burn all the Deathnotes that where on earth to ashes.

Raito tried to ignore Ryuzaki's fidgeting but as another 5 minutes passed and he still hadn't stopped Raito snapped.

"What the hell's wrong with you?! Do you have hives or something!?"

Ryuzaki just shot him a dirty look and spoke in that vacant tone that Raito hated with a passion.

"No Raito-san I do not have _hives_. But my gun is driving into my side because of that damn vest you and Watari made me wear."

Ryuzaki shot Raito a look that clearly stated that he believed it was Raito's fault that he was in such discomfort.

Raito stared in shock and disbelief before the anger set in.

"Don't you dare blame me! It's because you're emaciated that the gun is digging into you, maybe if you ate something other then sweets and sugar you'd actually have some healthy muscle so that wouldn't happen, and anyway that vest was for your own protection! We had no clue how my dad would react to your stupid comment! You heard him earlier; he would have brought a fucking shot gun and shot your scrawny ass to hell and back if my sister hadn't acted in _your_ best interest."

Raito took a deep breath and turned his burning eyes to Ryuzaki's own stunned ones.

"_So don't you dare go blaming me for your own stupid actions_."

Raito turned back around and started to type on the computer harshly.

'Shit, Fucking hell! Way to go smartass, now everyone in here will know that something's wrong with you! Great, just fucking terrific. I thought I had put a lid on my anger and pain…god I can't be around anyone; my emotions right now are so screwed up. I feel like I've been put in a blender and someone puréed my control and mind.'

Raito noticed that the room was silent and the typing of computer keys and rustling paper had stopped. He ducked his head a little more and didn't move his face from the computer screen in front of him. He knew they were all looking at him, wondering what the hell was wrong with him. He didn't want to talk to anyone though, especially about what was bothering him.

No the only one at this point that he would even consider talking to would have been Watari, and that was only just, he didn't know if Watari wouldn't take what he confessed and take it back to L. He knew that Watari's loyalty went to L first and foremost.

And the strange thing was that Raito wouldn't blame him. He understood after all, he also was loyal to L…even if L really was just tricking him into confession by pretending to care for him…it sadly didn't stop Raito from loving him despite that awful thought.

Raito heard a noise from the direction of where L sat; he turned his head ever so slightly and saw from under his bangs that L was removing the small handgun that he had slipped under his shirt. He looked at it for a moment and then called over Matsuda to take it.

Raito was kind of unsure about that…Matsuda was known for being inherently clumsily, but Raito didn't say anything about Ryuzaki's odd choice, the gun wasn't loaded after all.

---

Another 10 minutes passed in complete silence, it seemed after Raito's uncharacteristic show of anger had subdue the team into stillness. They all had started working again after about 2 or so minutes of staring at Raito's ridged back.

Raito turned slightly to look at the door when he heard it open. Watari walked in pushing a small cart filled with the promised toast and coffee, and in addition to that a small red apple was also sitting next to them.

Truthfully Raito had lost his appetite again after his outburst earlier, but since he didn't want to worry Watari nor his father he just silently gave a nod of thanks to Watari as he as handed the plate. His stomach turned slightly at the sight of the shiny apple. It brought to many bad memories to the surface, memories which where better left buried deep in his mind.

He ignored the apple and went straight for the coffee, not caring that it was boiling hot nor that it scolded his tongue…or at least it would have if Raito didn't have his shinigami healing.

Watari admonish him gently to be more careful, Raito just nodded absentmindly as he continued to drink the nectar of life.

Raito snickered to himself. Nectar of life, ha! His blood was the real Nectar of Life…

Raito stopped snickering as something nagged at him from the back of his mind…what was it?

Raito let his gaze wander around the room, his father and Aizawa and Mogi where on the far side of the room, discussion something about the case and a couple of files that were scattered around them. He turned his head and looked at where Matsuda was talking to Watari, Raito frowned when he saw that Matsuda still had Ryuzaki's gun in hand and was waving it slightly around.

'Do you know now that I think about it…even though both me and Watari told L to make sure that there was no ammunition in that gun…I don't remember him unloading it. I know that he had unloaded it last night, but I also remember him reloading it this morning before Watari and I told him to empty it…shit why can't I remember if L had emptied it or not?!'

Raito was starting to get more then a bit worried as he saw Matsuda wave the gun around a little harder this time. It seemed that Watari was unafraid of the gun being loaded, but Watari trusted L, more then he should really.

It suddenly hit Raito; he never did see Watari's life-span or his real name. Raito started to have a really bad feeling. It was just like before when he knew that something had been wrong when he had entered his parent's home as a shinigami and had felt like something was wrong…disturbed.

'It's almost like I can feel when someone's about…to…die…oh fuck no!!'

Raito was starting to feel himself panic, nothing showed on neither his face nor his posture but his mind was like being inside the middle of a hurricane…and there was no fucking eye of the storm to hide in.

'Fuck, I need to see Watari's life-span now! God damn it I need to be in my shinigami form…but I have to unconscious for that! Shit, shit I wish I had the eyes right now!'

Suddenly Raito's eyesight went black, but before he could process that he had been blinded and have time to panic he sight returned a second later…only now everything was in a haze of red.

'The Eyes…I have the eyes in my human body…what the fuck?! Shit I don't have time to panic and question the whys right now; I have to see Watari's life-span.'

Raito raised his head from the bowed position it had been in, when he had gone temporarily blind he had automatically lowered his head.

He looked up and took a glance at the numbers above Watari's head…and panicked.

_4 minute, 59 seconds_

'NO!'

Raito felt himself freeze up, he now knew that L had forgotten to unload the gun, and he knew that in a few minutes Watari would be dead from a gunshot wound.

'No I have to stop it! I have to write his name in the LifeNote!!'

Raito then remembered that he was in his human form and that his lifenote was with his shinigami form.

'SHIT! What the fuck am I going to do now-wait, I had wished to have the eyes and I got it right? So maybe if I wish to have the lifenote with me right now I can-"

Raito didn't even get to finish that thought as he felt something fall onto his head. His hands automatically went to catch whatever had fallen on top of him and when he brought his hands back down to eye level, the white prim lettering of his Lifenote looked back at him.

'Ok that's fucking cool.'

Raito didn't let anything else derail him other then that thought though. He didn't care what everyone saw anymore. He knew that Ryuzaki had seen the lifenote fall from seemingly empty air. But Raito couldn't let that faze him, his secret was about to be discovered but…_he didn't fucking care._

Raito turned his red shinigami eyes back to Watari and cursed. Out loud.

"God damn it all to fucking hell!"

_Quillsh Wammy_

_3 minutes 23 seconds_

"Shit!"

"Raito-kun what's the matter-"

Raito quickly turned to look at L who gasped in shock; Raito didn't have time to wonder why because he had already turned back to his lifenote and opened it up.

It automatically opened up to his previously written in page.

The glaring names and numbers of his love and family stood out in bright red. It seemed that his blood didn't dry out and turn the color of dried blood. No the blood was still as fresh looking as when he had written in the notebook with his life spilled blood.

Raito ignored the previously written words and picked up his shard of a pen. Ignoring Ryuzaki's demanding questions Raito quickly took a deep breath and posed the shard over his wrist. It seemed that Ryuzaki had finally figured out at least what he was about to do.

"No! Raito-kun stop right now-"

Raito dodged Ryuzaki's lunged by springing out of his own chair, not wasting anymore time Raito stabbed his wrist harshly with the sharp utensil. Ignoring the teams cries of surprise and dismay Raito quickly put the crimson drenched utensil to the white paper and quickly wrote Watari's real name down, he also wrote a number down as well.

_Quillsh Wammy- 10 years-peaceful_

Coming down from his panic induced attack Raito finally was able to comprehend the chaos that was going on around him. Without him realizing it he had been dodging and evading Ryuzaki's advances. His father and the others had also been trying to catch him but they hadn't been able to succeed. Raito it seemed had unconsciously applied some of his shinigami reflexes while he had been busy saving Watari.

Finally Raito stopped dodging the team's frantic hands and stood still. His father was holding onto his wrist and trying to apply pressure to it, he was screaming something but Raito couldn't comprehend what was being said. He was staring at the numbers above Watari's head. What he saw was something he couldn't grasp, couldn't comprehend at all.

_**Watari's life numbers where still falling.**_

Abide slower then they had before. It was like the numbers where unsure of themselves. Like they didn't know if they should have Watari die or not.

'Why? I wrote his name down…why would he still die?!'

Then Raito understood.

Raito ripped out of his father's and L's grasp, he had only just realize that he had been wrapped in L's embrace. L had had his arms wrapped tightly to Raito, and what startled and yet thrilled Raito was that he had been trembling. With what Raito recognized was fear and distress.

Raito again ignored his father's and L's yells and ran towards Watari and Matsuda both who were still on the other side of the room, Matsuda who was still holding onto L's gun and was unknowingly pointing it loosely towards Watari's chest. Raito understood now. Even if he had extended Watari's life, the gun was still destined to go off, and Watari was still in its path. It may not kill him right now, but it will injury him majorly and kill him in the future.

Raito took one last looked at Watari's numbers; he then narrowed his eyes determinedly and quickly got into between Watari and the loose gun. Matsuda had unknowingly put his finger on the trigger while all the commotion had been happening. Both Watari and Matsuda where startled when Raito ran towards them and stood in front of Watari facing Matsuda with a look of grim determination on his face.

Not a second latter Matsuda felt his finger spasm and incidentally pull on the trigger of the 9mm gun that L had entrusted to him.

A lone, loud gunshot sounded out. Ripping through the air and impacting straight into Raito's chest.

Hitting him straight through the heart.

----

Ok…do you all hate me now? X.x Heh I have to say that is one freaking mother of a cliffhanger. I'm so going to get reviews that either tell me to update immediately or tell me to roll over and die XP. Please don't stop reading or anything stupid like that. I warned you all that I would have major angst happening soon…well BAM AND WHAM BITCHES!!

"…"

I apologize if I offend any of you just now…I just had 2 AMP energy drinks one right after another and I just ate out with my bestest friends and had a really good day…I LUVS YOU ALL MY FLUFFY PLOT BUNNIES! (Sprinkles Tinker Bell fairy dust all over writers self) wwwwwwwhhhhhhhheeeeeeeeeeeeee!!! I CAN FLY!!

"…"

…cough…ahem…

…anyway back to my story.

I have rewritten this motherfucker of a chapter at least 3 fucking times!! Argh!!! First it was almost all comedy and fluff, but then I realized that it was just a crappy crack chapter and it didn't advance the plot at all! It was just pure funny and while that's all good and dandy…I want this story to stay in a goddamn plot-line!

In the second version Raito's father had did indeed brought his shotgun and tried to shoot L…and succeeded X3 but then I realized that it wasn't really fair for L to get shot like that…so I once again erased every fucking word I had spent hours working on and restarted…again!

This is the final version of this chapter, and it is a lot more serious then its previous two brothers, who where stupid and funny but not good at all! I killed them with pleasure…Muhahahahaha! XvX (don't even think about trying to find me to either kick my ass or shoot my own ass full of buckshot.) I have Writer Witness Protection…wow that's actually a good idea…:p

It was only as I was writing this chapter for the third and FINAL time that I realized that I didn't want Yagami to be a mean old man who hates his son's choice of lovers…I mean that is so overdone isn't it? Also in my one-shot fic I made Raito's parents really bitches so I decided I wanted to try something different…and I think I did! I have never read a fanfic which has protective BUT understanding Yagami-san…what do you think? Is it good? Did you like Yagami's reaction? Please tell me what you think!!!

Anyway…ummm, don't worry I'll try to have the next chapter up sometime soon…hopefully, and then we will get to the pissed and freaked out L…heh be prepared for scary L again…sadly for Raito that black wrath of L's will be directed at him this time.

And L should be learning some of the TRUTH about Raito's secret. YEA!!!

Sooo…if any of you obsessive readers want the next chapter out as soon as possible, you better motivate me with a bunch of reviews! NICE, LOVING REVIEWS DAMNIT!

That means…**REVIEW PEOPLE! REVIEW LIKE RAITO'S SEX LIFE WITH L DEPENDS ON IT!!! **


	15. Chapter 15

Warnings: Angst, Humor, Hurt and Comfort, Language, Furious-L, Fluffiness, ZAKI'S BACK! PLOT-TWISTS! Basically a lot of warnings.

I have a new poll up on my profile page…it is a poll on weather L and Raito should have **SEX**…SO VOTE PEOPLE! VOTE FOR L AND RAITO TO GET DOWN AND DIRTY! I WILL NOT PUT ANY SMUT (I mean really heavy make-out scenes...kissing is still aloud) IN THIS STORY ANYMORE UNTIL I GET EVERYONE'S VOTE ON THE IDEA!! So…please go to my profile page right away (after your done reading this chapter of course) and vote!

You could not even guess how much I feel loved right now…OMG…I LOVE ALL YOU PEOPLE! OVER 38 REVIEWS! OMG! OwO…heh so because of that many reviews I decided to update right away! This is what happens people; you review like that and I make sure to update like crazy! Heh I'll keep my responses brief because there are so many:

Pouf, - yep hehe you were right! XD laugh all you want, you'll just be laughing like I do, because I also find this story funny (mostly when it's least appropriate to laugh to, i.e. when Raito's crying XD) hmmm your plans for collage sound solid enough, heh I'm also dependent on my mom so I only go to a collage less then an hour away. ;) Good luck in McGill! XD enjoy the early chapter!

ILoveGaara, - thanks! XD hope you enjoy this chapter as well as you did the last!

Vanity, - hehe I won't tell! XD you'll just have to read this chapter to see what happens! Thank you for the review, enjoy!

Ducky, - yes a very nasty cliffhanger indeed, thanks for the review!

Hazard23, - you'll need to vote on my poll if you want Raito and L to have sex! XD I'm pretty sure what your vote is though, I'll try not to exaggerate, and if I do I apologize in advance. Thanks for the review, enjoy!

UneasyReign, - I do it because I can! XD I love being evil…and look at it this way, I got more reviews in the last chapter then any other, I KNOW it because of the cliffhanger…so why wouldn't I be evil? XD

Kyorose, - you might want to get use to either L or Raito getting hurt…it's just way too much fun! XD hmmm I didn't think of the possibility of it being Ryuk, possibilities XD hehe no though it wasn't Ryuk…_this time_…XD well…I will say this…no, no one can own the LifeNote without Raito's permission…but they can read it and touch it if they see it, they can not write in it either…remember they would need Raito's blood, willing given blood. The conversation with Watari will happen in the future, not sure when, but it will happen.

Meva, - Thanks! Enjoy the extra early chapter! XD

BishounenYaoiLover, - heh don't die! I updated extra early so readers like you wouldn't have to suffer! XD

Hinatakyuubi, - yep it seems everyone hated that cliffhanger CX thank you for the review

SeethingKitsune, - no reason to be angsty…I updated! XD

Dark Oracle, - Please vote on my new poll for Raito to have sex with L! heh thank you, I like my little (huge) one-shot…which will have a sequel! Smut with some plot! Not as much plot as this story though XD

Melodic Masterpiece, - I'm happy you love my story XD so it's your first time reviewing? (Scrolls all old reviews) yep it is, thank you for reviewing now! XD

May or Yesterday, - heh, then enjoy this chapter! CX

Baow, - Nope, an angst-ridden Raito is just too much fun! Thanks for the review! XD

AikiaJuniper, - heh be careful not to choke to much…I don't want you to die ;.; hehe Raito's love for L can be a great and truly funny thing…as exampled in the last chapter! XD

Sayoko's-fire, - hahahahah…sorry can't do anything about the twitching but here's the next chapter for you…XD

G-Wing Gurl, - heh of course Raito's ok XD and yes Raito's daddy was trying to embarrass him on purpose! That's what parents do to their children when they talk to their children's significant other. XD

Kyrre25, - Yes an embarrassed Raito makes the world go round and makes chocolate taste good! XD heh

Black-Dranzer-1119, - the explaining will happen more in the next chapter, glad you enjoyed the last chapter a lot! XD thank you so much for the review!

Skyoticstalker27, - Yes, yes I know pure evil is what I am…XD

NeoDarkcloud, - I'm happy you like this story! XD enjoy

Zaidee, - Don't worry Raito will not die in this story…neither will L…maybe….XD (evil grin) yes Matsuda is an idiot, and he gets what's coming to him in this chapter!

Toraus, - Yea he did save Watari! XD Watari is the most awesome butler/sniper ever! Hehe don't worry, I don't go skydiving…I fly a lot though…hmmm no parachute…sounds interesting XD hee I tried to answer your question earlier but if you have any additional questions feel free to PM at anytime XD

Isamu-michi, - Thanks! I thought my last version of chapter 14 was the best! Besides…I like understanding Yagami-san, it's so different then his usual freaked out hate L self XD Yes Plot-Twists are yummy! CX I give up on making Raito seem more canon like…he's a freaking school girl in love! YES! XD

Paper Kettle, - DON'T DIE! XD heh I'm thrilled that your in love with my story, don't get mad…Raito doesn't die…

Lady Vampyre Nefertiri, - I decided to respond to both your second and first review XD the final version was the best out of all my ch 14 tries. I'm sorry if Raito is acting really OOC…but I can't change it this far into the story, it would be to weird. Not to mention I wouldn't know how to anyway. 0x0 I quite the energy drinks, I got bad headaches and they were killing me…possibly literally…X.x I drink Water now! CX

Blood-fire-dragon, - hehe I luvs you to. XD hope you enjoy this chapter! ………_husky puppy underbelly......to the extreme!_ XDDDDDD

C Elise, - thank you, enjoy!

Viskii, - thank you! XD yes everyone is mostly OOC but…I think it gives me more flexibility to mess around with everyone then if I was trying to keep them in character. Glad you're liking it so far, enjoy!

Ecanis, - eep!! It's been 3 days… (Cries) don't hurt me! If you voodoo me I won't be able to finish this story! ;.; have mercy…CX enjoy

Kamerreon, - thank you for such a wonderful compliment XD yes I also hate having to wait for updates…and also, why is it the only truly good and interesting fics never update? Or if they do it takes months and months at a time? Why is that?! Don't worry though I try to update pretty regularly, so you don't usually have to wait to long for updates! CX ummm…I try to beta myself, you know as practice? Well see how well I do for now.

Yoshiluvr, - Why does everyone seem bent on threatening me? Oh…is it because I'm a very evil person who leaves bad evilish cliffhangers? Yep I think it is! XD enjoy the update!

Szandy Ballack, - First and foremost…RAITO AND L WILL NOT DIE NOR WILL THEY BREAK UP! I said in the last chapter before I began that I love happy endings so if I want it to be a happy ending they will of course not die nor will they break up, they will fight and argue and beat each other up a lot and yell and accuse each other…but they will ALWAYS make up and most likely kiss up as well! Also I love changing the emotions and atmosphere at least a few times in a chapter, you know make it fluff, then funny then depressed, then angry, then fluff again. Its just soooo much fun to do that! XD In the next chapter they will have **the talk** and it will be serious and there might be some crying involved…but it will all end ok! XD

Setsuko teshiba, - Ok! XD

Alabirdie, - heh, here you go one extra early update! XD enjoy!

Part 3 of 3 of the Plot-twists that were suppose to happen in one chapter!

Takes place right after the last chapter!

---

It was getting so cold…that was the one thought that kept running through Raito's mind after he felt the bullet impacted into his chest.

As his vision started to blackout Raito was able to make out Matsuda's horror filled face staring unblinking at him, he could hear the cries and yells of the team and his father sound around him. But the thing that most caught his attention before he passed out was…a single anguished scream…L's scream…

…and then Raito knew no more…

---

Raito felt himself drifting in a hazy of darkness…it was peaceful and as long as he was here he didn't have to worry…no redemption…no Kira…no pain…no trouble…but…something was nagging him…

'_Raito…Raito wake up…come on Raito wake up…Raito…Yagami Raito you get your ass up right now or I'll stick you in a Hello Kitty suit and show Lawliet!'_

"What!"

Raito opened his eyes, which he only just realized were closed. He looked wildly around; he was…in his old room?

'_Well it's about time you got up; I was really starting to think that you already kicked the bucket, which would suck for both of us you know.'_

Raito started to look frantically around. Who the hell?

Raito decided to voice his question out loud, because as far as he could see he was all alone in his room.

"Who's there? And can you tell me why the hell I'm home?"

'_Awww…you mean you've already forgotten about me? How cruel, woe is me.'_

"Ummm…"

'_Oh come and think! You're the genius between us, though personally I think I got the better looks between us. Heh anyway, try to think…what's the last thing you remember?'_

"Well…"

Raito sat up from where he had been laying prone on his bed; he looked around as he thought. His room was just like he remembered, clean, impersonal…boring as all hell.

'Let's see the last thing I remember…well I think I was working…yes, I was working on a case…Ryuzaki was next to me, well chained to me more like it. Hmmm I remember crying for some reason but I can't…Watari…why?'

And then it all suddenly came back to him.

"Oh fucking hell!"

'_My sediments exactly Raito, that was pure stupidity, what you did. You remember what the little mother said? You-will-die-if-you-get-stabbed-in-the-heart…and where do you think the bullet went numbnuts? Hmm? Take a wild guess, come on I dare you!'_

"Zaki?"

'_Oh give the kid a candy! He finally figured it out; geez getting shot really short-circuits your brain doesn't it? You'd never had taken that long to figure it out normally.' _

"Am I...am I dead?"

Raito felt mostly still numb to everything around him, the question was asked in an almost uncaring manner.

'_Oh stop being such a drama queen Raito, no you're not dead. Though it was quite the close call…you got shot in the heart, not stabbed. At least the gods are specific to a fault in that regarded. Remember how I said that we wouldn't be able to talk unless it was a life or death situation? Well…here I am…talking to you…you're a very boring conversationist after your been shot, you know this?'_

Raito was now starting to feel something through the numbing feeling…annoyance.

'_Yea, that __**would**__ be your first emotion wouldn't it? You're such a stick in the mud Raito.'_

Raito felt his eye start to twitch a bit.

"You're…in an interesting mood aren't you? By the way where are we? And why can't I see you?"

'_Well yes I'm in an interesting mood as you so nicely put it! I was rudely woken up from a nice dream of yummy ice-cream mountains and hot Baywatch chicks to see that you almost got us KILLED! Of course I would be acting a little off! You almost gave ME a heart attack! And I don't even have a real body to have one in! You…you jerk!'_

Raito was alarmed now, Zaki seemed fine before but Raito realized that him being weirdly humorous was a defense mechanism. Zaki had been really scared.

"Zaki…I'm sorry. I didn't mean to frighten you. It's just that…Watari would have died, and I knew or at least I thought, that I would be able to survive a gunshot wound, you know, because I have super powers of the healing sort."

Raito tried to keep his apology somewhat humorous, to diminish the serious of the situation, in the hopes that Zaki would calm down.

'…_you know you suck at trying to be funny…thanks anyway though. I guess it's the thought that counts or something like that. Anyway to answer your questions, we're not really in your room, you passed out when after you got shot. Which reminds me…why the hell does Matsuda keep on shooting you? This is what? Technically the 5__th__ time he's shot you? From what I can gather from your memories he shot you 4 times when you were found out as Kira in your last life…and now once here, and this time it was a fatal hit…or it would have been if you'd been a normal human, heh, guess your lucky your not.'_

Raito murmured at that. "Yea, lucky me…"

'_Oh buckle up party pooper, your no fun when you're all depressed like. Anyway to answer your second question well…I'm mad at you so I don't feel like gracing you with my divine beautiful presence right now.'_

Raito smirked at that.

"You mean that you can't right? You can't become corporal right now, your still not rested enough."

'_Oh gosh darn it; he's got all smart again. Man, it was nice almost being the smart one for a second. Yes genius I can't be anything but a mysterious voice right now. I may not be strong enough for you to see me right now…but I am strong enough to nag you to the brink of total meltdown. So you better be nice to me!'_

Raito didn't know it until he felt his face hurt, but he was smiling broadly. He didn't stop when he realized it either, he did tone it a bit down though, otherwise his face would be hurting a lot later.

"So Zaki, can you tell me what's been happening? You can tell what's happening outside my mind when I'm passed out right? How long have I been out of it? Is my wound already healed? How about the others? How bad are they freaking out?"

'_Whoa, hold up! I can only answer one question at a time. To answer your first question you've haven't been out that long…maybe an hour or so. And yes your wound is healed; I'm not even going to tell you how hard it was to heal that wound. Let's see…you want to know how bad everyone on the outside is freaking as you so nicely put it? BAD. L already has your unconscious body back in an integration cell and strapped in a chair.'_

Raito felt disbelief at this revelation; he didn't get it…why would L do that after he saved Watari?

"Why…why would L do that? I just got shot! And he knew that I had unnatural healing abilities, he saw that earlier so it can't be that…"

'_Your right it wasn't that you miraculous survived a gunshot to the heart, though everyone was freaking out at that. No it wasn't that…remember how you wished for the LifeNote to mesmerize into the real world? Well…when you passed out you forgot to wish it back to your shinigami form, so…oh and also added to that, you forgot that you had the Eyes for a time in your human form, and like the idiot you are you looked straight at Lawliet. What do you think he thought when he saw red demonic eyes staring back at him from you?'_

Raito froze as the reality of what happened bombed him all at once.

"SHIT!"

'_I couldn't have said it better myself.'_

---

"What the hell am I going to do now?!"

Raito was not freaking out, at least that's what he kept telling himself, but Zaki's snickering wasn't helping though.

"Would you cut that out and help me think?! Ryuzaki, L! Has my LifeNote, _our_ Lifenote, and to top that off he's more then likely looked inside of it because he's already got me strapped down. What if he thinks I was trying to kill Watari? Or worse what if he thinks I wanted to kill him? Argh…I think I'm going to be sick…he must think that I'm 100 percent Kira now and that I was trying to kill all of them suddenly…I hate my life."

'_Now, now calm down, its really not that bad…well ok it's bad, but it could be worse. Also there's another factor you didn't think of that he would think.'_

"Oh and what's that?"

You could practically taste the sarcasm that dripped from Raito.

'_God your such a negative person…the other factor your anguished emo mind couldn't think of is…well your remember that you cut open your wrist? You know, so that you could write Watari's name in the lifenote with your blood? Remember you did that in front of __**everyone**__, what would you think if someone you knew suddenly started to act strange and then tried to kill themselves? Or at least look like they tried to kill themselves. Lawliet is most likely thinking that you were controlled by Kira…so guess what that means?'_

Raito was listening with rapid attention, he came to the same conclusion as Zaki did the moment he was done talking.

"He…he would think that I was 100 percent _not_ Kira…that I couldn't be Kira if I was being controlled by him."

Raito felt like he was in a dream…and technically he was but he ignored that part of his logical mind. This was _way_ too good to be a dream.

'_Jackpot! Yes, or at least that is the most logical and not to mention positive conclusion.'_

Raito felt his face spilt in an almost crazy smile and he didn't try to stop it. This had to be one of the most best things to happen to him since he had come back…well this and the hot make-out session he had with L.

Raito felt his face start to burn slightly when he remembered that. The increased snickering of Zaki just added fuel to the fire.

"Will you stop reading my mind!"

'_Nope, no can do, you forget, we are one and the same, your mind, my mind, mono-o-mono, all that karma jazz. We share this mind Raito so I guess I have to get use to those dirty thought of yours…not to mention highly arousing, wow…do you really think L can twist that way? It seems humanly impossible.'_

"Oh my god…"

Raito flopped back down and tried to suffocate himself in his pillow.

'_Now now it's not that bad…besides look at it this way, you now have someone who could give you pointers on the best sexual positions that that dirty mind of yours comes up with…geez are you sure you're a virgin? Wow…oh I get it; you looked up some Karma Sutra stuff didn't you?'_

"Would you please stop!!"

'_Ok, ok anyway I wanted to tell you something-'_

Suddenly Zaki became quite, Raito who despite being horrendous embarrassed had been listening to him talk, so when Zaki went suddenly quite silent mid-sentence Raito became concern.

"Zaki? Are you ok? Why'd you go quite-"

'_Fuck!'_

Raito was so startled by Zaki's sudden shout that he fell off the bed.

"What the hell was that for?!"

'_God I didn't think he had it in him…oh owie…geez if you ever had any doubt that Lawliet loved you it would be gone if you could see this…shit that's got to hurt…'_

"What!? What's happening? You're seeing what's happening outside aren't you?! Tell me!"

'_Well…it seems that L only just realized that Matsuda shot you…he was to freaked out and upset before to really think about it…and well…he's basically kicking the shit out of Matsuda right now…oh my god I didn't think a arm is suppose to bend that way…heh and the funny thing is your father and Watari and the others aren't stopping him. They all seem to be upset as well…you are so fucking loved right now…hmm…I think you should be waking up soon. When you do be prepared for a seriously pissed off Lawliet, you basically scared the shit out of him and in addition to that he has read some of the rules in the LifeNote as well. The same one's you, yourself have read, it seems that only the ones you've read yourself is converted to English, anything else in the Lifenote is in Shinigami script. Just try to be calm and don't panic, let him burn out his anger at you…then you can kiss and make-up!'_

Raito could practically hear the smirk that occupied that last sentence.

"Whatever…so Zaki, are you going to go back to sleep the moment I wake up? Or are you going to be talking to me from now on."

'_Hmm, I don't know yet, I won't know if I'm rested enough to speak to you full time yet until you wake up. So if you don't hear from me in a while don't think it's because I can't or won't talk to you. It might just be I'm thinking or…well ok it might mean I'm mad at you. Either that or I really am taking a nap again. But if you ever really need me, either for advice or just to talk to, just call out my name. I promise you I will respond.'_

Raito was speechless, Zaki was…well he was just being very nice at the moment and while Raito appreciated it he couldn't help but feel that it was a ploy to keep him composed enough to deal with what was happening in the outside world.

"Thank you Zaki, I appreciate that. So, when do I leave?"

It was silent again and just as Raito was going to repeat him question Zaki answered.

'_Right now.'_

Raito blacked out before he could even say good-bye.

---

"…urg…"

Raito felt like crap, he had woken up gradually, feeling as though he had a hangover, his head was pounding furiously and his stomach was nauseated.

He had first noticed that he was sitting in a hard metal chair, it took his a few seconds to realize that his arms where handcuffed behind his back as well. His head was hanging low and he could clearly see the bloody and ripped shirt that he was still wearing, he didn't feel any real pain so that must mean that his wound had already healed over.

'That's right…I remember, the more serious the wound the faster it will heal…well that's all good I suppose. Still…having bloody cloth dry on bare skin is not pleasant one bit. Couldn't they have at least taken my shirt off? I can tell they already ripped it open a bit to see the wound…they should have just ripped it entirely off. It would have saved me the aggravation of dried blood.'

Raito was still kind of out of it, so it took him a while to notice that he wasn't alone in the room. The sounds of fighting and yelling were only just now starting to penetrate his murky mind.

Raito lifted his head just a bit so that he could see what was happening around him without notifying those around him that he was awake.

What he saw shocked him to the core.

L was…well he _really_ was kicking the shit out of Matsuda.

The room that Raito was in was pretty big for an interrogation room, Raito was more towards the back of the room, and he noticed that even if he was in a uncomfortable chair and was handcuffed, the handcuffs were really loose, so much so that he could even slip them off of himself if he so desired, also his head was slightly pillowed with his father's jacket. Raito was shocked by this. Why?

Raito looked around the room, trying to ignore what was happening in the middle of the room, his father and the others were lined up by the wall, watching solemnly as L dealt out his own version of punishment to Matsuda, none of them looked like they were going to help Matsuda out anytime soon. His father and Watari looked especially enraged and insensitive to Matsuda's predicament. They looked like they were silently cheering L on.

Raito dragged his eyes back at the devastating scene in front of him. Even though he himself was pissed at Matsuda for being so careless and _yet again_ _shooting him_, he couldn't help but feel sorry for the guy, L was not going easy on him one bit.

In fact, he seemed to be fighting even more viciousness then when he and Raito fought. It slightly resembled the beating that Raito had gotten when he had called L a junkie in that room…but 100 times worse.

'I don't know if Matsuda is going to survive the beating L is giving him if no one stops him…but it doesn't look like anyone's going to stop L anytime soon…god damnit I hate being the good guy! It was easier to be the bad guy…oh well, might as well direct L's anger to someone who can take it…which is me I guess…'

Raito took a deep breath and closed his eyes, he tried to compose himself, because the moment he made it clear that he was awake…and even worse, that he was sane and not under Kira's control…all hell was going to break loose.

Raito steeled his resolve and opened his eyes, might as well get this over with as soon as possible, before they had a corpse to hide.

"Hey, L? I think you're overdoing it a bit, why don't you let him go? It wouldn't do for the world's greatest detective to be charged with murder. "

All movement in the room stopped at once.

Raito looked straight at L, ignoring everyone else. L had Matsuda's shirt in one grasp and had been in the middle of rearranging Matsuda's face, but the moment he heard Raito he had frozen, all that penetrated the sudden stillness was Matsuda's whimpers of pain and fear.

L had his back turned slightly away from Raito, but he quickly dropped Matsuda to the ground and spun around. Raito flinched away when he got a good look at L.

L was a mess, his eye's where red and puffy looking, making the black shadows around his eyes stand out more and look more darker then usual, his eye's were also blood shot and gazed over with tears. Tear tracks flowed down his cheeks, falling down his chin in small clear rivers. His hair seemed more chaotic and feral then ever, but what really got Raito flinching was the look on his face.

Total and utter devastation, it was like his whole world had ended and he didn't know what to do except blame himself.

Raito tried to keep a passive expressionless mask on but it was just too much, he felt his own eyes sting and tears started to slowly fill his own eyes. He couldn't bear to see L like this…he would rather L be mad then to see his in such a state of sorrow and misery.

Raito watched as L's face closed up; slowly the tears started to dry up and a hard expression over took his face. Raito felt his breath hitch; it seemed that L was now starting to think logically with his mind instead of with his emotions.

"Raito…you weren't controlled by Kira…were you."

It was more a statement then a question, still Raito felt that L deserved a real answer. Raito tired to ignore his pounding heart, which had speed up when he heard L say his name without its normal 'kun'.

"No L…I wasn't being controlled at all."

L nodded his head coolly, and without moving his head or taking his eyes off Raito he talked to the rest of the team.

"Everyone…I would like it if you all left the room right now, take Matsuda and get him some medical attention, then I want you to take his badge and security card, he will not be coming back to join us, nor will he be returning to the police. He is too much of a liability. Please feel free to once again to take the day off; we will resume investigating the Kira case when you come back in to work tomorrow morning. Please Yagami-san; don't argue with me on this."

Raito watched as L cut off his father before he could even object. His father really had no choice but to agree to L's terms at the moment. Without even looking once in Raito's direction everyone left the room, Mogi and Aizawa quickly went forward and dragged Matsuda's now unconscious body out of the room as well. His father looked like he wanted to say something to Raito but he quickly shook his head and walked out as well. Watari was the last to leave, but before he also turned away he walked to L and put his hand on his shoulder, giving it a light squeeze, he nodded his head once at Raito before also departing.

Soon enough the only one's left where the unmoving L and Raito who was still stuck in the chair.

A dead silence seemed to still the air around them. Raito kept his gaze on L, even though he really wanted to turn his head away, L's face was nothing short of enraged. But what made it so much worse was how it was an almost eerie tranquil wrath.

Finally after a few minutes of staring at each other L made his move.

Raito was startled out of his stare down by the speed that L moved with; before he knew it L was standing only a few inches away from him. Raito was unprepared for what happened next.

SLAP!

L didn't punch him, nor yell at him or accuse him. No instead he slapped Raito across the face, he did so, so hard that Raito knew that he would have a scarlet bruise hand print on his face for a while, healing powers or no healing powers.

Raito's head had turned with the force of the strike; he slowly turned back around to see a panting L still with his hand posed in the air.

Raito knew he shouldn't but he couldn't help himself.

"Do you feel better now?"

It was apparently the wrong thing to say, because L exploded.

"Fuck you! Do you know what you did to me?! You fucking idiot! How the fuck was I suppose to react to you acting weird and suddenly jumping up and trying to stab yourself?! I thought…I thought it was my fault! That I caused to you react that way because…because of what's been happening between us, and then you…and then you fucking let yourself get shot! What-the-fuck-Yagami?!? Or should I call you Kira now?"

Raito was kind of afraid right now, he had never seen L swear so much at one time. Hell he had never seen L swear period. Except when they got caught by his father, but other then that he had never seen L loose it as he did right now…it scared Raito.

Raito didn't know what to say, on one hand he was ecstatic that L seemed to care for him enough to be really pissed off that Raito got hurt, on the other hand…he didn't like that L accused him of being Kira once again.

Because Raito didn't know what to say to L's rather passionate speech he just went with his usual reply when L accused him of being Kira.

"L…I'm not Kira."

That just seemed to piss off L even more.

"Then how do you explain what the fuck happened Yagami?! If you weren't controlled by Kira…then that must mean that you are KIRA!"

Now Raito was getting pissed off himself; the calm, cool impassive mask that he had been trying to maintain cracked and dissolved like L's sugar cubes that he liked to eat.

"What the hell would you know L?! You don't know anything! Nothing!! You sit behind a fucking computer and analyze fucking data and come to conclusions based off goddamn evidence that you find convent! Never thinking outside the box! Never wondering if maybe there's something more! You're a fucking bloodhound and once you have a fucking theory on something you will never let it go! Never! You never think about if maybe there was something more going on…something that you'd never figure out if you don't learn to trust people…trust me…things aren't always as it seems L…please just…just listen to me…"

Raito started to wined down as his voice started to go out…he didn't know he had that much anger hidden in him. It seemed that L's continued condemning declarations of him being Kira had worn on him more then he realized. He hadn't meant to loose his cool but…it seemed that L's accusing him of being Kira only because he hadn't been controlled…even after all that they had been through…it just seemed that L was trigger happy on pointing out that he was a mass murderer.

And that just pissed Raito off like nothing else.

"L listen…I'm not Kira, in fact I can guarantee 100 percent that the Kira that you've been hunting for…the very first Kira…is dead. He is never coming back and whoever the Kira that is out there now, which we both know is not the first Kira, he is nothing like the first Kira, that Kira is dead. I should know…"

L had backed up a bit when Raito had exploded in his own anger rant, now he just hunched there, a lost sad expression on his face. When Raito said that 'I should know' L's eyes got a strange glint to them, curiosity also filled his face.

"Why Raito-kun? Why should you know?"

Raito took a deep breath and looked up into L's unfathomable luminous dark eyes. He knew that what he was about to do was most likely suicidal but…he was so fucking tried of lying that he didn't really care. It wasn't like L knew how to kill him anyway, but Raito was pretty sure he wouldn't want to after this. Kick his ass maybe or even ground him to their room for a month, but kill…no, they could no longer kill each other. They felt too much…or at least Raito did.

"The reason I know Kira is dead and never coming back L is because…I killed him. I killed with my bare hands, chocking the life out of him."

Raito heard a sharp breath sound out. It seemed that whatever L had expected him to say, it hadn't been that. But Raito wasn't finished, he knew if he left it at that, sometime in the future the questions would rise about the truth, and also, he knew that if he wanted L to be beside him for all eternity he would need to tell L the truth about him. He didn't plan on telling L everything right now but…

"That's not all L…the only reason I was able to kill him was…because he…"

'Wow this is harder then I thought it would be, I don't…I don't want him to hate me, I don't want to lose him.'

Raito took one last deep breath and closed his eyes, bracing himself for the assault that he was more then halfway expecting.

"…because he was me…because I use to be Kira L."

Silence.

"I know Raito-kun…I know."

---

Raito looked up in shock, his eyes widen as he saw L standing there a few inches away with a small sad smile on his face.

"Wha-what did you say?"

L just shook his head in weary amusement; he then reached into his pocket and pulled out a small key and walked around out of Raito's eye sight. Raito felt his hands pulling a bit as L unlocked the handcuffs from his wrists. As Raito felt the cold metal fall from his slightly sore wrists he moved them to examine them. Slight bruising was shown on his pale skin. It seemed that someone had tightened them before they had realized what they were doing and loosened them.

Raito saw a shadow and looked up, he was shocked to see L on his knees in front of him, he seemed to be also examining Raito's hands. A slight frown was on his face as he caught sight of the bruising.

"L…what did you mean you know? What do you know? How…how can you act so calm? I…I confessed."

Raito looked at L intently but it seemed that L was determined to ignore him right then. L reached out and gently took Raito's hands into his own, gently holding them and stroking them with his long fingers. Raito tried to contain the shiver he felt but he was sure that L felt it anyway.

Raito waited for L to answer his question, but as the seconds pasted by it became apparent that L had no intention of answering him.

"L...Lawliet? Please…"

The fingers stopped caressing his hands; Raito felt them start to tremble ever so slightly.

Finally L looked up and stared at Raito with such intensity that Raito felt like he would burn alive.

"Before I tell Raito-kun what I know…I have something I'd like to say first to him."

Raito just sat there confused, but it seemed that L wasn't mad at him anymore, also he seemed to take Raito's confession better then Raito could have ever hoped for, Raito decided to just go with whatever L said at this point, maybe if he did that L would tell him what the hell was going on. One moment he's being accused of Kira 100 percent and the next he's confessing that it was true and L's acting like it doesn't matter.

He was fucking beyond confused at this point.

"Ok L…what is it you want to tell me?"

Raito sat there waiting. He was looking at L, who had ducked his head again as soon as Raito spoke.

But not quick enough…Raito could see that L was blushing.

'What? Why would he be blushing?'

L finally seemed to realize that he wouldn't be able to control his red face and stood up, Raito who's hands which were still locked with L, was also pulled to his feet. He wobbled a bit as he regained his footing. L stood there patiently in front of him, still holding Raito's hands in a gentle but very firm grip.

Raito after a minute or two finally got his balance under control; he looked at L's pinkish face. He couldn't help but think that it was utterly adorable the way he blushed a light cherry red.

They stood there, not three inches apart. So close that when they breathed their chest brushed each others ever so slightly.

Raito noticed that their faces seemed to be getting closer and closer but he didn't stop it.

Finally just as their lips where about to touch L whispered something.

"Raito…my beautiful Raito…_Je t'aime aussi"_

Then L leaned forward and kissed the stunned Raito.

---

_Je t'aime aussi – _I love you too

Awww…heh wow this was certainly an interesting chapter, the next chapter will have the **big important conversation, **it was going to be in this chapter…but since I updated almost a whole week early (I usually update once a week, but my last update was only 3 days ago) I decided to put it in the next chapter, it will give me more time to iron it out.

L is a very devious and sly person…he tricked Raito into confessing, if anyone was kind of confused by his 180 degree change of emotion, you know like how he was pissed off and mad and accusing Raito of being Kira again at one moment and then Raito confessed to being Kira and L seemed ok with it? Well he will explain why that is in the next chapter.

He was genuinely angry but…it was because he was scared that Raito had really died, and was mad at himself, Matsuda and Raito for making him experience and display that much emotion. I'll explain it more in the next chapter.

YEA! Zaki's back! Well kind of, he'll be popping in and out from now on, like whenever Raito does something stupid again or thinking dirty thoughts (smile) hehe

Oh, it seems we know have an answer as to weather L was awake or not when Raito had confessed his love earlier…XD hehe, he was apparently awake.

_**Happy All Hallows Eve! & Happy Birthday L Lawliet!**_

**_And remember go to my profile page and vote on my new poll if you want L and Raito to have sex or not!_**


	16. Chapter 16

I'M SO FREAKING SORRY!! I KNOW THIS IS REALLY, REALLY LATE!! IT'S BECAUSE…I HAVE A REALLY BAD CASE OF WRITER'S BLOCK!! OMFK! SORRY!

Updates will take much longer then before. Instead of the updates being once every week it will most likely be an update once a month. FORGIVE ME!!

Also…I've been watching Bleach lately, I've gotten through 195 episodes in only a week…and my eyes burn!! I'm also really into Detective Conan/Cased Closed! I'm watching the show on the internet and there are already over 500 episodes made right now!! Also am watching all of the 12 Detective Conan movies that are on the internet, you know because America is so slow. DX

I'm way to in watching anime right now, instead of writing fanfiction, I would like to apologize for that, it's all you readers who are the ones that suffer for that…sorry!

I'm thinking of writing some fanfiction for those two shows too…hmmm…

Remember people go to my profile page and vote on my poll! If you want to see L and Raito get down and dirty I need to know! Though the way it's going I think L and Raito might end up between the sheets soon! I guess I should practice writing smutty scenes eh? XD

Thank you all so much who have reviewed! I'm sorry I'm not going to reply to all of your reviews but I don't really have the time, not if I want to post this by tonight, I'm so sorry. Thank you all for reviewing, I love you all!!!!

**Pouf, ILoveGarra, Black-Dranzer-1119, Isamu-michi, ButterflyOnna77, Viskii, Seethingkitsune, Lady Vampyre Nefertiri, Kamerreon, AikiaJuniper, Vanity, Kyrre25, Ebil Dustbunny of Doooom, May or Yesterday, Zaidee, Szandy Ballack, Yoshiluvr, Paper Kettle, Toraus, Blood-fire-dragon, Dotti55, Alabirdie, Detective1412, Hinatakyuubi, Messy Cubical, Primaaryet, Mizu1411, G-Wing Gurl, Eiri and Kurama lover07, WildFoxFire, Eternal Requiem, Shinimoeru, Jessie,**

If anyone has any questions you are all free to PM me at anytime! Please do if you have any questions, I will be happy to answer them to the best of my ability, I don't like my readers to be confused and frustrated if they can't understand something.

Starts up right after the last chapter! There is Lime in the beginning of this chapter, you have been warned! Enjoy!

----

Raito never really got the chance to process what L had just confessed to him. He was to busy trying not to come in his pants instead from the sudden sensual attack.

Raito moaned as L's wet tongue started to caress his lips, asking to be let in, no more like demanding. Raito didn't even have to think about it, he just parted his lips ever so slightly, but that seemed to be enough for Ryuzaki.

L pressed his tongue into Raito's mouth, swiftly overpowering Raito and leaving him an aroused puddle of mush.

Raito's mind went blissfully blank; all he could feel was the pleasure that was thundering through his body. L began to suck and nip on Raito's tongue, twisting his own wet appendage with Raito's and guiding it back into L's own mouth.

Raito whose mind was still a puddle of mush was vaguely aware of L's arms wrapping around him and pulling him deeper into L's embrace. Raito didn't mind though, in fact he noticed that his own hands had clenched tightly in L's shirt some time ago, as if he was afraid that L would vanish if he didn't hold onto him.

Soon L got Raito's tongue inside his own mouth and started to show Raito what he liked. Raito shyly started his own exploration of L's mouth. Raito let his own tongue sweep L's mouth, mapping out the moist cavern. Raito could feel both his and L's saliva mix and dribble out the side of his mouth, causing it to stream down his chin.

For some reason his usual OCD didn't find this disgusting at all, in fact it aroused him even more to feel their mixed saliva dripping down his face and wetting the collar of his shirt.

The need for air won out though a few minutes later, Raito tore his lips from L's regretfully and gulped for air. L quickly leaned forward and licked up the trail of saliva that had dripped down Raito's chin and neck, after he had licked it all up causing Raito to shiver in arousal, he then started to nibble down Raito's neck, pressing kisses and licks to some of Raito's more sensitive spots on his neck that Raito hadn't even know existed until now, whenever he pressed down on one of these spots with his lips and tongue it caused Raito to lightly whimper at the spikes of pleasure that coursed through him.

'Where-? Where did he learn to do all this?'

But just as that thought wandered into his blissfully hazed mind L decided he was done being gentle and started to suck hard on Raito's neck. In the exact spot as he had already marked the night before, the hicky had faded some in the few hours but it was still faintly red and bruised from its treatment before, so it was still hypersensitive to any type of touch.

Raito yelped in surprise and then moaned in pleasurable pain.

"Ahhh! L please!"

Raito didn't know what he was asking for but all he knew was that he wanted more.

L hummed a bit in respond to Raito's pled; his mouth was to busy sucking and biting Raito's neck to say anything.

Raito started to pant for air as his body temperature started to go up, he knew he was forgetting something important but he didn't care. This was far too pleasurable.

Raito hazily decided that he also need to participant, after all he's couldn't let L do all the work now could he?

He dipped his head and ran his tongue along the shell of L's ear, causing L to let out a low moan in respond.

Raito let out his own muffled chuckle and started to let his hands wander and stroke L's clothed form as his mouth was currently occupied molesting L's ear.

Raito could dimly feel L's arms remove themselves from where they had been holding him around his neck, but before he could even think about protesting he felt L's cold hands suddenly slide underneath his shirt, sliding and fondling along his skin causing Raito's skin to break out in goose-bumps.

Raito murmured in L's ear. "Cold L, your hands are like ice."

"Sorry Raito-kun, you'll just have to help me warm them up."

Raito felt a shiver run up and down his back and it had nothing to do with being cold. Sadly though with the sudden shock of L's cold hands Raito's mind was starting to clear up some. He knew that they need to stop, that this was neither the time nor the place for such a thing.

"L…as much as I would love to continue, we need to talk…"

Raito felt L sigh into his neck, causing Raito to bit back a smile at the sexual frustration he could feel L radiating.

"Do we really have to Raito-kun? Can't we…"

Raito could hear the pout in L's voice, this time Raito couldn't stop the silly smile from overtaking his face.

As much as Raito really did want to continue what they were doing he knew that they must stop. They need to talk first, truths needed to be spoken before anything could happen between them and also…

'L's just way to cute sometimes…but as much as I want to continue…I need…'

"I need to know L, I need to know if you…if you can accept me first…I can't-Ryuzaki…Lawliet…I need to know if you could truly love me…_for me_…all of me."

Raito heard L sigh against his neck once more then he felt him pull away slightly. Raito felt the loss and shivered a bit in respond of the sudden chill as L walked a few feet away from him. But Raito understood, if L and he were even vaguely close to each other they would have been tearing each others cloths off right now. The heat of the moment may have been broken but it was still too soon for them to be comfortable being close to each other if they didn't want to get all hot and bothered again.

"Ok Raito-kun, I understand…but maybe later we could finish this?"

Raito chuckled as L tried to give him puppy dog eyes. Cute but…Raito knew L too much.

"L stop the fake chibi look, and about finishing…we'll see now won't we? Also…you were awake weren't you? The night before when I…"

Raito was to embarrassed to continue, he had confessed to L _because_ he had thought he wouldn't have been able to hear him in the first place, to find out that he had been awake…well let's just say that the blush that Raito now sported on his face couldn't get a deeper shade of red then it already was. Raito couldn't really process it in his head that _L Lawliet _had confessed his love _back. _It felt too much like a dream and Raito could only believe it when L heard the whole story…and said he loved him after…then and only then would Raito believe him.

Raito couldn't help but feel a bit cynical about _L_ _loving him_. His mind kept saying that it was only a ill-timed lust that L felt for him…even though his heart was begging for it to be true and not some cruel lie that fate had made up for him to suffer more then he currently was.

Raito shook these thoughts from his head, now wasn't the time for such sulking, he had to much to deal with already then contemplate his love life or more specifically his complicated lack of one. He looked over at L and had to snuff a chuckle.

L was still pouting childishly but he nodded his head once he saw Raito look at him. He seemed to understand what Raito meant, it was at these times that Raito couldn't help but love and hate at the same time. When L could read him to the point where his thoughts and feelings felt like an open book to the detective.

L seemed to have cooled down enough from the unexpected yet not so surprising make-out session. Raito could see in his eyes that his calculating mind was beginning to sharpen as his body tamed itself again.

"Ok Raito-kun I understand, and yes I was awake, well kind of anyway, I had long ago perfected a sort of half-sleep that helps me rest my body and my mind while also keeping me aware of my surroundings. It's only rarely when I'm really tired do I truly sleep like everyone else. But I don't dream…at least I normally don't…anyway…to get back to our current problem..."

"…I had asked Watari to disable the cameras in this room earlier but I don't know long Watari will be able to hold off the team's curiosity and fear for your safety. I believe they will try to overpower him and turn the cameras back on. I know this but I don't fear for Watari, I told him earlier that he would not fight back if that were to happen. We need to go to a secure location for our _talk_. I don't believe it would be wise to disclose any information about you until we had a chance to sort things out ourselves."

Raito was slightly overwhelmed at the thought of his father and the others being concerned for him, but once he thought about it for a second it really wasn't that much of a stretch to imagine. With his latest idiotic actions they most likely thought that L couldn't possibly be right about Raito being Kira…when it had really in fact sealed Raito's fate as Kira.

Raito was grateful that L seemed willing to put the discussion of weather L loved him or not on hold, at least until they had the time and private space to speak of such matters…or more accurately yell at each other.

"L…as much as I really don't want to even think about it, why don't we go back to _that room_?"

L snorted at Raito's obvious dislike of the white room they had stayed in before when L tried to get Raito to confess about his name…they may have been unaware of it at the time but it had been the start of something momentous that neither of them had predicted.

"Because Raito-kun, I know for a fact that Watari is also really worried for you, you _did_ save his life not an hour ago, also like the rest of the team he doesn't know what I plan to do, neither does he know some of the things that I do…the reason why we can't go to the white room Raito-kun because Watari already knows about it. It wouldn't surprise me if he has already placed hidden cameras in there in the hopes that I drag you in there to talk. No Raito-kun, we need to go to a place where no one would think that we would go to."

As Raito thought about what L said he saw that he had a point. Watari did seem the sort to do that if he was truly worried. He trusted L; there was no doubt about that. But still he would want to make sure that neither of them got hurt and to do that he would need to see and hear things that he really had no business hearing or seeing.

Raito was suddenly hit with an idea. It was so simple yet at the same time…it took most of his control not to start laughing out loud at the uncomplicated answer to all their worries on finding a place to hide out until they were ready to face everyone.

"Why don't we just go home?"

The look on L's face caused Raito to lose his control over himself, letting the laughter that wanted to break out come forth in pure untainted mirth.

---

"I'm not so sure about this Raito-kun."

Raito turned to look at L, causing the silvery chain that connected them to clink. L had reapplied it to both of their wrists before they snuck out of the headquarters structure. Raito didn't mind, it just gave him the excuse to walk closer to L.

"L think about it, would my dad or Watari suspect that we would be hiding out at my families home? It's the perfect place to hide out until tomorrow."

"But Raito-kun what about your mother and sister? Won't they be at home as well? I think that we should be alone when we have our…discussion."

"That's the beauty of it, it's Saturday. It doesn't matter that they were almost attacked last night. My mother always go to her Saturday meeting with her book club, what my father doesn't know is that she doesn't come home till the next morning. The book club is more of a cover story really. My mother and her friends go out to relax and get drunk at a spa about 2 hours away. She would have already left earlier this afternoon, and my sister always stays at one of her friend's houses on Saturdays because I mom's not home to cook dinner and Sayu always says my cooking sucks. Sooo…you get what that means right?"

Raito smiled at L as they pulled over in the SUV a few feet from his house. Raito watched as L started to smirk in acknowledgement.

"We'll have the house all to ourselves."

Raito leer at him in respond.

"Let's go inside…I'm sure we could find some of my father's aged scotch to help us relax enough to talk…well at least I hope it will help _me_ relax."

L gave his an understanding look and nodded.

"Come on Raito-kun, we have much to discuss."

"I know L, I know."

---

"So Raito-kun where's this aged scotch that you were talking about?"

Raito rolled his eyes as he let out a sigh; he walked into the kitchen dragging L behind him. He walked up to one of the cabinets on the far wall, he then opened it and reached inside; pushing the food products aside as his father's stash of alcohol came into view in the far back of the cabinet.

"Geez L who would have thought that a childish sweet tooth like yourself would drink something like alcohol? There is some soda and sugary drinks in the fridge that my sister drinks for you if you prefer."

L shot Raito a look that showed that he was not amused.

"Ha, ha Raito-kun very funny, incase it has escaped your keen senses of deduction I'm well over the drinking age limit. I've had my fair share of alcohol in my life thank you; while it's not my first choice in drink I can appreciate the side effects of alcohol. Sometimes in my line of work you can't help but want to dull your mind after some sort of gruesome case."

Raito nodded his head in understanding and sympathy. He knew what L meant, it was the reason that this alcohol was here in the first place. Sometimes when his father came home from a terrible case that he had been working on he would just take the bottle into his study and not come out for hours.

The rest of the family has learned that it was best not to bother him when he did that. Sometimes it was for the best just to wallow a bit in your own gloominess for a while, although his mother and Sayu never let his father sulk for long. They always managed to dragged him out a few hours later, then they would grab Raito and go out to do something together. Usually they would go to the nearby park; it was a relaxing place that made his father smile, which in turn made everyone happy.

"I apologize L, I did not mean it to sound like that, I just never seen you drink or eat anything that wasn't overflowing with sugar."

L just shook his head and grabbed the small bottle that Raito was holding loosely in his hand. He then turned around and started to walk out of the kitchen causing Raito to stumble in surprise. Luckily enough Raito was able to regain his balance before his face became intimate with the kitchen floor. Shooting L's back a black look he hurried after L who hadn't even paused in his strive.

Raito started to wonder where L was heading; he guessed his room when L started to drag him up the stairs in the direction of his room. He proved correct as L walked up to his door and opened it.

Raito walked quietly into the room behind L and closed the door; the atmosphere had suddenly turned very tense as soon as L had grabbed the alcohol from Raito in the kitchen.

Raito walked passed the still form of L who had stopped moving a few feet from the door and was looking around the room in interest.

Raito snorted, and flopped onto his bed, laying down with his hands cupping his head, he stared at L who was still looking around like he had never seen Raito's room before. But Raito knew better and he would have thought that L knew that to, after all L had told Raito himself that he had put the cameras in his room before.

"I don't know how you can find anything in this room interesting L, you already seen everything in detail in this room, what with all those camera's that where in here, you probably know my room more then I do. You invaded my privacy for a week, watching me constantly…and I might as well say that it was very stalkish of you to do that in the first place. No matter that you suspected me to be Kira, it was a very pervert like thing to do, not only did you watch me which was bad enough but you also kept tabs on mom and Sayu to. Now that's just plain wrong."

L turned his head sharply from where he had been observing Raito's desk to look at Raito. His eyes had sharpened intensely and Raito was getting the feeling that he had just done something incredibly stupid.

Finally L spoke, and as he did Raito felt like suffocating himself with his pillow that was laying a few inches away from him.

"Raito-kun…I have never once mentioned to you anything about the cameras that I had placed in here…how do you find out about the cameras Raito-kun and how long have you known about them?"

'Oh god I can't be this stupid…I was sure that L had already mentioned the cameras…let's see, when was it...'

And suddenly Raito remembered, in his pervious life L had mentioned the cameras to Raito when he had placed the cuffs on his the first time…but so much had changed that L had never gotten the chance to tell him this time around, instead of L's sadistic plan of his father pretending to shoot him Raito got placed in that godforsaken white _room_ with L, and he and L and only gotten handcuffed this morning instead of the day before…everything was so mixed up that Raito was mixing his past with his current present, causing him to react to things that haven't happen or what might never happen.

"Umm…well you see L…"

Raito couldn't for the life of him come up with a believable answer; his head was spinning a bit from realizing that he had done something so stupid, stupid enough that it made even Matsuda look smart. He sat up and placed his hanging head in his hands, how could he possibly explain without sounding like a complete nuthouse?

Raito was startled out of his thoughts by having a bottle pushed into his face; he stared at the amber liquid then turned his gaze up to L, who was looking at him with a blank expression on his face.

"Drink Raito-kun, it will help to calm your mind some, maybe it would make things easier for us both if I explain first."

Raito let out a sigh of relief; he was glad that he didn't have to try to explain how he knew about the cameras at the moment. But he was more then a little nervous as well as apprehensive in what L had to say.

L walked the small distance that separated them and sat next to Raito, he then flopped backwards much like how Raito had done earlier. Raito stared as he saw L stretch out on his bed and look up to the ceiling with a look that Raito couldn't decipher.

"Raito-kun…earlier after you passed out in that room…ok, ok more like I knocked you out, Watari and I carried you to the floor that you and I would be sharing from now on, I placed your unconscious body to bed and went to sleep myself, I was surprisingly tired, usually I can stay awake for a week without any type of sleep or rest but I guess to much had happened that it wore me out or something like that…anyway the point is that I slept Raito-kun, I slept and I dreamed…"

Raito was captivated; L's face might have still been in its detective mask which was vacant of emotion but his voice…his voice screamed of emotion. Of loneliness, of weariness, of sadness, of wonder, of acceptance, and of a peculiar contentment as well.

Raito asked the question that would bring everything to the open, which would bring truths and facts out from both of them. No more hiding, no more lies.

"What did you dream Lawliet?"

"I dreamed Raito…of a world that had been turned to dust, of the screams of the dead…I dreamed Raito of a world that was no more…"

Raito inhaled sharply, no this was not happening, how could L have dreamed that?!

"…I also dreamed Raito about a little girl dressed in white…she came out of nowhere as I laid there on the red tinted ground bounded and helpless to the stop the horrors in front of me…"

Horror was growing in Raito, as well as astonishment as L mentioned a little girl dressed in white, could it be?

"She stood there as the dust of crimson blown around us, untouched by the surrounding stench of death and decay; she had the saddest expression on her face, so sad that it made me want to cry just seeing it…I remember her touching my face, wiping away my tears…and as soon as she touched me I felt a strange shift around me, she had taken me away from that dead world, I'm not to sure where we were because I couldn't take my eyes off her but I remember feeling…content to be where I was."

Raito inhaled deeply as L took a breath in pause, when L reached out his hand without taking his eyes from the ceiling Raito obliged in giving him of the bottle, when Raito handed it over he was shocked to see that almost half of the bottle was drained. It seemed that he had been gulping the drink down while L talked.

L didn't say anything about the half filled bottle and just swallow a huge portion himself. He didn't give the bottle back though and Raito was half angry and half relived for that, he was already feeling the slight buzz from what was already in his system.

As the seconds ticked by without L resuming his story Raito decided to push slightly.

"L what was it the girl said to you?"

Without once looking at Raito L resumed his tale.

"I don't know how much time passed in my dream world as we just stood there staring at each other…it seemed like it was years while it was more likely only seconds, finally she spoke to me…her voice Raito, it was so beautiful yet…well it's hard to explain…"

Raito absently nodded, he knew exactly what L was trying to say, he to had been in awe of the Little Mother's voice as well, because that was who L was talking about, Raito was sure of it. The question was…why would the Little Mother talk to L? He had thought that she and the King would have died when they sent him back, it was only just know starting to flow in his mind that it had been his pervious life's Little Mother and Shinigami King that had died, the gods from this time-line or alternate dimension were still alive…really it was enough to give Raito a headache to be truthful just thinking about all the explanations that could explain the Little Mother's guest appearance in L's dream world.

"…she had said I would have a choice that I needed to make in the future. I would have to choose between two different paths, one she showed me that would lead to the world as I had seen it, dead and dust, a world of nothing at all. She wouldn't show me what the other choice was, nor what would happen if I choose that one, only that it would end in love and forgiveness."

"I remember being puzzled over that, how could two paths be so different? I was also angry that she had placed me in such a huge predicament, I remember thinking why me? Why did only I have to decided what would happen to the world? I know I may a bit of an egoist but even I didn't want such a large responsibility placed on my shoulders."

"I remember her laughing a cheerless sort of laugh when these self-pitying thoughts ran through my head. She then stated that I was _not_ the only one. Someone else was making the same sort of choice, just like I was. She wouldn't tell me who it was or what that person had chosen but somehow I knew…I knew that only you Raito-kun would be able to make that kind of choice with me…it was then that I sort of figured out what was happening."

"I still hadn't quite chosen my path but I knew one thing for sure…I didn't want the world to end like that. Humans may have done some horrible things in the past and in our current present now, and I know we will continue doing horrible stuff in the future but still…I didn't believe that we deserved such a fate as what I saw. She smiled at me as my resolve hardened, and told me I would make my choice when the time was right, until then…I woke up after that Raito-kun, truthfully I don't know why so much weird stuff is happening to you, but when you got shot by Matsuda…and passed out I knew then…I don't want you to die Raito, I don't know if leaving you alive is the right choice…but it's my choice and I'm going to stick with it, I know you're Kira, and I know you have certain supernatural abilities. It was only after reading that Lifenote of yours that I was able to figure some stuff out."

"But I'm also still confused…that notebook of yours saves lives apparently…but I thought I was under the impression that Kira's weapon killed."

Raito's head was spinning, how could this have happened? But even though Raito's head felt like it was exploding and he was having trouble breathing one thing was for sure, L Lawliet knew he was Kira yet he still wanted to save him…L cared for him enough where he would risk himself for Raito, because if anyone found out that L was saving a criminal, a serial killer, L would be lucky himself if he didn't get on death row next to Raito.

Raito took a deep breath, he now knew that L really didn't know anything, he just was going on instinct and his own emotions, and while Raito found that hard to believe, _this was L, _he could at least appreciate it. He knew that the Little Mother had given him an opening, a chance. He could tell L the truth, maybe not every little thing, he wasn't quite ready for that, but he could tell him about how he became Kira…and how he wasn't quite from this time-line exactly.

A thought came to him suddenly, what had happened to his Lifenote? He knew that L had read it because he had just said that had read the rules in it…so…

"Hey L, what happened to the Lifenote? You didn't leave it at headquarters did you?"

He looked at L who crocked his eyebrow at him.

"You're going to ignore my question? Well since I'm such a great guy I'll answer yours, I have it here under my shirt."

Raito watched as L reached under his large shirt and pulled out the familiar white notebook, he then held it out for Raito to take. Raito reached with out his hands which he noticed where very faintly shaking.

After the notebook was back in his hands, Raito could feel muscles start to relax that he didn't even know was tense to begin with. Having the Lifenote back in his possession was like a part of him that he hadn't even known had been missing was back now. He felt complete.

He looked up from the white note in his hands to the detective that was lying on his bed; waiting for him…waiting for him to open himself just like the insomniac had done for him.

"Sorry L, I didn't mean to ignore your question, I was just thinking on how I can answer it."

L nodded his understanding and laid his head back down, pillowed by his hands. Raito realized it was a gesture to show that Raito could take as much time as he need to think about what he need to say. It was a very rare show of patience on L's part, but it made Raito feel twice as grateful.

Raito inhaled deeply, he didn't know how he was going to explain himself, hell he didn't even get it all himself. He was something that should never have existed in this world, he was part of it and yet at the same time not. He was human yet he was also a God of Death, something like him had never existed before that was for sure and he was also sure that one such as him would never exist again either. He was the only one of his kind, an entirely different species by himself…it kind of made him feel a bit lonely now that he thought about it.

'That must be why the Little Mother gave me that special gift…she knew how lonely my kind of existence would be like, so she decided to help me find someone to share the pain and happiness of eternity with. It may be something that I don't deserve but…I will take what I am given and never take it for granted.'

First thing first…he had to tell L about how he became Kira in the first place and about the Deathnote…everything after that will come in time, he need to see first if L could take his past before he knew about the present and the possible future.

Raito inhaled deeply one more time and closed his eyes, he steeled himself for possible rejection, he may know things about L that he didn't before, but he still couldn't predict what L's reaction to Raito's tale would be.

He turned his head to look at L who was still staring at Raito's white uninteresting ceiling; he couldn't help the small smile that crossed his face as he looked at L. The untamed black hair that while looked coarse was actually very soft and smooth to the touch. The pale skin while some might say made him look like an extra off some zombie movie was more of a moonlighted skin tone; it was easy to tell that he spent most of his time in front of a computer in a dark room instead of outside in the sun. L's thin yet lithe body was at least in Raito's eyes beautiful.

But the thing that captured Raito's eyes the most out of all of L's physically characteristics was his eyes. At first impression they both resembled a bottomless black pit. But Raito knew, they were a profound gray. They were like mirrors to L's soul and Raito was grateful at having the privilege of being one of the few to be able to read L's eyes. The feelings and emotions that L normally didn't show in his face or show in his body language, Raito was able to read it all in his eyes.

L Lawliet was not only beautiful in body and mind but he was the only one that Raito could call an equal in everything. In mind they shared the same intelligence and paranoia, they were able to think almost in sync when they were both weren't concentrating on the case, it got to the point that in Raito's past/future that they were able to tell the mood of the other just by a slight twitch, they even finished each others thoughts when speaking to the team about the Kira case…Raito wanted that back, but he wanted it to also to be something more then it was even then.

Well it was now or never, Raito swallowed harshly, for some reason his mouth had gone dry. He shrugged off any type of uncertainty and just started speaking, he knew that if he stopped at any point or even took the time to think on what he was saying he would stop and be unable to go on.

"L…having read the Lifenote you have most likely come to the conclusion that I'm no longer human…if so then you would be correct."

Raito had flopped back down beside L and was also staring at the uninteresting white ceiling of his, he didn't think that he would be able to tell L the truth while looking at him; he could tell that L realized this also as he wasn't pushing Raito to look at him.

"I'm no longer completely human anymore…but that's not to say that I'm not mostly human. But before I tell you about that and about the Lifenote I should start at the beginning shouldn't I? About how I became Kira…and about a notebook called a Deathnote…and how it ruined my life and the lives of others and birth to the being the world knows as the mass murderer Kira…but even though it ruined and destroyed countless lives it also gave me something in return that I can't help but think selfishly was worth all the pain and death."

"And what could this something be Raito-kun that you would think that millions of lives were worth it?"

"…You L, it gave me you…"

---

Ahhhh!!! I promise that I will have Raito explain everything in the next chapter, but I told you before that I'm kind of having writer's block so I need some time with it…it might be a while till my next update. Sorry. I just wanted to update this so badly that I just had to stop at the most convenient spot available to me.

This chapter sucked! That's all I can think when I reread this chapter for the 100th time.

Anyway please review and yet again I will try to make the next chapter better and Raito will be telling L about how he acquired the deathnote and everything after that, I will most likely summarize it because who really needs a recap of the entire Deathnote series?

Sorry yet again on taking forever to update but my life is busy and I haven't had the time to write nor have I really had the inspiration to.

Though…I have the really bad urge to write a Detective Conan/Magic Kaito story…I even have a rough draft done…though I don't know what the plot is yet…CX hmm…

Anyway please review and yet again I apologize for the really late update, let's all pray to the Goddess of Fanfiction and Yaoi that this horrible writer's block lifts soon eh?

Also I just noticed this as I was reading this for the 100th time...does this chapter seem kind of poetic to any of you? Because it seemed like that to me...waaayyy to OOC to me but...(shrugs) oh well...I guess I'm just a poet in heart.


	17. Chapter 17

Thank you all who reviewed! I luvs you all soooo much! HUGS!!

AikiaJuniper,- whoa, heh yes I'm alive, I've just been having major writer's block for the last couple of weeks, I even tried starting another story in a different category. Thanks for your support! XD

Sayoko's-fire,- It's ok! I tend to forget to review also so I never hold it against people to forget to review, (on the other hand people who don't want to review is a whole another story ;p) I'm sorry that my story can get a tad boring with the small amount of dialogue I have, I'm not good with dialogue so I tend to have more explanation and other forms of writing. I'll try to put more dialogue in my story but I can't make any promises. Thanks for reviewing!

Seethingkitsune,- hehe thank you so much! I'm so happy you liked my last chapter and I hope you enjoy this one as well! XD

Pink Feline,- Aww thank you! Yep writer's block can be a real pain in the behind nee? XP Hope that it leaves you as well as me, good luck on your stories, thank you so much for the review and support!

Kamerreon,- oh thanks for the tip, very helpful thanks! CX I'm glad you think I'm doing so well, hope that this chapter also does ok, thank you so much for the review!

Eternal Requiem,- Thanks! XD I'm glad that there are so many people out there who don't think my last chapter sucked, yes it was poetic huh? Hehe I guess that's ok though…it changes the pace somewhat.

Eiri and Kurama lover07,- …o.0…umm…ok?...hehe, wow sorry about that, but it was a nice ending for that chapter I thought. I don't want to you to suffer withdraw symptoms so here's the next chapter! XD

sKyhe,- Yep! I would have finished them sooner but I had to stop because the new episodes weren't out yet, ;-; hehe. I'm know watching Kyo Kara Moah, but every Tuesday night around 11 I get on-line to see the newest episode of Bleach. It's getting so good! XD I've actually cut back some since my high school days…I would go almost a full day without sleep so I could get my anime fix right after school. Me and my friends actually watched anime at school on our lunch break…good times, good times…

Blood-fire-dragon,- keep that hammer away from me and you can come over! XD I miss you! Thank you so much for the review! Cross your fingers and prey that this writer's block will end soon! XD

Pouf,- Thank you so much, I also hope that this writer's block will end soon, it's my new years wish for that to happen. Thank you for the review! XD

Kyrre25,- Aw thank you! Your review really helped me feel better about my anime addition right now and my writer's block(that doesn't mean I don't hate my writer's block, because I do, very much so.) Thanks so much for your review and I hope you enjoy this chapter! XD

ButterflyOnna77,- Ah I know, I know, I'm sorry about the long wait, but I have half of the explanations in this chapter, the rest will be in the next. I keep on telling people that this story will be really long…well I'm not kidding. XD

May or Yesterday,- thank you, we writer's have it tough huh? CX

Hunter Hatake and Neko Uchiha,- Thanks! XD I'm glad you're enjoying this.

Yoshiluvr,- aww thank you so much, it's reviews like yours that make me proud to be a fanfiction writer, XD

Dotti55,- Thank you, thank you, thank you!

TheSlashBunny,- yup! I kind of feel a bit sorry for L…while in a way it's really romantic what Raito said, on the other hand it is very twisted as well. I wouldn't know how to react well to that. Thanks for the review!

Isamu-michi,- I know, I know, I'll get to everyone's reactions sooner or later, most likely within the next few chapters. I might even go into one of the other characters point-of-views in one of the upcoming chapters. But L and Raito need this conversation in a bad way; they need to get it over with so I can get to the plot of this story already!

Vanity,- I'll never abandon this story…the updates might just take a while, my life is very hectic right now. Thanks for all of your support! XD

Black-Dranzer-1119,- Thanks! Glad you enjoyed it, hope you also like this chapter as well! XD

Toraus,- Yep, finals are evil incarnate…I'm studying for a final right now and I hate it! Headaches as become frequent in my life right now, thank you for the review and hope you enjoy this update!

---

The silence that descended around them after Raito's shocking response was more then slightly stifling. L just stared at Raito, as if he couldn't believe his ears. Not that Raito blamed him. He was basically just told by a mass murderer who L had been tracking for months that it was worth the lives of thousands of people just so that they would have met. He probably didn't know how to take that. Hell Raito didn't know how to take it and he was the one who felt it.

Finally it seemed that L had come to a decision to Raito's confession.

"I really don't know what to say to that Raito-kun, I do know that I love you and while I can possibly forgive you for you're…misdeeds I don't think that I will able to ever forget. I…I don't think that the lives that you have taken were worth us meeting like this. That may seem harsh and cruel of me Raito-kun but it's the truth. Who knows? Maybe even if Kira had never been created we would have met under different circumstances."

While Raito had been expecting this, he couldn't help the slight sting in his heart as he heard L talk. But he had been bracing himself for this type of respond and he was surprised that after that slight twinge of his heart he felt…well maybe not ok but he knew that he could accepted what L said wholeheartedly. L was L, he was justice and not even Raito could divert him far from that path, not that he would want to anyway, he was no longer Kira and no longer felt complied and obsessed with changing L's views. In fact he now agreed more with L's views then his old ones. He was no longer the naïve child that wanted to paint the world in his own image.

"…so Raito-kun…I was wondering if you can now explain to me about how you became Kira in the first place."

Raito lifted his head from where he had become lost in thought, he looked at the expecting face of L and sighed, nothing could slow L down when he wanted to know something, it had been foolish of Raito to even try, no matter that he didn't really want to talk about it, he knew he had to, especially if he wanted L to trust and believe in him.

'I kind of wish that Zaki was awake…but I don't really want to disturb him right now…besides I need to deal with this myself, if I can't even do this…how could I ever hope for redemption?'

Raito to a deep breath and locked eyes with L's dark ones, it was now or never.

"It all began when I was sitting in class, bored out of my mind; I turned my head to look out the window…"

---

Raito started telling L all about how he found the Deathnote and all the events that happened after that. Even about his feelings on finding the deathnote and using it for the first time, how sick and terrified he had been when he had first used it, believing that it had been nothing more then some elaborate joke. And finally he talked about how he had come to the decision that he would force his own ideals on the world, how he had become corrupt and power hungry.

He told L all about Ryuk and Rem being the shinigami's that were the true owners of the deathnotes and about how Misa was the second Kira and how she and Rem where technically blackmailing him to be her boyfriend, but he didn't dismiss his own involvement at all or try to shoulder all the blame onto Misa. He promised himself and L that he would tell the truth and he wasn't going back on his word anymore!

L seemed fascinated by all Raito was saying, his black eyes seemed at least twice as large as normal as he listen to Raito talk. He kept quite the entire time, though there were times that he looked like he wanted to say sometime he held his tongue. Raito had to admit that this strangely patient L was seriously freaking him out.

Raito paused in his tale; he had just gotten to the part when he had been locked up in the cell. This was the point where he had to choose, to either tell L all about how he was from a future that with hope and a huge amount of luck would never come to pass or to just end the tale here.

'What should I do? I need to tell him but…I really don't want to go to a quack house, though considering how he's taking the idea of a killer notebook and the existence of shinigami's maybe he'll take the idea of me being a time-traveling immortal hybrid of shinigami and human who is now trying to do the opposite of what I was as Kira, that I'm trying to save lives now instead of taking them.'

"Raito-kun?"

Raito started as he heard L call him, looking into L's worried eyes he realized that he was silent for to long.

Raito cough a little in embarrassment, he hadn't meant to get lost in thought again. It annoyed him that it seemed to be happening to him a lot lately.

"Umm…L? Before I continue I need to know how you're doing so far."

L gave him a disbelieving look, his eyebrows raised.

"Raito-kun…you've just told me that Kira the mass murderer that I've been hunting for months now…is a freaking notebook, I have to say me not throwing a tantrum and trashing your room shows how good I am."

Raito was confused and annoyed at the same time, he didn't know what L meant when he called the deathnote Kira, though in a way that was very accurate in a way he still couldn't figure if L believed him or not.

"L…in case you've forgotten _I'm Kira_."

L sat up and waved his hand in a dismissal manner which annoyed Raito further.

"Yes Raito-kun I know you were Kira in a way, but it seems to me that the real power and focus of Kira is this Deathnote, not you. The way I see it you were corrupted by the evil power, it shaped your while noble very foolish, childish dream of getting rid of crime and evil in the world and making a perfectly light world…it was a very irrational dream Raito-kun, but I know that you are a very optimistic person, no matter that you are arrogant and egotist, and I say because we are similar in that way. I have only a lot more experience in life Raito-kun; I know that the world can never be prefect like that…human emotions wouldn't allow that. There will always be darker emotions in the human physic to counter our more positive emotions…like love and affection."

"Raito-kun…you may have been a vessel of Kira, and you've used the Deathnote and caused the death of thousands…but the human heart has always been irrational…I know that I love you, and I would like to believe that you share that sentiment as well. I don't know how or why but…I believe that you are no longer Kira…it's not just a feeling in my heart that tells me this, although that is one part of it, but…I just had this feeling, like a weight had been lifted off my chest, it had been like having a death sentence hang over my head or something. But then suddenly it vanished, it happened the moment you collapsed in your cell screaming."

Raito stared in shock as L finally winded down from his…well Raito didn't know what to call it. Raito saw that L was looking at him like he was expecting Raito to say something, Raito opened his mouth not knowing what to say, but it seemed that his smart-ass mouth didn't care that his brain couldn't follow.

"…I think that's the most I've ever heard you speak at one time…"

Raito blushed in embarrassment, here L made a passionate speech to him and all he had to say was that. L didn't seem mad though, he just rolled his eyes in exasperation.

"You have such a way with words Raito-kun, now…shall we continue? Or do you want more time to decide if you want to tell me the rest of the story?"

Raito blushed harder as he was caught red handed. L was right though he needed to tell him the rest of the story, nuthouse house or no nuthouse.

"Well L the truth is…I'm not entirely the Yagami Raito you know from before...before you put me in that cell that is."

L raised an eyebrow and shot Raito a look of disbelief.

"You want to explain what you mean by that Raito-kun?"

Raito took a deep breath, now how to explain that everything? How should he go about it? Raito had an idea brewing in his head, it was still very hazy and he hadn't had the time to harsh it out but…

"Well…hmm…I guess it would be easiest to show you instead."

"Oh?"

"Yes…so L…I want you to knock me unconscious."

"…"

"…"

"E-excuse me!?"

---

I'm so sorry that this is so short! But I needed to get this up; because I've been so busy lately I try to update whatever I have written down as quickly as possible. So sorry about that! I will have the rest of what was suppose to be in this chapter up as soon as I can in the next chapter!

It most likely won't be until sometime in January, after new years, but I'll try to have at least the next two or so chapters written up by then so I can upload them for all of you.

Do you want to know what's really stupid? I haven't even gotten to the plot of this story yet! Yep! Up till now all of my chapter's have been technically filler chapters…this story's going to at least be 40 to 50 chapters…urg!

So what do you all think? I'm sorry that L and Raito are so OOC, but I just can't seem to keep them in-character, at least when they are having heart-to-heart confessing conversations. Oh well…

Can anyone guess what Raito's plan is to show L? hmm? Hehe I bet a lot of you can figure it out. The conclusion of the explanations will be in the next chapter, and then I might, _might _do a special chapter on everyone else's point-of-views of what happened when Matsuda shot Raito.

So Review please! **Review! Review! Review! PLEASE!**


	18. Chapter 18

I'm so sorry! I know I promised everyone that I would have the next chapter out by New Years but…I forgot my laptop at home when I went on vacation late December!! And when I got home finally…well the new school semester was starting in about a week and I was scrambling to get my books and stuff ready that I completely forgotten my fanfictions for a while…I'm very, very sorry!

Thank you all who have reviewed and had had the patience to not hunt me down at gun point to get this next chapter out, sorry for the long wait. Since I want to get this chapter out as soon as possible now that I've finished it, I'm just going to thank you all at once this time instead of individually. Sorry. If anyone has any specific questions about anything please feel free to PM me or ask me to respond to you in a review.

**Jesus-of-suburbia2o2o, Zaidee, Shinimoeru, Vanity, SeethingKitsune, Sayoko's-fire, Black-Dranzer-1119, C Elise, Yoshiluver, Dotti55, TheSlashBunny, Pouf, Alabirdie, Eiri and Kurama lover07, Blood-Fire-Dragon**_(Who this chapter is dedicated to.)_**, ButterflyOnna77, Isamu-michi, Interstella, Toraus, ElementalFoxGoddess, Hurako, Nightwing Gurl, Littleone4u, TimeTravelFreak, Mistress Rei, Barranca, Reanna-Kris-Katelyn**

_**I love you all!!!**_

Finally! The Truth is out!!

---

_**Last Time on 'Darkness within your Light'-**_

_Raito took a deep breath, now how to explain that everything? How should he go about it? Raito had an idea brewing in his head, it was still very hazy and he hadn't had the time to harsh it out but…_

"_Well…hmm…I guess it would be easiest to show you instead."_

"_Oh?"_

"_Yes…so L…I want you to knock me unconscious."_

"…"

"…"

"_E-excuse me!?"_

----

Raito couldn't help but feel a sense of bemusement at L's uncharacteristic reaction to what even Raito knew had to be a very odd request given the circumstances…hell it was strange under _any_ circumstances.

"I don't believe I stuttered L. I asked you to hit me, preferably hard enough to knock me unconscious."

L was looking at him as if he finally believed that Raito had lost his mind. Raito thought it was more then slightly amusing and a tad unsettling that L only thought he was crazy when he asked for L to purposely strike him…but not when he told him about a notebook that can kill a human being just by writing a single name in it and apple addicted deathgods.

'You'd think that even with all this craziness that has been happening to both him and me lately that he would at least be more skeptical then he is right now…I mean what proof does he have that anything I'm saying right now is the truth? I mean it is but other then that weird dream he had how can be believe me so easily? The way he's putting so much trust in me right now…it is more then a tad disturbing. I mean he says he loves me but…how can he say that so easily…oh to hell with it! Let's just see how well he takes my TRUE form first before I try to judge his sanity level.'

"Look L, I'm not crazy nor am I trying to get out of telling you the entire truth. It's just that I have a rational reason for asking you to do this…but it would sound too crazy if I just try to tell you…so I would rather try to show you what I mean instead. Trust me it would make explaining the rest of it much easier for the both of us."

"But Raito-kun…how can you really ask me to do that now? You still have a slight concussion from the last time I hit you and that was accidental…I don't want to hurt you anymore, especially if it's on purpose. I'm…I'm just…"

L looked so confused and distressed with his indecision of whether he should do as Raito said, taking the risk of hurting him to find out the truth that he had sought for so long…or if he should follow his emotions and new conviction to let no harm come to Raito anymore…it was so unlike the L that Raito had use to know from his own time-line that Raito couldn't help it. He laughed. Hard.

He couldn't help it, L wasn't acting like a world renowned detective…no instead he was acting like how any other human being would react in this situation…quickly Raito realized his mistake. L may be a genius detective who almost seemed to be inhuman with the way he dealt with cases and his lack sociality, but it was so easy to forget sometimes… L Lawliet _was_ human.

He wasn't dealing with the world renown detective L right now…no he was dealing with someone much more precious and mystifying…the human L Lawliet that had been buried inside of the socially and emotionally deprived detective.

Though he quickly stopped when he realized his mistake he gulped as he saw the flush of anger and humiliation grow on L's face, he became so captivated by L's usual pale skinned face turn a shade of red that could only be called rosy…so he wasn't prepared for when L quickly stood up with a look of betrayal on his face.

It only took Raito about three seconds to realize what was about to happen, and while it was what he had wanted in the first place…he didn't want it done in anger. Raito realized that he had better apologize quickly with an explanation, but it seemed that L was too embarrassed by Raito laughing in his face to listen.

"Wait L I didn't m-"

"No Yagami, you want to be knocked out? Then so be it!!"

It happened so fast, Raito never saw the fist coming at all. One moment he was staring up at L's red face and the next…oblivion.

---

Once more Raito found himself swimming in darkness, but unlike last time he was now aware of what was happening and where he was.

'Well this is it…there's no going back now. Any minute now I'm going to awake in my shinigami body…and L will see me the new…_no the real me_.'

'I just pray to any god out there that's still living or existing right now…that L won't freak out before I can explain myself first. Though the way he was pissed at me before hand…well I hope he doesn't try to kick me…not that it would hurt me since I'm about 90 percent sure it would just faze through but he might seriously hurt himself if he's not careful.'

Raito sighed…or at least he sighed as much as any disembody person could in this black space. The only thing he could do in this place was to hope and pray as much as he was able…which wasn't that much to begin with anyway. He had never been much of the praying type when he had been a normal human, mostly it had to do with him not believing that any disembodied entity that idiots and fanatics worshiped could ever grant any wishes or prayers he had…not that he had had any to begin with, when Raito wanted something he got it, he didn't spend wasteful minutes of his life wishing for something. Raito may have change a lot since his rebirth from his original self…but there was just some things that would never-could never change within him.

His large ego and his superiority complex where some of the many traits that would never go away, but they were some of the many things that made Raito…Raito. He figured that anyone who didn't like those things about him might as well not like him at all. So if L didn't like that…well…

Just the thought of L not accepting him made Raito want to cry, he was betting it all in this one gamble, if it didn't go as planned…

'_Geez Raito, aren't you just a wretched little emo today.'_

"Wha?!"

Raito felt a jolt of shock as a voice sounded around the darkness. It only took him a second to get over it though and realize who it was. As soon as the shock wore off he felt a sense of relief and annoyance flood him. Relief because for some reason whenever Zaki was around he couldn't help but feel a sense of safety and companionship while talking to him. What annoyed him though was the way that Zaki sometimes spoke to him. How he never sugar coated his words and how outspoken he was whenever he found fault in Raito.

"Don't you think I have a reason to be kind of depressed Zaki? You do know what's at stake right? If L decides to…"

'…_to...what? Reject you? For the love of the King and Mother…geez, look Raito I can see that you need a talking to right now so I have only one thing to say to you right now and that's…WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO YOU?! You are Yagami Raito! The Former Kira and A Deathnote user and one of the most intelligent human being that has ever existed on the face of the earth! You would have never let something like this effect you like this! You are a strong, unaffected, and I hate to say it but boarding on a sociopath human, who's beliefs where all most unshakable. Take a good look at yourself right now Raito…do you like how weak you sound? I know that you have changed…and I know that it has mostly to do with L and all the experience and events and trials that you have undergone in your life and afterlife. But you forget Raito…you are now one with the prideful shinigami race. I know you may not think that's much to take pride in, but before the shinigami's had wasted away into a desert wasteland, they use to be demigods, only second to the gods themselves. They use to be worshiped and praised by humans eons ago…I've only existed for a few centuries now so what I've learned about the history of the race of the shinigami I've only heard from the King and the Little Mother when they created me because well…all the other shinigami and the other races had already died out by the time I was created…'_

'…_anyway Raito please, take some time to think about how you are acting, and what you are feeling right now. I know you love L and want him to accept you so you can be with him but…you have to prepare yourself that you might not get the happy ending you want. If anyone deserves it you do but you know just as much as I do that reality doesn't work that way…even if…even if things don't work out, you know I'm here for you right? I'll always be here with you Raito, from now on until the end of days. I hope for your sake that L Lawliet will be able to accept you…and for the sake of this world as well. You are prideful, smart and beautiful man Raito, it's time you find yourself again and remember there are more things at stack right now then your love life.'_

Raito never thought that he could be more shocked to silence then he was right now. Zaki's impassionate speech cut through him like a bucket of ice water.

'He's right…oh my god…what happened to me? I can't help but feel both elation and disgust at my behavior. I'm acting like any other normal human being would feel and act…but goddamn it! I'm not a normal human being at all! I-I don't want to change anymore but…I know that Zaki's right, I can feel trouble brewing and my relationship with L must come second. If he can accept me-well that would be great! But if he can't…I'll have to accept that for now and hold on any of those seduction plans I had in mind if things turned sour when I revealed myself…'

Raito stomped down hard onto the sudden rush of dirty thoughts; he understood now what Zaki was trying to say, it was like all those teenage hormones that he had suppress when he was human had come back to him ten forth, and sadly he didn't have the time to deal with it, nor the time to sort out the new feelings and emotions as well.

"…Zaki, thank you. I know that there are more important things at stake then my love life and I'm…sorry that I got sidetracked. I do know that you will be with me; you are like a piece of me, a part that L could never reach. I would be lost without you… I guess what I'm trying to say is that you're like my better half and I ah-thank you."

Raito was at a lost of words to express his gratitude and fondness to his Lifenote. But luckily for him it seemed Zaki understood.

'_Ah it's so much fun to see you at a lost for words…heh especially if it's because you can't find the right way to say what your feeling. Don't worry Raito, I understand just fine. I hope things work out, I truly do; and hopefully quickly. I can't tell you exactly what's going on but…something truly bad is going to happen Raito…be careful.'_

Before Raito had the chance to think more on what Zaki was trying to warn him about he felt his mind go haze…this was it, there was no turning back now…he just hoped that he wouldn't come to regret his decision…to be completely truthful and honest with someone else, no hiding himself anymore.

---

The first thing that Raito became aware of was heavy silence; he soon became aware that he was floating upside down in the air because he could feel his long shinigami hair was pulling upward away from his face instead of trying to cover it liked it usually tried to. His eyes where still closed, giving the illusion of still being in that protective darkness.

But no…even with the absent of sound Raito knew that he had separated from his human body, so he was now a thin, straight jacket wearing, grey winged shinigami once more and anyone who had ever touched his lifenote would now be able to see him as clear as day. He knew that it was a lot to accept or to even conceive but…what was L doing? Why wasn't he saying something? Raito had to confess that he would rather have woken up to screams of terror then this…silence.

Raito slowly opened one of his eyes a creak and looked down where he knew that L should be…what he saw made him blink his eyes a few times rapidly before then widening almost too comically proportions as the situation finally caught up with his brain it also had the effect of making his jaw drop. A thing that he would later deny had ever happen.

It took a few seconds to process what he was seeing but he couldn't help the small smile that overtook his face. Even with the warning growl that sounded below him.

For what Raito saw as he looked down was L crouched protectively over Raito's unconscious human form, one arm was wrapped around Raito's waist while the other one was raised as if to attack. A fierce expression covered L's usual unreadable face as he faced what he thought was a threat.

It seemed that L hadn't realized quite yet who he really was.

Raito made a note almost absentmindly that he was floating close to his bedroom ceiling, luckily it made him well out of the vicious L's arm and leg reach. Even if he was sure that any attack would just faze through him, Raito would rather not chance it, with his luck L would found find out some unconceivable way to land a hit on him.

Raito didn't really know how to deal with this, out of all the possible scenarios that Raito had come up with he had never thought of this one. Though it did make him feel pleased inside to see that L's first priority had been to protect him, even as an unknown entity appeared in front of him, an entity that shouldn't even exist according to L's atheist ways despite Raito's tales of shinigamis and gods and other worlds.

As Raito tried to think of a way to calm L down enough to listen to him explain himself he didn't see L's eyes watching and moving over him keenly and critically, nor did he see L switch his gaze back and forth between his knocked out human form and his shinigami one.

He also totally missed L's eyes widen as he came to a sudden conclusion. Raito was so deep in thought that he didn't see L stand up slightly from his defensive crouch and gently set his nonresponsive body on his bed and rearrange it to his satisfaction. After that he slowly started to move towards the still oblivious shinigami.

Raito only became aware of his surroundings when he felt his long hair start to gently be tugged. When he realized that he had become lost in thought for who knows how long he felt like blushing, luckily for him it seemed like his unnaturally pale skin didn't redden that well so instead of his face turning a shade of red only found in blood, his face redden into a pale pink that unknowingly to him made him really cute looking.

It seemed L thought so at least if the small striking smile tugging at his lips was anything to go by…it captivated Raito so much that he didn't realize that his wings had started to fold up automatically when he no longer felt a sense of apprehension of L's reaction.

With a yelp he fell the six feet to the ground, luckily landing on his feet because of his shinigami reflexes that allowed his to turn right side up quickly enough so he didn't land on his head instead. He would most likely have died on the principle alone if he had done that and with L standing there watching him with a sort of bemused smirk on his face…well let's just say that even Raito would have wished for a heart attack to overtake him if that had happened. Luckily for him it wasn't the case as he landed quite safely down on the ground.

He stood a few feet away from L; he noted in mild fascination that he stood at least a foot or two taller then L. He tried to keep his face inexpressive as much a possible. Raito had come to the conclusion while he had been floating before that he should let L make the first move…he just hoped that it wasn't L's martial art form of capoiera that would be speaking.

Raito watched as L's snarky expression turn into a passive expression, but he wasn't fooled. He saw the calculations in L's eyes, he watched in fascination, because even when he had been Kira he had been captivated by L's eyes, especially when he was calculating and thinking. They showed the most life when the brilliant mind behind them was working overtime.

After what seemed as if an eternity had passed while in reality it had only about five minutes did L finally made his move.

Raito watched as a look of uncertainty passed on L's face before a look of determination quickly took its place. L seemed to brace himself a bit, and squared his shoulders determinedly. Raito was shocked to see L once again for the second time straighten fully from his hunched position and stand tall. At this height Raito now was only a foot taller then L.

"…Raito-kun?"

A feeling of something passed through Raito, he didn't know what it was but the sense of giddiness made him feel a bit faint.

Maybe…just maybe…

"Yes L…it's really me."

---

The silence that overtook them after Raito's affirmative only lasted about five seconds before it was broken.

"Well fuck..."

Raito couldn't stop his smirk.

"Couldn't have summed it better myself if I'd tried. So L…I imagine that you might have a few questions for me huh?"

This time it was L who smirked.

But Raito couldn't but notice the way L shook ever so slightly, or the way his voice wavered or the way that the smirk on his face looked totally fake, as if he was trying to hard to stay calm.

It took Raito a second to come to a sad, conclusion…L was afraid…afraid of him.

'…Oh Lawliet…'

Raito took a deep breath and harden his resolve. L might be afraid right now and truthfully he had every right to be afraid but…Raito had this one chance right now. A chance to show L that there was no reason to be afraid, at least not of him.

Raito turned and walked a few feet towards the wall opposite of L, he moved around a bit so he could comfortable lean his back fully against the wall, he was able to fully face L this way. He crossed his arms and waited for L to figure out what he was doing.

L, who had been standing beside the bed where Raito's human body was lying, flinched ever so slightly at seeing Raito move. Raito wondered how he looked to L…was he ugly? He knew L was scared of him but he didn't know if it was the situation that L was scared of or him personally.

L spent a minute or so just analyzing and watching him, like he was making sure that Raito wasn't going to do anything else unexpected. L finally seemed to realize what Raito wanted him to do; Raito felt relief as he heard a chuckle of amusement come from L as he moved to the wall opposite of Raito; the only thing between them now was Raito's bed.

It was a recreation of their time in the white room; where they had faced each other from across the room, only this time they weren't locked in, nor was it unfurnished, and this time…there will be no lies or hidden truths spoken between them.

Raito decided to start off by picking up where he had left off before…by telling L all about their past life together…but first…

"L before I can explain what I am I have to finish my explanation from where I left off, you see…this is actually the second time I've lived on this earth…although the first time definitely didn't go this way."

L just raised his eyebrow in a 'go on' gesture.

"Well L it's like this…"

So Raito started to talk, he talked about how he had lost his memories as planned when he had been imprison by L. How he had become passionate about catching Kira and bringing justice to what he thought was a murdering psychopath, he even told L about L's fake execution when he had Raito's father pretend to shoot him. Raito was amused that L interrupted him and apologized.

"There's no real reason to apologize L, it's not like you did it this time, and at least I didn't spend 5 months in that cell this time so I guess it works out…though that white room you subjected me to was almost as bad, anyway remember this L whatever happened last time did just that, it happened in a different time-line. It now has no real effect in this world now. Whatever you did or I did at that time doesn't matter anymore."

Raito couldn't help but feel a sense of embarrassment as he told L all about how L had handcuffed him last time, about how Raito had demanded separate beds, and even about how his more innocent self had tried to tame his L into eating healthy food.

Raito smiled as L laughed right out at that.

"I hope Raito-kun that you are smart enough this time to not try that again."

"Oh I don't know L…I got you eat asparagus."

"Ewwww!! There's no way you could have done that unless you fought me to the ground and held my nose closed so I would have been forced to open my mouth to breath…though I imagine that I would have most likely chosen to suffocate instead."

Raito laughed at L's scrunched up face as he imagined having to be forced to eat such healthy gross food.

"Well close…I bribed you with chocolate covered strawberries dipped in home made whipped cream…"

L raised an eyebrow as Raito trailed off.

"And..? I know you must have done something else for me as well, I may love chocolate strawberries but I don't believe I would have eaten…that stuff even for them."

Raito could feel a slight flush rise on his face as he thought of what he had to do to make L eat the green food.

"Well your right that the strawberries themselves weren't enough of a bribe to make you eat the asparagus so…I proposed that I would hand feed you the strawberries…while wearing a gag so you couldn't hear the degrading comments I made about you in retaliation."

"…"

"Raito-kun, you have my permission to try to bribe me again."

Raito flushed even more as L started to leer at him. Well at least L seemed more relaxed now so Raito could forgive that it was at him having to reveal something that had greatly humiliated him at the time…now though…

Raito blushed and coughed a bit as a string of dirty images and thoughts flew through his mind, with more inner strength then he thought he had he was able to halt them before L noticed.

"Shut up L. Anyway as I was saying…"

Raito quickly changed the subject to tell L all about the months chasing the third Kira Kyosuke Higuchi and the Yotsuba group that had killed for political and business reasons, and about the fight of morals and ethics that had made the investigation members spilt up into two groups for a while, he told L all about how they had tricked the third Kira into revealing himself and then he told L all about what happened to them in the helicopter and about finding the Deathnote and the Shinigami Rem…he told L all about how he regained his memories of being Kira and how after that it was like the human aspect in him had died.

Raito couldn't help but falter a bit as he came close to _that_ day…November 5th…the day that L had died, and the day that humanity had truly left Kira…had left Yagami Raito.

"It was about a month after I had killed the third Kira and regained ownership of the deathnote that you unveiled your plan to test out the deathnote, I have to admit L, I couldn't tell if it was because of your pride was damaged or just your unwavering conviction and certainty that I was Kira that made you want to do such a reckless thing. Though it was all going according to my plan I couldn't help but feel a sense of disappointment that you fell into it so easily. Misa was already killing criminals in my name by then and I remember how she always tried to complain to me about Ryuk…about how she was spending too much of her money on apples for him or something stupid like that…heh it took a lot of will power not to just kill her out right but since I didn't have a death wish I managed to restrain myself...barely."

"It was on November 5th that you decided to test out your plan. I remember that you had gone missing and that we couldn't find where you had gone. After a while of looking for you in the usual places; kitchen, bedroom, some random room. I remember you liked to go into empty rooms and crouch in the middle of them in thought…but after about 3 hours of searching with the team and dealing with their complaints I volunteered to try to track you down by myself…I remember feeling very smug about your impending death, I remember thinking that you must have been hiding, that you felt that your end must have been near...I-I found you on the roof, it was raining really hard out."

"You-you just stood there…while the wind howled and tore at your clothes you just stood there in the heavy rain and just stared out into the sky. I called to you, and I know you must have heard me but you had decided to be cute and pretend that you couldn't hear me over the thunder, so I went out into the pouring rain myself. You…you started to talk to me, you said stuff that I didn't understand and to be truthful I only understand a bit of it now but you apologized to me…and asked me if there was a time in my life that I never lied…I remember feeling a sense of rage at you at that moment, then you asked me something that I still don't understand…you asked me if I could hear the bells…do you know what you might have meant by that L?"

Raito looked over at L who had been silent, he saw that L had his head down and was seemly studying his toes…but Raito saw the contemplating expression on his face and decided to stay silent until L either answered or just told him to continue.

Finally after about 5 minutes of silence L looked up with a grim face.

"I believe Raito-kun that you are correct in thinking that I did believe that my impending death was looming over me. It is my belief that the reason I asked about bells might have something to do about my childhood…you see when Watari had found me at a rundown orphanage the first place he took me to was a church, I had never been to such a place before, the thing I remember most from that time was hearing a very loud clanging noise, I later found out that they where the church bells ringing evening mass."

"It struck me that the bells where a sign of change for me, I had never told anyone about how I feel whenever I hear church bells…but when you said that you found me out in the pouring, freezing rain talking about those bells I must had felt a sense of some type of urgency…I must have wanted someone to know the significance of what those bells were to me. Heh, I bet I even made some comment about how they were for a some wedding or for a funeral."

Raito nodded solemnly.

"So Raito-kun…what happened after that?"

Raito swallowed harshly as he got closer…

"I managed to convince you to come back into the building; we where standing on the stairs toweling off…I sat down to finish drying my hair and you…you grabbed my foot and started to dry it off…"

Raito trailed off as he saw the expression on L's face, it was a mixture of weary amusement and misery. L waved his hand in a weary gesture for Raito to continue.

"…when I asked you what you thought you where doing you just said it was something you wanted to do for me…I remember water dripping from your hair. So without really realizing what I was doing I reached forward and started to dry your hair for you…I remember feeling a sense of smug victory over your supposed submission…you told me you wished that things could have been different. But that it didn't matter…everything would be decided soon…I now know that you knew that one of us was going to die that day."

"Now that I think about it…it was almost like you wished that it was you to die instead of me…but that's silly I know, you where L, catching Kira was all that mattered to you then."

Raito missed the indescribable expression cross L's face as he continued.

"Anyway you got a phone call from Watari and we decided to go back into the investigation room…you told everyone that a convicted felon who had been scheduled for the death sentence had already written in the deathnote about 29 days ago before and that in a few minutes we would have the proof that those false rules I had Ryuk put in were authentic or not."

"It went all according to my plans…Rem killed Watari and you before dying herself…heh its funny isn't it? That the only thing that can kill a god of death is a sense of love. When Rem killed you to save Misa…it was done with the intention to save her. I remember it all…the red warning lights as all the data on the Kira case got erased by Watari before his death, you falling out of your chair…I-I remember springing out of my chair to catch you. For some reason just the thought of you falling onto the floor in your final minutes didn't seem right. While you laid dying in my arms…I smirked at you. I gave you the evidence and peace of mind that you were right all along about me."

"I started to scream as you closed your eyes, and what I didn't realize until later was that it was a real scream. All my frustration that you had caused me I vented in that scream. Father and Matsuda had to pull me off of your…your corpse. Things after that just fell into place. Everyone was assured of my innocence and I took the name L for myself."

"We buried your body in an unmarked grave…with only a blank cross as a tomb marker…I only visited it once after you died…let's just say that it wasn't my best moment. Years past after that, I had a firm position as L and as Kira. I had almost 67% of the world already proclaiming Kira as a god. I even had shrines and religion sects in my name. The United States was the first country to fall under my control."

"It was about 5 years after your death that _they_ came into the picture…_Near and Mello._"

Raito couldn't help but sneer as he said their names.

"Or should I say…Nate Rivers and Mihael Keehl…oh and we can't forget dear Matt can we? Or should I say Mail Jeevas."

Raito watched as L gave him a look of surprise at hearing his heir's real names.

"Yes L I know those hellspawn you call heirs names. What I want to know is where the hell did those brats come from? They made my life a living hell! I sometimes wished you where alive just so you could have control them!"

Raito tried to lighten the mood some; he saw the concern shinning in L's eyes for his protégée.

"You should feel somewhat proud of them I guess…Mello and his little shadow Matt became major players in the Mafia, I believe that after your death Mello went a little mad. Heh, but even I have to admit he was somewhat brilliant, he managed to move my hand prematurely. He even got a hold of a Deathnote. He also…shot and killed my father and kidnapped and perpetually traumatized my sister."

Raito noticed the guilt in L's eyes as he told him that Mello had killed Yagami Soichiro and harmed his sister. Raito waved it away though; it wasn't L's fault that Mello had gone mad and did those terrible things, if you think about it Mello's crimes were a lot less worse then Raito's own where, Raito had destroyed a lot more lives then Mello ever did, and not just the people he had killed but also the lives of the families, he had effectively destroyed those as well.

"Near managed to create his own little group of FBI agents, I managed to killed a few of them but since I didn't know who most of them where I couldn't wipe them out myself. I managed to kill Mello with the help of Mikami…oh that's right; I haven't told you about him have I? Well Mikami was a Kira fanatic; he also became Kira temporarily because I couldn't use the deathnote with the way Near was breathing down my neck. Not to mention that the rest of the investigation team had started to get suspicious once again by Near's subtle and not so subtle hints about me. I remember thinking that he resembled you a bit…and I hated him for that fiercely, he was a poor substitute for the L I had fought with…it didn't seem fair at the time that I had to go against someone who I didn't think amounted much to the L name. I remember thinking at the time that only one person could have been the true L and battled with me on equal footing…and I had killed him years ago."

"The day finally came…Near wanted to meet me and the team in an abandon warehouse. I believed that I had won…Mikami was suppose to hide nearby and since he had the shinigami eyes he would have been able to see Near's real name and write it down in the deathnote I had given him…all of it would have gone perfectly if only Mikami would have followed my orders…but alas he didn't. He used the deathnote earlier and one of Near's little lackey men saw him, so Near switched the real notebook with a fake."

"Near had evidence that I was Kira…and I snapped after that I guess. I knew I was caught but…I started to laugh. I admitted to everyone there that I was Kira. Heh, you should have seen Matsuda's expression. I had almost convinced him earlier that Kira was really on the side of good, and that we had to be delusional and foolish to try to stop him…but the expression on his face when I confessed was full of fear and disbelief. I had thought I had convinced him in believing in me so I wasn't to worried about him…I had this piece of deathnote hidden in my watch, it was the same one I had used to killing Higuchi when I had to regain ownership of the deathnote years before, it still had his name on it with my blacken dried up blood."

"Anyway I tried to use that to write Near's real name on the piece of notebook but…Matsuda flipped out and shot at me. He shot my wrist so I would drop the piece of deathnote then because he got trigger happy in his hysterics he shot me in the shoulder and then at my chest…I was on the ground in a puddle of my own blood…screaming at him…I realize now he shot me out of a sense of self-preservation and fear. Which reminds me L…you are going to have to reinstate Matsuda."

"But Raito-kun…"

"No L no argument, I know it was an incident and so do you. He may deserved a bit of that beating that you gave him, but don't kick him off just yet, he may be an idiot but he's a well meaning idiot. Just…make sure he's not near any weapons or anything like that. But him having to doing stuff for the rest of the team as punishment would be a fine, you know my father and Watari will work him hard as retribution."

"…fine…"

"Thank you…anyway I didn't die from the gunshot wounds. But I was bleeding heavily and I had only written half of Nate Rivers name on the piece of paper. I cut my losses and tried to run for it…I somehow managed to escape the warehouse and I ran…and ran. I made it to some stairs in an abandon alleyway and I just collapsed. Ryuk…Ryuk had written my name in the Deathnote when he saw that I had lost. He told me in the beginning when we first meet that he would be the one to kill me when I stopped being entertaining, I remember not really believing him and thinking that I would never be caught...so I never really gave it that much thought until I laid there dying. I remember the pain of dying…heh; it's kind of ironic that Kira who had killed countless others with heart attacks died of a heart attack himself, it was kind of like poetic justice huh? "

"I remember fading away and…seeing you standing in front of me, you where transparent though. I was most likely just hallucinating you in my final moments…but it comforted me as I died."

"I went to Mu after that. It is this place of complete nothingness that the souls of those who used the deathnote are sentenced too. My soul was torn up into pieces and scattered across the abyss."

Raito trailed off a bit as he remembered his death. How the gunshot wounds that Matsuda had inflicted on him had burn and bleed. How the despair of his defeat at the hands of a child had gripped his heart and trampled his pride. The blackness had eaten his vision up until all that was left had been pain and darkness. By that time he had welcome death as it swiftly swept him away into its mysterious embrace.

"A lot of things happened on earth after my death, at least according to the Shinigami King, You see L, apparently only a few years after I died a large section of my followers went mad and believed that the total eradication of the human race would make me come back. I didn't-it wasn't what I wanted to happen. The King of the Shinigami was able to pierce my soul back up again but it was almost a millennium after the annihilation of earth and all of the gods who govern it…only two others had lived through the trouble I caused. If you want to call what happened to them living…"

"If you had been wondering about my appearance which I know you have been...I bet you already have it figured out by now but…I am a shinigami now L or at least a half breed. The King and the other god who survived recreated my body and help me purge almost all the deathnote's influence that had affected my soul. When my soul had been put back together and I was able to escape Mu I had awoken in a wasteland with a man in front of me. At first I thought it was you who had come to haunt me but…well I don't know whether to say that the Shinigami King resembles you or you resemble him. There was enough diversity between you too though that I was able to tell the difference almost immediately. He explained everything to me…how it was basically my fault that the world ended. I also was able to see my new body for the first time, heh real looker aren't I?"

"It seems that these crimson eyes of mine are a very common occurrence within the shinigami race, the red tint in a shinigami's eyes enables them to see humans names and life-forces, which the shinigami's use to extend their own lives."

Raito didn't hear L softly mumble a name "…Beyond…" so he continued without a pause.

"Anyway after a very interesting conversation with him we meet up with the other god, or should I say goddess who was the only other living being around. You should know her L…I mean you meet her in your dream…she's the Little Mother…one of the great creators of life and our own personal creator. Both you and I and most likely your brats were created by her personally. She was…gods L. She was like a child yet she could make you feel like the child. She's the one who gave me the lifenote and that's what makes me not quite a true pure shinigami. Shinigami are gods of death, but I'm not. My lifenote gives life; it uses my life-force which is virtually endless to add years to another life form. I've already used it on my family and Watari and…you."

Before L could interrupt him as he saw he was about to do Raito quickly continued; It would do no good if L interrupted him now. Raito didn't know if he would have the resolve to finish.

"I want to put an end to this L…I truly want the deathnotes either destroyed or taken off of this world. I now know that no human should be aloud to have such power. It creates such chaos and death…I was a foolish child who had an imperfect dream of a world that would never be. If anyone was justice it was you L, not me; and definitely not whoever is going to be the new Kira. We have to find the other deathnotes L and destroy them. Quickly before someone else gains a hold of them, ands since we have somewhat of a lead this time, several months in fact. Most likely Rem hasn't given up the deathnote I instructed her to give to the third Kira yet. Even if she does give away before we can gain a hold of it, I know who will be the third Kira…at least I hope I do. So much is changing from the original time-line…I can't help but feel at a lost."

"Anyway to continue my story the Shinigami King and the Little Mother gave up the rest of their life-forces to allow me to travel back into the past. To try to change things, I can not-will not allow the world to end as it did. I maybe half-shinigami, but I am human too…I am a part of this world just as much as the next human."

Raito felt very tired and worn down by his long winded speech and explanation, but he couldn't help but feel a sense of peace descend onto him as he became quite and waited for whatever kind of judgment L saw fit to bring to him. Personally the best case scenario Raito could think of was L calling him crazy but giving him the benefit of the doubt.

Raito looked over at L who was standing there with a contemplating expression on his face; Raito let him think over what he had heard and gave him a few minutes.

Raito looked away from L's intense figure and saw a mirror a few feet away from him facing away. It was to compelling not to get another peek at his new form. He moved over and started to look over his form critically. colorless bony skin covered his body along with his burning crimson eyes and blood red lips…his hair was now more reddish then his human body's and twice as long. He lifted the claws that seemed to substitute for hands and examined the sharp talon like fingers. He let them fall and then examined his outfit. God even his outfit described his state of mind. A tattered straight-jacket along with ragged white pants, stained and ripped, like…what happens to what was once an innocent soul when it became soiled and torn into something unimaginable…something…

"…monstrous…" Raito whispered.

---

"I don't think so Raito-kun."

"Wahhhh!"

Raito jumped as a voice spoke behind him right into his neck. He quickly turned around and glared at a smirking L.

"Don't do that!"

"You're so jumpy Raito-kun, is something the matter?"

"Yes something is, YOU!"

"Ouch Raito-kun you wound me…but putting that aside, why do you think that?"

Raito gave L a puzzled look.

"What do you mean? Think what?"

L gave Raito a look of fond aspiration and shook his head.

"I meant to what you where just thinking right now…why do you think your form is monstrous?"

Raito tensed up as his previous dark thoughts caught up with him again. He sent L an unimpressed cold look.

"Because I am L, I don't believe you need glasses, but if you can't see what I look like you might want to get Watari to buy you some or something. If you can see me the way I do…you would understand."

L shook his head and moved forward, close enough that his chest bumped into Raito's back. Raito froze as L moved his head to look over his shoulder to peer into the mirror along with him; his breath sent pleasant tingles along Raito's cheek.

Raito tried to contain his shiver but he had a feeling that L felt it because the smirk on his face widen into a leer.

"Shut up L…" Raito mumbled.

"Hmm ok Raito-kun I'm looking into the mirror just like you and I don't see anything monstrous or anything like that…what I do see though is a soul that has been stretched almost to its limit. A fallen beauty that has descended from the abyss and who had blessed me by loving me…what I see is Yagami Raito…the man I love who just happens to also be a immortal demigod."

Raito felt his eyes water but he refused to cry in front of L.

"Since when have you been so poetic?"

Raito watched as a smile widen L's face.

"Since I got bored reading history books and political memorials and decided to broaden my studies as a child."

Raito chuckled as he imagined a child like L reading poetry books.

"Yea laugh it up Raito-kun, I happen to know that saying poetic and sappy words to the one you love makes them get all mushy and lustful."

Raito raised his eyebrows at that and at how L wound his arms around his waist into a loose embrace. Raito knew that if he was in his human form he wouldn't have been able to support L's full weight that was pushing on him right now. But since he wasn't human at the moment, L could drape him in his full weight and Raito wouldn't even feel it.

"Oh? And how did you come to this idea? Do you have any other lovers I should know about?"

"No no no Raito-kun…I got it from watching the American program Lifetime."

"…o…k…"

"Raito-kun I have thought about all that you have told me and while I do need some more time to fully analyze all that you have told me I want you to know my feelings haven't changed. In fact I can tell you with full confidence that my love for you has grown. I'm glad that you no longer inspire to rule the world."

"…thank you L…"

Raito mumbled as his face flushed a bit at L's words.

'He really knows how to sweet talk someone despite him being such a recluse like person.'

"Anytime Raito-kun."

For a time they just stood there with L's arms around Raito's waist and Raito's hands overlapping L's.

Finally after a half an hour of just holding each other and thinking about all the things that had happened in such a short time Raito made a move to speak.

"L there's something else I've got to tell you…"

L's head went up from its resting spot on Raito's shoulder. He looked curiously at Raito's face and quirked his mouth a bit at how close their mouths where to each other.

"Yes Raito-kun?"

"It's about the lifenote…you know that I'm an immortal right? And that means that I won't die for a long, long time and that I will outlive everyone I know…well the Little Mother decided to help with that…so there's something that I need you to consider…"

"Yes what is it Raito-kun?"

"…L would you sta-"

**!!!RING!!!**

They both jumped in surprise.

"What was that?!" Raito cried out.

L let go of his hold on Raito and started to dig around in his oversized pants pockets.

"Don't worry Raito-kun, it was just my phone."

Raito shot L a look of disbelief.

"Why would your phone be on? I thought we were hiding?!"

"Yes Raito-kun, but this isn't my normal phone that Watari usually uses to contact me by, no this is my emergency phone. It is only to be used in a very important situation."

"Well answer it then I guess."

"That's what I was doing if Raito-kun would be so kind as to shut up."

Raito huffed a bit as L told him to shut up, but nether the less he made sure not to make any noise. Not because there might be a chance that whoever was on the other side of the phone would be able to hear him. No only someone who had touched the lifenote would be able to do that. But he didn't want to distract L, because if this was a serious emergency he didn't want to interrupt.

Raito only caught what L said on the phone, he didn't get a lot because all L seemed to be doing was listening to the other person speak and agree.

"…yes…yes…I understand…yes…ok…you know what to do…yes we'll be there soon…uh huh…ok bye."

Raito watched as L hung up the phone and fall into a contemplating state. The room descended into uncomfortable silence. The warm atmosphere that use to be there was totally gone. Finally Raito couldn't take it anymore.

"For the love of- L you think you can tell me what's happening? I'm kind of in the dark here and I'm not liking it one bit."

L turned to look at Raito as if just remembering that he was there.

"It seems Raito-kun that we have a bit of a problem…I know that you said that we would have a few months before a third Kira arose but it seems that the time-line that you came from is a lot more different then even you thought…because Kira has just stuck, he has just killed every criminal convict in the United States prisons. All of them, that's well over 25 thousand dead in one night. No survivors. He also was somehow able to send a message via web cam to the headquarters directly. I'm not sure if the headquarters are safe anymore. We will immediately be moving into a random hotel for now until we can secure a better place. Your father and the others have been advised to go home and stay low for now. No one has watched the tape yet but Watari will have it ready for us as soon as we get to the hotel…so if Raito-kun would please get back into his body we will be going."

Raito was stunned, so much so all he could do was stand there in silence as what L just said filtered into his brain.

'No…no way…'

"Raito-kun? Raito-kun…Raito!"

"Huh? Oh right…"

Raito quickly shook off his paralysis and moved over to his body on the bed. He closed his eyes and willed his spirit to go back into his human body.

When he opened them again he was relieved that the ceiling was the first thing he saw. Even though he was pretty sure he knew what to do, he had only ever done this once before.

Raito got up slowly as he quickly got use to being in his corporal body again.

"Ok L let's go…"

"Yes Raito-kun…um Raito-kun? What was it that you wanted to ask of me?"

Raito hesitated; he wanted so much to ask L to become immortal with him but…now was not the time…there were a lot more important things happening as Zaki had finally made him see for himself. So with great despondency he decided to put it off for a bit longer.

"Nothing important L, we can talk about it some other time."

"If you are sure Raito-kun…"

Raito nodded his head firmly.

"Yes I'm sure L."

Right before they left his room one thought crept into Raito's mind as he turned off his light and closed his door.

'…was this what Zaki was trying to warn me about…?'

---

Oh hell yea!! Finally! The Kira has arrived! My story will finally hopefully get on track now. Heh all the chapters so far have been mainly filler chapters…my plot will now unfold!! MUHAHAHA…sigh…

Anyway you are all going to hate me but…if any of you are dying to know what happens next you will have to wait till chapter 20. Because the next chapter will be the special chapter, we will be going back to when Matsuda shot Raito, in the POV's of…Three people!!

(Everyone falls to the ground as I totally lamely build up the suspense then deny all of you the names of those three people.)

Hehe I'm evil. I already know who it's going to be so you can guess but it won't change my mind if you ask me for someone I won't be doing…anyway sorry about the very late update but hey it's a big one!

Oh and you should all thank Mimi-chan she bribed me with energy drinks and doughnuts! Also she pulled a Lawliet in a real café! She did the whole L crouch and the strawberry cheesecake thing!

Oh and if any of you are reading my Detective Conan story 'The White Moon's Truth' I have a poll on my authors page on pairings!

PLEASE REVIEW! IT REALLY DOES HELP! I want to see if I can reach 350 reviews before the 20th chapter! Please help me make that happen!


	19. Chapter 19

Ok I know I promised people the special chapter for chapter 19, you know the one about the different point of views but I've been stuck on that for almost a month.

So…I'm just going to continue onward. I will be posting that special chapter however it will be its own one-shot, almost like a side-story or something like that. I will try to have it posted up soon though. But it will be under its own name and won't be a chapter in this story.

I would like to thank everyone who had waited patiently for this chapter, I'm sorry that it's going so slowly but real life and an MIA muse is taking up a lot of my time.

Thank you to…**Pink Feline, Black-Dranzer-1119, Lady Sayu, Interstella, Vanity, Blood-Fire-Dragon, Eiri and Kurama Lover07, Faerylark, Barranca, Reanna-Kris-Katelyn, Melodic Masterpiece, Other, Sayoko's fire, Pouf, Isamu-michi, Redfoxrose, Jesus-of-suburbia2o2o, littleone4u, Yoshiluvr, EE, Kyrre25, Nightwing Gurl, TUK224, Teenwitch18, Seethingkitsune, Gemenin001928, Dragongirl17, Lady Mayu, Ultimate Death Note L Fangirl, Shyn ShikyoKokoro, Dunfeellikelogin** (I'm sorry Dunfeellikelogin that you don't like my Raito-kun…)

I would also like to fix a mistake I made in the last chapter. I know I said that 50 million criminals died in America but let's change that shall we? It will instead be the equivalent of 25 thousand. (I'm to lazy right now to go back and change it) And if you don't think that one person can write that many names in one night well…who said it was just one person writing them down? (SPOILER!)

---

Stepping outside of his house right after L, Raito turned back around and made sure that the lock on the front door was secured. After what happened to his family only a few nights before he wasn't taking any chances especially when it involved his family.

Turning back around he saw L a few feet away down the path waiting patiently for him, he gave L a shaky smile which L returned, it helped to show that he understood what Raito was doing, but that understanding still didn't stop him from motioning with his hand for Raito to hurry up.

Raito walked the few feet to L and then almost as one they turned away from the house and walked towards the car that they had commandeered only a few hours ago for their escape.

As Raito got in the passenger side of the car a thought came to him.

"Hey L, will Watari be picking us up then? Or will we be taking the car to some random isolated location until Watari calls us up to give us directions."

L turned to look at him as he buckled up his seatbelt; it always amused Raito to see L sit straight like a normal person when he drove. Sometimes Raito half expected him to curl up in his preferred hunch while driving.

"Watari has already picked out a suitable hotel for us to locate to for now Raito-kun but we will be driving in the opposite direction for a while, hopefully confusing anyone who might just be following us. We will then proceed to ditch this car somewhere where no one will be able to find it for a while, then we will take the underground subway to the area of our destination."

"I guess that makes sense, if we're being followed or watched by this new Kira…"

Raito trailed off as the full implications of his statement filled the air. If the new Kira knew where L had been staying at he might just know who Raito was. Both L and Raito knew this and feared the consequences if such a thing were true.

A silence overtook them as L started to drive off into the night. Raito didn't mind it that much though he had too much to think about anyway then to try to make polite conversation.

'Right because L is the symbol of polite and pointless conversations, and I'm a platypus in the disguise of a god of death.'

Raito sneered to himself as his mind once more went off track.

'What the hell is wrong with me? I was never like this before, even before I touched the deathnote and screwed up my psyche. Why is everything so different his time around anyway? It almost like I've been sent to an alternate universe then my past. That would almost make sense if I believed in alternate worlds. Why is the third Kira striking now? In the original time-line I was still in confinement, and I know that what the third Kira did to all those American prisoners isn't something that happened either. The third Kira Kyosuke Higuchi was too stupid to do anything like that. He only killed criminals because Rem told him to, he mostly killed people to further his company and that didn't start happening for at least a month or so. So I doubt that the third Kira right now is Higuchi…but the way all those criminals died reminds me of someone…who though?'

"Raito-kun? We're here, wake up."

Raito gave a start as he heard L call out to him. He didn't even realize that he had been dozing with his eyes closed. He turned to look at L and realized that the car had stopped. Looking around them he realized that they were at a pier area near the base of a large water containment area.

"L don't tell me we've abandoning the car in a shipping yard."

"Of course not Raito-kun..."

Raito breathed out a sigh of relief, just as he was about to ask L why then they were at a shipping yard L continued talking.

"…we are going to push the car in the water of course."

'Oh you've got to be kidding me…'

"Come on Raito-kun."

Seeing that L was already out of the car Raito got out as well, making sure that he didn't leave anything important in the car Raito opened the glove box. Looking inside Raito paled slightly.

"Um L? Do you want the gun in the glove box or should we let it sink to?"

L who had been watching Raito walked around the car to the passenger side and without saying anything picked up the 9 mm browning pistol and the gun harness and strapped everything on under his shirt, just like he had done earlier when they had gone to Raito's home to confront the deathnote influenced burglar. If L noticed Raito's pale complexion he didn't say anything.

"Will Raito-kun please get behind the car and push it in the direction of the water? I'm going to take off the emergency brake and steer towards the edge."

"You're going to turn off the car right?"

"Yes Raito-kun, we don't want to make to much noise, I had to sneak the car inside here without headlights because the security guard here was awake at his post, luckily though he was watching a loud soccer game on his small telly."

Raito nodded and moved towards the back of the car.

10 minutes later of pushing and careful steering the only evidence that there had been a car there in the first place was a large ripple in the water that soon settled.

Raito looked around him for the first time; he didn't recognize the area and could only hope that L knew where they were and where the nearest subway station was.

"L where are we?"

"I'm not to sure myself Raito-kun; however I did see a subway station entrance about two blocks away from here. We should hurry to it before the train stops running for the night."

"Right"

The walk towards the station was filled with tension. Raito and L had almost been stopped twice before they finally got there. Once from someone who wanted to sell some dope to L thinking that he was a user by the black bags that hung under his eyes, L had walked right by the dealer without even a glance and then Raito had been catcalled from a group of women who wanted to sell themselves to him. Raito just kept his head down and walked closely to L not saying anything, he just kept walking.

Once they were inside the station and waiting for the train to come they sat on one of the benches that were scattered around the dirty station. The station was unsurprisingly empty. The only ones who occupied the area other then them was a passed out homeless person who was sleeping on the other side of the station from them.

They had about 20 minutes before the next train that would take them in the direction they needed to go would arrive. L had said that the train would drop them off about 5 blocks from where they would be staying for an undetermined amount of time until a safer location was located.

Raito couldn't help but let out a sigh of relief when he heard that, at least they didn't have to walk 10 miles or so once they got off the train. Raito was tired as it was; he didn't want to deal with the danger of being out in the open for a long period of time, especially with a new Kira on the loose.

"Raito-kun what's your thoughts about the new Kira?"

Raito turned his head to look at the tired looking detective next to him. He couldn't help but feel sympathy for L, if it wasn't one thing it was another for the poor man.

"Well…he's obsessed with justice; he has a twisted sense of morals and is more then likely a Kira fanatic."

"Yes that fits well with what I'm thinking of, do you think that the shinigami Rem was the one who gave this new Kira the deathnote?"

"It's possible, I remember that I did tell Rem to find someone who would use the deathnote in my name but still this is way too much. Rem isn't stupid, the only way I was able to destroy her in the first place was because of her emotional attachment to Misa. She has to know that this scale of killings would endanger Misa, so it could be that a different shinigami has dropped his deathnote."

"So we might just have 3 deathnotes floating around."

"More then likely"

"Crap I need a truck filled with sugar to even processes that."

Raito couldn't help but chuckled at the pout that L was sporting. Without thinking about it he leaned forward and kissed him.

L squeaked a bit at the unexpectedness of the kiss but soon took control. Raito moaned quietly as L forcefully dominated his mouth. Just as L roughly dragged his tongue across Raito's mouth asking to be let in…

"Hey looks like we're got ourselves a couple of fags don't it boys?"

Raito quickly tore his lips from L's and looked off to his right where the voice had come from.

'Shit we so don't need this right now…'

A gang of about 10 men were standing not 20 feet from them, and judging by their young age and what they were wearing and saying Raito could guess that they were the local hooligans that terrorized this area of the city.

One of the guys who had been leering at Raito started to walk over; leading the rest of them of the men over, Raito could tell that he was leader of the little faction.

He must of saw Raito glaring at him because he smirked and broke away from his friends and sat next to Raito on the bench. The thug threw his arm around Raito's shoulder pushing L away from him.

Raito sat ridged and looked straight ahead, turning himself off to what was happening around him, he kept a blank uninterested face as he felt the asshole's hands start to go under his shirt. He would have tried to throw the bastard off him and kick his ass…but the small knife that the guy had pressed to his stomach made him think twice about doing anything rash.

Raito frantically tried to think of something to make these bastards leave him and L alone but he couldn't think of anything that wasn't potentially suicidal.

'If it isn't one thing it's another…welcome to my fucked up life…'

While the guy started to mouth off about how a pretty whore like him shouldn't hang with fuck ups and the like, Raito peered over at L to see what he was doing; he had noticed that while the leader was messing around with him the rest of the group had pulled L away from him.

What he saw made him cringe.

L looked really, really furious.

He was standing up to his full height, the rest of the gang were circling him and making crude remarks about how their boss was going to fuck up his pretty little blow up doll.

L looked one step short of being homicidal.

Raito knew that usually L would be able to act logically and impassively but it seemed that the stress of the news about Kira had finally caused him to lose his cool.

Raito decided that he would have to take matters into his own hands before L did something that he would regret.

Besides it wasn't like he could die now was it?

Throwing himself onto the knife that was pressed on his abdomen maybe wasn't the best idea he could have come up with but it did the trick of shocking the man holding it enough for Raito to deck him into unconsciousness.

Even before the guy slumped onto the ground Raito was moving. Ignoring his bleeding wound he looked over at L just as the rest of the gang became aware of what was happening and tried to convert what he wanted to say by one word.

"Ryuzaki!"

…and just like that an all out battle started. Now that Raito was out of imminent danger L started to fight back. In the first 5 minutes of fighting he had already brought down 4 of the guys by his powerful kicks alone. Raito was also able to hold his own, mostly because he wasn't worried about any damage that could befall on him. After taking down 2 of his own it seemed that the rest of the gang that was left decided to call it quits because they ran off after seeing so many of their friends on the ground knocked out.

It could also have had something to do with the gun that L had pulled out to threaten them with.

Both Raito and L just stood there and watched as the rest of the rats ran off. They were both breathing hard and panting; L was hunched over in his usually standing position and didn't seem to want to stand straight again for some time, he quickly put the handgun back into the harness that was under his shirt, tucked away from the public eye.

After catching his breath and walking around making sure none of the hooligans where going to wake up any time soon Raito walked over to L to make sure he was ok.

Other then a few new bruises and scraps L seemed perfectly fine. Just as Raito was going to ask if he was ok though, L seemed to finally get his second wind back, he looked straight at Raito with an unreadable expression.

Before Raito knew what happened he was on the ground nursing his cheek and staring at the renewed panting L who had just slapped him.

"W-what the hell L?! What the fuck was that for?!"

L just gave him an unbelieving look.

"That Raito-kun was for scaring me out of my wits when you threw yourself on that knife. I know that you're immortal and everything but that doesn't mean you can do things like that without scaring me out of my mind. It may not kill you Raito-kun but you can still get hurt. You can still feel pain and agony, you may not remember so I'll refresh your memory. You may be half shinigami but you are also half human too. I told you that I care for you Raito-kun, so it would be logically that I'd care whether you got hurt or not. I'd advise you not to do stupid stuff like that again or next time I won't be as nice, I imagine that the humiliation of getting spanked like a three year old would advise you to be more cautious in the future."

Raito just sat there on the dirty ground holding his cheek and gaping at him. L just sighed and walked over and held out his hand. Raito didn't even hesitate to take it which made L smile at him. Returning the smile abide a shaky one Raito was helped up to his feet.

They just stood there for a few moments looking at each other. L's hand was still grasping Raito's in a tight grip, they didn't take their eyes off each other, it was like if they did the other would disappear into thin air.

'I wonder if I can ask him now…he was so distressed about me, maybe I can…'

But just as Raito opened his mouth he closed it again as he heard the subway train coming.

L turned to look behind him, breaking the moment that had settled around them. Raito dropped his hand from L's as the train rolled to a stop in front of them. Without saying anything they both picked their way around the bodies on the ground and got on the train. Because it was so late at night there wasn't that many people on the train so they didn't have to explain to anyone why they were covered in bits of blood and looked like they had been in a gang fight.

Which technically they had been only instead of ending up with their asses handed to them on a silver platter they had come out triumphed.

---

About 45 minutes pasted as they sat on the train waiting for their stop. Neither spoke to each other, Raito because he didn't know what to say and also because the slash to his stomach he had gotten from throwing himself onto the knife was hurting him a bit as it slowly healed itself, he estimated that by the time they got to the hotel that his wound would be closed enough that he wouldn't require any type of medical treatment.

L didn't speak because he was to busy thinking about the new Kira and what he was going to do about it…also because he was so tired he didn't know if he could talk at the moment, he wasn't usually this tired, he could go weeks without any real sleep, but that was only when he was focused on a case, he could ignore his physical need for sleep when he was working, but all the emotional trauma that he had endured in the last 24 hours was enough to make L think about fluffy pillows and Raito's warm naked body beside him…hmmm…

Raito looked up when the train started to slow down again, there was no one left on the train except him and L now, he looked over at L as he noticed him start to stand up.

'So this is our stop then'

Raito got up as well and followed L as the train rolled to a stop. Stepping out of the train they both walked out of the underground subway station into the clear cold air outside.

"So Ryuzaki which way do we now?"

Raito made sure to call L Ryuzaki in public; even if no one was around he knew he needed to make sure not to call L by his detective name out loud.

He saw L smile at him when he called him by his alias name, it seemed that L appreciated that Raito remembered to be cautious in the open.

"We go left now Raito-kun, I know now which way we have to head to so as long as we move quickly we should be alright."

Raito nodded and then started to walk down the street on his left.

10 minutes later they found themselves staring at a small but clean looking building, it was squeezed in between two different types of stores. One was an antique bookstore that was of course closed at this time of night and on the other side of the hotel was a small 24 hour mini mart. There was a signed above the archway to the entrance of the building that they were about to enter.

It read the _Mizuki Inn_.

'Huh nice name, the beautiful moon…kind of reminds me of L in a way, like how he glows a bit when he's on his laptop at night, I think the reason for that might just be because of his pale complexion.'

They walked up the small stone steps to the old fashion looking doors and opened them. Stepping inside Raito looked over the place as L walked up to the sleepy looking owner behind the counter, it was an elder woman, Raito guessed she was around Watari's age, guessing by the way she didn't seem to be surprised to see them it would seem that they had been expected, more then likely Watari had made the owner stay awake to greet them and show them their room.

As Raito looked around it was obviously to him that this place wasn't a chain owned hotel but rather a locally owned place. It looked like someone converted a small building of apartments into a hotel, either that or a 3 story brick house.

'Its interesting that Watari choose this place, it makes it both easier and harder for the current Kira to find us. If we had gone to a more public hotel there would have been more of a chance of being seen, but on the other hand we would have blended in the background. In a small hotel like this it is out of the way and secluded but because there aren't as many rooms as a larger scale hotel there are going to be less guests around so once again we will stick out. I suppose though that Watari knows what he's doing, I'm not to sure how L though is taking this, it doesn't look like this place has a lot of room, I doubt that L will be able to rent out an entire floor to satisfy his paranoia.'

Raito snorted to himself in amusement and walked over to where L was talking to the owner.

He stood a few feet behind him and listened as L gave the woman some pseudonym names for both himself and Raito.

His good humor though took a nose dive as he heard L's fake story for the both of them.

"Hello my name is Minoru Kiyoshi, my grandfather Yori Takeshi booked the entire upper floor a few hours ago, I apologize if there is any inconvenience but you see I have a valid reason for that…my husband here-"

Raito was startled as L suddenly spun around and grabbed his arm pulling him to stand beside him, it was so sudden that Raito stumble a little as he tried to regain his balance after being mishandled like that.

"- you see my husband Hikaru Akira here has Agoraphobia."

As the woman behind the desk just looked at L with a blank uncomprehending stare L explained what he meant in a voice that was clearly patronizing, but the elder woman didn't seem to hear it, she was blushing now as she finally comprehended what L said about them being married.

Raito after hearing what kind of cover story L was going for immediately made himself look scared and uncertain, cuddling up into L's embrace, as the arm that had dragged him to the counter wrapped itself around his shoulders. He wished L had told him what he was going to do before, but he had the sneaking suspicion that L was making it up as he went along.

Raito listen as L told the woman what Agoraphobia meant and why they needed a whole floor for themselves.

"You see…Hanako-san was it? Agoraphobia is a very serious condition, my beloved here hates being outside our home, the poor dear can't even step outside the house without having a panic attack. But you see, our house burn down just last night…yes it was tragic, I'm just grateful no one was hurt. My poor Hikaru here had to be dosed with a mild sedative so he wouldn't panic when we had to look around for somewhere we can stay temporary."

The old woman fell for it hook, line and sinker. Her pitying and sympathetic gaze almost made Raito squirm but he managed to stay still by pushing his face into L's chest to give her a better show of being a meek, scared, phobic young man.

'Oh L you are so going to pay for this…'

Finally the woman snapped out of her stupor and started to herd the both of them up a flight of stairs.

"Oh you poor dears, don't you worry about it. Aunty Hoshi understands, your grandfather already paid so there isn't anything to worry about. I don't get many guests anyway so feel free to take up the third floor; there are a total of 4 rooms up there. 2 are just bedrooms, one's a commons bathroom, and the last is a suit with a bedroom and bathroom, the suit also has a small kitchen area."

L just kept nodding his head as the woman drone on and on about her hotel and the neighborhood. It seemed that the woman was now totally awake and perky.

Something that made Raito almost feel a acute dislike at her for but was to tired to really feel.

As they finally got to the third floor landing L finally interrupted her as she started talking about her grandchildren.

"Thank you Hanako-san for all of your help, I'm sorry if we inconvenienced you at this time. We will of course respect any rules you have and because of my husband's condition we will of course be keeping to ourselves. You will be paid quite handsomely every week for your discretion. You see…my grandfather and I am not to sure if our house fire was an accident or not so I would of course appreciate it very much if you'd keep our location and stay here a secret."

Hanako nodded her head to show she understood. Her pitying gaze never left her face as she spoke.

"Of course sweetie, your grandfather has already informed me about it…something about a jealous ex-boyfriend? Or was it girlfriend? Oh my old age just doesn't agree with my mind these days."

After biding the woman a polite goodbye L dragged the still acting Raito to the door at the end of the corridor.

As soon as the door was closed behind them Raito wrenched himself from L's side. He may have been comfortable there but he was slightly mad at L for making him seem like the village idiot.

"Next time some kind of warning would be appreciated Ryuzaki!"

"I apologize Raito-kun, but I wasn't quite sure what kind of cover story that Watari had set up for us or even if he did set up one, so I improvised. Besides we need privacy and this way you won't have to leave the hotel so there won't be a chance that you'd be recognized if Kira somehow tracks us down. Also by claiming that we're married to each other no one would question our relationship. We don't look alike so the family gimmick was out."

Raito nodded tiredly to show that he understood, and he did really, he just didn't like that he was going to be labeled as an invalid.

"Ok fine I get it…so now what?"

L looked over at the clock that was placed on the wall. It showed that it was 4 in the morning.

"Now Raito-kun we are going to bed and getting some sleep, Watari is more then likely out gathering the equipment that we will need to continue our investigation. We will commandeer this suit while Watari will have one of the bedrooms on this floor, the other bedroom will be converted into a room for us to work in."

"Can we even do that? I mean we may be renting this space but I don't think we will be aloud to change and rearrange things like that."

"Its fine, that woman's husband who is the actual owner of this hotel is an old veteran friend of Watari's, he is trust worthy and knows the truth, the story I made up is for his wife's benefit and anyone else, she doesn't know anything about me or who her husband really is. He is also involved in our organization."

"Huh?"

L sighed as he sat on the bed that was in the far corner of the room; Raito walked over from the door and sat beside him, giving L a confused questioning look.

L had a look of deep consideration on his face, it was if he was deciding whether or not to say anything more. After a minute though of deep consideration he nodded to himself and turned to Raito.

"You see Raito-kun…I may be L and the three greatest detectives in the world but…I am only a recent part of an association. There has been a group of people before me who have been involved in bettering the world for years now. Watari is one of the descendents of the founders of this group; I believe it was founded almost eight hundred years ago. It is just by chance that my real name is L when it is also my code name. There are other people out there with letter code names. Scientists, politicians, generals, professors, teachers, archeologists, senators, kings, presidents, we are all over the world. Most of us were chosen at a young age and were groomed for success in our chosen fields. Others are found later on in life either by excelling in their fields or by some other means."

Raito was listening in silence as L confessed all of this. He was slightly shocked by all that L was telling him…but it all made sense in a way.

"Which were you?"

"I was one of the ones they were able to find at an early age. Watari was the one to find me when I was a child, he's the one who groomed me into a detective really. I had no patience for any of the other occupations that were available to me."

Raito nodded as his mind processed all of the new information that was given to him.

"I'm guessing that Hanako-san's husband is also a letter member?"

"Yes he is M, he is one of last 3 older members that we have left…we usually don't have a long life expediency. When we die new members are given our letters. I'm not to sure how many L's there have been before me. But I do know that I'm one of the very few to ever use my code name is association with my job."

"Now Raito-kun I know that you may have a lot of questions but that will have to wait till later, we need to get some rest because in the morning or more acutely later today we will be tracking this new Kira down…I also have an idea I want to run by you but that can wait till later, we will also be watching that tape that the new Kira has sent us, after watching that we can decided our next course of action."

Raito could have sighed in relief, he was feeling very fatigued by all that had happened. Taking off his shirt he inspected the knife wound, he was happy to see that it was already healed up.

Stripping out of the rest of there clothes and throwing them on the ground they both curled under the blankets on the bed Raito curled up into L's arms, gradually the both fell into slumber as the weight of the day took it's toll on them.

---

Holy shit what have I done now?! I didn't mean for L to have his own organization…or be a part of one. I just watched the new spin-off movie 'L Change the World' which is GREAT!! They had a woman named K in it along with I believe a guy named J…also it kind of showed that there were more letter people out there so…the idea was just so cool I had to use it.

Oh for all those L fans out there you must watch that movie! You either love it to death or hate it! I personally loved it, and cried when the credits rolled showing that it was over…I want more damn it! The letter organization doesn't play that big of a part in this story but the sequel on the other hand…

Oh I also have a new poll up! It's a poll on who's going to die in this story! I have a pretty good idea who is going to die but you can still vote on it! Everyone is on there (I think) so please go to my profile and take the poll!

PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE REVIEW! I NEED THOSE REVIEWS LIKE FISH NEED WATER, LIKE MONKEYS NEED BANNANS, LIKE L NEEDS SUGAR AND LIKE RAITO NEEDS TO KILL! **PLEASE REVIEW!**


	20. Chapter 20

I hate _hate_ this freaking story so much now!!! You have no idea how many times I've almost abandoned this piece of…insert bad swear word.

It's not the plot or anything; I'm still in love with that. It's just as I've been rereading it I see so many mistakes and confusing scenes. And the occness…oh my almighty Kira kill me now!! I'm honestly shocked that so many of you enjoy actually enjoy this. At least that's my impression after almost 400 amazing reviews…but I did notice that more then a few of you have told me to or offered yourselves to beta this. I agree that my grammar sucks butt and I don't even have excuse that English isn't me first language because it is…so I'm just a very sucky person when it comes to grammar and all that it seems.

I've really consider getting myself a beta, I know my works would be wondrously cleaned up. The only thing that's stopping me is I don't want to make someone else wait up for me to write up a chapter. It makes me feel like I'm on a dead line and I'd stress myself out even more…and the other reason is that I've no idea how to do the beta thing…do I just get the person's e-mail address and then send my chapters to them and get them sent back? I don't know really so if there is anyone out there who could explain it to me please do so…I'm lost.

Ok I'm very sorry for the long A/N…so let me just take a moment more of your time to thank and bow down to everyone who has reviewed and read my story. Serious it's because of you guys that this story is still going…as slow as it is. If not for you this story would wound up like my others…dead in the water.

This is dedicated to my best friend in the world…you know who you are!...HUG THE BIRD!!! (inside joke) XD

---

An alarm clock going off was the first thing that Raito became aware of as he slowly woke up. The second thing that Raito became aware of was the arms that were wrapped around him and the warmth that radiated behind him.

A soft snoring sounded into his ear as L continued to sleep through the loud and annoying sound of the alarm going off.

'He must be really tired if he could sleep through that…I wonder what time it is anyway? The alarm clock is on the other side of the bed on L's side so I can't look unless I want to wake up L. Hmm…now that I think about it I wonder who it was that set the alarm last night? I don't believe L did, more then likely it was Watari. I hope it isn't too late. We're on a deadline as it is with this new Kira's actions…damn now I've got to get up.'

As carefully as possible Raito managed to slide out of L's arms without waking him, an admirable feat to be sure, especially considering how tight L's arms had been wrapped around him to begin with.

Walking out of the bedroom Raito moved over to the round table that was situation in the main room of the suite, on one of the chairs next to it was a clean pair of clothes that Raito instantly could tell was for him. The chair next to his obviously held L's clean clothes, the glaring white shirt and pants was L's signature outfit after all.

Taking the clothing he moved over to the small bathroom that was also in their suite. He could only sigh in relief that he didn't have to leave the suite to go to the shared bathroom on their floor, he may not be able to die but he was pretty sure he would keen over from embarrassment if he accidently walked in with it already occupied and since the only other person who could occupy it could be Watari…well enough said.

After taking a satisfying hot shower he walked out with a towel over his head in clean clothes. He was contemplating about going to go wake up L, but as soon as he opened the door he wasn't really surprised to see L already up and on his laptop typing away. After Raito opened the door L looked up, it was obvious that he had been waiting until Raito got out of the bathroom so he could take his own shower.

Raito smiled at the still sleepy looking man.

"Hey how long have you been up?"

"I woke up the moment Raito-kun left my arms…I was just e-mailing Watari about the progress of our office being fixed up and getting everything ready, it seems he's been very busy and the rooms already been done. I'm afraid today and every day after will be very busy Raito-kun at least until we capture this new Kira."

"I understand L, don't worry I want to capture this bastard just as much as you do. But I confess to being surprised, if you were awake why didn't you come in the shower with me? I wouldn't have minded…"

Raito smirked as L turned a light shade of red at Raito's knowing smirk.

"I confess Raito-kun the thought had crossed my mind but I know that if I did go in there…we'd be in there for a while. And while I know that that time would have been spent with great enjoyment we can't afforded to waste any time."

"Oh, ok that makes sense then. So how about you go take a shower and I'll see about us getting some breakfast?"

"Sounds good to me."

L quickly typed up something, more likely telling Watari that he was signing off, when he was done he jumped up and scooped up his clothing and walked towards the bathroom door. But before he could pass him Raito reached out and stopped him.

L had a confused expression on his face as Raito turned him around to face him.

"Raito-kun…?"

Raito stopped him from saying anything else by covering his mouth with his own. It wasn't a sensual kiss, but a soft kiss of comfort and love. L was only startled for a second before he quickly kissed back. They just stood there for a moment, taking comfort in each others touch. Raito pulled back a bit after a while to look at L. Seeing the dazed eyes his grin widened before he bent once more to place a quick almost pecking kiss on L's swollen lips before he regretfully back away more fully.

It only took a moment for L's dazed eyes to clear up; he sent a look of fondness and exasperation at Raito before he continued his walk into the bathroom. Raito laughed a bit as he noticed the slight crab walk that L had to use to get the rest of the way to the bathroom. Not that he was much better at the moment but a few thoughts of his old grade school teachers in bikinis took care of the problem in only a few seconds.

Looking into a mirror that hung on the wall Raito made sure that he was presentable enough to leave the room. He'd see if Watari was around first, if not then he'd have to put his acting skills to the test and try to get the owner to pity him enough to quickly get him some food so he wouldn't have to be downstairs for a long period of time. He had to admit that L's quick story of him being agoraphobic was both a blessing and a curse. With it he wouldn't be question if he didn't leave their floor a lot, on the other hand it was harder for that same reason. He couldn't go down to talk or ask the owner lady for anything without having to act scared and meek. Something he really hated with a passion, he wasn't any of those things and he hated to act like that for anyone, even for a stranger.

As he walked down the hall he saw that his acting skills wouldn't have to be put to the test. Watari was just walking up the stairs with a tray full of food, Raito quickly walked over to relive the heavy burden from the elder man before the man could even open his mouth to ask for help.

"Ah thank you Yagami-san, I have to confess that while the spirit is as vigilant as ever the body I'm afraid is getting on in years."

"It's no problem Watari…by the way you don't have to be so formal with me you know, you can call me by my first name as well."

Watari smiled as he gave a small nod.

"Then Raito-san it is."

Raito let out a fond huff as he and Watari walked back to the suite where L was waiting for them.

"By the way Watari, how is the rest of the investigation and my family?"

"Ah about that, after we got the news of the new Kira I sent the rest of the team back to their families, I've also deleted any evidence that they were ever involvement with the Kira case from all the data bases, just in case. I made sure to have them swear an oath not to say anything about the investigation or about you, I also may have threatened them subtly but not a lot I assure you. Also I know that L might not approve of this but I made sure that Matsuda was taken to a hospital so he could get treatment for the bruises and broken bones that L had inflicted. I know what he did was very stupid and I know that I should resent him but…he's just…"

Raito nodded his head.

"I know he's like a little puppy sometimes, he may do stupid stuff and be a generally nuisance but you can't stay mad at him for long. Don't worry Watari I already talked about it with L, before we got the news I had convince him to let Matsuda back on the force with limited access to everything."

Watari seemed relived.

"Oh that's good then. You know for the entire time I've known him I've never seen him lose his composure like that, ever. He's never really expressed himself that much as a child or even later in life, I'm afraid that's mostly my fault."

Raito looked surprised for a second but then a thoughtful expressed overtook his face as he really thought about it.

"Really? I guess that makes sense, it also explains why he's been more emotional around me lately. I'm guessing that all the suppressed emotions that he'd been holding inside him are all bursting out almost at once and it's confusing him enough to become more emotional lately."

"Yes that makes sense I guess…look Raito-san, I can tell how much you mean to each other. I've seen it in the past few days and while the circumstances aren't the most idealistic I'm glad that the two of you were able to met. I didn't want to admit it but I've known that L was slowly dying inside for many years now, while he is very good at his job that's all he's been living for and it's begun to take it's toll on him."

Raito looked at the honest expression in Watari's face and smiled.

"Thank you Watari I understand and I can't begin to tell you how much your support of us means to me…well we'd better get back quickly before we deprive L of his sugar for much longer."

Watari chuckled and nodded, they'd been standing outside the closed door talking so Watari just reached out and opened the door letting Raito go ahead of him so he could set down the tray of food first.

L looked up from his laptop as they walked in, his damp hair hung limp on his head and into his face. Seeing the food his face lit up and he quickly closed his laptop.

As Raito set down the tray down Watari quickly started to set things out. It seemed that it was a pancake breakfast for both of them. For Raito a healthy breakfast of three pancakes with no butter and a minimum amount of syrup along with slices of banana on top. Some whole wheat toast with a little butter on them completed the meal along with a glass of orange juice.

L on the other hand had a slightly different pancake breakfast…five chocolate pancakes drowned in butter along with strawberry syrup and slices of strawberries on top as well as powdered sugar, there was also a pile of whip cream on top of that and chocolate chips decorating it. No toast but he did have some multiple vitamins he had to take as well. His choice of drink was of course chocolate milk.

"Wow L…I can just see the diabetic shock just by looking at that."

L just sent him an unimpressed look.

"I need as much energy as possible today Raito-kun. You know why of course. Today we are going to analyze that tape that the third Kira sent us, and then we're going to try to track him down by that. This is the only evidence and clue that we have of this new Kira."

"Sorry L I know that."

They quickly finished their meals in silence after that. Raito could tell that the thought of the tape was enough to irritate the detective so Raito decided to just stay quite until necessary.

Raito hadn't even notice that Watari had left until he returned precisely the moment they were both done.

"If you would Sirs…I've already finished remodeling the other room for you. The tape is already ready to watch."

"Ah yes Watari thank you…if you would Raito-kun?"

"Yes."

With that they both left Watari in the room and moved to the room across from theirs. Raito didn't show it but he was more then slightly apprehensive and scared to see what could be on the tape. He could only hope that the tape would give him some clue in figuring out who this third Kira was…maybe it was someone he knew or would know? He suddenly wished that in his past future he had kept better track of his fans and associates.

'Oh well no use crying over spilled milk, the only thing to do now is to watch this tape and see what comes next.'

---

As soon as they walked into the newly remodeled room Raito had been shocked, the bed and table and the usual furniture that you'd see in a hotel room had been removed.

In its place was something reminiscing of L's old haunt. A long desk had been put placing it against one of the wall. Computers lined up on top of them. Comfortable chairs had been placed for both of them. L swiftly sat down in one and turned on the monitor in front of him, Raito following at a more sedated pace.

T.V screens had been placed around the room in different locations. It was obvious to tell that each of them was meant to sport different scenes. There was one bigger screen in front of them and that was the one that L turned on to watch the tape with.

A thought occurred to Raito just before L turned on the screen.

"Hey L I was just thinking what about the people downstairs? Won't they be able to hear this as well?"

"Ah you bring up a good point Raito-kun…fortunately for us only the first floor is mostly occupied. The second floor only had one person renting a room and that room is on the other side of the hotel. So we're in the clear. I've already informed Watari that I want this room and our suite to be sound proof by the end of the week."

Raito sent L a confused look.

"Ok I get that this room needs to be sound proof but why does our room have to be as well?"

L didn't answer him but his sudden leer told Raito everything.

"…oh…okay then."

Raito coughed into his sleeve as he turned his red face back to the screen.

L smiled a bit as he started to speed type on his computer and turned on the huge screen to watch the tape that sent both of their teeth on edge.

The screen suddenly turned from pitch black to gray static then the background suddenly became the color of drying blood.

A sudden screeching noise sounded out loud causing both of them to flinch, thankfully L reached over and turned down the volume, causing Raito to let out a sigh of relief, sadly the relief didn't last long.

'Well if this new Kira wanted to go for over dramatic he or she certainty accomplished that.'

A sudden voice overtook the screeching noise causing both Raito and L to sit up straight and pay attention. As the voice sounded words also popped up on the screen, like subtitles. Raito felt great annoyance that the new Kira thought they were stupid enough to need his words spelled out for them…he could tell that L also had come to the same conclusion and was also greatly annoyed by it as well.

~ Greetings my misguided foes…I bet you are most confused over how we got your location and the deaths of those worthless pests…heheh I can just picture your horrified expressions when we killed those filth. But enough of pleasantries…L I know that you have Kira. The thought of you having Our lord and savior makes us sick, but fortunately we have the means to save him and destroy evil people like you…this evil rotten world will be cleansed in the name of our god! We found you once and we will do so again! You can not hide from us l! we the righteous shall purge your filthy black soul from this world and purify it for our god! Those criminals in America were only the first to feel out wrath of justice! We are the just in this world and all that oppose us are the evil of this world and will be justly put down like the vermin they are!! We will soon reunite with our god and with him by our side we will delete this world from it's black existence! L have fun watching the news because our divine mission has only begun Muhahahahaahahahhahaahaha…~

The video cut off soon after that. The evil and mad laughter hung in Raito's ears as he stared blankly at the now dark screen. He knew, oh yes he knew who was behind this now, and it wasn't just him. There were way too many clues in that message that gave everything away. He had hoped…but he knew that everything that had happened last time was happening again…only at a much faster pace then he could have imagined.

"Does Raito-kun have any thoughts to who is behind this? From what I've heard it sounds like this new Kira isn't just one person but many…"

"Yes you are right L that's exactly what it sounds like…I also have a very good idea on the identity of the person who was in the message right now."

L shot him an impressed look as he started to type rapidly on the computer. No doubt already trying to track down where the message had come from.

"Do you really Raito-kun? That's impressive…I'm guessing that it is someone you knew in your past life?"

"Yes…I guess you can say that…"

L turned away fully from his computer to give Raito him undivided attention.

"So Raito-kun? Who is this person that you believe was on the tape?"

Raito closed his eyes and nodded softly was if to himself.

"I believe I told you about how I in the future needed to give up my position of Kira to someone else to avid Near?"

"Oh yes I remember him…his name was…"

"Yes Mikami Teru."

"How can you tell?"

"There was way too much of him in that message. His personality is very distinct and I'd recognize it anywhere. I didn't know that he was a Kira fanatic at this point in time but I have a theory that this time-line is much different then mine was, or at least that it's changing significantly since I've returned."

L nodded his head in understanding and a thoughtful look overtook his eyes.

"I wonder though Raito-kun who else was with him? He had already insinuated many times that there was more then one person playing at Kira."

Raito thought about it hard as he continued to stare at the black screen. He let the total darkness of it overtake him mind as he drifted off in his own mind.

Suddenly the answer popped in his head. He wanted to hit himself for not thinking about it sooner. He also wanted to crawl inside a hole and howl out his angst.

He looked over at L with a grim expression on his face. L had turned back to his computer so he didn't see it but after a few seconds he must have felt it because he turned his head back around to look at him. Raito could tell that L was surprised by the look on his face because of the concern that was shinning for him in L's own eyes.

"What is it Raito-kun?"

"I think…no I know what Mikami meant by the 'we'…I don't remember if I told you this or not but…in the future I had a lot of worshipers and fanatics right? Well after my own death a bunch of them went crazy, a few years after that they…well to put it in simplest terms destroyed the world…I believe a much smaller and earlier fraction of that cult has sided with Mikami and is using the DeathNote."

"….well that isn't good."

"No Lawliet it isn't."

---

Ok I'm going to end it here because this seemed like a great place to end it. I don't really remembered if Raito had told L about the future end of the world or not and I don't feel like rereading over my own story so let's just say that if I did it's a recap K?

Hmm…do you know what? I think I'm going to try to speed events up a bit. I mean earlier I had thought about all these little but not very important scenes I was going to add but damn it I just want to get to the point now! So expect the plot to speed up a bit after this!

Do you know what? I'm going to DisneyLand! I know that might not sound really awesome to most of you out there but I haven't had a family vacation in a long, long time. So I'm really happy about it. In fact I'm going in a few hours! Sad thing is I have a 10 to 12 hour drive to get there. Boo! But upside is that I'm going to be there for 5 freaking days! And we've got hopper passes and fast passes too!! OMK! So in celebrate of that I give you a new chapter! Love me and whoreship me! heeheh

…no more energy drinks at 11 o'clock at night…it does funny things to my brain…

Oh also guess what? I'm going to cosplay as L in Disneyland! Complete with Goofy ears! I know your not suppose to cosplay there but since L's clothes are so…dare I say it normal they can't do anything about it! hahaahah

Once again thank you all who have read and supported my story! I'm sooo sorry for the long hiatus that I've forced onto you…me sorry.

Anyway Please review!! I can't believe I've already got about 400 reviews! I never expected such a response I love you all! Hugs and L pluishes for everyone!

Review! Review! Review! Review! REVIEW!!!


	21. Chapter 21

Oh looky here a new chapter so soon! Wow be shocked and amazed…I know I am.

Well I had fun at Disney, but I have to say after spending 5 days there…you kind of get bored of it a bit, maybe it has something to do with my age…don't know. But it was ok, I went on Splash Mountain like 5 times, and had to go back to our hotel to change after each time because I was soaking wet. Oh and Tower of Terror? Awesome!!!

Sadly though I got sick on our last day there and was miserable on the ride back home…11 freaking hours in a cramp car is hell when you're sick! Then it lasted for a freaking week and a half! I had to go to the doctors to get meds!! Argh! Then my phone stopped working properly so let's just say…don't mess with me at the moment I breath dragon fire.

…sorry. My dog just went all over the floor and I'm cleaning it up…not fun! X'(

Anyway sorry about the rant…I would like to thank everyone who has read and reviewed and favorite and alerted my story! You are my life blood!

Oh and about the beta issue I'm contemplating it very much…still it scares me a bit to even think about doing it for some unknown reason. But I am considering it with all seriousness.

Well onward then troops!

---

"L what are you doing?"

Raito watched as L slipped his cell phone from his jean pocket and started to dial. When L heard Raito speak he looked up and quickly explained.

"Well in light of what we've learned Raito-kun I'm going to make a few calls to some people who I believe could help us."

"Oh well that's good I suppose but who are these people and can they be trusted?"

L chucked a bit at Raito's pensive expression, Raito huffed a bit as he felt that he was being laughed at. Which pissed him off, why the hell would L laugh at him? He thought that his question was entirely reasonable and understandable under the circumstances. He let his anger at L show on his face. Hopefully L would get the hint and explain himself quickly.

Luckily for L he was a smart man and could see the hint for what it was.

"Sorry Raito-kun but the thought of those people betraying me was mildly amusing. One of them is a good friend of mine who knows a thing or two about cults, the others are well…unique I believe is the best way to put it. They will not joining us though, one is too old for this kind of work and the others are way too young."

Raito thought about it for a minute…wait could L mean…?

"L do you mean to call Wammy House?"

L's face glowed with pride at Raito's guess.

"Yes I do Raito-kun. You see Roger knows quite a bit about cults, he use to study them when he was younger. He worked as a kind of profiler of sorts at the time. Also I know that their still young and all but I think that we can benefit of asking my heirs for their options on the matter. Also Matt's certain skill at computers and the like would help us a lot in tracking down these new Kiras."

"Well I guess so…I mean I only knew them when they were older so I don't know much about what they are like right now as kids. I guess as long as they stay safely at Wammy's House and everything it should be alright. I doubt that these new Kiras know anything about Wammy's so it should be safe."

"My thoughts exactly Raito-kun."

As L turned back to his phone Raito looked back at his computer screen. Staring at the white screen in front of him he thought about his past, of what it had been like as Kira and the years he spent after L's death…truthfully it had boring and lonely.

When he had acquired Mikami's services he had foolishly thought that he'd found someone once again that could be his equal…but no. While Mikami was smart and all he was a lunatic and a crazed fanatic. So much so that even then Raito had known that he would have to kill him sooner rather then later, before he became a threat to Kira's rule. Mikami had become a liability almost as soon as he became the fake Kira, too much of a wild card for Raito's carefully laid out plans. Misa was also in that group but as long as she held the eyes he had been willing to let it go for a while yet, he would have also killed her when she outlasted her usefulness.

He closed his eyes as he replayed his last few minutes on earth alive, the way that Near had masterfully cornered and unmasked him…he could now see how brilliant it was and he could also feel a certain respect for him, he had been so much like L it had been more then slightly uncanny.

But that's not what he wanted to think about right now…he tried to remember Mikami, about how he had acted when he had learned that his supposed god was just a young man, abide a very smart young man but still a mortal like himself.

Raito remembered that he hadn't taken it too well.

'Hmmm…I wonder how this younger Mikami ended up in a cult filled with Kira lovers? From what I can remember he hadn't really become a Kira fanatic till about two years after L's death…was I wrong? Could he have been a Kira fan even at this time? He wouldn't even be working at his firm yet, he's more then likely still at collage right now studying to become a lawyer. Maybe that's it…this cult…he could have found out about it at his collage…yes…'

Raito opened his eyes and narrowed them in thought…he could vaguely remember something of that nature from his time as Kira in the future-past. Unfortunately he hadn't paid that much attention to it at the time, it had only been a vague rumor at the time and he had much more pressing matters to attend to them some collage group of Kira worshipers. He had even remembered feeling pleased at the time about it. Right now he felt like throwing up.

Right then, first thing first…find out where Mikami was going to collage at. Raito quickly started to hack files on the computer in front of him. He could hear L talking on the phone beside him but he ignored it for the most part, he had to concentrate on what he was doing so he didn't miss anything important.

'Ah here we go…let's see here…Hideyoshi law school. Hmm…it seems to be a trade school of some kind, I don't remember ever hearing about this place…it doesn't seem to have much publicity either. Only about three hundred students?! Is this some type of community collage or something? That's so small. Where the hell is it located at? Hm…what?! Only about two miles away! What the hell?! That can't be some sort of messed up coincidence.'

Something seemed off and Raito swore to himself to get to the bottom of it…but first…

Raito turned his head and listened in on L's side of the conversation he was having on his phone, Raito can only guess that the other side of the line was on loud speaker, judging by the way L spoke.

As he listen it was clear that either L was done asking them about their opinions and ideals on the Kira case…or hadn't had time yet. Raito couldn't help but snicker a bit as he listened in on a very interesting conversation.

"-no Mello for the tenth time you may not go visit the chocolate factory…why? Because for many reasons not excluding that's it's a very shady place that even I've never been too…I already told you I don't care if you take pepper spray with you…no means no…yes I'm already aware of the increase of missing children in that area…I have it on good faith that several other detectives while not as good as I are already on the case and should have it solved soon…yes I know that the chocolate factory is more then likely behind it, as do the detectives…so there is no reason for you to go under cover on it…Matt will you please just give Mello some chocolate or something?! No means No Mello get over it!...Yes Near I am aware that Mello will try to sneak out anyway…I've already e-mailed Roger about the updated security…and no Mello you can't get Matt to override it…because I said so!! Listen for a moment…Near no I will not endanger Matt or Mello like that…No! You may not have them embezzle money for you to buy some toy!...I don't care if it's a limited edition…I don't care if it's dirty money it's still stolen goods all the same…Yes Roger I hear you, what else did they do since I last called…Matt hacked the FBIs files again?!...and the CIA and Defense system…that's it you are all grounded! No buts! Mello you are on a rationed diet of chocolate, only two bars a day for a month…don't curse at me or I'll take it all away…Matt no computer access…or cigarettes for two months…Near…yes you will be punished also…hmmm…you may help Mrs. Hollow in the cafeteria…Yes I know you dislike her and that's why I'm doing it…now I hope this teaches you to behave yourselves…either that or not to get caught…Kidding Roger I'm kidding!!! I have to go now behave yourselves and with some luck I'll see you soon…If I need anymore advice I'll contact you…yes…yes…ok bye."

"Wow L…that was very…umm what's the word I'm looking for…ah I know you remind me of dad."

"Shut up Raito-kun,"

"Aww but you make such a good daddy all authority and stern like."

"And does that make you their mommy then?"

Raito chocked and shot L a glare that could melt even the coldest glaciers.

L just smirked in response.

"Excuse me gentlemen?"

Both Raito and L spun around as Watari's voice sounded out near the door.

L was the first one to recover from the unexpected shock that Watari had produced with his unexpected arrival.

"Yes what is it Watari?"

"Ah yes Hanako-san has asked me if either of you would be interesting in joining her and her husband for dinner tonight. I've already informed her that it wouldn't be in the best interest of…Hikaru-san here because of his condition but she wouldn't hear the answer no unless I came right up and asked. Will I be right in assuming that the answer is no?"

L looked at Raito in question. Raito thought about it for a second, while it would have been nice to have a home cooked meal and everything, it wouldn't be possible at this time. There was too much to do and they didn't have the leisure of taking that kind of break, he knew that L thought the same but felt gratitude that L had looked at Raito to see what he wanted to do. It felt nice that L would even consider taking that kind of break if Raito felt the need too. Raito smiled a bit sadly at L and shook his head signaling his decision; L nodded his head in respond. Raito then turned to Watari and gave him their answer.

"Thanks Watari but I'm afraid that L and I will have to decline that tempting offer, we have too much work to do and we can't afford to waste any time. Offer our apologizes?"

Watari smiled.

"Of course Raito-san, I figured at much, well I'll just be going now, I'll bring you both some food later then. If you need me just call or page me. I'll be out doing some errands, and yes L I'll bring some cake back with me."

L who had his mouth open to speak closed it with a snap and managed to look a bit sheepish. Watari knew him too well to the point of him even answering before L spoke. Which sometimes alternated between a good and bad thing.

Watari chuckled as he turned around to leave, before he left he stopped by the door and turned his head back at them, and with a calm voice and expression he said something that made Raito alternate between blushing and laughing.

"And to add to your conversation from before I think both of you would make wonderful parents."

L spun his chair around and for lack of a better word sputtered a bit in shock. A rosy blush lined his cheeks in an adorable fashion.

Raito couldn't help it, he broke out laughing.

---

Yea I know, this is hell of a short chapter but hey it's an update! Kind of a filler chapter though huh?

But oh well, oh and that one-sided phone call? That's the most that you'd probably see of the Wammy boys in this story, if I do the sequel and that's a mighty if…they'd have a main part in it but because of their ages, among other things I don't really want to put them in this story.

So sorry folks.

Oh remember my mini story "Sparks of Darkness within the Light"? I've finished the final chapter, you know L's chapter? It's up and done with so go check it out, it's 21 pages long so it took me a while. Please go over and review I would really appreciate it.

Please take the time to review, it really does help me feel better about my story…oh and on a side note, if anyone wants to do any fan-art, please feel free to do so! Just show me please so I could gush in happiness.


	22. Chapter 22

Ok here's the deal peps…my baby sister just got in a car crash. Not just a small one either, the only car in our family is totaled beyond belief, luckily though she's relatively unhurt. She had swerved hard on the road because a deer had jumped out from the fucking trees…she flipped her car into a hug ditch. I got a call at freaking 7 in the morning from my mom telling me that my sister was in the ER.

And you want to know the really messed up thing? I freaking had a dream that she died in a car crash the night before!!!

How messed up is that?!

If anything had happened to her…well let's just say you'd probably never hear from me again because I've would have lost any interest in writing.

Sniff...I love my family…

So in celebration that my sister is ok I've decided to post another update and since it's only been about two or so days since my last one this one will also be short but hey like I said it's an update.

Also I will have the next chapter out soon because I'm in such a good mood…and guess what…IT WILL BE A LEMON! THE WHOLE FREAKING CHAPTER WILL BE A LEMON…but I also am having a sadistic feeling lately so…who knows when it will be put up?

Heheh…evil cackle.

This chapter is dedicated to Barranca! Because she(he?) was the only one to figure out the truth! Hehe go Barranca!! Hope you enjoy this new chapter!

Picks up right after the last chapter-enjoy!

---

After Raito recovered from his laughing fit he back to face L, whose face seemed to be warring between bemused and annoyed, it finally settled into amusement as L finally saw the funny side of what Watari had said.

Raito smiled in return before his face sobered up and took the turn for the serious.

"Ok L before you tell me what the kids had to say let me show you what I found out about our little fake Kiras."

So Raito told L about his theory about a Kira cult group that was more then likely attending Mikami's collage and showed him the site that he found that told little about the collage. Without saying it they both felt very suspicious at the lack of information that the site provided of the collage. It told the location and the general classes that were taught but little else. The names of the teachers and headmaster weren't available as well as any other kind personal information, not even a phone number. They did have an e-mail address though.

He could tell that L found his theory worth pursuing by the way his was biting his thumb and had that far away look in his eyes that he always got when he was thinking and analyzing a situation.

"I believe Raito-kun that your theory is quite sound, and with what Roger has told me about cults it seems that a collage campus would be a breeding ground for it, young impressible minds who are ignorant enough to think they know how the world works. My statistics show that 74 percent of Kira supporters are between the ages of 17 to 34. So a collage campus…makes sense, almost too much so."

Raito raised an eyebrow.

"You think it's a trap? Something to lead us to them or them to us?"

L shrugged.

"Could be, but even if that were so…you really think that would stop us?"

Raito chuckled.

"No L, even if it was a trap…we'd have the advantage of knowing it was one beforehand and…what was it my sister once said? Oh right because we know it might be a trap beforehand we won't be caught unaware with our pants down."

Now it was L's turn to raise an eyebrow, the smirk that crossed his face though was new.

"Oh? Interesting choice of words…Raito love."

Raito blushed as he saw the leer on L's face.

"Stop it, we don't have time right now for that, we need to get back to work, besides the sooner we catch these guys and burn the deathnotes the sooner we'll have time to ourselves without interruptions."

L smiled in agreement before turning back to his computer and started to hack the systems.

"Well then Raito-kun let's get to work now shall we."

---

While both of them were working L managed to tell Raito about what the Wammy household have said.

"Both Mello and Matt agreed that the only way that the Kiras could have found out about where we had been staying was if someone in their group was a very talented hacker and somehow had hacked into our systems, but it seems that Near disagrees with this and says that they must have connections of some sort, either with the police or…quite possibly us."

Raito looked at him in slight confusion.

"Us?...like in the team or…?"

"As in my job connections, as in…someone from either Wammy House or one of our contacts."

"Hmm…makes sense I suppose, both of their theories are sound, but instead of either of them being right and the other wrong…what if their both right?"

L looked down and frowned.

"Then Raito-kun…we might just be in a bit of trouble."

Raito snorted.

"Like we weren't to begin with, we seem to attract trouble like a magnet."

"Touché Raito-kun."

Raito sighed, he could tell that L was getting irritated, it was getting late and both of them were tired. Watari had come up with some food a couple of hours ago. A tuna sandwich and plain salad for Raito and a chocolate cream cake with snickerdoodle cookies for L. Raito had managed to get a tiny bit of the salad into L before L stuck in fingers into the cream cake and smeared it all over Raito's face. To say that Raito had been annoyed would have been an understatement. But that was before L helped him clean it off…with his tongue.

Raito moaned as L's tongue swept along his cheek, gently cleaning off the clotted cream that he himself had smeared on there. It caused chills that alternated between hot and cold to run down Raito's spine. The small hairs on his body seemed to become electrified as L continued to sweep his tongue along his face, turning from his cheek towards Raito's jaw line, alternating between licking and nibbling. Raito let out another moan as he raised his arms to wrap around L's neck, he tilted his head back, in a silent pled. Just as L's head bent down to sweep his agile tongue along Raito's bared white neck a knock sounded at the door.

Raito could literally feel L's annoyance at being interrupted as he moved away from Raito back to his own chair.

Raito couldn't tell if he was annoyed or grateful that Watari had chosen that time to come back in to take the dirty plates. On one hand he had been enjoying himself immensely but on the other they both had to get back to work. It was a catch 50-50 in this case. Damn if he did…horny if he didn't.

Raito sighed to himself as he looked at his computer clock, it was already ten o'clock at night and he was exhausted, maybe all the drama that's been happening to him lately was catching up. He had hardly left this room all day and it was starting to show. He just wanted to go back to his and L's room and curl up on their bed. He knew that there wasn't much more they could do that night, he had spent the entire day trying to get information on the collage but to no such luck, if not for the site and Mikami's own records he would have said that no such collage existed. So in short of storming over there he had nothing. He could guess from the slight steamed huffs from next to him that L was having the same problems.

Raito had a plan though, it had been building up in his head all day and he was 90 percent sure that it would work, the only thing that stood in it's way was getting L to agree to it…which unfortunately he knew would be a challenge in and all itself.

Raito turned his head from where he had been resting it to look at him. L had his face planted right in front of the computer screen and his fingers moving as rapidly now as they did several hours ago. Raito wasn't quite sure what L was doing right now but even if L were to explain it to him right then his tired mind probably wouldn't have been able to understand what he was saying.

He knew that L would want to stay up for a couple more hours to get more work done, but Raito knew that he would let Raito go to bed early if he so desired, which he really did.

"Hey L I'm going to head back now, I don't think I'm going to be much use to you like this."

L stopped typing and turned to face him, L took in the pale face and dim gazed eyes. Letting his concern show in his face and voice L agreed.

"Sure Raito-kun, I myself will be heading to bed soon as well, there isn't much we can do right now and until we've come up with an alternate plan of action I'm afraid I'm all out of ideas."

Raito nodded his head and decided that now wasn't the time to spring his own idea yet. No doubt that it will lead to arguing and fighting, and Raito wasn't up for that quite yet. Later perhaps but not when he was dead beat tired.

"Thanks L, make sure that you get some rest tonight ok?"

With that Raito leaned forward and gently kissed L, letting his lips just lay there, barely touching L's own soft ones. Slowly he moved them, causing the kiss to become firmer as well as wetter as he opened his mouth to invite L inside, his lips move and slide on L's in a harsh manner which caused both of them to release soft moans as heat began to build up between them once more. Before it could turn into anything more though Raito moved back.

"…goodnight Lawliet."

L's eyes were bright with passion and his lips were slightly swollen, Raito could literally see him holding himself back from pouncing onto him. L barely managed to nod his head in agreement.

"Goodnight Raito-kun, sweet dreams…"

Raito smiled before turning around and walking out the door, leaving L to his discomforting state of arousal, not that Raito was in a much better state but it still was kind of fun to leave L wanting. Maybe it would teach him a lesson.

When he had given Raito the tongue bath earlier, then not finishing what he started and leaving Raito agonizingly hard for what seemed like hours after the mentioned accident.

He walked into their suite and suppressed a yawn. He really was tired, as he changed into a pair of pajamas he looked over at a pile of suitcases and bags that weren't there this morning. Watari must have put them in here while they'd been working in the other room.

Raito walked over to them and decided to sort through them, while he was tired he did want to see what Watari had brought them, besides if any of the suitcases had any of his own clothes then he knew that most of them would need to be either hung up or folded to perfection.

Opening the first of the suit cases he saw that it was filled with nothing but bleach white long sleeved shirts, L's then.

Sorting though them he found that 4 of the suitcases were his and 3 of them were L's. He quickly folded up his pants and put them in the dresser that came with the room. He also found the closet and hung up all of his shirts, making a mental note to iron them when he had the chance. He had also placed L's clothes into drawers as well. He figured that they didn't need hanging, at least he never remembered L hanging his clothes up. Of course he remembered that L frequently slept in his clothes, forgetting to change his clothes before he fell asleep.

Raito shuddered as his nose crinkled up is disgust, the idea of sleeping in clothes that you wore for a whole day…just ew. He'd make sure to break L of that habit soon enough, for both of their sakes.

Turning back around he noticed that there was one more bag left, it was quite a bit smaller then the rest and he didn't think that it contended clothes.

Walking back he opened it and felt his jaw drop. Inside of the small bag were photos of his family and a few other personal affects…along with his stuffed bear Ryu.

'I can't believe I forgot about it…I must have left it at headquarters and Watari was kind enough to pick it up while he evacuated. I wonder though where he got these photos? Maybe dad gave them to him? More then likely. Huh…'

Raito reached in and took out the photos, walking around he put them on the bedside table, rearranging them until he was satisfied. There were three of them, one was of when Sayu had been born, it had him sitting down on the floor with his little baby sister in his arms, the smile on his face could only be described as sincere, something that became less frequent as he grow. He couldn't even remember the last time he had felt that sincere as a child. It seemed after Sayu had been born that that sincere feeling had washed away. At least until he met L, even as Kira his feelings had been sincere…of course it had been at that time a sincere feeling of hate and malice. But that had changed of course, now it was a sincere feeling of love and devotion.

Shaking his head Raito looked over at another one of the pictures.

One of the other pictures had been taken on his 13th birthday, Raito remember it, him and his family had gone to the beach that day. He remembered that he'd gotten sunburn later on in the day but this picture had been taken when they had just got there, he had his arms wrapped around his little sister while his mom had been standing beside him with one of her arms wrapped around him in a semi-hug, his father had also been standing beside him, one of his arms had been wrapped around his wife and the other one had been placed on Raito's shoulder.

The last one was the most recent out of the three, it had been taken about two years ago, when he had graduated junior high, everyone had been in this picture as well, his father's and mother's faces were aglow with pride and happiness, his sister's face had been pleased and impish, she had goosed him right after the photo had been taken, he remembered his family's laughter like it was a fading dream…but it wasn't them that took up his attention, it was himself.

His eyes in the photo…Raito shuddered. It seemed that he'd been detaching himself even then. His eyes were cold and distant, showing that he'd been entirely bored with the whole process. At least that was what Raito saw; he knew if anyone else looked at the photo all they'd see was a happy teenager who was contented with his happy life and couldn't wait until high school. Lies.

Shaking his head to clear it, he turned away from the table and walked back to the bag to pick up the small stuffed animal. Taking it out he held it to his chest for a moment, he didn't know why, maybe he hoped that he would be able to soak up happier days from the old plush toy, after a minute though he sighed and placed it on the small desk right beside the photos, letting it lean against them while not covering them in the process.

That done he decided he better get some sleep before it got much later. Tomorrow would be a big day for him, the day he needed to convince L of his master plan…his very dangerous and low level of success plan that could wind up endangering everyone he'd ever known.

Sighing he turned off the light and got into the bed and pulled the covers over his head.

Letting deep sleep take him he didn't even notice the sound of a panicked distant voice try to call out to him from deep inside of his mind…nor that a little white notebook was nowhere to be found.

---

What will happen next?

You will just have to wait to find out won't ya! Haha though you might have to wait till the chapter after next…you know…because the next chapter will have little plot in it…heheh

PLEASE REVIEW!!! I WANT TO GET TO 500 REVIEWS BEFORE CHAPTER 25 IS DONE!!

Will I make it? I don't know…it's all up to you folks! Keep those beautiful reviews coming! PLEASE!!!


	23. Chapter 23

Ok people let me make something clear for all of you who have commented on this. I never once said I was going to stop updating if I didn't make 500 reviews. I only said if my sister had DIED would I stop. I only wanted to see if I COULD get 500 reviews before chapter 25. If I don't that's fine with me, it was just a personal little challenge. But looking now…hehe I think I'm going to go over 500. Happy!

So you all have no worries, I will NOT be discontinuing or abandoning this story!

Now this is going to be a short chapter because it's nothing but smut, there won't be any plot…I think.

**Warning people this will be a Lemon chapter!** If that discomforts you in any way then I implore you to just ignore this chapter, though I would wonder why anyone who has read my story up to this point would want too but I do know that their are many of you out there who can't handle lemons, limes and make-outs sessions sure but sex…for those of you who want to skip this chapter I will try to get the next chapter (sex free) one out as soon as possible for you too read.

Thank you everyone who has reviewed! You are all made of complete awesomeness! Really!!

L loves you all more then cake! And Ryuk gives you his precious apples!! FOR FREE!! I know…be amazed at my magic!

--

As Raito slept curled up in the warm bed he dreamed that he was floating in an endless gray space, cocooned in warmth, it was a nice feeling if a bit discomforting. Because he didn't dream often, or at least not as much as normal humans do he had a second to feel surprise before the warmth made him lethargic enough not to care.

Most of the time when he slept his brain would either shut down completely or did the complete opposite and subconsciously schemed up plans and ideas, when that happens though most of the time when he wakes up the next morning the ideas float away before he could grasp them. He doesn't really mind because most of the idea's his subconscious came up with were physically impossible and just plain silly.

Kangaroos will not be nuking Australia and becoming the dominate species on earth any time soon, nor will penguins and the extinct dodo bird start to build towering buildings and statues in honor of the kangaroos. Sometimes his superior brain scared even him.

As Raito was drifting inside the calm space he felt something tugging him into wakefulness, fighting it was hopeless so Raito left the warm gray world and opened his eyes into sleepy slits as he felt the bed sift behind him. Feeling like his head weighed at least a ton he turned he head to look behind him to see who had disturbed his sleep. As it was still very dark out he couldn't see very well but he was able to make out the outline of someone. As the person moved closer and closer to him Raito started to become more alert.

"…Lawliet…?"

"Shhhh"

"What are you-"

Just as Raito was about to ask him what he was doing Raito found himself suddenly cut off mid word by a pair of warm lips.

Raito while surprised by the suddenness of it did nothing but mumbled in slight protest before pressing his own lips gently to the ones on top of him, besides if L wanted to kiss him then why should he protest when he enjoyed it just as much?

L's smooth tongue slid along Raito's lips demanding entrance that Raito was all too happy to give.

Raito moaned as he parted his lips and let L slip his tongue inside his mouth, thus began a battle of saliva and clashing teeth as they both battled for dominance in the kiss, normally Raito would decided that L could have the lead but he decided that this time L would have to fight for the honor of being top.

Raito lifted his hands so that they could bury themselves in L's unruly silky hair as their mouths clashed fiercely.

Raito broke the almost punishing kiss to gulp in some much needed air, he smirked as the man on top of him panted for breath as well.

L not to be outdone ducked his head and placed his mouth onto Raito's neck. Teeth immediately started to nibble and bite at the soft velvet skin, Raito moaned as he tilted his head back so that L could have access to more of his skin. Already Raito could feel the beginning of love bits start to welt on his abused skin.

Raito would have rolled his eyes if he had the mental ability at the moment as he felt L's lips smirk on his neck. But because he was too lost in the pleasurable pain of L's teeth on his neck he just twisted his hands in L's hair and yanked.

He felt L winch a bit at the stinging pain, Raito only had a second to feel triumph before crying out in shock and arousal as L unexpectedly sat up and proceed to rip his pajama shirt in two, L then leaned down and licked his chest, lapping at the sweat stained skin before moving onto Raito's rosy brown nipple were he proceeded to lick and lap at it until it was standing stiff.

Raito moaned with abandon as L's continued to abuse his sensitive flesh until it was red and sore. When L deemed it sore enough he gave it a soft kiss before moving onto the other one and lavishing it with the same treatment.

"Arhh…L…_please_-"

Raito cursed himself as he called out in broken pleasure. It seemed that L had won the first round.

Raito didn't know when he started to consider this is terms of a game but he guessed it was just a part of his and L's relationship, they never not fought or played in terms of games and battles.

But this was quite different from his last great battle with the great L that was for sure.

Deciding that he let L have his fun long enough Raito made his move before he became too lost in the pleasure that L was lavishing him in.

Lifting his legs and hooking them around L's waist Raito flipped their positions so that now L was the one laying on the bed and Raito was the one above him, only managing it because he was able to catch L by surprise.

Quickly taking advantage before L recovered from his surprise Raito smashed his mouth harshly on L's, kissing and sucking with a singularly determination to overwhelm. Letting his hands wander downwards he grabbed the ends of L's shirt and with one harsh tug he broke the kiss to yank it off his slim torso.

"Ehh Raito-kun…"

"Shush L"

Raito quickly claimed L's mouth and while L was once again distracted as they both battled with their mouths Raito moved his hands along L's naked chest and sides. Making sure that his creases were gentle yet hard enough to be felt he lightly stroke L's stomach muscles, Raito himself felt light headed as he felt the skin and muscles underneath him shiver and clench as his hands fondled around the smooth skin.

Raito knew that this seemingly submission of L wouldn't last long, L always had to have control, this compliance was a show of how much L cared for him that he would willingly become helpless for a while to allow Raito the pleasure of dominance in their relationship.

It warmed Raito that L would do this for him, yet it also annoyed him as well. A devious thought crossed his mind as he and L broke for air.

Before L could reclaim his lips Raito shimmered downwards so that his mouth was level with L's navel. Smirking upwards at L's startled face he stuck out his tongue and licked a trail from L's lower stomach to the top of his pants, letting his tongue dip down ever so little underneath them to tease at the skin underneath.

"Ahh! Raito-kuunnnn…"

Raito felt pale hands start to tug on his untidy hair, it was unclear if the hands were telling him to stop or keep going, not that it really mattered to Raito, he had one a goal in mind and nothing was going to impede him from it.

Unbuttoning L's pants with nimble fingers Raito yanked them down to knee length, not having the patience to take them off fully.

Raito wasn't at all surprised to see L went commando. I mean if the guy wouldn't even wear socks then what hope was there for underwear?

Not that Raito was complaining right now, oh no. He was all for no underwear at this point.

Raito stared down at the engorged erection in front of him. For a moment he felt a sense of panic. But looking back up into L's sweat streaked face dissolved any sense of panic or fright.

Turning back towards the slightly leaking head, Raito delicately swiped the tip with his tongue, vaguely hearing the cry of pleasure above him he decided that he liked the flavor and started to lap more firmly at the quivering member.

The taste of L's semen exploded on his taste buds as more of it leaked out of the tip into Raito's eager mouth, the flavor of it reminded Raito vaguely of cherries of all things, not at all what he had expected it to taste like; it was far sweeter tasting then he could have imagined.

And he wanted more.

Widening his mouth so that he could take more of L's huge member into his mouth he hollowed out his cheeks, taking great care not to scrap the piece of hard flesh with his teeth.

As soon as he felt the top of the head touch the back of his throat he stopped moving. He had only gotten about half of the member into his mouth, feeling a sense of annoyance and admiration at the size of L's penis Raito set one of his hands firmly on L's hip so that L wouldn't accidently buckle upwards and chock him.

Ignoring the sounds around him and the persistent yanking of his hair, Raito started to suck and lick the engorged member in mouth. Pulling back he started to tongue the slit of L's continues leaking member. He used his other hand to fondle L's balls, rolling them in his sweaty palm and tugging on them gently.

"Ahh!...Raito…arh…"

If Raito could have smirked he would have, bobbing his head up and down on L's shaft he twisted his tongue around inside his mouth. Going by the moans coming from L's gasping mouth it seemed that he was doing a good job of it.

He could tell by the tenseness of L's muscles that L was starting to get impatient with his submissive role, Raito knew that at any second L would be switching their positions around.

'Not that I mind that…ah well it was fun while it lasted, who knew that L would make such a cute looking uke-chan? I better not tell that to his face though.'

Raito's prediction seemed to be corrected for not ten seconds later Raito felt L's long legs hook themselves around him like he had done earlier to L and flip them smoothly so that now Raito was the one laying flat on his back with L looming over him with a perverted smile. Raito had made sure to take his mouth from L's penis the moment he had felt L tense up, it wouldn't have been in anyone's interest if he had accidently bite down.

"I believe Raito-kun that someone has forgotten who the seme in this relationship is and just who is the uke."

Raito smirked upwards into L's sweat streaked face.

"Oh I don't know L…I think I was just demonstrating who the seme and uke was not two seconds ago."

The growl that came from L's mouth seemed to surprise them both.

"I think Raito-kun that the time for foreplay is over."

Raito couldn't help but seize up in alarm. He knew what was going to happen now…he'd been mentally preparing himself for a while for this exact act but…it didn't mean he wasn't still scared of the unknown.

L as if sensing his feelings on the matter bent down and softly started to kiss his face. Cheeks-forehead-eyelids-nose-chin, Raito could feel his panic fading away at the show of affection and love from L. By the time L had gotten to his lips Raito was totally relaxed and blushing very lightly.

"Are you sure about this Raito? Because we don't have to do this now, there are many other things we could do instead."

Raito rolled his eyes and let out a sigh, but it was more for show as his chest felt like it would burst with the warm feelings of affection and love he held for the ravened hair man above him. L Lawliet truly did care for him and it warmed his heart to think that despite everything that he had done to the man L could still find it in his heart to love him.

"L just get on with it before you ruin the mood."

L chuckled as he stood up to remove the rest of his clothing; Raito did the same as well. Before L threw his pants across the room he not so subtly removed something from on of the large pockets.

"L?"

"Just something that we're going to need."

As L showed Raito what he had brought Raito felt his face light up. A tube of strawberry lube.

"A-aah right."

Raito felt the beginning of nervousness coming back and pushed it down ruthlessly. He wanted this and L wanted this. Why would he ruin it because he'd never done it before? As they say…there was a first time for everything.

Raito leaned back onto the bed and stared up into the dark and hungry eyes of his lover. L hadn't moved from his spot by the bed, he was to busy staring transfixed at Raito's flushed and sweaty features.

Raito could feel a bit of his confidence returning as he stared at L's slack jawed face. It did good to his ego that L was so armored by him that he forgot what he was doing.

"Ahem if L-kun has changed his mind about being the seme then all he has to do is say so and hand me the lube instead."

Raito's smug voice seemed to shake L out of his mesmerize state. He shot Raito an annoyed look that quickly became a devious smirk instead. Before Raito had the chance to feel worried L made his move and literally pounced onto Raito.

Raito would never admit on pain of death that he had shrieked in surprise.

"L-kun Raito?"

Raito flushed at L's deceitfully innocent curious face.

"I just thought it sounded…nice."

L smiled down at Raito's blushing face as Raito stared at the ceiling like it held all the answers of the universe, unwilling to look at L's face in the case that he was being laughed at.

Raito blinked as he felt a butterfly kiss on his nose. Moving his eyes from the ceiling he looked at L's sincere face.

"I don't mind Raito-kun…in fact I think it sounds nice as well."

Raito smiled in relief and happiness which soon turned into a gasp as he felt something cold touch his member.

"Ahh!"

L's chuckle was positively evil in nature.

Just as it processed in Raito's mind that L must have spread some of the lube onto his erection he felt some of the coolness touch his opening. Gasping and moaning Raito stared upwards at L's deviously smiling face as L's well lubed fingers started to circle his opening. Not quite pushing in but definitely teasing.

"You-ah…hha are…ahh…evil L-kun…umm."

Raito was panting harshly now, while it felt strange for someone to be touching him down there L was perfectly distracting him by fisting his erection. L's flexible fingers were sending pleasurable waves from both places and it was all Raito could do to stay still.

Finally it became too much and Raito pushed down on the fingers that still were only just teasing. He moaned loudly as one of the fingers pushed past his opening muscle. His moan was answered with an answering moan from the flushed man atop him.

It seemed L was also tired of teasing because he started to push his finger in and out of Raito's tight ring.

Soon another was joining the other and Raito started to feel a slight burning pain but he ignored it, he had of course expected it to hurt in the beginning but he knew any pain or uncomfortable feeling would be worth it.

Raito felt overwhelmed, with both stimulations he knew he wouldn't be able to last much longer. He needed L now.

"L please"

He felt more then saw L's agreement, L pulled out both of his fingers and let go of Raito's leaking member causing Raito to moan out in disappointment.

Raito could hear L opening the tube of lube up and lathering himself generously, he couldn't help but move his eyes from the dark ceiling to where he knew L was kneeling.

Raito gasped as he stared at the picture of sexiness that L made at the moment. For once L's back was completely straightened out as he arched upwards as his own hand pumped his member so that it was completely slicked up. L's mouth was opened and his eyes were unseeing as he unintentionally pleasured himself for Raito's pleasurable viewing.

"Beautiful"

Raito didn't realize he had spoken out loud until L's gaze turned back to him.

"Don't say such things Raito-kun."

Raito frowned a little as he realized that L didn't believe what he said.

"Raito-kun can say what he believes L-kun, and he believes that you are beautiful."

L stared at him in doubt, but there was a hint of humor in his eyes as well.

"Raito-kun shouldn't try to copy Misa's talk in third person. It just doesn't work as well, besides she only does it to be cute and stupid…which you aren't."

L must have realized that he had unintentional insulted him because he hurriedly continued before Raito could comment.

"-Stupid I mean. Raito is plenty cute of course."

Raito snorted in amusement.

"Of course, but if I'm cute then that must mean that you are beautiful."

L sent him an exasperated look before deciding to just drop the conversation.

Raito yelped as he hadn't been prepared for L to suddenly to grab his legs and hoist them onto his shoulders.

Realizing what was going to happen next his breath started to grow heavy as L's hands gripped his thighs in a harsh hold that Raito didn't even feel. He was too busy staring up into L's eyes as they stared right back into his.

He could feel the head of L's erection at his entrance, poised waiting to enter.

Why waiting?

As Raito looked up into L's strained eyes the answer came to him. He smiled up into L's face and reached out a hand to lightly touch L's cheek.

"I love you L Lawliet"

The sudden intensity of emotion in L's eyes took him by surprise, but then L's eyes had always been somewhat unreadable, even when Raito had confessed at being Kira and told L that he loved him before. Now though…they were open completely. No hiding, no shadows, just light, wonderful beautiful light. Light filled with almost overwhelming emotion. Love, affection, slight fear, determination, so many emotions swarming together in those beautiful midnight eyes…

Raito cried out as L surged forward and buried himself inside him with one forceful thrust, it took Raito by surprise so he hadn't even tensed up. The feeling of being filled so completely filled Raito. He didn't even feel the pain of being stretched, all he felt was waves of pure pleasure.

"Ah Lawliet!"

"Arg…Raito"

L waited a moment for him to adjust before he pulled out almost entirely before filling him once again with the same brutal force, soon L had a rhythm going. Raito couldn't help but cry out ever time. The feeling…it was so good.

After a few minutes Raito felt L's member hit something inside of him that made his see white and actually made him scream out in pleasure.

L didn't even pause in his thrusts except to change his angle so he hit the same spot again and again.

Sweat poured from their bodies as they moved in prefect rhythm to the other. Raito slammed his hips upwards as L thrust down. The sound of flesh slapping flesh sounded around them as Raito's ass smacked against L's balls and thighs. The sound just caused Raito to feel all the more heated. The squishy sound of L's sizable penis going in and out of himself…it was all becoming too much for Raito.

"Ahh ohhh faster…hhahha harder…"

L answered Raito's pled by losing all rhythm and pounding in him with abandon.

"AH! Yes! Lawliet-kun! Ahhh"

"Ngh-Raito I-"

Raito could feel the moment L came undone, the warm rush that entered him and the cry of completion was enough to also send him over then end as well. Raito cried out as a orgasm hit him so hard that he temporarily blacked out.

When he could see again he saw that L was carefully lowering his legs from around his neck. Raito felt completely spent, the pleasurable haze had yet to leave him. All he wanted to do now was curl up with L and sleep the rest of the night away.

He sighed as L fell onto the bed beside him. He could feel L grab onto one of their shirts that hadn't fallen from the bed from their activity and wipe away the semen left on their skin. When that was done L threw the shirt across the room and pulled the blankets onto of both of them.

Raito curled up as L's arms reached around him in an embrace. With his head resting on L's chest Raito could feel sleep reaching for him.

Right before sleep took him he heard a whisper in the dark.

"I love you too Yagami Raito."

Raito smiled before letting the darkness take him.

---

Originally this was all going to be nothing but a dream of Raito's…but then it became really long and plot-like instead of the mindless lemon I was TRYING to write…I'm sad at myself right now, I can't even write a completely pointless porno scene…sniff.(cries in a corner.)

The reason I'm a little upset right now is because I had the next few chapters plotted out(in my mind-aka the scary place) in the direction that this chapter was all a dream and Raito would wake up really pissed and angry and sexually frustrated…but nope.

I made it so that they REALLY did have sex instead of Raito just having a frustrating wet dream instead.

Oh well…at least neither of them are virgins anymore. Win.

This will more then likely be the only lemon in the story…I suck monkey ass at writing them (at least I think so…I don't know maybe it was good-shrug- I'm a terrible self critic as you can see)

I made it more complicated then it needed to be. There will be limes and all that but…maybe I'll get someone else to write them or at least help me write any future sex scenes. Maybe.

So I hope you liked it, if not that's ok I understand. (Not really I would be heartbroken…just kidding.) XD

Please feel free to tell me the truth in how I did…was it realistic enough? Hot enough? Did anyone get really hot and sweaty from reading it? XD (Just kidding)

(Oh and the dream/plan that Raito's mind came up with, the one with the kangaroos, It was my dream…shudders. I scare myself.)

Reviews are like the water of life, it helps keep the story alive and kicking. Please take the time to leave a comment or two. It would be really appreciated.


	24. Chapter 24

Oh my Kira…another update so darn soon (author checks to see if she's been taken over by a pod person)…nope I don't think so…wow just…WoW

Thank you everyone who was so nice to me in their reviews. So many of you out there thought my lemon was great (or at least good enough to read) I was shocked and very very touched…I will not cry…sniff…shit I'm really crying. T^T

I love you all…(stuffs head into a pillow and has a good cry)

…

…

…Okay I'm alright now…I think I needed that in the worse and best way possible. Exhale and cry out those negative self criticism demons!

Alrighty then I know that these last few chapters have been very short, but I figured that everyone would rather have short but frequently updated chapters then long monthly updates.

If not then feel free to **review** or PM or E-mail me to tell me otherwise.

I hope you enjoy this chapter filled with suspense and plot and all that good cliff-hanger goodness…hehe I was going to wait a week to post this but I couldn't hold onto it once it finished…

---

Raito felt his jaw crack as he let out a yawn, while last night had certainly been pleasurable it had definitely tired him out, as well as leave him sore and aching. It was very discomforting to sit straight in a chair but he wouldn't have had it any other way. There was no way he was going to slouch in his work chair like L.

It was around ten in the morning of the next day. Both he and L were already back in their office working. Having woken up first this morning Raito had just laid there staring at the man who was cradled in his arms. It seemed that sometime in the night they had traded places. L was now lying in his arms, cuddled with his head on Raito's chest; his own arms huddled under his chin in adorable cute fashion. It was one of the most endearing sights Raito had ever seen. He hadn't had the heart to wake the sleeping man. It had still been early so Raito just waited for L to wake naturally.

When he had finally begun to wake up Raito couldn't help but lean forward and kiss the sleepy eyed man. But before it could progress into anything else Watari had chosen that moment to knock on the door and announce that breakfast was ready and he was coming in.

Both he and L must have broken some record in how fast they had gotten dressed so they wouldn't be caught butt naked by the older man. After enjoying a lovely meal and thanking Watari they both decided they needed a shower, they were both still sticky from last night's activity. After much deliberation they decided that they would take separate showers only because they both needed to get back to work and taking a shower together wouldn't speed things up at all despite the pleasurable aspects of the idea.

Once they were both clean they walked to the office and got to work, L was contacting his agents and contacts in the hope that someone knew something about the strange collage or the new Kira and Raito…well he was trying to look like he was being productive. In reality he was trying to figure out the best way for him to tell L about his plan. Also he was feeling a bit out of sorts. It didn't have anything to do with last night he was sure but he couldn't help but feel a nagging sensation in his gut. Something was wrong but for the life of him he couldn't figure it out.

'Maybe it's because I haven't been in my shinigami form for a while? That could be it…hmm…well I might as well, and being in that form might also help my argument with L.'

Having decided that that was what he would do Raito turned to look at L who was still talking on the phone, Raito guessed that they were talking in some dialect of Spanish because he didn't quite understand. Raito decided to just wait patiently for him to get off the phone before trying to get his attention. It would have been very rude otherwise.

Raito's eyes began to roam over the stunning figure beside him. L's hair was still wet from the shower so it looked much tamer with the usually wild locks framing his face instead of flaring outward. The shadows underneath his eyes seemed to have lessened a bit as well making his eyes seem less huge. His eyes themselves were glistening with feeling, no longer were they filled with apathy. It made L's whole demeanor change, his skin glowed with aliveness.

It was a beautiful sight to behold and Raito couldn't help but feel pride and happiness that it had been him that had caused L this change. L was happy that much was obvious. He was happy with _him_.

'He's just so…'

Raito sighed as even his brain couldn't come up with a prefect word to express what L was. If Raito himself wasn't so happy he would have been disgusted with himself over how much he sounded like a mooning love struck girl.

"Hello Raito-kun? Earth to Raito, wake up."

Raito startled as a hand suddenly waved in front of his face. Turning red he pushed it away. It seemed he had spaced out longer then he had thought. Pushing the red from his face Raito raised an eyebrow at the bemused man sitting beside him.

"Yes L?"

"I was just asking Raito-kun if he had something he wanted to say. You've been staring at me for the past ten minutes."

Raito flushed red again before he could stop it, ignoring L's chuckling he told L what he was going to do and the reason for it.

L nodded as he listened to Raito's explanation. When Raito was finished speaking L leaned back in thought.

"Well if you believe that this feeling that you have is because you haven't taken your other form then you should of course change. But I would like to say that in no way am I going to knock you out again Raito. If you want to become conscious then you better find a different way."

Raito nodded his head.

"I know L. I wouldn't ask that of you. I've already got a better idea, if I meditate deep enough I should be able to access my shinigami form without having to become unconscious."

"That sounds reasonable."

"Yep, so don't bother me for a while, I've never really done this before but I already looked up instructions, so I should be able to figure it out."

L nodded before turning back around to his own computer. When Raito was sure that L's concentration was fully on the computer he closed his eyes. Breathing deeply before letting out a deep breath, Raito started to disconnect himself from the outside world around him, sounds and the like soon began to fade away until it there was nothing but silence around him. After dealing with the outside he turned inward. He didn't force himself to not think but relaxed himself enough that his thoughts started to slow down until almost no thought entered his head. Only a pleasant feeling of wooziness started to overtake him. A warm gray like his dream overtook his mind until he was floating in it.

Raito had no idea how long he took or how long he relaxed in the gray area, soon though he started to once again hear the world around him. The humming of the computers and modems and the soft clanking of fingers on keys, the ticking of a clock that was stationed on the wall, it was all coming back to his ears, abide slowly.

His mind also started to wake up from the hazy state, as soon as his mind started to register sound his mind connected back up. He didn't know if it had worked or not. The only way to be sure of that would be to open up his eyes and see for himself.

Slowly opening his eyes so that the light wouldn't sting them for being closed for a while he squinted in the sudden bright light that hit his vision.

Shifting his body a bit he looked around, a smile took over his face as everything had a reddish haze to it. It seemed that his little plan had worked. Now he wouldn't have to go to sleep or be knocked out anymore. With more practice he was even sure he would be able to leave his body within seconds. Looking at the clock he was surprised to see that two hours had passed by. Longer then he would have hoped but not as bad as he had feared.

"How does Raito-kun feel now? Do you still feel out of sorts?"

Raito turned his head to look at L, it seemed that Watari must have been here because L now had a slice of triple layer chocolate cake in one hand and a fork in the other. It was already halfway eaten so Raito deducted Watari had only just left.

Taking L's question in consideration Raito thought about it. How did he feel? Well one thing was for sure…the weird feeling he had before seemed to have amplified itself twice over. It was no longer a gut feeling of uneasiness but a burning buzzing in his head.

"I still feel odd and it's much worse then it was before. It's like I have a nest of angry bees in my head."

Raito was confused, what was wrong? Maybe he should consult Zaki about it. He didn't want anything really terrible to be wrong and if he left it as it was it might have the opportunity to get worse.

L's whole demeanor showed concern. Work forgotten he got out of his chair and walked towards his shinigami lover.

Raito stood there in frustration, the buzzing was getting worse the longer he stood there. He stretched out his wings letting them touch the wall and ceiling beside him. He missed L's gaze of admiration as he stared at Raito's wings.

"I don't know what's wrong L, let me try something first."

With that said Raito closed his eyes and mentally called out to his lifenote.

'Zaki? Hey Zaki you awake? I need your help…Zaki?...hello?....ZAKI!!'

Raito wasn't panicking, at least not yet, usually he would have been able to feel his friend even if he was asleep, and Zaki had always answered him when he called, especially if Raito was asking for help. But for some reason the place in his mind that Zaki had encompassed was…empty.

'That doesn't make any sense! Why the hell isn't he answering?!'

Raito opened his eyes and reached to his belt, maybe if he was holding his lifenote in his hands Zaki would be able to answer him.

Raito froze.

'Wait-what?!'

The book chain that had comfortably sat around his waist…the place where the lifenote resided in…was completely empty.

"No freaking way…"

Raito was beginning to feel very afraid at this point, and as if things couldn't get any worse the buzzing intensified to the degree that he was starting to see swarming black spots in his vision, a loud ringing sound began to drill into his ears and his body suddenly began to get very heavy like gravity was pushing on him full force.

"Raito-kun you've suddenly become very pale, is everything alright? What's wrong? Raito-kun? RAITO-KUN!!"

Sudden darkness overtook him completely and Raito knew no more.

---

Short I know but I wanted to get this done quickly, besides the last chapter (cough-lemon-cough) was quite long. Besides it was just too great an ending to pass up.

Oh dear…it seems that Raito has become aware of the missing notebook, what will he do now and how will he find it?

Hehe you'll just have to wait to find out. I've actually got that all planned out…and I'm positively giddy about it. ME GIDDY. That is so wrong on so many levels.

I'm suppose to hate this story but…I can feel my old love for this story coming back. It's just too fun now (or that could be the energy drink I just had) I like making things difficult for the two lovebirds. It wouldn't be a good fic without some 'OhMyGodWhatsGoingToHappenNext!' ness.

Ah…me happy. I finished this chapter in an HOUR! Yes…I'm getting Twilight Zone vibes too you're not alone.

Reviews make me even giddier so if you want me to stay giddy I implore you to push the greenish button on the bottom of this page and leave a word or two or ten or hundred. It's all good! XD


	25. Chapter 25

Oh look…another update, what's the world coming too nowadays I ask?

(Sigh) I haven't gotten many reviews lately…a lot of hits but few reviews…why is that I wonder? I'm updating like mad instead of waiting two to three months between updates…I don't know I think I may have lost a lot of my faithful reviews because of my lack of getting a beta. Maybe I should really stop procrastinating that and just get one already (because God knows I need one!)

But I did hit 500 reviews!! YA! So I'm happy about that at least.

Now let's see…hmmm my new goal is too…reach 600 by chapter 35!!! YES IT WILL BE DONE OR MY NAME ISN'T…mumble-mumble

Oh well here's another update. Short again but darn it it's an update!!

---

'Argh…what hit me and did anyone get the license plate?'

Raito woke up to a throbbing and pounding headache. Keeping his eyes tightly shut he tried to remember what had happened. But his head hurt too much for him to think clearly.

Suddenly a voice spoke from near his head.

"Is your head still hurting Raito?"

Raito instantly regretted opening his eyes, the light that shined in the room around him stung his eyes causing them to instantly tear up.

Ignoring the tears that ran down his face he turned his head to where he had heard the voice. Opening his eyes he was able to see a blurry outline hovering over him.

"L-kun?"

Raito heard someone sigh in obvious relief. His guess was that it was L because he had been able to feel the warm exhaled air hit him.

"Yes Raito-kun it's me, can you see alright? You're eyes are watering."

"Umm kind of, the light right now is really bright."

Raito saw the blur get up from the chair and move to the far wall. A second later blissful darkness overtook the room. His eyes stopped tearing up as they relaxed from the constant strain of trying to see in the light.

"Thanks L."

"Your welcome, I believe the reason why you are having such a hard time seeing right now is because when you fell earlier you had banged your head on the floor quite hard. I'm sorry that I wasn't fast enough to catch you."

"T-that's ok L, it wasn't your fault…but does that mean I passed out while I was in Shinigami form?"

"Yes, after you had left your body and taken this form I can only imagine a great pain had overtaken you and it overloaded your brain causing you to faint."

"I don't faint L."

"Sorry…_you fell over and passed out_."

"That's my story and I'm sticking too it."

"Ha ha Raito-kun very funny."

"I like to think so."

"So I'm guessing from your sarcasm level that you are feeling better?"

Raito paused as his next sarcastic comment died on his lips, while bantering with L he had forgotten for a moment why he was even lying here. How did he feel?

"Well let's take stock shall we? Hmm…well my head feels like it's been battered with a steel rod until my brains became pea soup, my eyes while better in the dark still sting like a wasp has gotten aggressive on me. Let's see…I must still be in my shinigami form because I can feel my wings getting smashed because I'm lying on top of them. Other then that…I'm feeling one hundred and ten percent like shit."

Silence descended after Raito spoke.

Then…

"Well I'm glad you're feeling better Raito-kun, Watari will be bringing you in some soup to eat and then we are going to commence operation: Find Raito's Notebook."

Raito chocked on nothing as he stared at the poker face that L was sporting, but Raito was still able to make out a glimmer of humor in his eyes.

"L…who the hell said that you can try sarcasm? And how did you know my LifeNote's missing?"

L let out a sigh as if to say that he thought Raito must have lost some precious brain cells in his earlier fall. It somewhat disturbed Raito that he was able to tell that from just one sigh.

"It was easy Raito-kun to figure out that the notebook is missing, you had paled and fainted after touching your hip where I know your notebook is supposed to be housed. After you fainted_-yes you fainted Raito get over it-_I carried you back to our room while Watari carried your other body back here as well. I checked to see if the note was there and after seeing that it wasn't I deducted that it must have gone missing or perhaps been stolen and that is the reason why you got ill and aren't feeling good. It is plain to see that you can not be separated from your Lifenote without serious repercussions happening, there is also the possibility that you can get worse the longer you are without its presence. I'm not sure when it was taken…it must have happened right after we arrived here, but I can't figure out how that could have happened…Raito-kun's note is always on his shinigami form and I'm pretty sure you haven't taken it out since we were at your house. So how could it have gone missing? That's the only thing I can't figure out, but that will have to wait until after we find it first."

Raito sat there speechless, his jaw slightly hanging and his eyes slightly glazed.

"I take from your lack of response that you agree with me. Good then it will save us time; I will ask that you stay in your shinigami form for now. It might prove useful for us in locating the lost note. I know that whatever ill feelings you have at the moment are amplified by being in this form but I ask you to please bare it until you can no longer. Now I believe that Watari will be here any minute with the soup, I don't know if you can consume human substances in that form but I do recall you telling me about a shinigami that loved to eat apples so I'm guessing that it will be alright, the soup will help with your headache hopefully."

"O-Okay"

Raito was feeling just a little bit overwhelmed, it had been a while since L had gotten all control detective on him, not that he minded, oh no it just was a little unexpected. Truthfully he shouldn't have been so surprised, this was L he was talking about after all.

Raito turned his head to look on the other side of the bed, his unconscious body was lying beside him. Sometimes it gave him the creeps to see himself like that, he couldn't help but feel that whenever he wasn't in his body it began to look like a corpse.

"No you don't Raito-kun, if anything it reminds me of the fairy tale Sleeping Beauty or Snow White, yes a beautiful princess sleeping peacefully waiting for true loves first kiss to awaken them."

Raito blushed as he realized that he had voiced his inner thoughts out loud, then turned even redder as what L just said processed in his head.

"Sleeping Beauty and Snow White L? If I remember correctly both of those sleeping beings were maidens and they had both been in a death like trance not sleeping."

L shrugged.

"Is there a difference Raito-kun? Some say that sleeping is just another form of death."

Raito let out a sigh, before he could continue the pointless debate the door of their suite opened to show Watari with a tray laded with a bowl of steaming soup and a bowl of fruit.

"Ah I'm glad you've awoken Raito-san, I was just starting to worry. Of course I wasn't panicking quite yet like young L here was. You should have seen it my boy, I never thought I would see the day when L babbled like a three year old."

"_Watari!"_

"Now there's no reason to be embarrassed by it L, if it had been under different circumstances it would have been adorable, but unfortunately it did nothing but hinder me in inspecting young Raito-san. My boy I had to lock the hysterical child outside the room!"

"I was not hysterical! - nor am I a child!"

Raito was staring back and forth between the two men, a laugh was bubbling in his gut but he had the hindsight to suppress it. L looked really upset by Watari's teasing and Raito didn't want to upset him even more by yelling at the poor man.

After a few more minutes of listening though he couldn't help the small chuckle that escaped from his lips.

He winched a bit as L spun around to face him with a hurt expression on his face. Watari was smart enough to put down the tray and back out of the room quickly but not before giving Raito an encouraging look that did nothing but make him feel worse. Like he needed encouragement to deal with a misunderstanding.

Well ok maybe he did if he had to go by the look that L was currently sending him.

Raising his hands in the universal sign of "I surrender" Raito hurriedly spoke before L had a chance too.

"Look L I wasn't laughing at what you did, in fact I find it impossibly sexy and cute at the same time, I was just laughing at the situation. I mean here I am sitting on our bed with my body not two inches from me while you and Watari argue childishly in front of me. It just struck me as ironically funny that's all."

L stared blankly at him for a few more minutes causing Raito to start to sweat in nervousness. He wasn't really that upset was he? Shit if he was…Raito might just be sleeping on the floor for who knows how long.

L watches me sweat for a few minutes more, by this time my face had twisted into a grimace and I had started to fidget as well. Finally L seemed to come to the conclusion that I was telling the truth and ended my suffering.

"Alright Raito-kun I believe you…this time."

"R-Right umm…so about this plan to find my notebook?"

L seemed to ponder for a moment before shaking his head.

"Not right now Raito-kun, I can tell that your headache is still bothering you so please eat your soup first while I think on it a while more."

Grimacing Raito did as L told him too, only because he could tell that he wouldn't budge from his decision of waiting till Raito ate before talking to him again.

While Raito spooned up the warm creamy soup he watched L reach over to the fruit bowl that Watari had brought in and take a peach out. The fuzzy pink round fruit looked odd as L held it between two fingers.

As Raito brought the soup filled spoon to his mouth he almost dropped it as he watched L bite down into the soft flesh of the peach. Juice flowed down his chin as he ate. As he licked and nibbled at the juicy flesh, his long agile pink tongue peaked out of his mouth to gather the flowing juice that dared escape his mouth.

Soup now forgotten Raito continued to bluntly stare at the unintentionally erotic scene that L was presenting him.

Finally L seemed to notice that he had an audience because he turned his eyes towards the slightly drooling sight on the bed.

"Are you alright Raito-kun? You seem a bit…out of it."

Raito awoke with a start from his erotic day-dream that he had been thinking about for the pass few minutes.

'God…L really has no idea how utterly sexy he is when he's eating, and added with what we did the night before…_god_ _I'm horny right now_…I wonder if I can have sex in this form?'

"Um I'm fine L just thinking about things."

"Oh? What kind of things?"

"You know…things."

"…how eloquent put Raito-kun."

"Shut it L or this hot soup is going to end up in your lap."

"Touché"

Silence descended them once again for all of ten seconds.

"So…would these things you are thinking about involve a large amount of drooling? Because from what I see Raito-kun's either lost feeling in his jaw or he was thinking naughty thoughts."

"_L Lawliet!"_

"Ah so it was the naughty thoughts then."

"Just shut up will you!"

"But Raito-kun we are a couple aren't we? And from what I understand honesty is the best trait in a healthy couple, so isn't it correct that we share what we are thinking about to each other? That includes all naughty thoughts."

"L-you-are-pushing-it"

L was clearly ignoring him as he continued with his utter bullshit.

"-I mean if Raito's having such naughty thoughts it's only right and fair that he would share those thoughts with his significant other don't you agree? To not do so would be considered an act of betrayal to the other member of this relationship, to hold back is a sign of an unhealthy part of our coupleization-"

"Is that even a word?"

"_So _in conclusion Raito-kun because you seem not to want a healthy interaction between us I am forced to take drastic measures."

"…and those are?"

"Patience is a virtue Raito-kun one that I find I have plenty of."

Raito huffed and decided that L was just sprouting his usual bullshit and didn't have anything planned.

'And what utter bullshit it is…I mean was he just pulling that speech out of his ass or something? Unhealthy relationship?! Just because I didn't want to tell him about the darn fantasy I had?! I mean come on it's the guy's freaking fault in the first place! If he didn't fucking tease me with the fruit…wait a minute that's it! He knew what the hell he was doing! The bastard!! Oh I'll get back at him for this-wait maybe that's what he wants? For me to be the first to crack? Well he has another thing coming if he thinks that he can get me to bend first. We'll see who's made of sterner stuff now _Lawliet_.'

"Do you feel cold all of a sudden Raito? The room seems to have suddenly dropped several degrees in temperature."

"_No L"_

"Oh then I just have to ask Watari to stop fiddling with the temperature in here."

"_Fine L"_

"…is Raito-kun mad at me or something?"

"Now whatever gave you that idea?"

"You're grinding your teeth and glaring at me behind your long bangs kind of clued me in."

"You knew"

"Excuse me?"

"I said you knew! You knew what you were doing! Eating that fucking fruit like that!"

"Like what Raito-kun?"

"Like it was for a fucking porn video L! Licking and sucking on it like that! Do you have any decency?!"

"So…Raito's saying that I turned him on by eating a piece of fruit?"

"If you had just been eating it I wouldn't have had this problem, but nooo you were freaking molesting it!"

"Molesting Raito-kun? What a wonderful idea."

"YES MOLESTING YOU-wait what-memp!"

Raito was unable to continue his ranting as a pair of lips descending onto his with brutal force.

After a few minutes of all most violent kissing, the fierce kiss began to change into more of a softer kind of exchange. Lips and tongues slip against each other slowly, savoring each touch and taste.

Finally they broke away from each other at the same time to get in much needed air.

"…so L…I'm guessing you had that all planned out didn't you."

"Of course Raito-kun, I wouldn't be me if I didn't have some sort of scheme in the mix, harmless though it was."

"…you are a bastard you know that right?"

"I never pretended otherwise Raito-kun, just like I know Raito-kun's a wiseass most of the time."

"I am not a wiseass!!"

"Ah ah Raito-kun, didn't we already have this speech about honesty? Do you need to have it be repeated?"

"…you suck."

"Not yet Raito-kun, not yet."

Luckily for L who Raito had just been about to strangle Watari decided to choose that moment to come back in to clean up their dishes.

"Ah here we go then, well I had hoped that you would have eaten a bit more Raito-san but I guess you might still be feeling a bit nauseous still so I'll let it go for now. Now from what I gathered you have lost something precious to you?"

"Yes I lost my-"

Stopping mid sentence Raito realized something very important. So important that he wanted to hit himself for not noticing it sooner.

'Wait a minute…I don't remember telling Watari about myself or the lifenote…and he is able to see my shinigami form…_how_? This isn't making sense unless…he touched my Lifenote?! But how?!? I only just lost it! He wouldn't have had time to touch it unless…'

"Umm Watari? I'm guessing L told you about myself, I mean why there seems to be two of me and that one of them has wings and all that."

Watari nodded.

"Yes it came to quite a shock for myself to come into your office to a hysterical L and two unconscious men, one of course was you-_or your body at least-_ and the other one not quite human. But L quickly gave a brief explanation for me before we moved you here."

"Oh okay then…umm this might seem an out of there question but…have you come in contact with a white covered notebook?"

Watari sat straight in the hard chair he had dragged over from the other side of the room so he could sit near the bed while they communicate without him having to stand the entire time.

"Why yes I have, just the other morning in fact. The morning after you boys arrived and went to work in the other room I had went out and as you can see got you a few things in preparation that we might be here a while. Because there were a few more bags then I had anticipated I had commandeered a young man's help with carrying the bags up here. We set them down but before I could pay him the amount I had offered he had spotted this little notebook half hidden under the bed. He seemed fascinated by it and asked to have that as payment instead. Because I know how many notebooks L has and because this one seemed almost brand new I of course gave it too him."

'Oh fuck no'

Raito had a very bad feeling about all this…

"Watari…do you remember the man's name by chance?"

Watari seemed to think about it for a second, he didn't seem to notice the tense expressions on his young chargers faces.

"Now what was it…Mamoru? No…Mike? Wait no that wasn't it either, oh I remember now! It was Mikami!"

The day which had started bad and had just keep descending suddenly seemed as dark as night.

"Shit…"

'This day couldn't get any worse.'

Just then a phone rang shrilly causing all of them to jump up in surprise except for Watari. It didn't seem that Watari had realized what he had done, more then likely because L hadn't yet told him about the LifeNote.

Raito looked over at L as the man dug into his huge pockets to try to find the still ringing cell-phone.

After a few more seconds of having to listen to the shrill noise L made a victory sound and pulled out a slim phone from his pocket. He frowned as he looked at the caller id. It was clear that he didn't know the number but he still flipped it opened and held the phone in his weird two finger way to his head.

"Moshi Moshi"

L was silent as he listened to whatever the person on the other side of the phone had to say.

"…I understand"

L flipped the phone shut, a tense pinched look on his face as he looked into Raito's and Watari's concerned faces.

It seemed that L was having a hard time trying to get out what he wanted to say.

Finally he just let out a heavy sigh and closed his eyes, you could visibly see his shoulders drop.

"I just had a very insightful conversation with…Kira."

"…Fucking shit!"

"My thoughts exactly."

---

Aww can't I give these poor boys a break already?

I guess not, still I have to say that I'm surprised by how this is going. This was not what I had planned out. The notebook was supposed to be stolen by a street rat kid that Watari had paid to help with the luggage. It was going to be a wild goose chase and nothing bad or important was going to happen.

But noooo I just had to make it plot related!

Darn you Kira! You are screwing everything up!! ARGH!!

…ok I better now, wow who thought screaming would release so much tension?

So now I must change my plot (ONCE AGAIN!) because I hadn't planned on Kira appearing so soon. The next few chapters like I was saying were suppose to be filler-fun chapters but it looks like we're back to plot fun now. I'm not sure how much longer this story will be, I feel I'm getting closer to the end…oh no.

PLEASE REVIEW! PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE!!! I'm updating so much faster! I need more please!

Give me love and I will shower you with wonderful plot twists and utter wonderousness!


	26. Chapter 26

I've finally gotten a Beta. I know (ohmygodfinally!) Give a round of applause to **VirtualDraconium**! The thing is though she is betaing only my older chapters! So…unfortunately any future chapters I write at the moment will still be unbetaed. Sorry!

But hey at least all those older chapters that everyone was complaining about will get a face lifted! Heh

I've only received the first three chapters back from her and have posted them, they are much cleaner and easier to read now! YA! I can't wait for the rest of the chapters!

But-rereading my old chapters makes me want to rewrite everything, I mean darn what was I on when I wrote those chapters?! They were so…bleh!

Anyway I want to thank everyone who reviewed and also those who offered themselves as my betas, it was really very hard to pick someone but I decided on VirtualDraconium for a number of reasons. One-she's betaed before (she's the beta for **Dragonrider4000**!) Two-She has a lot of free time apparently and Three-She's lives in the United Kingdom!

I was going to get one of my RL friends to beta for me but-One-she has a full time job right now, Two-She will be starting a new semester of school with me so I know she wouldn't really have time to beta and do homework, Three-umm there's really no three. So I just want to say…Sorry Blood-Red-Dragon (aka the person who's going to tan my hide!) I Luvs you!!! (hands over a Near plush) Look! It's a mini-you! Hehe

…I'm going to burn.

Anyway enjoy!

---

"What I want to know before trying to figure out how the hell Mikami got into our room and took the LifeNote is…how the hell did he get your cell-phone number?!"

L seemed nonchalant about all this but Raito could tell it was deeply affecting him with how they had been once again been easily found. L prided himself on his ability to stay hidden from the public view, so to be easily found not once but twice was more then enough to cause the usual level-headed man to lose composure.

He was chewing on his thumb with frustration with just about enough pressure to break the skin. Raito wanted to reach over and pull the poor abused piece of flesh from L's unforgiving mouth but he knew that with L in this kind of mood his own fingers might become victims instead. So he held his peace and just continued to keep an eye out in case he had to ask Watari for the first-aid kit.

"Good question Raito-kun."

"L who else had your cell-phone number?"

"Just you and Watari and the rest of the task force. The task force was directly told to only use it in a life-or-death situation and to never give it away to another person."

"…you even gave it to Matsuda?"

The wide eye stare that L gave Raito said it all.

"…ah shit."

"Yep, hey Watari if you would can you please contact Matsuda and see if he had accidently or purposely gave away L's cell-phone number to anyone, I wouldn't be surprised if he had done it purposely after what L did to him."

"I said I was sorry!"

"No you didn't and it's not me you should be apologizing too."

"Well excuse me that I haven't really had time to track down a moron and apologize to him for trying to kill my father figure and my lover!"

"It was an accident."

"I know!... I know that and I admit I may have gone overboard a little."

"Just a little?"

"Ok a lot! Happy now?!"

"Ecstatic."

L just huffed and crossed his arms.

'Is he pouting? Oh my…he is! Aww he has no idea how adorable that is. I better not tell him that though, knowing him he'd never do it again if I tell him that.'

"So L…when are you going to tell me what Mikami told you on the phone?"

L looked hesitant as if he didn't want to say anything but knew that he needed too.

"Well Raito-kun from what I gathered in that phone call it would seem that Mikami believes that I am Kira."

Raito felt stunned, he hadn't even thought of that possible conclusion.

"Wait-what!?"

Before Raito could continue with his disbelieving stupor the door opened to a huffing Watari, it looked like he had run back from where he had made the phone call. Watari seemed to have lost all composure, he started to stutter and diverted his eyes from the two young men in front of him.

"I'm so sorry, I had no idea I-"

"Watari please stop and tell us what's going on."

Watari seemed to compose himself after L spoke.

"Well after the New Kira got our old location we were in such a panic that we didn't really inform the rest of the team of the situation that well. I mean we gave them the basics but basically all we did was tell them to go home. That includes Misa."

Raito suddenly felt himself go pale.

"Oh shit…I had forgotten about her."

He could tell that L was also kicking himself in the head. They had been so involved with what had been happening between them that they had honestly forgotten about the second Kira.

"Yes I also had indeed forgotten about the young women as well. It seems that she had gone back to her apartment while being very upset and angry. It seemed that she was worried about where you were Raito-san. So much in fact that she hunted down the rest of the investigation team, it seems that she wanted to find out were we were hiding. I had not informed young Amane-san of danger we were in. I believe that she was left with the impression that we had kidnapped you. The rest of the team wouldn't give her your number you had left them with…but Matsuda…"

"Let me guess Watari-she charmed him up."

"I believe that's the jest of it. It seems that Amane-san had come crying to him about how Raito-san was missing and that she was going to kill herself if she didn't see you soon. It seemed that he was too afraid to tell her about what he had done so instead he had given her your number. I'm also sad to say that he had also told her about your relationship. She was-well let's just say that it was good that Matsuda saw the danger he was in and ran for it or we would be one investigator short."

"After that she went missing, I've called the rest of the team to search for her but we haven't been able to come up with any leads. The last place she was seen was somewhere around this area by one of her fans. I believe…about two miles out."

Raito felt his inside freeze. If Misa knew about the two of them her psychotic love for him could well turn deadly even without the Deathnote power.

L seemed deep in thought, when a thought came to Raito.

"Watari-san I don't doubt that you are very careful about L's secrecy but it still confuses me…why did you give Mikami the notebook? Surly you saw that it had been written in?"

Watari looked confused.

"Of course I looked inside. I wouldn't be that careless. I know that L has a habit of writing important information down when he is thinking. But when I picked up the notebook it was totally blank."

"The cover as well as the inside? Nothing at all was written in it?"

"The cover was just plain white without any distinguish features. I made sure to look carefully through it before I handed it over. There wasn't anything inside, it was a completely brand new unused notebook."

"That's not possible."

"I agree with Raito-kun, Watari I know that there is no way that the notebook was empty. I had seen with my own eyes that there was blood in that book."

"B-Blood?! Why on earth-?!"

So while L was calmly explaining the existence LifeNote and its importance to Watari Raito started to brainstorm.

'Why would the Lifenote be empty? And for that matter what happened to the rules and the names?'

Raito leaned his back on the headboard as L's soft voice smoothed his chaotic thoughts, letting his mind clear up and for his logical calculated mind to take over.

'Hmm…maybe-just maybe Zaki had something to do with that. I'm still not sure how the lifenote ended up on the floor when it should have still been with my shinigami form but maybe Zaki was able to feel someone other then me or L touch the notebook. In that case he might have felt the need to hide what the Lifenote really was. If that's the case then Mikami might still believe that the LifeNote is still a normal notebook. Hmmm…that's the only possibility that I can think of that sounds logical. But still the real question right now is why does Mikami think L is Kira?'

Raito pondered this for a while as the soft sounds of conversation washed over him.

What also worried him was if Misa had gotten in contact with Mikami then that would mean that she more then likely had her memoires back of being the second Kira, and if the shinigami that was haunting this new Kira was Rem…well then he might just be in a spot of trouble.

'I wonder how Ryuk is doing? That bastard probably is hiding out in the shinigami world-'

Sudden a thought hit him.

"Shit!"

He could tell that his loud exclamation startled the hell out of the other two in the room but he didn't care, he was to busy hitting himself in the head.

"How the hell could I have forgotten about that!?"

"Would Raito-kun like to share with the rest of the class just what it was that he had forgotten?"

Raito sent a half-hearted glare in L's direction but he was already moving.

"L we need to go and get something."

"Leave Raito-kun? I don't think that's very safe at the moment, now that Mikami knows were we live I don't think it would be safe to step outside at all."

"That's the thing L-I don't think Mikami knows that it's us. I mean Watari said the notebook was empty right? Then how would he know that that notebook was special? That's right-he didn't. He more then likely thinks that it was just a normal notebook and even if he suspects that there might just be something paranormal about it he doesn't have any proof because the notebook at the moment is just that a notebook. And remember-Watari just happened to ask Mikami to help him. It wasn't like he could have planned it or anything. This inn is close to were he is probably living remember-he probably frequents this area a lot. So it was just chance that he was here."

The thoughtful expression on L's face showed that he was contemplating what Raito was saying, Raito knew that he would agree with him in the end. Everything that Raito had said made absolute sense.

After a few minutes L seemed to come to some conclusion because he nodded his head in an absent minded way while softly nibbling on his thumb, no longer was he biting hard enough to draw blood.

"Ok Raito-kun, I can see how you came to that conclusion and I have to agree with you. Mikami only saw Watari, an elderly gentleman. He shouldn't have suspected that we were here as well. Though it chills me to think that while we were in the office room he was only a down the hall."

That also chilled Raito but he didn't show it. It made him wonder though, he hadn't seen any shinigami around so that meant that when Mikami was here he hadn't been tailed with a shinigami. Did that mean he was no longer the owner of the Deathnote? Or was someone else the owner? If Mikami was a puppet and lackey of someone else that person would have to be very smart and devious.

As Raito stared into thoughtful eyes he remembered what he had been going to tell L beforehand.

"L there is a reason why we need to go somewhere. The deathnote that this New Kira has is the second Kira's notebook if it really is Rem that is hunting him. Remember there are two of them in the world right now, possibly more if we want to think worse case scenario, but did you ever wonder where I put my deathnote?"

Raito could tell that L was stunned into silence by the expression on his face, more then likely kicking himself in the head for not thinking about that.

"I regret to say Raito-kun that that thought hadn't occurred to me. I had forgotten that you had a deathnote as well as your Lifenote."

Raito could understand, to L this was the first time dealing with supernatural aspects and because Raito hadn't been Kira for a while it was hard to associate him with a deathnote. Now that he was the complete opposite of it at least.

"That's ok, I had forgotten about it as well. I buried it under a tree in a park near where I live. Originally Misa was going to find it and continue her actions as the second Kira."

"-and then I would suspect her once again of being the second Kira once more and start to monitor her once more causing Rem to kill me am I right Raito-kun?"

Raito flinched.

"Ah yes-but-"

Raito was startled as L began to chuckle.

"Don't worry Raito-kun, I have to say that it was a brilliant plan and would have of course worked, it did once after all."

Raito nodded and quickly changed the subject, talking about how he had once planned-and succeeded-to kill L made him feel terrible.

"So before we deal with Mikami and Misa let's hurry and claim ownership of that deathnote before Rem remembered about it and tells Misa."

L nodded before leaping out of his chair, he paused and looked at Raito.

"Will your body be alright if we leave it here for a while?"

Raito nodded.

"It should be okay. I think it's kinda like I'm sleeping. As long as no one tries to wake my body up I should be okay."

"Then would it be okay if you stay in your shinigami form for a while. We might just need that advantage."

"Yea I was already going too anyway."

L walked towards the bed, as Raito watched L tucked in his body and made sure it was comfortable. It was sweet how caring L acted at times.

Watari had already left to prepare the car for the short drive that would take them to the resting place of the DeathNote.

Raito floated behind L as they descending the stairs, L had made sure that the room that Raito's human body was resting in was tripled locked before he would leave.

Pushing a strange of long rust colored hair from his face Raito looked down at the hunched form below him. L amazed him at times, no not at times. All the time really. Raito was in an internal debate at the moment, he himself didn't want to become the owner of the deathnote mostly because he was afraid he might just be tempted to use it, which would result in his death. But he also didn't want L to become the owner, he didn't want L subjected to the pull of the Deathnote. He knew L was strong and would be able to resist it but-it was hard.

One of them had to become the new owner of the deathnote, but no matter who became the owner the other person was sure to suffer as well.

Raito let out a sigh of frustration and weariness, it seemed that no matter what he did things just kept getting more and more complicated.

The bad feeling had subdued a bit, enough that he was able to focus. It was still there buzzing though in the back of his head. Like a constant reminder. He hoped that Zaki was doing ok, as long as he kept his head down so to speak the LifeNote shouldn't be a problem.

---

Wow yet another very short chapter, but you know what? I don't really care. XP

I had honestly forgotten about the buried notebook, I hope I haven't mentioned it in previous chapters, also Misa. I had forgotten about her as well. I mean it's ok if I forget but to have L and Raito forget? That's just bad!

Well I'm back in school now so I'm not sure if chapters will be speeding up or slowing back down again. It depends on how hard the classes are.

Also I've got a VERY important poll up on my author's page. Please go there and vote! It is very important to this fanfiction.

I'm also writing my own book now! YES! Hehe I want to have it finished by 2012 so I can have it published before the world ends. XP

I have to admit this story kind of inspired my book, at least the sequel of the book I have planned, hehe I have to have the first book written first before anyone can come back to life to fix the world, they need to ruin it first.

I've only written the prologue and half of the first chapter but I like were it is going at least. The main character has characteristics of both L and Raito, not a lot that it would be called plagiarism though.

Anyway back to important matters-REVIEW PLEASE!! I need them so much.


	27. Chapter 27

I'm so sorry that it's been so long since my last update! I just… kind of lost interest in DeathNote for a while. I know… it should be a crime.

I'm writing like four other different fanfictions in different categories. Not going to post them yet, at least not until they are almost if not completely finished.

Oh on another note… Fan_Fiction_Lover… Please give me your e-mail address! I can't answer your questions unless you are logged in. Either that or PM me. At anytime. Thank you so much for your inspiring and very flattering review (seriously people thank this person for without this review I would have not updated) I did mention Mpreg(I love good mpregs) and might be doing it in the sequel to this story. Depends on how this one ends really. XD

---

Watari parked the car near the area that Raito had hid the Deathnote. Following the young man's directions the elder had driven without question.

Raito couldn't tell what Watari was thinking at the moment, after he had placed the car in park he had pulled out a worn book out of the glove box and proceed to read without acknowledging either L or Raito.

Raito let out another weary sigh as he turned his head to look at the tense figure that sat beside him.

Raito knew L was having an internal debate about what they were about to do, fact was he himself wanted to have an internal debate, sadly though he knew that it wouldn't do much good.

Raito didn't even have to guess on why L would be having this silent moment to himself.

Raito knew that L had already decided for himself to become the new owner of the Deathnote that Raito had buried all those weeks ago.

It was odd-it seemed that what he had done had happened eons ago when in fact in reality it had only been a short time since he had physically been Kira.

At least to the rest of the world, including a young black raven of a man.

Raito knew even if he were to argue with L until both of them were red in the face it wouldn't matter. Once L made up his mind he went through with it one hundred and twenty percent.

He could hear Watari in the front seat of the car, quietly humming to himself, as he read, looking like he had all the time in the world to wait on them.

Finally after ten minutes of silence Raito leaned over and mumbled into a pale ear.

"L we need to go."

It took L about eight seconds to respond and that was only with a tight nod. Raito sighed and floated out of the car with L quickly behind him.

Leading the way Raito navigated through the thick forage around them, the area of the small park he had chosen before had been largely neglected, which was one of the reasons he had chosen that location in the first place. Hardly anyone went this way and Raito had taken advantage of that.

Raito decided to walk beside L instead of flying, though if he was honest with himself it was more like floating then flying.

Walking through the dense forage Raito sent frequent worried glances to L, who seemed not to notice them at all as L continued to walk forward. He had come prepared for the outdoors, he was even wearing shoes.

Though it had to be noted that he wasn't wearing socks and the shoe laces were untied.

Raito wasn't fooled by L's seemingly indifference; he knew that L had noticed the frequent glances that he had been sending in his direction. It showed how much L didn't want any kind of mêlée with him that he was ignoring Raito's subtle hints at conversation.

Raito finally took notice of how close they were to where he had buried the deathnote. He frowned he wasn't look forward to this at all, not with dealing with Ryuk or the deathnote. Both of those things had brought him nothing but bad luck and made his blood pressure go through the roof.

It made him morbidly wonder if he would have had a natural heart attack if Ryuk hadn't of killed him off first the first time around.

Speaking of Ryuk…oh did Raito really want to hurt him, now that he'd had time to think about it he wanted to bang his head in a wall. He had finally remembered… one of the most important rules in the Deathnote … that very important rule stated that you couldn't use the deathnote to make someone kill someone else.

Ryuk had bluffed him. HIM.

And won. That miserable bastard.

Oh it didn't stop the man from coming into his family's house or anything, but Raito would bet the moment the man caught sight of his family he would have died from a heart attack. Because under that rule he couldn't kill the Yagami family. He would have died before even touching them.

Raito had fallen into Ryuk's cleaver little prank, he had panicked. Something very much unlike him and Ryuk used that to his advantage. Raito would make sure to make Ryuk's life very unpleasant when he saw him.

Absolutely No Apples!

It might be a bit petty of him but Raito didn't care, he wanted Ryuk to suffer. He knew that L would agree with him so he didn't have to worry about Ryuk convincing L that he needed apples.

Finally Raito spotted the tree that marked where he had buried the deathnote. Signaling to L that they were at the right place he walked over to the tree.

"So Raito-kun, I suspect that the DeathNote is buried beneath this tree?"

Raito nodded and that was all the confirmation that L needed to kneel on the ground and start digging with the small shovel he had carried with him. Watari had handed it to him after they had told the older man about it being buried in the ground.

Despite knowing that L had already made up his mind Raito decided to at least try to pursue him not to take ownership.

"L...Lawliet are you sure you want to do this? I mean we can find some other way so you don't have to take ownership-"

Raito was cut off before he could continue.

"Raito-kun who else would you trust with ownership of the deathnote? I myself only trust you and Watari, and for obvious reasons I don't want either of you owning the deathnote so it is left up to me. If you're worried it will corrupt me, don't. I have no plans on using the note at all at the present time."

Raito frowned. He didn't like that. What did L mean he had no plans now…?

"Present…?"

But L ignored his half whispered question as he quickly uncovered the box that held the note.

"Is this-"

"Yes."

L hummed in fascination as he picked up the dirty box out of the hole he had dug and placed it right beside him. Raito was standing right behind him so he wasn't able to see L's facial expression.

He wasn't sure he wanted to anyway.

Watching L open the box and extract the baggie that held the deathnote Raito couldn't help but feel a sense of-well something. He wasn't quite sure what it was he was feeling but whatever it was he didn't like it one bit.

L's hands seemed to be mildly shaking but in apprehension or anticipation Raito couldn't tell. Looking around he didn't spot Ryuk anywhere. He wondered if the moment though that L touched the Deathnote with his bare hands Ryuk will just plop out of the sky. It would be entertaining to see him do a face dive.

Raito decided to try one more time even knowing that it would be pointless.

"L are you su-?"

Without letting Raito finished L plucked the black notebook from it's plastic casing.

Immediately Raito felt a presence in the small clearing where they were standing. For a second he couldn't pinpoint were it was coming from but then a deep chuckling alerted him.

Looking straight up above them Raito looked into amused yellow eyes.

"Ah kukuku well this is amusing… what have you been up too Raito?"

---

Short I know. But damn…I just want to post something darn it. Next chapter will have the inevitable interaction between shinigami… with a confused L in the middle XD

Review, Review, Review… working yet? ^0^


	28. Chapter 28

I barely got a dozen reviews… what the hell?! Has my story gotten boring or something?! Have I been abandoned??

Oh woe is me…cries in corner.

I'm so sorry this is so late, finals in school is killing me, also I have a massive writer's block, aaaand I've been trying to write my own novel(woot I have three chapters-cries-…then I had to bloody erase all those chapters because I hated them!)

* * *

"Hello Ryuk"

Raito's face was twisted up into a scowl as he stared up into the laughing face of the shinigami that started this whole mess in the first place.

"Awww are you still mad Raito-o? Seriously you need to loosen up and let go of that stick up your ass."

'Says the person who had a psychotic breakdown after seeing an apple destroyed?'

"Right Ryuk I'll get right on that… about the same time you get over your love for apples."

Ryuk just laughed as he twirled around the air before coming to a sudden stop. It seems that he had just noticed L.

"Uhh… hey Raito-o? What's the panda detective doing here?"

'…Panda detective? I just might be able to forgive that idiot after all?'

"Oh I get it you're his bitch now aren't ya?"

'… I take it back.'

Raito glared at the laughing shinigami and turned his head to stare at L when he heard him muffled his own laughter.

L gave him an apology look before having his face go blank.

Ryuk had stopped laughing and was now staring down at L. It seemed that he sensed that L was about to get down to business.

"So your name is Ryuk correct?"

Ryuk just floated in the air, giving off the air of someone who didn't care what was happening in front of him. Unfortunately for him Raito and L were more observant then that. Ryuk was definitely paying attention to everything L was doing and saying.

"Yes it is, and you are L Lawliet aren't ya. Ehahaha you certainty kept Raito-boy on his toes I'll give you that."

"Thank you, now I believe I'm under the impression that you were the shinigami that first dropped the DeathNote that Raito-kun picked up."

"Right again!"

"Are you aware of the current events that are taking place?"

"Ummm well kind of, I know that Raito-boy here is no longer human, not quite sure how he managed that but if anyone could achieve that he could. I know that he has some kind of weird notebook, it isn't quite a DeathNote I can tell you that, but really other then that I don't know much…Oh I do know that Rem has become some human's pet again, hehe I'm not sure if this is a step up or a step down for her… that woman Misa was a situation of her own. Buwhahahahah!!"

To say that Raito was confused would be a massive understatement.

"Ryuk…why the hell are you being so cooperated?!"

Ryuk just sent Raito a 'Duh' look.

"Well Raito-o I'm not stupid you know."

For a second Raito almost believed him, almost.

"I mean I know that this L character is a lot richer then you are… can you imagine how many apples he could buy me in bribes?! Do you!? I mean… whole orchards…."

Raito just sent him a disbelieving look, he looked at L to see his reaction, and he was a bit surprise to see a shrewd look on his face as he gazed up to the drooling shinigami.

"Sooo…Ryuk-san, I'm wondering how much you know about this new DeathNote user of Rem's. Depending on your answer I can have…let's see… three five mile long 3 mile wide apple orchards privately bought within the hour."

A sharp look rose in Ryuk's eye as he gazed down into L's blank eyes.

"…make them Red Delicious and we have ourselves a deal."

"Agreed."

Ryuk did a little disturbing victory dance in the air that more than resembled his withdrawal symptoms.

"Right then, well I don't know quite as much as you might hope, I do know that the new Kira-wannabe is a complete nut job, even more so then Raito-o over there. I also know that he has a bunch of buddies with him that are also complete idiots. I believe that they are using a small learning area? Or something like that-"

Raito was getting frustrated; Ryuk seemed not to know anything that they didn't already know.

"-Oh I did see that the new loony Kira has a new Notebook that he's already carrying around… he seems to be obsessed with it. Enough so that he even gave that airhead Misa his Deathnote so that she could continue his killings for him since he's too busy trying to figure out that white book of his."

…wait what?!

"It is a bit different though…I mean it's not a Deathnote or anything, at least that's what I've figured out because the people whose names that he's written down aren't dying. Hehe it's funny to see him so frustrated. He doesn't know what he has either. But from what I can tell he knows it's supernatural in origin. From what I've seen while observing him from the shinigami realm is that the moment he writes a letter down it disappears from the paper. Hahah it seems that this new notebook doesn't like it's new owner…hey now that I think about it…this notebook looks a lot like that weird notebook Raito-o was carrying…hmmm…"

So many different things were whirling inside Raito's head. A dozen questions formed from what he just heard.

"Ryuk…first of all did you say that Misa was with this new Kira?"

"Yep, oh and I guess I can give you his name…for two more orchards?"

"Let me guess…his names Mikami Teru?"

Ryuk sent L a startled look of disappointment.

"Awww you already knew?! Darn it!"

L turned his head to the side in acknowledgement; his eyes were sparkling with achievement.

"Well I guess we have a hundred percent certainty that this New Kira is Mikami now, and it looks like Misa has also claimed her title of Second Kira once more."

Raito nodded in agreement.

But another question kept pestering him.

"Ryuk…how did you know what my Notebook looked like? If you saw Mikami with the notebook how did you figure out it was mine?"

For a second, it looked like Ryuk was embarrassed but it was gone in a flash.

"Oh that…well I may have split my share of spying between the new Kira and you."

"Wait you've been spying on us?! For how long?!"

"Oh since that incident with you family…this new form of yours interested me, so I've looked down on you two from time to time…heh I never really took you for the submission type Raito-o but I should have figured it out, you know with you being all girly and all."

Oh Raito was so going to kill this bastard of a shinigami if it was the last thing he did. Maybe he could disguise someone as an apple tree or something and threaten to kill it…then Ryuk would try to save it and because of his demented love for all things red and juicy he would turn into dust.

Ah such a wonderful fantasy.

"You Ryuk are one sick fuck."

"Bwhahahaah that's rich coming from you Raito-boy!"

Finally it seemed that L was growing tired from the pointless conversation and wanted to get back to business.

"So Ryuk I was wondering something, does Rem or the New Kira know of your spying on them?"

"Nope from what I can tell they are too busy having their heads shoved up their butts to pay attention. All they ever think about is killing, maiming, ruling over the world, destroying the world by using the government human's bombes against it, screwing each other…"

"Wait what was that last one?!"

"Oh the screwing each other? Well it seems that Mikami dude has some weird fetishes for Misa-"

"That's not what I meant! I meant the part about the bombes!!"

"Oh…well but that's not half as interesting as the time I spied Misa and glasses-dude trying out a new bondage lift-"

"Shut up Ryuk and tell us about the bombes!"

Ryuk just sent both of them a look of amusement, both Raito and L had equally looks of disgust and horror on their faces from the visual imagines that were running rampage in their heads. A sad drawback from having a highly intelligent, an over active mind.

"Alright you pansies, well from what I've gathered it seems that Mikami and a few selected group are planning something, most of the people at that place are just cannon fodder, you know junkies and fanatics. Useless except to use as hysteria mass. There are a group of five including glasses and Barbie doll that seem to have brains though, most of these plans sound like they would take years before they would be ready to put into action though, so no worries there. There is this one guy though, don't know what he looks like because the weirdo is always wearing this hood over his head and it covers almost all of his face. I know his name though…but I can't make things too easy on you, where would be the fun in that?! Bwhahahaahah"

Despite how much he really wanted to hurt Ryuk Raito couldn't help but feel really impressed with him as well. Right now L and him knew a lot more than they did before, and it would end up being very helpful in apprehending the New Kira and his followers.

"So what about this guy has you freaked out Ryuk?"

"Well he doesn't weird me out pre say…but some of the ideas that he has…well the way he talks makes it sound like he already knows things…things he shouldn't know. Almost like he's predicting the future or something. It's creepy and for me to say that you know I mean it!"

"Huh…"

Raito let his wings flap a bit before taking flight till he was right beside Ryuk, giving him a look before looking back at the baffled L.

It seemed that Ryuk got his meaning because he suddenly started to fly upward out of hearing range of the black haired detective.

Raito followed him, trying to ignore the startled yells of L.

When they were high enough that Raito was sure L couldn't hear him he stopped flying and turned to Ryuk.

"Ryuk I have to know truthfully how much you really now about what's going on."

Ryuk just looked at him, his fish like yellow eyes stared unblinking making Raito almost want to squirm in discomfort, almost being the world because no one ever made Yagami Raito squirm.

After a few moments Ryuk broke eye contact and let out an long drawn out sigh.

"Well Raito…I did want to draw this out a bit more but if I do I know the King will have my head."

Raito sent him a startled look.

"Wait what do you mean?"

Ryuk lifted one of his long thin arms and started to softy tug on his earring.

"Well it's like this…I didn't know much at all when I saw you earlier. I felt a bit off though…like something big happened and I had forgotten about it, it made me very irritable and annoyed so you can thank that for me acting as I did…though I might have did that regardless. Seriously you were just too funny! I mean it really was like you were worried about that family of yours!"

"Back to the point Ryuk!"

"Right right. Ok well the thing was I was confused on how you suddenly got these new powers, I mean the last time I saw you, you were a normal human, a psychotic and narcissistic human with a god complex but a human regardless. So I went back to the Shinigami realm and started to hunt for answers. You should be proud of me Raito-o, I was serious!"

"Right we can give you a pat on the back later, tell me what happened."

"Party pooper, anyway I couldn't find anything for a while, I asked around but it seemed that the other shinigami hadn't noticed a thing, they were all too stupid anyway, so I started to hunt down those of higher rank then me, and let me tell you that was not easy, not one bit! I finally found someone, I can't remember their name though…hmmm. Anyway this shinigami took me to see the King, I hadn't seen him in a long time, he had taken a different form then the last time I saw him at my birth."

"Birth?"

"Ahh…I don't think we should go into that right now Raito you already have one thing to focus on right now, best to leave that mess for another time."

"O…kay."

"Right well where was I? Oh right, well I was taken to see the King, and it was weird you know? He took me to this weird cave; it had all these scribbles on the walls. Anyway the King walked me to this pond, and told me to sit on the edge. He wouldn't tell me anything else. Only told me to sit and stare at the white water."

"Wait you said white water?"

"Yeeaaa…what about it?"

Raito shook his head as if to clear it.

"When I-when I was there the water was black."

Ryuk gave him a look as if he thought he was crazy, hell maybe he was.

"That's impossible, the water is the very essence of life itself, in all of creation, not only of earth but the universe as a whole… it can't turn black, to do so would suggest that the end of time and space had happened."

"…yea that sounds about right."

"…I think getting some has screwed with your mental status; I think you need to go cold turkey Raito."

"Oh shut up you black bean pole!"

"And you just proved my point! That was lame!"

"Oh just go fuck off and mate with a tree and have a broad of sprouts!"

"Okay that's more original."

Raito snorted and looked down, it seemed that L had gotten tired of yelling after them and had moved over to a tree to sit under, he was also studying the DeathNote with single minded determination that truthfully scared Raito.

"So Ryuk back to this white water."

"Well I sat there for who knows how long, the King had left me there and I got bored so…I touched the water."

"…"

"…"

"…you-are-an-idiot."

A snort of bemusement.

"That's nothing new."

"So you touched it, what happened."

"Well nothing at first, It felt strange though, it didn't feel like water but it looked like it, it was almost what I imagine touching cloud or fog would feel like, then all of a sudden the substance grew into something else, it became almost gooey-wait no that's not it. It was like…hmm you know that silver stuff the human use to use in those devices that told their temperatures?"

"You mean mercury?"

"Ya that's it! It felt like that. Or at least what I imagine it would feel like if I had ever touched the stuff. Anyway it suddenly turned like that and started to swerve into a whorl pool. Then…"

"Then?"

Ryuk looked at him with his strange eyes, Raito couldn't tell what expression was in them but whatever it was left him with a bad feeling.

"She came out of it."

Raito frowned.

"She?"

"Yes, she was nothing like I had ever seen, she wasn't shinigami nor was she human. She was white…so white."

Suddenly Raito knew, he knew who Ryuk saw.

"Ryuk what was she called?"

Ryuk hesitated for a second before tilting his head to look up into the sky above them.

"She called herself…Mother. Little Mother."

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Ok hows that for a chapter? I'm kind of muffled, this is almost 10 pages but it's still very short, hmm.

PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE REVIEW! I know I've been an ass with updates but this is not abandon! I need to know I haven't lost everyone who was interested in this story! Please tell me you're all still here!


	29. Chapter 29

Oh you have to admit I'm on a roll right now! Two chapters in the span of the same week?! Heeh this is my apology for neglecting this story for months at a time. Sorry.

I loved the review response! Hee I'm so happy that a lot of you are still staying strong to the story. Seriously I love you all!

I'll tell you one thing this is a dozy of a chapter. It had my head spinning…I can't wait to see what it does to everyone else.

This chapter kind of shows that I'm back into deep thinking with this story unlike the last several chapters which was basically me pulling bullshit out of my ass and passing it off like I knew what the hell I was writing.

Not any longer! ^-^

Warning: Seriously plot-twisting, mind-numbing, eye-ball-popping…ok now I'm just messing with you. Let's just say…this is a WTF! I didn't see that coming chapter!

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Raito felt his breath catch. Even though he had suspected it, it was another thing to hear it out loud.

So she was back once again, not that Raito had seen her or anything but with L seeing her in that dream and now her meeting Ryuk. It was more than slightly discomforting or a consequence, what did she want from him now? Wasn't he doing what she had asked of him? Why was she interfering? What had changed again?

So many questions were swarming in Raito's mind that he couldn't begin to sort them out enough to get them answered, plus he was pretty sure that Ryuk wouldn't have those answers anyway, not the ones he sought at least.

"So Ryuk what did she say or do after she popped out of the water."

Ryuk shrugged.

"Nothing."

Raito's face showed his lack of belief at that statement.

"Wait a second, what do you mean by nothing?!"

"Just what I said nothing, she just looked at me and shook her head, and then she left by going back in the goopy stuff."

"Wait if that's true then it wouldn't be difficult for you to explain how you know her name?"

"Oh the King came back after that, he lead me out of the cave and took me to his throne room, he then told me that what I had seen had been a Creator and her name was Little Mother, he didn't tell me that much, apparently I didn't meet the criteria of theirs, which I just want to that is bullshit."

"Anyway the King told me that you were no longer the Raito I knew from before I took your memories and that I shouldn't mess with you, that you were the chosen one or some bullshit like that, he wouldn't tell me much but what little he did tell me…well I have the feeling I should help you, for my own benefit of course, I don't want to die and I'm guessing that weird feeling I was having earlier was my impending death. And I'm much too young and pretty to die."

Raito frown but couldn't stop his eyes from betraying his amusement.

"Right of course Ryuk, anyway so do you have any other information for me?"

Ryuk's face suddenly morphed into a scarily serious expression, causing Raito to straighten up in alarm.

"Only this Raito…I don't think that the King or that little girl told you everything, I'm not stupid Raito though I might act like it most of the time, those two…I'm not sure but those two are planning something. For the better or for the worse I don't know and maybe it doesn't matter which it is, only that whatever it is I would bet my soul that it would benefit only them. You really don't know the King that well. He is very manipulative; he is after all the creator of us Shinigami, which shouldn't be possible Raito."

"I will tell you this, there are Creators and Destroyers in the world of the Gods Raito, Only Creators have the power to give life…and the Destroyers only can take life. It is a simple fact. For a Destroyer to give life to a creation…it destroys something Raito, and if somehow a Creator destroys a life. Well…whatever they told you Raito, you can be sure that it's not the total truth, if it is at all. Sometimes though the best lie is based on truth, twisted though it may be."

"For us Shinigami to be born into the world of the Shinigami realm the King must have had help, I don't know what the circumstance were or what had been promised between them but somehow the Little Mother must have given some of her power to the King to create us, I don't know for what purpose but for her to give him some of her power he must have in return given some of his power to her in exchange. That is wrong Raito, not in the sense of morally wrong but in the sense of universally wrong."

"I believe…well whatever they did was the beginning of what is happening now, oh sure you may have played a part of it Raito but don't make the mistake that you are the only co-conspirer in this little event. You may be important Raito but don't let ignorance and ego cloud your eyes. There is something bigger going on then you or I could even comprehend."

Raito felt his eyes widen to uncharacteristic proportions.

The ideas and theories that suddenly overwhelmed his mind almost caused him to physically stumble, never mind that he was in the air at the moment.

To have this information told to him, he hadn't even realized that a part of his brain had already been wondering and working on it, now hearing it for the first time out loud…it was enough for his manipulative brilliant mind to work into overdrive.

What the hell was happening? Suddenly Raito felt out of his depth, before he hadn't really, truthfully felt that worried about stopping the Death Notes or the New Kira or any of the things that had brought him here back into the past. Maybe because, he had felt that he had some mythical gods' guidance ridding on his shoulder. It was a pathetic realization that he had been small and weak enough to feel that. To feel like he was invincible and important enough that it would have been inconceivable that he would fail.

Gods…he really hadn't changed. Not really, not deep down.

Didn't he promise himself he had let go of his god complex? Now it was more of a Hercules's complex.

Damn it.

What if what Ryuk was saying was true? Raito didn't believe him completely, he was tired of believing everything that was said by strangers just because it made sense. Everything made sense…yet at the same time none of it made sense.

He wanted to believe in the Little Mother and the Shinigami King.

Raito paused, his brow started to crease in confusion and thought.

Why? Why did he want to believe in them? That didn't make sense, for Raito he had a personal habit, a trait so to speak and that was don't believe in others. Well maybe L was an exception but that was just because it was L. L was his other half so it stood to reason that he would want to believe in him. But that still didn't explain why he wanted to believe in the gods that brought him back.

Maybe that was it? Maybe it was because they had given him a second chance? But that still didn't make sense. Even then Raito should only feel gratitude to them…and suspicion.

That was it; he didn't feel the suspicion that he was suppose to be feeling. Yagami Raito had made it a rule that you should at least be suspicious at least a little bit when someone goes out of their way to help someone. Everyone wanted something and even though sending Raito back in time would save the universe and themselves it still didn't sound quite right.

They could have sent themselves back somehow, before it got bad enough. Why him? Why spend all that time while the universe folded on itself just to gather his splintered soul?

Raito shook his head; he really didn't have the time for those thoughts right now. He would analyze this at a later date, but still he couldn't help but feel mentally disturbed. It was like someone had implanted feelings of comfort and safety in his mind so deep that he didn't even question it. Which scared him shitless, because if they could do that what else did they do to him?

Raito took a deep breath and turned his mind back to the matter at hand, him questing Ryuk.

In fact there was one thing that was bugging him, something that Ryuk had said earlier.

"Wait didn't you just say that the Shinigami King didn't want you to drag this out? From what you're saying it sounds like he doesn't want you at all talking to me."

"Oh that, I didn't mean it like that. Your right he doesn't want me talking to you. Me and him never really did see eye to eye. It might have something to do with my birth. I was…somewhat wrong. A cosmic mess or something. I splintered or something like that or that's at least Roan said."

"Roan? And what do you mean you splintered?"

"Huh oh Roan's a shinigami, or at least he was once upon time, I was under his supervision. Umm the splintering, well that's complicated. There was a mistake or an interference or some bullshit like that and so when I was born I wasn't whole. I'm an anomaly in my own species Raito. Some part of my soul I guess broke off from me. I'm not sure where it went. Hell it could have gone to earth as far as I know. Hehe I feel kind of sorry for it. It would have grown up then as a human. Or at least it would have tried to pass itself off as a human but more than likely it went insane from being isolated from the main part of myself. It would have had shinigami qualities but more than likely would have looked human. For the most part."

"Well as interesting as that sounds, won't you be in trouble for this? Talking to me and telling me these things."

"Oh probably, in fact I wouldn't be surprised if the King had already signed my death warrant and is calling for my head."

"Then I don't get it, aren't you most concerned about your continuing life? Why would you put it in jeopardy like that?"

Ryuk shrugged.

"I told you I had a bad feeling and while you may not be quite the Raito I knew if anyone could get out of this alive and well it would be you, and now that you've teamed up with the Panda Man down there, you might as well just wave the victory flag. Hehe That's why I'm sticking with you guys like glue."

"Well thanks for the vote of confidence I guess."

"Also think of all the apples, I mean really…_apples_. I'll be set for the rest of my existence if I stay with you two, imagine all those beautiful fields of trees filled with to the brim with ripe, juicy, red, delicious apples…and all for me! Bwhahahahaah!!"

"Riighht-one other thing Ryuk. That man you were talking about earlier, the one who gave you the creeps? Can you tell me more about him?"

"Sorry Raito-o all I can give you is his name, and I suspect even that won't help you much. Though I will tell you this…he didn't have a life-span."

Raito felt his inside freeze up. It couldn't be…Raito felt the words chock in his throat as he spoke.

"Ryuk are you sure about that?"

"Yea yea I'm sure, his life-span isn't there. Kind of like yours."

Yeesss just like his…things that had puzzled him before were now becoming a little clearer. In a horrifying way they were becoming much clearer.

"I think I know now…I'm still not sure exactly but I might know why you feel that way Ryuk. Why you think I shouldn't trust them completely."

"Care to share?"

"Not yet. Not until I'm completely sure of it myself, and have some concrete proof that what I suspect is true."

"hmmm well fine I guess."

Raito looked at Ryuk, it was strange. This new Ryuk that floated beside him. Raito guessed that he was finally seeing the true shinigami in front of him instead of the clown he had been shown before. Because as much as he wanted to think that he had been smarter and better then Ryuk there was still a large difference. Ryuk may not be as intelligent as him in some manner but Ryuk was old and nonhuman. He was calculating and shrewd and was able to put on a performance so profound and believable that even Raito had fallen for it. Because if there was one thing that Shinigami's had that humans didn't was time. Lots of time and with that time came patience.

It made Raito feel somewhat angry. At himself as well as Ryuk.

"So…what is his name at least?"

Ryuk flipped in the air and dropped down a few feet causing Raito to follow him.

"His name is…Lucian Nótt."

_Oh shit…_

* * *

Ok I know short chapter. But a lot of shit happened. Well ok nothing really happened pre say but you learn a hell of a lot. This is what happens when you pop open an energy drink after being off the juice for months.

Stranger things have happen I guess but man do I have a headache. Owe!

Well can anyone guess the significance of the name? Anyone? Heh If anyone can figure it out and tell me I will personally hunt you down and kiss you! Hahaha XP

Please review and tell me what you think even I'm not sure what the hell my fingers are trying to tell me. I mean I think I just made the Shinigami King and the Little Mother suspects in being villains. I mean WTF?! 0.o I imagine that's what a lot of you are thinking right now.

Heeh but you have to admit things are certainty getting interesting and you have to admit…Ryuk is…certainly appealing when he is in smart mood. I didn't plan that one at all. But…nice. XD

Anyway please feel free to comment in Reviews or PMs or both! ^-^

Oh and please vote on my poll, it doesn't have anything to do with Death Note but all the same I would appreciate! XD


	30. Chapter 30

Chapter 30 to you, chapter 30 to you, chapter 30 dear readers, chapter 30 to you!

…*gets slapped*

;_; 'why…?' *sniff*

"Because you are a moron of the highest order."

*sniff*… 'meanie'

*gets slapped again*

Hey guess what! 'Darkness within your Light' has been nominated for The Universal FanFiction Open Awards!

Wooooooootttttttttt!!!!!!!

But it's only been nominated once…so go over there to second it!

Sadly because this is a work-in-progress I can't partake on the main contest.

Still! I got nominated! Nnnooomminnatteeddd!!! *dances around the room in glee!*

Vote for me when the time comes…yes? The address is here!

http://dotmoon(dot)net/awards/index(dot)php

Also I have fanart! Really! Wow…I cried some when I saw it-it was that good! The link in on my profile! Go check it out and comment! Thank you RaeKitsune! I love you!

* * *

'Well damn it things just have to get complicated by the second! As if I don't have enough to worry about!'

Raito floated all the way back onto the ground; landing right next to L who was sitting with his back to the tree. Raito had to steel himself from falling down right next to him.

"Raito-kun? Are you unwell? You're looking a bit…well paler then your usual complex when you're in this form."

Raito looked into the endless black eyes that he loved. Swallowing was particular painful at that moment.

'What would L say if he knew? I don't think that even he would forgive me.'

Raito shook his head, no he didn't have any proof yet that his theory was correct, so that's what it will remain a theory only. In fact, this theory was highly unlikely, there was a 98.9 percent chance that what he suspected was false. Nothing more than nerves and paranoia.

Right…

"I'm fine Ryu…I'm just not feeling that well at the moment, it's probably from being away from my LifeNote for so long."

L slowly nodded his head, it was clear he didn't entirely believe that but for now he was keeping quiet about his suspicion, which Raito was grateful for. He already had a headache and he really didn't want to add to the pain.

"I'm sorry about doing that you know…leaving you out of the conversation, I just thought it would be easier for Ryuk to spill if it was just me asking, I'll tell you everything that he said on the way back."

L nodded his head in understanding though Raito couldn't help but notice a slight stiffing in the shoulders, which meant that though L may have understood Raito's reasoning he was still a bit ticked off regardless.

"That would be acceptable Raito-kun."

"Ah well then-"

"Yea! Let's go get me some apples!!"

Raito would have face palmed himself if he was any other person, luckily for him he wasn't anyone else and so retained his dignity in the face of Ryuk's returned idiocy.

"Right well while you two were flying around I had put in a call for Ryuk's tree farm, it is in the country of China, I own some land over there and have bought out five large consumer apple farms. Needless to say I don't believe you will be running out of apples anytime soon Ryuk."

The scream of delirious delight was so loud that even after they walked back to the car and gotten in it was still ringing in Raito's ears.

---

As Watari drove them back to their base of operations Raito reviewed all that he learned from Ryuk to L.

As L listen he didn't interrupt, there were a few times were it looked like he wanted something clarified but bit his own tongue to hear it all out first.

One thing that Raito failed to mention though was the creepy man's name.

He told L that Ryuk still wanted to keep that information for himself for now, L gave Ryuk an annoyed look but he didn't argue or try to continue to bribe him with apples.

Ryuk just gave Raito an amused look when he told L that but luckily for him Ryuk must have decided to let the little white lie lay, probably because it amused him. Though it wouldn't surprise him if Ryuk decided to change that at a later date. Raito would just have to be ready for when that happened. Because there was no doubt in Raito's mind that Ryuk would do just that.

So Raito assured himself that he would tell L that information later before Ryuk got a chance to do it for him and get him in a load of trouble. But only after he had time to check out a few things.

Raito was so deep in thought that he failed to notice the way that L was holding the newly required DeathNote. He was grasping the note with tight hands. So tightly that his fingers were beginning to turn white.

Ryuk didn't miss it though, his large misshaped yellows eyes caught all that was in front of him, a singularly small frown grew on his face but washed away quickly when Raito faced him once again to try to get some answers from him which he gladly refused.

Ryuk was starting to get that bad feeling again. This time it was much worse.

---

After Raito returned to his own body he felt much better. Excepting a cup of warm tea from Watari he thanked him before sitting down on one of the office chairs. L sat across him, nibbling on some chocolate biscuits that Watari had left with the tea. Ryuk was still in apple bliss and was gulping down the huge basket of apples that Watari had acquired earlier, right after they had returned in fact.

Watari was really cool like that.

Raito decided that he would be the one to start the discussion this time.

"Ok so let's pile up what we know so far, we know that Mikami and Misa are active Kiras, we know that they have recruited people to their cause, what we don't know is what those people know, for all we know they might not even know about the DeathNotes or who Kira is. What we also know is that there are about three others who are privacy to that information though, we don't know their names or what their genders are-yet. They have not made any attempt to kill me or you, even though they can't which means that they still don't know your name. Back to that phone call that Mikami made earlier, we have to assume that Mikami believes that you are Kira. We still haven't really come up with a plan on how we're going to turn that around to our advantage."

"Actually Raito-kun I have thought up a simple solution."

"Oh? And what is that?"

"Simple-I go there and masquerade as Kira."

Raito paused, taking a deep breath and letting it out slowly before he calmly stated his thoughts on the manner.

"While Mikami might not know what I look like Misa does, and so does Rem if she is there. It wouldn't work, so it would be considered a suicide mission."

"I have thought of that Raito-kun and I have come up with a solution."

"And that is…?"

L paused for a second as if he had to think on how he was going to explain. Raito would have gotten annoyed but he found it slightly humorous that L had seen the need for a dramatic pause.

"…I would have to get a make-over."

Raito felt dumbstruck. What the hell was L going on about now?!

"…a make-over?"

"Yes, a complete work over, not so much that I looked completely like you but more so that I don't look like myself, I will convince them that I'm your proxy, or better yet…I am the New Kira. Yes that's it! Misa knows that you are Kira of course, and she might know that you…well defected from the cause so to speak. You joined L and are no longer worthy of being Kira. That must be why she has now gone to Mikami."

"Well my plan is this. I will masquerade as a devoted Kira follower, but as an agent of L. Now let's say that I work for L but I don't agree with him on Kira's views. In fact I've become greatly disturbed how L's professionalism is no longer the people's interest. Now Kira on the other hand, I agree with. So…let's say that L trusts me, and doesn't know my real allegiance. So while I know of the real identity of Kira I don't trust him in fear of his alleged allegiance with L. But I have acquired my own DeathNote so that will help in gaining their trust and belief that I am a Kira follower, and if he asks me why I led him to believe I was the original Kira it was because I was too much in awe so him to tell him so."

Raito paused for a minute in thought, it wasn't a bad plan pre-say but there were still a lot of holes in it.

Not to mention the biggest one of them all. The one that made Raito's insides turn to ice and a lump of dread fill his throat.

"There's just one thing that would cause a major problem L."

"Oh? What's that?"

"In order to gain their trust the DeathNote won't work by itself…you'd have to use it in front of them for them to believe you."

The silence that followed Raito's statement was icy. L's face was completely blank so much so that even Raito couldn't figure out what he was thinking.

Raito hated to say it; in fact he loathed himself for even thinking it. But it was the truth. L would have to use the DeathNote if he wanted to pass as a Kira. He'd have to commit murder in order to join a group of murderers to capture them.

But to do that…Raito couldn't let L go through with it, it would hurt too much. Not just L but for him as well.

"Let me do it L! I can go as Kira-I am-was Kira so it doesn't matter if I use it!"

L just glared at him which confused him.

"In case you've forgotten Raito-kun, I believe that you told me that if you use the DeathNote you'd die, or did you forget that?"

Raito froze. He had forgotten that. How the hell did he dismiss such an important fact?

If he wrote in the Death Note…he would rip his soul to pieces, it would rip so much that not even Mu could hold his scattered soul.

"I-I forgot…"

L's glare soften a little at Raito's slightly frighten voice.

"It's alright Raito-kun, as long as you remember from now on. Anyway you see my point? You can't go as Kira, and Mikami already thinks I'm Kira so it only makes sense if I go."

"B-but what if-"

"There is no time for what if's Raito-kun. We can't really afford to think such things."

"I know."

And Raito did know. He knew only too well.

* * *

If anyone wants anymore then please review! I mean it! I can't feel any love from you anymore *goes off to cry*

Sniff…love me-Love the story damn it!

REVIEW!!! Or I will end this story with some kind of terrible ending! A sad and tragic tale.

You ask 'like what'?

Well…NO MORE APPLES FOR RYUK FOREVER!!!

Ryuk: NNNNOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!! *rolls over and dies*


	31. Chapter 31

I'm soooo sorry!

It's been so long! I feel really really bad right now. And it's still so short!

Ah!

…moving on.

Thank you so much! Everyone is so nice to me, the reviews are still coming and everyone is so kind and wonderful when they review me! I luvs everyone!

Also I'm glad everyone likes how Ryuk turned out, a lot of people where sad when I made him a jerk earlier in the story so I made him better now, and it works with the story so I'm happy.

I will not abandon this story, it may be long between updates but I will see it till the end!

Ok now onto the story! ^-^

* * *

"Sir I have taken the liberty of inquiring the items you have requested."

Raito turned around and watched as Watari handed several large shopping bags to L. From the expression of silent suffering on L's face Raito was able to deduct that the bags must be filled with the items that would change L's normal features.

Well serves him right! If L wanted to go all gun hoe inside enemy territory then who was Raito to stop him?

'Oh nothing much, only his significant other.'

Sometimes Raito would like nothing more than to strangle the pale man. The man's habit of putting himself in danger was completely at odds with the exclusive detective of before. Raito almost missed the days when the detective was just a strange voice behind a white computer screen.

Raito could only hope that it hadn't been his influence on the man to make him this reckless. If so then Raito had no one to blame on the situation but himself.

'Well he might be more reckless but it kind of adds to his charm I guess.'

Raito stayed silent as he watched L root through the bags looking at items before either discarding them or putting them aside to try on later.

After their little argument they had both decided silently that they needed a small time out before either one of them said something that they would later regret.

So for several hours now they had both worked without talking to the other more then necessary. Well not talking to each other would be putting it mildly.

They were flat out ignoring each other.

L knew that Raito disapproved of his plan and Raito knew that L wouldn't change his plan just because he asked too.

It was a no win situation and until they found a counter-promise they didn't want to escalade things. Raito hated stalemates.

Raito turned back to his computer, in order for L's plan to be full proof Raito had started a series of journal entries and letters. Most of them were for Misa.

Because it wasn't Mikami they had to convince. No it was Misa-Misa.

Raito was pretty sure that Misa didn't remember L's real name from before. If she did then L would have already been dead.

The only problem was L's real name.

Because L's first real name _was_ L it created more than a foreseeable problem. Though they might be able to explain it off as the detective L stealing L Lawliet's name instead of them being the same person.

L Lawliet's identity of course had to be created in a way. Their plan so far was to say that L Lawliet was a long time employee of the detective L. With L Lawliet's computer skills they could say that he was L's personal computer programmer and that's why that they haven't heard about him before.

Watari was already creating a history trail for them too. L Lawliet was a graduated of MIT in America and had worked as a troubleshooter and a illegal hacker for several off the grid companies. Most of which were false but Watari was able to create an electronic history for them as well.

It also said that L Lawliet has only worked with the detective L for 8 years. This was the basic timeline for when the name of the detective L became public.

The letters and entries that Raito were creating where to date back months, the entries were to start when Raito first got the death note in the first place, they told of when he first inquired the death note and his thoughts and emotions and actions in the course of him owning it.

While Raito was typing he tried to stay true to his actual feelings that he had truly felt at the time, so that it didn't give off a feeling of falsehood.

Which was to say that he had to once again begin to think and feel like he did when he had actually been Kira.

It left a bad taste in the back of his throat but the more he wrote the easier it became. This for obvious reasons he couldn't decide it was a good thing or a very bad thing that it was becoming easier.

The letters were something else entirely.

They were all lies, false-_gross_-candy floss lies.

They were all addressed to Misa.

The first one was when Raito had first meet Misa. He told her in the sickening love letter how much he loved her at first sight, how beautiful she was and how self-sacrificing she had been. He wrote down that the kiss he had given her was the most beautiful thing he had ever done. Etc. etc.

It was all so false, and disgusting, don't forget disgusting.

He created five more letters, spanning the time when they were the only two Kira's alive and how that once he'd cleaned the earth and became god of the new world she would be his goddess to rule the world with.

He began to write to her about L, about how L had began to make promises. Promises that he had begun to believe in, about how L was beginning to see that Kira was right all along, that the world was dirty, that it needed to be cleansed.

That Kira had to be the one to do it.

Then he told her about L Lawliet, or what Raito called him because he didn't know his real name of course.

Law, a name given to him by the detective L. He told Misa about how Law and him began to strike up a somewhat shaky friendship behind L's back, about how Law told him that he was secretly a fan of Kira's and how he believed what Kira was doing was right.

He also wrote to Misa telling her that Law had told him that L was lying to him about believing in Kira and had scheduled a death sentence for Raito that would be effective as soon as Misa was caught.

He wrote to Misa telling her that L didn't know that he himself knew about the detectives supposed betrayal.

He continued with complements to her for going to Mikami and creating the school and its followers.

He also her that he was sending Law to her, that he'd be a big help, that L wouldn't miss him because Raito would be distracting him, that they needed to help rescue him.

Bullshit like that.

For the rest of it L would have to bullshit his way inside if the others became suspicious. Raito only had control over Misa, not anyone else.

Also that new man…Lucian Nótt. Raito had searched on the net for information on him but nothing has popped up.

Raito couldn't figure it out, who was this man? And how was it that he'd been able to scare Ryuk that badly when Raito himself had never been able to do that?

So many questions, and very few answers.

"Ah I think I have enough to start with now!"

Raito turned his chair around as L exclaimed.

Most of the bags were laying around the ground with piles of clothing stewed all over the floor, L was standing in the middle of it all, a calm spot in a sea of chaos.

A single medium sized bag was held in his hand.

Raito's eyebrow rose as L held up the bag with over exaggerated achievement.

"Well that's good Ryu…I guess all that's left now is to put all that on."

The beaming face fell.

"…and to brush your hair."

The face fell even more.

"Also you won't be able to eat any treats while you're undercover, you'll have to eat veggies and meat, no sugar because L is notorious for his sweets."

The face couldn't have been any more darker if it tired.

"Raito dear…your about a second away from getting a kick in the face."

Raito smiled sweetly and turned his chair around to go back to working on the letters.

"I love you too sweetie. Now go dress like a normal human being."

"…"

As soon as Raito heard the door close behind him the smile that was plastered on his face disappeared as a feeling of doom and forbidding welled around him.

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REVIEWS PLEASE!

I've rewritten this chapter at least three times, I'm thinking of changing my writing style but I'm not sure if that would be good this late in the fanfiction, It's been a long time since 2008 so of course my writing has changed.

What do you all think? Next chapter we will see L's new look, or should I say Law's look? XD

Hopefully the next chapter will be longer, can't promise anything though.


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